by K. Webster
“I can fix this,” I promise, though it’s not my fault and I don’t know how. “Let me help you fix this.” My hands slide up his neck and into his messy hair. I scrape my fingertips along his scalp. His eyes flutter closed briefly.
I steal the moment.
Inhale him.
Stare at him.
Feel him.
We’re on the edge of something, and it’s about to be taken away from me.
So I keep the moment for as long as I can.
I grip his hair tighter, making him open his eyes and hiss in warning. He clutches my throat tighter. Despite his anger and devastation, his body responds to mine. I can feel just how much so, as his dick rubs against mine through our jeans.
His shoulders sag slightly and his hand falls away from my neck. I pull his head toward mine. Forehead to forehead, we breathe in each other’s scent. Amber eyes lock onto mine—the brokenness in them causing little fissures inside my heart. I caress his scalp with my fingers, trying to convey wordlessly these intense feelings for him that have consumed my every thought.
Our mouths are so close.
I could kiss him.
Would it solve everything?
So close.
A tilt of my head.
I could make it happen.
He exhales and tilts forward, bringing his lips near enough to mine, they almost brush. “Remember, Hollis, if I lose her, I’ll ruin you in every way possible.”
Not a kiss.
Just cruel, hateful words that make my stomach clench violently.
“Roan…”
He pulls away so abruptly, I nearly collapse without his body holding mine up against the wall. Roan is hard in his jeans. An angry scowl paints his face into something hauntingly beautiful. Those lips…fuck. Those lips are pink and full and would feel so good pressed to mine.
“Roan…” My voice is shrill and pleading.
The vulnerable boy retreats into the shadows as the fierce one steps up, ready to defend.
“Get the fuck out of my life, rat.” He cracks his neck and gives me a scathing glare. “Or I’ll do it for you.”
Roan
I glower at Hollis through the window of the fire station as he slowly walks back to his car. His shoulders are hunched, utterly defeated. It’s bullshit. I’m the one suffering here because of his family, and he’s the one feeling sorry for himself.
His head turns, looking my way, but he can’t see me from his vantage point. He fumbles for his keys in his coat pocket. They fall to the snowy asphalt at his feet. His knees buckle and he grabs the side of his car before bending to get them. I’m still staring after him, even after he drives off, when a hand clamps down on my shoulder.
“Carol’s not going to separate you two. You know that, right?” Mike asks, his voice filled with fatherly authority.
I almost believe his tone.
Believe him.
But I’m not stupid.
Nothing ever goes right for me and Roux.
“She said that? In those exact words?” I challenge, shaking off his hand to turn and look at him.
Mike’s lips thin out and he nods. “Pretty much. I told her I have the garage apartment.”
“She’s letting Roux stay with you because you’re stable and can provide,” I grit out. “This has nothing to do with me. I’m only getting to stay because you like me. If it weren’t for you, we’d be split.”
He shrugs. “Maybe. But that’s not the circumstance. You do have me and you’re not getting split up.”
For now.
He doesn’t have to say the words because I feel them. I know them as truth.
“Come on,” he says. “Carol is leaving. It’s probably best I get you two settled in and back to the station while we have coverage.”
Ten minutes later, we pile into Mike’s big redneck truck. The drive is quiet, each of us trapped in our heads. I’m sure Mike is wondering how in the hell he managed to suddenly get himself two kids. Roux is scared. I’m just angry at the injustice of it all. He pulls into a familiar neighborhood.
Oh, Jesus.
Seriously?
“There’s Charlotte’s house,” Roux says, pointing at a house as we drive.
My body tenses when I notice a purple Mustang parked out front. Mike drives to the end of the street and hangs a left. His house is at a dead end with a green belt behind it. The house is modest in size but boasts a big garage—probably for his monster truck—and the apartment sits on top.
We climb out and Mike helps Roux with her bags. He shows us up to the garage apartment. Once inside, I take in the small space.
