Taking the hint, she moves on to safer ground and spends the next twenty minutes talking about the project and some of the names they’ve been throwing around. I’m only half paying attention because my focus is on Charlotte and the fact that she is having dinner with another man. I’m sure Adriana knows I’m not listening, which is why she tests me with, “So which name do you like best?”
Without missing a beat, I swallow the food in my mouth and say, “None of them. This project is going to be a showcase in one the country’s biggest and most well-known cities. The name is an important part of its brand. It needs to be perfect.”
Her jaw drops, slightly, and I find that I like dousing her overblown ego with ice water. With a somewhat bitchy attitude, she says, “That must mean you have an idea of your own for what the name should be… Spit it out, I’m dying to hear.”
Wrong again, presumptuous bitch. “Actually, I haven’t really put much thought into it. It was understood from the beginning that Novas Alturas would be naming the project, so I figured whenever you all came up with something, I’d hear about it. Now…that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have an opinion about it, and if I felt the name was awful and an insult to the magnificence of what we are creating, I’d definitely protest, but we haven’t gotten to that point.”
“Well, apparently we just did. I told you several of the names we are tossing around, and you said you don’t like any of them. So I’m curious…what would you name the project?”
I glance over at Charlotte, and my timing couldn’t be more perfect. At that moment, she looks right at me and the light over her table illuminates her eyes, accentuating their perfect blue-green color. It’s strange, because they’ve always fascinated me—not only because they are so stunningly beautiful and are the window to the only soul I’ve cared enough to love, but they had always reminded me of something. Something specific that I just couldn’t remember. I would sit and study them, sometimes draw them in hopes of figuring it out. For whatever reason, right at that moment it all fell into place…and I remembered.
The Fairy Pools on the Isle of Skye in Scotland. The mysterious, natural pools accented by majestic waterfalls that are the most incredible crystal blue or blue-green depending on the light, like Charlotte’s beautiful eyes. The thought that I’ve solved this mystery and I can’t tell her floods me with a sense of sadness.
Putting my head down for a few seconds in mock concentration, I look up at Adriana and say, “Skye…with an e.”
The look on her face changes from surprise, to defeat, to exuberance all in a matter of seconds. Her mouth widens with a smile as she says, “Ian! I love it! That is absolutely perfect!” She reaches over and grabs my hand, holding it tight. “Have you really not been thinking about this? You literally just came up with that now?”
Looking down at our clasped hands, then over to Charlotte, I see her eyes are locked on our connection. Bringing my eyes back to Adriana, I respond, “No. I haven’t put any thought into it.” Sitting back, I release her hand and continue. “Several years ago, I traveled to Scotland to visit family and decided to visit the Isle of Skye for the first time. It’s a breathtakingly pure and perfect place of beauty, and that is exactly what this project is going to be…so it seemed fitting.” I don’t mention it also seems fitting that it is an indirect connotation for the most beautiful woman that ever lived, but I doubt Adriana would be pleased to hear that side of the story.
“Well…it’s brilliant, and I’m going to push for its approval. Don’t worry, I’ll give you credit,” she says, as if I were worried I wouldn’t get the proper accolades. What she doesn’t understand is that I am not that petty. If Skye becomes the official name of the project, I would know why, and that’s all that matters.
On a chuckle, I respond, “That won’t be necessary. You take the credit. I’m sure it will make Lucas happy.” With that, I’ve decided I’m done for the evening. The weight of sitting here while Charlotte is across the room in the company of another man is making my skin hurt, and the thought of Adriana dominating me in the bedroom the way I know she wants to is making my dick go into hiding.
As if he were reading my mind through telepathy, Jackson pings my phone with a text. Looking down at it, I pretend it’s something important when he was only wondering how dinner went, assuming I was home by now. “I’m going to have to run, I’m sorry. Something has come up.”
Adriana is no dummy and knows I’m not taking her up on her repeated invitations. I suspect she knows why, as well.
