by M. S. Parker
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I took a step back, jerking his shirt off and tossing it at him. “You fucking bought me! I’m just doing what I was paid to come here and do. Fuck you. So, fuck you!”
He held up his hands, palms out. “Hold on, Cheyenne. I didn’t bring you here to have sex.”
I took another step back and leaned against the arm of a chair, the strength running out of my legs. “Then…what…why…why did you…?”
He came over and crouched down in front of me. His eyes stayed on my face as he took my hands in his. “I did it to protect you.”
I stared at him, unable to believe what he’d just said. “Protect me? You bought me.”
His cheeks flushed, but he didn’t look away. “Guys like Fernando, there’s only two ways to get through to them. Violence and money. If I’d tried violence, I’d probably be dead, and you’d be getting…you’d be with him.”
It was logical, and his words sounded sincere. I didn’t want to believe it though. If I believed it, then that meant he wasn’t like all the other men I knew, and I didn’t know how to handle a man who wasn’t after something.
“Come on.” He stood up and pulled me up straight. He kept hold of one of my hands as he led me down the short hallway. He pushed open a door to the left, flicked on a light, and stepped inside.
The room was plain, with only a double bed, dresser, and bedside table. No pictures, nothing personal. It was a guest room with just the necessities, which made me wonder if he ever actually expected anyone to use it.
“You really had twenty-five thousand dollars to spare?” I asked.
He released my hand and gave me a wry smile. “You’re not the only one with secrets.”
I folded my arms and glared up at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I heard some of what Fernando said to you,” he admitted. “I know he was trying to blackmail you.”
“It’s not blackmail. It’s payment.” I flushed, the misery of my situation spreading to my cheeks. “I inherited a drug debt when my mom died.” I surprised myself as much as him by the admission.
He scowled, his hands curling into fists. “Now I’m thinking maybe I should have kicked his ass.”
I shook my head. “You were right, what you said before. He would’ve killed you.”
He reached over and twisted a bit of my hair around his finger. “I’m just glad you’re safe.”
I was safe. For now. I was grateful he’d rescued me tonight, but he wasn’t going to be there all the time. Next week, when I came up short again, Fernando would either take it out of my ass himself, or he’d give me to someone else who was willing to pay for me. Someone who wouldn’t be trying to protect me.
“What’s wrong?” Slade asked, his fingers brushing my cheek.
It took everything inside me not to lean into the warmth of his hand. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not your problem.”
“Cheyenne.” His voice was firm. “Tell me.”
It was too much. Everything that’d happened over the last few days had built up inside me, and this just topped it all off. I’d spent my entire life taking care of myself, never wanting to burden anyone with what was happening in my life. And here he was, this gorgeous man who’d paid twenty-five thousand dollars to keep me safe.
“He’s going to do it again,” I said, hating myself for the tears I could feel welling up. I pushed my anger forward, letting it burn away everything else. “And it wouldn’t be so bad if…” I took a deep breath and said the words I’d never said to anyone. “I’m a virgin.”
Slade looked confused, and I didn’t blame him. I knew what people thought of me. “What?”
“I’m a virgin,” I repeated, lifting my chin. Everything else came rushing out. “And if Fernando finds out, he’s going to auction me off to the highest bidder.”
“I thought…” He shoved a hand through his hair, his confusion written all over his face. “Don’t you have a son?”
I shook my head, the relief of finally being able to tell the truth was almost overwhelming. “My mom got pregnant again when I was seventeen, but she didn’t show much. She stayed clean almost the whole pregnancy, so Fernando wasn’t around since she wasn’t buying from him. After Austin was born, she told me that we needed to tell people that he was mine. She said it was because she didn’t trust herself to stay clean and not lose custody, and she was right about that, but I think she also knew that it’d protect us both. If Fernando thought Austin was hers, he’d try and think of some way to claim him, take him away from her. If I had a kid, I’d lose that appeal.”
“Austin’s your…brother?” He ran his hand through his hair. “You’ve never…Fernando was going to…you think I…”
Somehow, the fact that he couldn’t seem to finish a sentence made me feel less frayed. I reached out and touched his arm, suddenly very aware that neither one of us were wearing shirts now. I let myself look at him, at the muscles and tattoos. At the cross over his heart, the initials CH, ASH, and AH on the crossbeam, and a date underneath. The chain went over his shoulder, and I wanted to turn him around, so I could see what it led to on his back. I wanted to see everything.