“This kitchen is outdated, but everything works. I just had everything serviced up here because I was considering renting the place out,” he says as he walks over to the fridge and opens it. “I’ll get some food for you guys. Until then, just help yourself to whatever’s in the house.”
Guilt niggles at me. He obviously needed the money if he was going to rent it out, and now here we are freeloading. I’m going to have to find a job and fast.
“The television works, as does the DVD player, but if you want cable, we’ll have to get a box added—”
“We don’t need it,” I blurt out. “We’ll be fine.”
He gives me a knowing nod and then shows us down a hallway. “Here’s the bathroom. The sink sometimes is slow to drain so just watch that.” He opens another door once in the hallway. “This was a laundry room at some point, but the plumber said it’d cost a shit ton of money to fix the pipes. We capped it off and I converted it to a small bedroom.”
Roux steps inside and points out the small window. “Look! You can see the ducks in that little pond!”
Hearing her excitement does something to me. It melts a glacier-sized hunk of ice on my heart. I’ll have to work my ass off to pay for this somehow, but I’ve never wanted anything more than to give Roux a safe place to stay. Someplace happy and homey.
“And the other bedroom is back here. It doesn’t have the duck view, but you have a fabulous view of the street,” Mike jokes.
Though I want to give Roux the bigger room, I like that I can see what’s coming for us with this view.
“I get the duck room,” Roux tells me. “Sorry, bro.”
“You wound me,” I tease.
“I’ll round up some stuff from the house and bring it back so you guys can get your beds made up and shower. If you need anything, you have my cell. Take today to get settled, but tomorrow I want you back at school.” He gives me a firm look. “Both of you.”
So much for dropping out and job hunting.
“Thanks, Mike.”
“No problem, kid.”
He leaves and my tension hitches a ride with him. Just Roux and me feels more like normal. They can’t fucking take her from me. I won’t be able to cope.
I make my way back to the duck room. She’s already unpacking her clothes into a small dresser that’s made of clear plastic. Leaning against the doorframe, I watch her.
“I like it here,” she tells me, looking up from her task. “Without Alejandro…without Mom.”
“I do too.” I scrub my palm down my face. “I’m going to work my ass off. I’ll make sure we get to stay here. Maybe even get someplace better eventually.”
“You’re afraid.”
I let out a heavy sigh and sit down beside her on the bed, hugging her to me. “I’m afraid they’ll tear us apart.”
“Me too.”
“They can try,” I say, ruffling her hair in a playful way.
We both grow quiet because it’s not a joke. If they separate us, I’ll do everyfuckingthing in my power to bring us back together again. My father is a law breaker. Maybe the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. I’d do it for Roux. I’d do anything for Roux.
“We’re going to be okay.” My whispered assurance does nothing to calm the stuttering in my heart.
Will we ever be able to relax in this lifetime?
“I hope so,” she sa
ys. “I really want us to be okay.”
I walk out of Coach Rendell’s office burning with anger. It’s irrational, but I want to throttle Hollis. He’s nowhere to be found, which is good, because there’s no telling what I’d do to him if I saw him right now.
Definitely not rub my fucking dick against him like yesterday.
A shot of lust shoots straight to my dick when I remember the way he ran his fingers through his hair and worried his plump bottom lip between his teeth. I was furious, but something about his nearness made me burn hot with something else. Something unfamiliar and strange.
Attraction.
Intensity.
Need.
I’ve fucked a few girls in my lifetime, and none of them, naked and balls deep on my dick, ever made me feel that way. It was mindless sex to get off and pass the time.
Hollis fucks with my head.
The hate I have for him feels a lot like desire.
Strangest fucking thing ever.
In this moment, I’m unsure if I could even kick his ass. Not that I’m afraid he’d get one over on me. That’s not it at all. I’m afraid I’ll let him do worse. Much worse.
Images of kissing him assault my mind—unwanted and hot.
It makes my headache worsen.
Fuck this and him.