But when we finally get up to leave, this already screwed up evening gets taken to new heights as Adriana squeals in excitement. “Oh my gosh! There’s Charlotte LeFay, the manager from The Clara Sea…where I’m staying! I just love her. We have to go say hello!”
You have got to be fucking kidding me. How can I get out of this? She’s practically running over to Charlotte’s table, and I have no choice but to join her. As I approach, about ten paces behind Adriana, my body turns into a live wire as it senses Charlotte’s proximity.
Adriana has Charlotte in a bear hug by the time I approach, and it’s awkward as hell. With Adriana’s back to me, I’m greeted with Charlotte’s face, front and center, her eyes closed. A sense of possession comes over me as I look at her. I want everyone in this room to disappear but Charlotte. I want to touch her, to run my nose along her hairline, and breathe in her intoxicating scent. I want to kiss her mouth, then bite her lip and gently run my tongue across the painful spot and hope I taste her blood. I want to punish her. Hold her. Take her tears between my lips.
I’m sure she can read my mind because she still hasn’t opened her eyes to look at me, and it pisses me off. “Charlotte,” I say, curt and commanding.
Her eyes pop open, making contact with mine for only a second before looking away as she pulls out of the embrace.
“You two know each other?” Adriana asks in surprise, looking back and forth between us.
Since Charlotte looks like a deer in the headlights, I answer, “Yes. We had our introductory meeting with Novas Alturas at The Clara Sea. Charlotte went out of her way to make sure we made a good impression.”
Gaining a little composure, Charlotte responds with a shaky, “Thank you, Ian, but I certainly can’t take credit for the impression you made. We provided a comfortable setting. You did the most important part.” Her eyes are doing their best to avoid me.
Adriana enthusiastically chimes in. “I just love The Clara Sea! It’s now one of my favorite resorts.” She touches Charlotte’s shoulder, brushing a lock of her hair over as she finishes with, “And I have stayed at a lot of resorts around the world.”
She’s doing her best to impress Charlotte with her compliment and being far too familiar, having only met yesterday. The thought crosses my mind that Adriana might be bisexual and is attracted to her. If so, I certainly can’t blame her, but the tension this gathering is creating inside my gut is about to make me snap. So when her dinner companion stands to introduce himself, I have to hide my hands in my pockets as they curl into tight fists.
As everyone starts talking, I have no idea what they are saying. All I know is that I’m not going to be shaking that motherfucker’s hand. Taking my phone out of my pocket, I put it up to my ear and say in a low voice, “If you’ll excuse me,” and walk out of the restaurant.
Pacing outside the front door, I wait for Adriana. When she finally arrives, she has that cat-ate-the-mouse look that says she’s done the math and is deciding what to do with the information.
“Well, that was quite a fascinating little exchange,” she gloats, hooking her arm through mine and steering us toward the parking lot.
“Oh?” I reply, not about to offer any information. Let’s see what conclusions she’s come up with.
“Had I known Charlotte LeFay was the one that got away, I would never have forced you into such a painful situation.” Her sincerity catches me off guard and I stop, turning toward her.
“And you determined that,
how?” I wonder if it was really that obvious and if the little douchebag Charlotte was with noticed it, too.
“Let’s just say that I pick up on people’s energy…very well.” She looks up at me and places her hand on my arm. “Ian. Whatever happened between the two of you needs to be resolved. I have never felt such a powerful vibration between two people. And before you jump in and tell me all the reasons why that can’t or won’t happen, just know that I know the difference between love and hate… That was pure love.” I swear her eyes look glassy, and this whole exchange is giving me chills.
“That’s very interesting, and I will take it into consideration. However, if you are so in tune with people’s vibrations, why the hell would you have ever thought I would find pleasure in being dominated by you?” Since she gave me an opening, I took it. Plus, it steers us away from my relationship with Charlotte, which is none of her business.
