by Helen Jacey
The principle of union is extremely important to many heroines’ stories and women-orientated genres. It can sometimes seem like an overriding principle. It’s true that many women like stories that explore love, even if it’s love gone wrong. Women seem to prefer emotional stories in which the heroine experiences relationships, including the highs and lows of happiness, loss, caring, warmth, intimacy, and commitment — the joyful aspect of being in a family or a relationship.
How you personally feel about the joyous and union-filled aspects of heroines’ stories will very much depend on your own attitudes to union. For instance, if you are a man who recoils at overt joyous femininity, you might feel very uncomfortable around emotions and label them women’s stuff. This is where “chick lit” and “chick flicks” have emerged from, a strong need to label anything about relationships as women’s light and fluffy stuff. The more open you are to expressions of emotion, the more you might enjoy stories about love and friendship. You might like films such as Sideways and A Single Man because they show men experiencing deeply emotional situations, by following the Path to Wholeness story type.
If you are a woman who basically identifies with the relatively gender-free Future Femininity Supertheme, you might cringe at films like Mamma Mia! The overlayering of union in genres such as romantic comedies and comedies might be off-putting to you. Or you might prefer more “masculine” action-oriented movies. Many women writers love union as much as women audiences. You want to create stories that reflect joy, harmony, happiness, and love. The Layers of Union can help you do this.
THE LAYERS OF UNION
Just like you need to work out the layers of Conflict in your heroine’s story you need to know the layers of union. They directly correspond to the layers of Conflict. The layers of union are:
Layer 1: Internal Union
Layer 2: Significant Other Union
Layer 3: Family Union
Layer 4: Community Union
Layer 5: Culture Union
Layer 6: Nation Union
Layer 7: World Union
Layer 1: Internal Union
Internal union is a sense of inner peace, self-acceptance, and contentment. It’s a state of mind that is free from anxiety, self-doubts, negative thoughts, and destructive emotions. In many ways, inner peace is connected to an ability to feel part of the whole, an ability to see ourselves as one, not as a separate from everyone else. It’s a transcendental way of being. This internal state of grace can be very difficult for humans, with our demanding egos and our need to compete, survive, and achieve.
Internal union has many different facets for women. Women experience an overwhelming number of thoughts each day about their self-image. This comes from culture judging women on how they look and women buying into this judgment and doesn’t exactly lend itself to a transcendental way of thinking. For some women, self-image anxiety is permanently on the back of their mind, to the point of obsession. Rare and fortunate is the woman who feels great about herself Even rarer is the heroine who gives off self-assured contentment about her self-image (and it isn’t a problem in the story).
Pregnancy is a physical state of internal union. Not only is a woman creating life inside her body, that life is part of her and growing from her. Other parts of her body, like her immune system, will shut down to protect the life in the womb. Pregnant women can experience a very powerful form of union with their unborn child. They are literally fused with another.
It’s possible that as a woman ages, and finds herself increasingly invisible, she might be able to achieve self-acceptance that isn’t dependent on approval of her looks. I’m sure that if you are a woman reading this, you will have had the same thoughts. Thoughts along the lines of…“When I’m old and ugly, I won’t even care anymore!”
Self-union also takes the form of masturbation. A woman who feels at one with herself can give herself pleasure in a very satisfying way. Many women find it extremely difficult to feel comfortable with their own bodies, as sex education doesn’t tend to teach girls about understanding their own feelings of desire and emphasizes the risks of penetration. The true organ of pleasure for a woman is the clitoris, championed most overtly by Sex and the City and the rise of the Rampant Rabbit vibrator but rarely in love-making scenes. In The Private Lives of Pippa Lee, Pippa has nonpenetrative sex with her neighbor’s son. He is a spiritually minded man, and his way of making love to her can be seen as an act of giving to a woman who is not good at putting herself first.
Layer 2: Significant Other
This layer is all about the sense of union we get from another individual. It’s the governing principle behind the desire for love and intimacy. It symbolizes our need to find our soul mate, friend for life, and fellow traveler. Union also reflects the earliest memories of oneness we all felt with our first caretakers, even the safety of the womb. Union, at its most primal, is a dependent and unconditional bond. Love with a significant other, whether it’s a lover, child, or parent, can be blissful. It’s nice to be completely understood and to understand the other.
Women’s desire for love is not necessarily stronger than men’s, but it does tend to dominate many heroines’ stories. Women are able to express this desire more because, as I’ve mentioned, it’s that much more permissible in our culture.
