It’s hard to believe that was a little over twelve hours ago—when I stood in front of him after getting past the heart attack he gave me, and he told me that he had fallen in love with me. I felt like my entire life changed in that moment and I was someone else. For that brief time, I felt so happy, like something clicked into place and I was finally my true self. Then it all came crashing down when he told me goodbye, for good. I was so distraught, I don’t even remember going back to the table. Gabriel was concerned because I didn’t seem well. I do recall that—it’s how I was able to cut dinner short. There was no way I could maintain my composure for very long.
Once I got home, it took me an hour to drum up the courage to call Ian. I’m not sure what I was expecting to happen when I did, but him barreling through my door ten minutes later and changing the meaning of my existence wasn’t something I fully anticipated. Though a part of me was terrified, not so much of him but of what could happen by letting down the walls that protected me, I’m actually glad he did. Knowing his feelings for me combined with the intensity of all that was sparking between us, before we even touched, I may have fallen in love with him, again, in that split second before he held me in his possessive embrace.
There was a raw power radiating from him when he walked through my front door, slamming it behind him as his momentum never faltered. His wild eyes focused on nothing but me, he took me in his arms without a word or need to ask, and kissed me with such desperate hunger I was on the verge of weeping. I will likely relive last night in my mind until I take my last breath…and maybe beyond that.
No longer able to hold it, I quietly get out of bed and head to the bathroom. Once I’ve relieved myself, the soreness in my body makes itself known and is screaming for a hot shower. Turning on the water, I wait for it to heat up as I stare at myself in the mirror. Naked and flushed…and young, healthy, beautiful, like Ian imagined in his drawing of me.
I want to be more like her, strong and confident, not controlled by fear brought on by the mistakes of others. Erika’s words of wisdom echo in my head, and she’s right—I can’t live my life according to my mother’s weakness, and I can’t hold my father’s infidelity against anyone but him. Last night was a major step in that direction, finally moving past the anxiety that controlled me for so long.
I step into the shower and let the hot water run through my hair, down my face and body. The heat feels amazing as it warms my skin and soothes my muscles. Taking a few deep breaths, I shut out everything but the darkness that held on to me for so long. I envision the fear and anxiety, black like ink, rinsing off my body, mixing and fading in the water at my feet before it washes down the drain. I stay there, my lungs expanding further through my exercise, letting the shower continue to wash away the lingering negative emotions until the murky water runs clean. I open my eyes and take a deep, invigorating breath, letting it flow through my veins, giving me a natural high I haven’t felt since I was a child.
I stay there for a minute or so, wondering if I’m imagining what just came over me. It’s as if I’m lighter, freer. There’s a rush of energy swirling through my core, I swear it’s as if I can genuinely feel more than I could. Like the tickle of water running across my skin, the heat penetrating my muscles, the ache between my legs, the butterflies in my stomach as I think of Ian sleeping in my bed. I turn around and step out of the water flow to open my eyes and take another deep breath. The heat feels too good to completely step away, so I stay under enough to let it flow down the front of me.
“Stay…just like that.”
Ian’s deep voice startles me, and I shift to turn to him. “No. Don’t turn around.” I stop, surprised by the command. He’s in the shower with me; I can feel him though he’s not touching me. “Close your eyes, Charlotte.” He’s closer now. His voice right there behind my ear. My heart is suddenly pounding as a surge of warmth gathers between my legs. Dear God, he hasn’t even touched me yet.
He continues. “Do you know what this is doing to me right now? You, naked, water running down your perfect body, over your mouthwatering ass. I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you.”
I suck in a breath as he places a warm kiss on my shoulder, tongue gliding over my skin, teeth scraping, giving me chills as his stiff erection presses against me.
“I want to look at you,” I say as I start to turn toward him again.
“No. Just stay like this. All I want you to do is feel. When your eyes are closed it heightens your senses. When your eyes are open, you know what’s coming and anticipate how it will feel before you actually feel it. You’d be amazed at how much that can dull down your pleasure.” He steps back, then says, “Put your arms down by your side and move your feet apart.”