Throwing her head back with a deep laugh, she says, “A girl can only hope, Ian. You do happen to be one of the most attractive, desirable men I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I tried to rein it in when I sensed you weren’t having it, but you know how it goes—we are who we are…for better or worse.” She looks at me for a few long seconds, her face softening, then continues. “I would be able to set…most…of my tendencies aside if you really needed to release some of that pent-up steam. The idea of what you are capable of is doing naughty things to my libido.” Her eyes turn black and her lips part as she finishes with, “No strings attached, Ian. There’s no way I could compete with whatever you’ve got with Charlotte. But that doesn’t mean our baser needs can’t be met.”
There is a part of me that wishes I could follow through with her final invitation. My fantasy from earlier didn’t even scratch the surface of what I need right now, and I have no doubt Adriana has some tricks up her sleeve that would leave me satisfied for the next month. But I can’t, because, though I hate to admit it, the thought leaves a nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach. “Thank you for the offer and for an enjoyable evening, but it’s best that I go home alone. I’m sure you understand.”
“Of course, I do. I’m an old soul—very old, I think. I don’t get hurt feelings. But do me a favor. Figure out a way to make amends with her. Life is short and shouldn’t be wasted on petty things like pride and misunderstandings.”
“Thank you. I will think about it…I promise.”
She takes both my hands in hers and pulls me to her for a gentle kiss on my lips. Hers are soft and warm, but they feel strange to me, and her scent is too strong. The strangeness of it all distracts me, and I don’t notice Charlotte walk out of the restaurant and look straight at us until Adriana’s gasp catches my attention.
I turn to look in the same direction, and there she stands, eyes wide but her expression unclear in the darkness.
As her date walks up behind her and puts his hand on her shoulder, my spine tightens and I turn to Adriana, guiding her with me as I walk away, my hand resting low on her back right above the curve of her full, round ass. It’s a low blow, but after tonight, I really don’t give a damn.
Twenty-Nine
Charlotte
“Wow. That was intense. Are you okay?” Zane asks as we stand there watching Ian walk away with his hand resting on Adriana’s ass. Zane is Erika’s younger brother, which means he’s like a brother to me. He talked me into going out tonight so we could cry on each other’s shoulder about our breakups since Erika had a “hot date,” as she called it, and neither of us had plans to do anything else other than sit around feeling sorry for ourselves. Unfortunately, I had to cut it short since the thought of food makes me want to be sick.
“Mmmm…I definitely could have done without that. Of all the places in this massive city to eat, I pick the one that puts me face to face with exactly what I don’t want to see…Ian moving on with his life. Not even a month after we broke up.” The latter I add in a low tone, as if I’m talking to myself.
“Don’t do that to yourself, Charlotte. You don’t know for sure that they were on a date. You said she’s with the group he’s partnered with on that big project. It could have been a business dinner,” Zane says sweetly.
“No. Business associates don’t feed each other steak and hold hands at dinner. And I don’t think touching a business associate’s ass is common practice, either.” Finally reaching the safety and security of my car, we get inside and I finish with, “I’m not going to lie and pretend that didn’t hurt like hell, Zane. Because it did. But I made this bed so I have to lie in it. That doesn’t mean I’m enjoying it, though. It’s like trying to get comfortable on a mattress I picked up on the side of the road with no mattress pad and dollar store sheets.”
That’s being generous. It’s more like a bed made of glass shards. Every day I wake up and the first thought that enters my mind is that I’ve made a terrible mistake, and then I spend the rest of the day justifying my choice to set Ian free…for his own good. It’s a vicious, repetitive cycle, and it’s wearing me out.
“Oooooh…yeah, that’s bad. I can deal with the dollar store sheets, but I cannot deal with a mattress from the side of the road. That shit just freaks me out!” The look on his face is priceless, and we bust out laughing.