I’m charging out of the locker room when I slam into a hard body. Terrence grips my shoulders and steadies me.
“Dude, what the fuck?” he mutters, his dark brown eyes assessing me. “Are you okay? What the hell happened yesterday?”
I rub at the back of my neck and let out a heavy sigh. “Too much.”
Footsteps round the corner, revealing Jordy and Cal. Jordy rushes over to me and yanks me to him for a hug. I let out a heavy sigh as I sink against my best friend, desperately needing his violent strength to get me through the fucking day.
“There are rumors and shit,” Jordy growls, pulling away to glower at me. “I want to know the truth.”
Cal nods behind him, his normally playful features twisted into a solemn expression. “Yeah, man. Tell us what’s up.”
My three best friends crowd in on me. We’ve been tight ever since I can remember. Bad boys with a bond. They’re my family.
As much as I want to throw Hollis under the bus, just to bitch about him, I can’t. So, I do what they ask. Tell the truth.
“Alejandro pulled a gun on me.” I wince at the reminder. My heart gallops in my chest. Had he pulled the trigger…
Jordy gently slaps at my cheek. “He did fucking what? Focus, man. You’re dazed right now. Are you on drugs?”
“W-What? No.” I pinch the bridge of my nose and shake my head. “Alejandro tried to mess with Roux. I don’t know what he was planning on doing, but I wasn’t fucking having it.”
Jordy’s eyes darken and his nostrils flare with barely contained rage. Roux is not just my little sister, she’s theirs too. They take care of her like their own.
“The fucker pistol-whipped me and then started in on Roux while I was out—”
Slam!
Jordy rams his fist through a locker, crunching it inward. The sound echoes loudly down the hall. I cringe, wondering if it was loud enough for Coach to hear.
“Did he…” Terrance trails off, unable to finish.
Cal’s haunted expression chills me to my core.
“No,” I mutter. “I woke up and beat the fuck out of him.”
Jordy slides down the wall of lockers, falling on his ass. Anger is his go-to expression, but currently, his features are pinched. His eyes are glassy. I don’t miss the tremble in his hand before he scrubs his palm over his face.
“So you bailed?” Cal asks, brows pinched.
“Not exactly. I got a concussion. I was kind of out of it and it scared Roux.”
Jordy growls. “I’ll fucking kill that asshole.”
“You don’t have to kill him,” I assure my best friend. “We’re out of there.”
His menacing glare seems to argue otherwise.
“Did you call the police?” Terrence asks, knowing if I did, it was a last resort kind of thing.
“No, uh, after Roux tried calling you guys, she eventually called her friend Charlotte, who woke up her mom, Kelsey.”
All three guys’ shoulders slouch when they realize Roux tried to contact them.
“I was sleeping, man, or otherwise,” Cal tries, his voice hoarse.
I grip his shoulder. “I know. It’s okay.”
Jordy pulls his knees to his chest and bends down, bumping his forehead over and over again on his knees. “I should have answered.”
“Kelsey is Hollis’s mom.” I bite out the words, hating the bitter taste on my tongue.
“What?” Terrence demands, now pacing beside me. “That prissy purple car motherfucker?”
Jordy is on his feet in an instant, all despair erased as rage fuels him forward. He stands too close, assessing me. “He went with his mom to get you?”
I nod and let out a sigh. “They took me to the fire station to see Mike. Apparently I might have a concussion. It’s enough that Coach doesn’t want me playing tonight. I’m benched.”
Cal groans. “Fucking really? We need you, man.”
“You have Hollis now,” I bite out harshly. “Coach says you guys will manage a game without me, especially with him on the team.”
The truth of Coach’s words hurt.
I’ve been replaced by a prettier, richer, more perfect version.
A golden boy.
I’m nothing but old news. Replaceable. A problem that needs fixing.
“So the fucker tells his aunt and CPS gets involved?” Jordy demands. “Now they’re going to take Roux away from us?”