My arms fall, exposing me, and the sensation of the water spraying down on my breasts and nipples is suddenly erotic. My head falls back a little. But when I spread my feet, it opens me just enough to allow a stream of water to run down my slit and across my sensitive nub. There is barely any pressure, but I know Ian is watching me. His energy vibrating behind me, magnifying the subtle pleasure’s intensity. I involuntarily arch my back, lifting my ass up at the same time my hands reach back to glide up my cheeks, pulling slightly, spreading me as an invitation for him to touch where the water is tickling me.
Ian startles me with an abrupt, “Don’t do that, Charlotte.”
I let go, upset that I did something wrong. Opening my eyes, I say, “I’m sorry. I didn’t know…”
“You don’t need to apologize, I do.” He comes close behind me again and kisses my ear. “Close your eyes, beautiful. My mission here was to bring you intense pleasure. Not to have you make me explode before I’ve even had a chance to touch you and make you cum at least three times.” He laughs and kisses down my neck. “Your spell on me is too powerful. I need to learn to adjust.” Hearing his words rekindles my arousal. Stepping back again, he says, “We are about to be out of hot water, so no more misbehaving.” He gives my wet ass cheek a loud smack, sending a jolt of pleasure directly between my legs where I feel another wave of heat.
“Put your hands out in front of you, lean forward, and rest them on the wall.”
I do as he says, and the new position ratchets up my excitement. The water is now spraying down my lower back, my breasts are hanging and vulnerable, tingling in the cool air. Leaning forward with my legs spread has the water running across me from the other direction, and it’s just as enticing.
He leaves me like this, allowing me to focus on the new sensation for a minute, then surprises me by gently reaching around to play with my nipple. My head falls forward and my breath catches. Just that slight touch, dear God. He lets go; I barely have a chance to recover and he’s onto the other breast. This time, my abdomen tightens, making my hands almost slip down the wall.
Through the fog that’s taken over my brain, I hear his deep voice say, “Jesus, woman, the sounds you make are enough to drive me insane.” I didn’t even know I made a sound; all I’m focused on is the sensation of the water running across my ass all the way to my clit, him teasing my nipple and the sound of his sensual voice. It’s literally enough to trigger an orgasm. But I hold back, hoping he will touch between my legs.
“Stay like you are and turn off the water,” he says.
I do it. Then he releases me and steps away. The suddenness of the air moving around my wet body, the leftover sensations of his hand on my nipple and water running across my sex has me biting my lip so I don’t beg him to fuck me. Before I’m fully adjusted to the change, he touches the inside of my ankle and I whimper, as the walls of my entrance squeeze together, throbbing as they relax, then tightening again.
He slowly meanders up the invisible erogenous line of my leg to the back of my knee. My hands slip a little as my head falls forward—the pleasure has become so intense. The wet heat between my legs is pumping, readying itself for him. As he passes my knee and spreads his fully open hand on the inside of my thigh, my breathing becomes heavy and
my whole body is hit with a hot flash of intense arousal.
The hunger and anticipation to have him touch my wet core is almost unbearable. Yet, when he gets there, right as the side of his hand touches my outer lips, he lets go. I cry out, pushing my ass toward him, begging for him to finish. A second later, he drags his fingers through the slick secretion from my clit all the way to my ass—slowly, precisely, gently massaging, bringing my climax to surface, but not allowing it to escape. Seconds prior to finally releasing, he grabs onto both sides of my ass, spreading me apart, and drives his rigid cock into my wetness, detonating an orgasm that is so intense I almost collapse.
Thankfully, he leans forward to put one hand next to mine on the wall and the other around my stomach so his strong arm is holding me up, because there is no way I would be able to hold myself up through his relentless pounding and the strength of the orgasm spasming through me. I give up all control, handing it over to him as my body floats through the euphoria as my contractions start to diminish around him.