He pulled me to him, the speed of the movement startling me, but I felt no panic, no fear. His arms wrapped around me, engulfing me completely, and all I felt was safe and warm.
Fifteen
Slade
My heart was pounding, but I wasn’t sure if it was because of the enormity of what Cheyenne had shared with me, or because I was now overly aware of bare skin against bare skin. I didn’t think it was my imagination making me feel the hard points of her nipples through the thin lace of her bra either.
I needed to let her go before I completely embarrassed myself.
But first…
“I won’t let him hurt you.”
That was dangerously close to admitting that I felt something for her that I shouldn’t, but she needed to know that she was protected.
She moved, but not away. Instead, she turned her head and pressed her mouth to my chest. I froze.
“Cheyenne.”
She tilted her head back, letting me see her face. “I can’t have this hanging over my head. Wondering if he’ll finally figure it out.”
I really hoped she wasn’t suggesting what it sounded like. I wasn’t sure I had the strength to refuse her.
“I’ll do anything for my brother, but I want this, at least, to be my choice. I need it to be my choice.”
I held her shoulders and moved her away from me as gently as possible. I couldn’t think straight with her that close.
“Oh.” Color flooded her face, splashed across her chest. She looked away. “I’m sorry. I thought…I just read you wrong.”
It would have been smarter, kinder even, to apologize and let that be how we ended the night. But I wasn’t strong enough to do what was right. Not when it meant she’d leave here in the morning believing that I hadn’t wanted her from the moment I first saw her.
“You didn’t.” The words were so quiet that I almost thought I imagined saying them.
She looked at me, a guarded expression on her face.
“When I kissed you,” I continued, “I did it because I wanted you then, and I still want you now.”
“Then why…” She turned away again. “Never mind.”
“No.” The word sounded harsher than I meant it, but I needed her to understand. I took a step toward her. “Not never mind. Ask me. Ask me anything, and I promise to tell you the truth.”
She turned back and jutted out her jaw. “Fine. Tell me why you don’t want to fuck me.”
Well, that was blunt.
I returned the favor. “I want to fuck you, Cheyenne. Knowing I’d be your first…I can’t even tell you how badly I want it. I just don’t want to hurt you.”
She closed the distance between us, her eyes locked with mine, and put her hand on my chest. “You won’t.”
If she only knew how closely desire and pain
were linked for me, she wouldn’t trust me.
“My mother was a prostitute,” she said evenly. “I have no delusions about how sex works and what it means. What it would mean with you.”
I put my hand over hers. “What would it mean with me?”
“It would mean that I’m choosing someone who put himself on the line to protect me. Someone I’m asking to protect me again, just in a different way.”
How the hell was I supposed to tell her no after that?
“Two things,” I said. “The first is, I need you to communicate with me. I don’t want to do this if you aren’t going to participate.” She nodded. “The second is a question I need you to answer. When I kissed you before, was it your first real kiss?”
Her porcelain skin flushed again as she nodded, leaving her head bowed.
I hooked a finger under her chin and raised her head until she was looking at me. “I’m sorry, Chey.” I lowered my head and gently pressed my lips to hers. I made the kiss slow and sweet before ending it. “That should have been your first kiss.”
She smiled, and it lit up her entire face. I took advantage of the moment and swung her up into my arms.
“What–?”
“My bedroom’s in there,” I explained as I carried her across the hall. “Along with the condoms.”
She laughed, the surprised look on her face telling me that she didn’t do it often enough. I set her down on the edge of the bed and then went to my knees in front of her. I was a Dominant, but I leaned more toward sadistic and didn’t mind appearing submissive. Tonight, however, all of that took a backseat to making sure I proved to Cheyenne that she hadn’t made a mistake by trusting me.
I helped her remove the rest of her clothes, revealing a lithe body that sent every Dom instinct in me to war. Pale skin that would show every mark, that already showed a pair of bruises on her arm from where Fernando had grabbed her. Half of me wanted to kill Fernando for hurting her, but the other half wanted to hurt her myself, teach her that there was a kind of pain that could bring the most exquisite pleasure. I simultaneously wanted to push her to the limit and shelter her.
I ran my hands up her legs until I reached her hips. I pulled her closer to the edge of the bed and eased her legs over my shoulders. She fell back against the bed, then pushed herself up on her elbows so she could watch. I kissed the inside of one thigh, then the other, smiling as I heard her catch her breath.
Tonight, was about her, but I didn’t doubt for a moment that I was going to enjoy this just as much as she would.