The romantic ideal of man as savior is very powerful, but it tends to be an empty myth for women who have very close early relationships with their mothers and fathers. These women have strong self-esteem and idealization of the other is not such a factor for them. These women seek equal relationships and the need to be saved is not such a feature of their love. But how many women have this? Most of us have been brought up by mothers, stressed, tired, loving, and supportive in equal measure. She’s the figure we love and we hate in equal measure. If finding love is important to your heroine, it’s a good idea to really know her backstory. What is getting in the way of her ability to find love with the right person? What wounds does she have to heal to be able to love? In love relationships, the physical act of sex is an intensely powerful union, when it’s between two people who really care for each other. Sex that is not based on intimacy tends to be fuelled by eroticism and fantasy projections about the other person. The sense of arousal is not dependent on knowing the person deeply and doesn’t have the sense of intimacy that comes from commitment, trust, and openness. This is why you can have bad sex with the person you are committed to when trust issues, power dynamics, and lack of communication are sabotaging the relationship. What kind of sex life does your heroine have? Think about how she feels pleasure, and whether intimacy is easy for her.
Layer 3: Family
Birthdays, weddings, anniversaries, and even funerals where we share our deepest memories of the loved one, and bade them farewell, symbolize the union in family life. A family can give a sense of belonging and connection that is truly special and everlasting. Again, the biological family might not be as important as those your heroine believes make up her real family — the people around her who really care for her. It’s important for you to work out whether the family really offers your heroine a sense of union, and how.
Female friends and women’s support networks become like family to many women. Women’s ability to share and empathize with each other is equalized by an ability to care for each other. The notion of sisterhood is built on the understanding that women understand the burdens placed on each other and are the best people to really share the load. The Virgin Suicides is a mysterious exploration of sisterly love that achieves a state of ultimate union through death.
Layer 4: Community
Union in the community is symbolized in the all the ways a community looks out for each other, celebrates together, and supports each other. Your heroine will always be in a community of one sort or another, so how is she going to experience union there? In St. Trinian’s, the community of renegade and anarchic British boarding school girls is also their family (most of them being dumped their by rejec
ting families). Union comes in the form of riotous pranks and a live and let live philosophy.
Layer 5: Culture
Expressions of union are shaped and determined by a heroine’s culture. In the course of your research, you might find some surprising aspects of cultural union. In my research for a screenplay set in the Edwardian era, I discovered that weekend house parties were all the rage for the aristocrats. In addition to the hunting, feasting, and dancing there would be spouse swapping. A servant would ring a discreet bell at 6 a.m. so that philandering partners could creep back into their rightful beds to join their spouses! This happened up and down the country in all the aristocratic houses. Whatever her culture, there will be a whole variety of ways expression of union are permitted. The more male-dominated a culture is, joy for women can be furtive, often taking place in and among women.
Layer 6: Nation
A nation’s sense of union is often seen in stories in which success or achievement is celebrated. This could be victory or another kind of commemoration of a nation’s pride. Dedication is a strong drive in the heroine who wants to make her country proud or to fight for it in some way, even if it is simply by supporting her husband going to war. National heroines can be sportswomen, such as the heroine in National Velvet and International Velvet. The truly heroic heroine who is not scared to put down her life is primarily motivated for the common good. If she survives, her victory is a shared one. Many women aren’t recognized for their achievements until after their deaths and remain forgotten heroines. Writing a film about their lives in order to share it with the world is a form of belated celebration. Rabbit-Proof Fence celebrates the bravery of female aboriginal children.
Layer 7: World
This is symbolized by the fragile notion of world peace. It comes from alliance and diplomatic efforts to sustain good relations between countries. Women as politicians are taking their place on the world stage, yet there are still too few of them. The Olympics represent the union of nations in sports. Although the action is competitive, the spirit of cooperation is the overriding principle. Women athletes and politicians extend women’s participation on the world stage. Let’s take a look at the layers of union in two very different films, Mamma Mia! and The Secret Life of Bees.
Mamma Mia!
Mamma Mia! is a global phenomenon that filled movie theaters all over the world with female audiences who saw the film many times, many of whom have never seen the musical version on stage. Was it just the Abba songs that made it so extraordinarily successful? They certainly helped the exuberance of the production, but the film’s utter joyousness, its celebration of love and life, of mother/daughter relationships, female bonding, and the power of love were other equally important ingredients in the recipe of success. It’s easy to laugh at Mamma Mia! but not at the box-office numbers. It was a resounding commercial success. So why did the film have such a powerful connection with women (and men who don’t have a problem with Feel Good Femininity!)? I am sure the success of the film was due to the rich layers of union that took precedence over the Conflict, jeopardy, and stakes.
Layer 1: Internal Union
The joint heroines of Mamma Mia! are Sophie, a young woman on the verge of getting married, and her mother Donna. Sophie is a character with a great sense of fun and is expressive and vital. The love and support she’s had from Donna as a mother has given Sophie strong self-esteem reflected in her ability to fall for the right guy. Donna has less internal union than Sophie because of baggage from the past, but she’s still got a fair degree of inner strength and harmony. She’s got a sense of pride in her work achievements, is proud of her daughter, and like Sophie, still has the capacity to have a good time.
Layer 2: Significant Other Union
Sophie’s love for both her fiancé Skye and her mother Donna are great sources of happiness for her. Her relationship with Skye is full of sexual passion. He cares, understands, and wants the best for her, and is her equal in showing affection and emotion. He is also a loyal guy who will neglect his own needs to be by her side. Sophie’s love for Donna is slightly more complex, but she is devoted to her mother and grateful for all she has done for her.