He is nowhere near completion and I am so turned on by his primal need, the sound of our wet skin slapping together and his growling exertion, I feel another orgasm building before the first has fully subsided.
“I feel you tightening on my cock. Cum for me again.” He reaches down and rubs my clit, sending me over the edge. I scream out his name as my hips thrust back toward him forcing him to go deeper. He makes an agonizing sound as his orgasm takes hold and finally ignites. It’s so powerful I can feel it releasing inside me.
Wrapping both arms around me, he straightens, lifting me up so my back is to his chest. He quickly turns and leans against the shower wall. His body is angled so I can relax against him; my toes are barely touching the floor as he pumps through the last waves of his release.
My body goes limp in his strong arms, my head falling back to his shoulder. His breathing is heavy as he asks, “Are you okay?”
All I can do is nod. I can’t move or open my eyes, not while I’m still throbbing around him.
We stay like that for several minutes longer. “Let me dry you off and lay you in bed. You need to rest after that.”
I don’t disagree, although I’m concerned I may not wake up. Is it possible to die from too much pleasure?
Turning me around as our bodies detach, he puts his hand on my face and I open my eyes. His expression stops my already struggling heartbeat. “That was unreal, Charlotte. How have I lived this long without you?”
I look in his eyes a second longer, smile a weak smile, and lay my head on his chest. I don’t have the strength to respond. All I want to do is hold him.
Picking me up and setting me on the rug outside the shower, he dries off my body then grabs another towel for my hair. He takes me back into the bedroom and gently guides me to lie down so I don’t collapse. I’m so relaxed as I watch him dry off his sculpted body, completely sated by the post-orgasm hormones tingling in my veins. I’m floating on a cloud and I have the sudden urge to confess my love to him. But I don’t.
Finishing, he looks back at me and smiles, tossing the towel on the floor, then crawling back in bed beside me. Bringing the sheets up to cover us, he leans down to gently kiss my lips, “If you keep looking at me like that, I’m going to start writing sonnets and other poetry about your beauty and how you’ve enchanted me.”
I can only summon a weak smile. “I would like that.” My eyes close, the weight of my eyelids wining the battle over what little strength I have left.
A few hours later, I’m awakened by the smell of coffee. It is well past sunrise, and I’m a little off as I muster the energy to get out of bed. After splashing cold water on my face and brushing my teeth, I wrap my naked body in my favorite robe. Looking at myself in the mirror, I whisper on an exhale, “What have you gotten yourself into?” and laugh as I open the door to go find Ian.
When I enter the living room, my heart stops. He’s sitting on the balcony sipping coffee and reading the paper, wrapped only in a towel at his waist, the late morning sun shining on him. The scene is so domestically comfortable I’m struck with an overwhelming sense of joy, and strangely, nostalgia. I stand there for a minute longer, taking it in as a tickling vibration swirls around inside my chest.
No longer able to not be near him, I walk out onto the balcony, take the paper out of his hand, and set it on the table as he puts his coffee down next to it. He looks up at me with those gorgeous eyes as I step over to straddle his lap and sit down. Smiling, I bring my hands up behind his head and lean in to give him a slow and sensual kiss, ending with my teeth dragging across his bottom lip in a tender bite. “Good morning, Mr. McAlistair.”
“It is a good morning, indeed. But I need to warn you. If you kiss me like that again, I’m going to open this towel, set you down on my stiff cock, and fuck another orgasm out of you right here on the balcony. I still owe you one from the shower.” His voice is deep and delicious, and it sends my body into complete, hot arousal.
He chuckles and adds, “From the look on your face and the size of your pupils, I won’t have to wait until you kiss me again. Tell me, Charlotte, if I reach into your robe and touch your sweet pussy, will I find you soaking wet for me?” His eyes are now dilated, and my whole body flushes with another wave of heat.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, you will. You seem to have magic powers over not only my pussy, but my entire body. I’m now convinced you could make me cum with just the sound of your voice,” I say, sitting up straighter and arching my back enough to put pressure on his fully erect shaft.