My heart races wildly in my heart. “No one is fucking taking her.”
He relaxes. “Damn straight.”
“We’d kick their asses if they tried,” Terrence grumbles.
“Make them regret the day they messed with Little Hoodlum,” Cal agrees. “Do you need a place to stay? I bet Mom and Dad wouldn’t mind.”
“For now, Mike’s letting us stay with him.” I let out a heavy sigh. “I’m going to have to lie low for a while. I can’t get into any shit and risk them yanking Roux into the system.”
All three guys nod, features contorted into angry scowls.
“Don’t worry.” Jordy snarls, his eyes locking in on a target behind me in the hallway. “We’ll do the dirty work for you.”
We all turn to see Hollis walking toward us, his head down and shoulders slumped. He doesn’t notice us until he nearly runs into Terrence. As soon as he acknowledges the four of us, he tenses and straightens. His eyes dart over to mine, concern glimmering in them.
I look away.
“Watch where you’re going, rat,” Terrence snaps, shoving Hollis back.
He stumbles but regains his footing before falling. Fury turns his pale features crimson and he fists his hands, readying for a fight. As though the porcelain boy is a match for four Hoodlums.
“Roan,” Hollis says, eyes burning into me as he ignores the others. “Can we talk?”
“Fuck no, you can’t talk,” Jordy sneers, stalking over to him. His chest bumps Hollis’s. “If you have something to say, you say it to me.”
Hollis tries to look around Jordy, but Jordy isn’t having that shit. He grabs Hollis by the jaw and shoves him against the bank of lockers on the wall, pressing his head into the depressed locker he ruined moments earlier. Hollis wriggles to no avail, panic flashing in his blue eyes.
“You stay away from my boy,” Jordy warns. “Or I will fucking crush you.” To punctuate his words, he digs his fingers into Hollis’s jaw.
Hollis cries out in pain.
The sound burns down my spine, chasing butterflies into my stomach. I don’t understand the sensation, but it isn’t a pleasant one.
“Not here,” I murmur. “You’ll get your ass in trouble.”
Jordy holds Hollis in his punishing grip a second longer before
releasing him roughly. He spits at Hollis’s feet before stalking off down the hall. Terrence and Cal saunter after him. I start to follow, but Hollis grabs my bicep before I get far.
I shake off his hold and step close, my face inches from his. “You heard Jordy. Stay away from me.”
His brows furrow together. “I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
“You stole my spot on the team for tonight’s game and your family called CPS on mine.” I laugh cruelly at him. “I’m fucking peachy, rat.”
I start to pull away, but he fists my hoodie, pulling me flush against him. My hand flies to the smashed locker behind him to keep from slamming my hips on his. His breathing is uneven and mine is harsh. Bravely, he stares at me as though he can project thoughts straight into my skull.
Don’t hurt me.
I won’t hurt you.
A shudder ripples through me. I don’t like the spooky ass mental vibes he’s giving me. Like he knows me. I met the guy Monday. He doesn’t fucking know me.
“Roan, I’m not a bad guy.” His blue eyes soften, warming the iciest parts of me.
I cool every part inside me, especially the heat flooding down to my dick. “Sucks for you then, rat,” I mutter, leaning in to brush my words against the shell of his ear, “because I am.”
Hollis
The crowd screams when I make my shot. Adrenaline races through my veins, chasing away every nervous or uneasy feeling. When I’m on the basketball court, I’m in my element. A few guys from the team slap my back in appreciation as they pass.
Not the Hoodlums.
Terrence curls his lip up in disgust.
Cal’s nostrils flare.
Jordy shoots me glares filled with venom and hate.
Besides that, still feeling pretty good.
That is, until I catch Roan’s stare on the sidelines. He’s benched, just as he said, watching the game with furrowed brows and sadness gleaming in his eyes.
Someone from LHS rams into me, knocking me to a knee. Coach yells at me to pull my head out of my ass. Roan now smirks at me, satisfied.
Fucker.