Donna adores her daughter so much she doesn’t want her to leave the island. For many single mothers, their whole identity depends on their role as mother. This is the case for Donna who wants to be the mother for Sophie that she never had herself – supportive, encouraging, and close. The other significant other in Donna’s life is Sam, who comes back for Sophie’s wedding. He was the big love of her life before a misunderstanding drove them apart. Happiness for Donna comes at the end of the film when Sam gets down on bended knee and proposes. He has always loved her, always loved the island, and wants to spend the rest of his life with her. Not only that, he also understands she needs to let go of Sophie. What choice does Donna have but to say “I do!” to a guy who understands her so completely?
For mother and daughter, happiness from significant others comes from being honest, being real, and letting someone else in.
Layer 3: Family Union
Sophie and Donna’s family love not only comes from their intense mother/daughter relationship, but also the wider family each of them have. They both have two special girlfriends who are like sisters to them. Sophie even refers to her mother’s friends as “aunties.” These sisterly friends know Donna and Sophie backward. They are close, loving confidants and partners in the crime of having as much raucous fun as possible.
Layer 4: Community Union
The Greek island is a loving community where overworked Greek women can throw down their aprons and become dancing queens. They love and support Donna, and work hard for her. The island is beautiful, verdant, and surrounded by a magical azure sea. It’s hard to imagine anything really bad happening here, and in the story, it doesn’t!
Layer 5: Culture Union
The ancient symbol of love in the form of Aphrodite’s Fountain gives the story a mythical dimension.
Layer 6: Nation Union
Greece is seen as a warm and caring nation in the story. It’s a country where different people live happily side by side and nothing threatening happens. It’s a country people travel to so they can escape their lives.
Layer 7: World Union
The wider world beyond the island is also a positive factor in Mamma Mia! for both heroines. Sophie ends up traveling the world with Skye, having resolved her Maternal Lessons and Father Distance issues. She’s now going to have the wild fun life that her once nomadic mother had. Donna’s past life revisits her in the form of her three international boyfriends, and their arrival on the island heals all the unresolved issues of her life. You get a sense Donna’s reunion with Sam is going to give her a more international life again.
Now let’s move on to a film in which union is just as important but takes place in a completely different setting and time.
The Secret Life of Bees
Layer 1: Internal Union
Although Lily has painful emotional wounds from losing her mother when she was three, she also manages to experience a sense of internal union in a fantasy of her life with her mother. She also has the gift of writing, which reflects an ability to enjoy the company of one’s own thoughts. By the end of the story she is at peace with herself and enjoying her life.
Layer 2: Significant Other Union
Lily has a deep love of her nanny Rosaleen, by whom she feels protected and cared for. She forms a deep relationship with August, who was her mother’s nanny. August is warm, understanding, and able to meet Lily’s emotional wounds. Eventually, Lily forms a special bond with Zach, a boy her age. They feel romantically attached to each other and encourage each other to share their dreams. He is the first positive male role model for Lily, who has been brutalized by her father.
Layer 3: Family Union
By entering the Boatwright sisters’ household, Lily finally achieves a sense of belonging. The sisters have created a special and safe environment where raci
sm and hostility are shut out. A misfit at first, all the sisters grow to love her in different ways. The last one to love her is June. When Lily sprays her with water, June’s icy reserve finally melts. Not only does she play with Lily and the others in the water fight, she lets herself cry in front of Lily and be comforted by her. As Lily proudly says herself at the end of her story, “I have three mothers.”
Layer 4: Community Union
Although the Deep South is riddled with racism, the sisters have managed to create a sense of love in their own community. The white lawyer respects and supports them.
Layer 5: Culture Union
The power of the black Madonna statuette in the household symbolizes the hope and strength of African Americans.
Layer 6: Nation Union
National politics, the Civil Rights Act, and desegregation all reflect a nation taking the right steps toward uniting the people and aspiring to treat all as equals.
Layer 7: World Union
The roots of Africa are symbolized in the story as the proud heritage of the African American community. This gives a global dimension to the otherwise very localized story.
THE STEPS TO LOVE
Most screenwriting guides don’t pay much attention to the process of falling in love. When you consider the number of heroines’ stories that have a relationship at their heart, it can be useful to have a model that helps you think through the dynamics of finding love and experiencing a relationship.
The model I’m going to present to you is a result of many factors; my own experiences of life and love, writing about relationships, and watching films about relationships. Just like the phases of a heroine’s story, these steps are not necessarily linear. Relationships are organic, constantly in flux, and sensitive to many internal and external factors. Many of these steps are truly repetitive as well. Although a couple is making progress, they might repeat certain steps. A couple may go through the cycle and back to the beginning again. Or one person in the relationship might go back to earlier steps or even jump ahead. This is commonly felt in relationships that feel out of balance, when one person isn’t ready, and feels the other is pushing too much.