“I’m this close, Charlotte,” he says in a strained voice, holding up his finger and thumb, barely a half inch apart. “I wasn’t joking when I said I’ll never get enough of you.”
“Okay, I’m sorry. That last move was somewhat…involuntary.” I lean down and give him a peck on the lips. “I wasn’t joking when I said you have magic powers over me.” Getting up, I go inside to fix a much-needed cup of coffee. Back on the balcony, I notice his erection has not subsided—at all—and the look on his face has me nervous and excited at the same time.
“Can you take some time off work? I want to be alone with you, with no obligations or potential interruptions. I have a place in the Bahamas that I think you will love. We can fly out this evening.” He’s dead serious, and my brain is still sleepy enough to have a hard time registering his question and everything it implies.
“Umm…I…don’t know. Can I finish this cup of coffee? That’s a lot to think about after coming out of a coma.” I take a sip from my mug, both because I need it and also to buy me some time. Fly to the Bahamas and stay with him? For how long? Is that too much too soon? I feel myself starting to panic.
Apparently reading my body language, Ian interjects my over-firing mind with, “Don’t overthink it, Charlotte. My intention may be to have you all to myself, but it is also to show you what it’s like to fully let go and relax. It’s paradise, and there’s something about that particular breeze off the crystal blue water that takes away all the pretension and expectation of everyday life. You’re going to love it.”
He’s a good salesman. I’m ready to go pack my bags right now. But I do have responsibilities at work that I can’t just walk away from without proper planning.
I look at him. There’s something there, and I’m wondering what he really wants to say. Regardless, it makes my heart do flips and butterflies flutter through my stomach. Now that I’m getting used to the feeling, the one I call the Ian Effect, it doesn’t scare me as much, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t scare me at all…
A little uncomfortable, I respond with, “You have me ready to pack a bag, Ian. That sounds amazing and I’d love to go, but I have to see what’s going on at work. I can’t simply up and leave without giving my staff notice and setting up a transfer of power, so to speak. I can go in today to get a better idea of when I could make it work.”
He doesn’t know that I’ve already been setting up for some time off after all the str
ess he put me through last week. I could probably leave this evening, but I would still have to go in today to confirm everything and tie up loose ends.
“Would you think it strange if I told you I don’t want you to go into work today because I don’t want to be away from you?” Once again, he’s dead serious.
“No. I’d think it’s charming. But how else am I going to prepare for a trip to paradise?” I wink at him, hoping to take the edge off his humorless vibe.
“I guess that means you’ve had enough coffee to determine your answer is yes…you’ll go with me.” He’s smiling now, showing off those sexy dimples that melt my heart.
I can’t help but say, “Getting your way looks adorable on you, ya know.”
He lifts one brow and responds with, “Does it? A sun-kissed tan is going to look adorable on you. How long do you need to be at the office to determine when we can leave?”
Okay…guess we are back to business.
“A couple of hours, I suppose. I don’t even know what time it is.”
“It’s almost 11:30. Why don’t we get dressed, go grab some lunch, I’ll drop you off at the resort and pick you up when you’re finished.” He’s giving me a look that says, don’t argue, and at this point, I don’t because it’s one less thing for me to think about. Although, I can tell Sibel is getting antsy about Ian controlling everything. I shut her down before she says something that gets me in trouble.
Leaning forward, I whisper, “Come here.” He does, and I give him another slow kiss that has me wanting to stay here and start another marathon. “Thank you for coming over last night. I haven’t had a chance to say that yet.” I give him a few more soft kisses. “After you left the restaurant, I was a bit…distraught, I guess you could say. There is a lot that needs to be said.” I laugh over my awkwardness. “We’ve shared some intense physical passion in the past twelve hours, but not a lot of words.” I put my head down, suddenly shy.
Putting his finger under my chin, he says, “Eyes up here, gorgeous.”
The Essence of Fate Page 19