Zane is about as metrosexual as it gets without being gay. He is perfectly manicured, so stylish he looks like he walked out of a magazine, is super fit but not huge, with skin that looks like a baby’s. It’s funny, because he’s actually beautiful and gets hit on all the time by guys, but Zane is probably as crazy about women as his sister is about men, if not more so. The difference between the two of them is that Zane wants a commitment, and Erika does not. But Zane has too many choices and can’t make up his mind.
“Oh my God, I know! That’s why I used it in my analogy. Got the point across, didn’t it?” I say, trying to go with the flow and be normal. That’s another unfortunate part of my daily routine—pretending everything is normal when it very clearly is not.
I made up my mind that I’m going to visit my uncle James in France. I’m leaving in a few days and praying the distance, the change of scenery, and being with family will help get me back on track. Because right now, I’m barely functioning. It’s like my body is on autopilot while the real me, my soul, has gone into hibernation. It’s awful, and I simply can’t do it anymore.
Then, to add insult to my self-inflicted injury, I see Ian being affectionate with Adriana Santos, of all people! The woman is so gorgeous she looks fake, and it was all I could do to act like I wasn’t dying inside when they came up to our table. At first, I didn’t think Ian was going to come over, but then it dawned on me that Adriana had no clue Ian and I have a history together, leaving him no choice but to pretend everything was normal. Although, when I opened my eyes and looked at him for that brief moment, I could see there was nothing normal about him. The look on his face was lethal, and the vibe he was putting off made my stomach hurt. He clearly didn’t want to be there, and I was thankful when he finally walked away so I could breathe again.
Pulling up to Zane’s house, I see there’s another car in the driveway. “Whose car is that?”
Zane mumbles something then clarifies, “That would be Sophia…Leanne’s best friend.”
“Ahhh, as in Leanne that just broke up with you and that you think took a piece of your heart with her, Leanne?” I ask, somewhat shocked.
Zane’s eyes look down in embarrassment. “Yeah. Sophia’s been texting me, trying to be supportive. I didn’t think much about it, even though she was laying it on kind of thick, but now I’m starting to think maybe she wants to fuck me.” He looks up at me and waits a few seconds before his face lights up with a mischievous smile.
“You are so bad. I know exactly what you are going to do. You’re going to have revenge sex with Leanne’s best friend, aren’t you?” I’m pretending to reprimand him.
He shrugs in exaggeration. “You never know what little trinkets the universe will send your way when you need th
em. Kind of seems like bad karma coming to roost for Leanne, if you ask me.” His whole demeanor has changed from the broken-hearted man I just attempted to have dinner with to a predator looking forward to feasting on his next prey.
I hit him in the shoulder. “Get out of here, troublemaker! Text me later and give me the deets. I’m dying to know what happens.”
Leaning in to kiss my cheek, he says, “I can do better than that…I can send pics.”
“That won’t be necessary. Just be careful, Zane. I love you.” I squeeze his hand goodbye, he returns the endearment, and I’m back to my solitude.
Pre-breakup with Ian, that would have been no issue. Now…I hate being by myself. The silence makes me anxious, yet I feel so empty nothing inspires me. I don’t want to listen to music, I don’t want to read. I don’t get up for the sunrise every morning. I don’t even exercise anymore. I sincerely hope visiting Uncle James snaps me out of it, otherwise I don’t know what I’m going to do.
Three days later, I’m sitting in the airport nervously waiting to board my flight. I’m trying to occupy myself with my phone in hopes that it will calm my nerves, as my leg bounces so fast it’s literally a blur. I’ve tried to stop it, but I can’t, so I give up and let it have its way. Thankfully, Erika texts me a welcome distraction.
Erika: Hey! You doing okay? Your plane is boarding soon…right?
* * *
Me: Eh and yes.
* * *
Erika: Oh no! I told you to take some of my Valium. That’s a long flight for someone that doesn’t like to fly.
* * *
Me: I know. I should have. I’ll just have several drinks when they start serving. I wish you could have come with me. That would have really helped!
* * *
The Essence of Fate Page 30