I turned my attention to the soft, sensitive flesh between her legs and ran my tongue over it in one long lick. She made a small sound, her body twitching. I smiled again and then proceeded to give her another first kiss, dipping my tongue inside her.
“Oh, wow!”
Her fists hit the bed as her back arched, pushing her pussy against my mouth. I didn’t need any additional encouragement to go deeper, to hold her tighter. When I moved up to finally find that neglected bundle of nerves, her heels thumped against my back.
“Slade!” A tremor ran through her entire body.
I did it again, wanting to hear her say my name, feel her body respond. My cock was already rock hard, and I had a feeling that if I stayed down here much past a single orgasm, I’d come in my pants like some damn high schooler.
I flicked the tip of my tongue against her clit, then rubbed the flatter part over it, alternating between the two faster and faster until she let out a hoarse cry, her thighs clamping down on either side of my head. I let her ride it out, waiting until her body went limp before I untangled myself and stood.
I watched her shudder on the bed, her skin heated and beautiful as I finished undressing myself. I breathed a sigh of relief as the pressure on my cock was removed. I planned on a bit more foreplay, knowing I needed to be as careful as possible in preparing her, but I still pulled a condom out of my bedside drawer and tossed it on the bed. By the time I was certain she was ready for me, I wouldn’t want to take the time to dig up protection.
I climbed up on the bed, allowing myself the enjoyment of looking at Cheyenne, her eyes half-closed, mouth open slightly. Her nipples were two hard little points, her breasts small but firm. As I settled on her right side, her eyes opened, and I caught a flash of fear before she pulled her shields back up. She spread her legs, the invitation clear.
“Not yet,” I said with a smile. “I won’t lie and say it won’t hurt at all, but I’ll do my best to make sure it’s as little pain as possible.”
That might have been the first time I’d ever said those words.
“Thank you,” she said, her smile strangely shy considering what had just passed between us.
I leaned over her and brushed my lips across hers, unsure how comfortable she’d be with a kiss after where my mouth had just been. I shouldn’t have worried. She reached up to wrap an arm around my neck, taking the kiss deeper than the others as she parted her lips.
My tongue slid across hers as I cupped her breast, moving my thumb back and forth across her nipple until she was moaning into my mouth. I took her bottom lip between my teeth, worrying it as I ran my hand down her stomach to the slick flesh between her legs.
I pushed my middle finger inside her, my cock jerking at the molten heat scorching my skin. It was going to take every ounce of self-control I possessed to last once I was inside her.
As I eased my finger deeper, she buried her fingers in my hair, nails scratching against my scalp. Her muscles tensed as I started working my finger in and out, and I shifted my hand, putting my thumb in position to move over her swollen clit.
“Ahh…” Her eyelids fluttered as her head fell back.
Her muscles unclenched, and I worked my index finger inside her as well. I didn’t have a lot of experience with virgins, but I did know a trick or two. I covered her breast with my mouth, circling her smooth skin with my tongue before focusing in on her nipple. As my fingers reached her hymen, I bit down on her nipple and pushed my fingers past the thin barrier.
She let out a pained cry, her entire body tightening. I raised my head, my thumb making soft circles around her clit.
“Shh,” I soothed her and kissed the corner of her mouth. “It’s okay. You’re okay. Relax, Chey. I’ll make you feel good, I promise.”
Her eyes met mine, and she nodded. Little by little, she relaxed again, and I was able to resume the steady strokes of my fingers until all signs of discomfort were gone, and she was ready.
Sixteen
Cheyenne
His fingers breaking my hymen hadn’t been pleasant, but I’d seen the size of his penis, and I was glad he’d taken the time to do things that way. In my head, I’d known he was bigger than me, but our size difference hadn’t really hit me until now, when he was kneeling between my legs, rolling a condom over that massive cock of his.
How in the hell was that going to fit?
“Chey,” he said my name quietly, as if he was concerned I was going to bolt. “If you don’t want to do this, it’s okay.”
I smiled at him, my body pleasantly buzzing again. I’d feel it in the morning, but I wasn’t about to back down now.
I held out a hand, and he took it, allowing me to pull him forward until his body loomed over mine, only a few inches between us. He put his hand on my cheek, keeping himself propped up on one arm as he lowered his head to kiss me. I could feel his desire, feel how badly he wanted me, but he didn’t rush. He poured all his focus into the kiss even as his hand slid down my body to wrap around the back of my thigh, lifting my leg and opening me up to him even more.
As the tip of his cock bumped against my entrance, I waited for the nerves, for the fear that I’d always imagined would come when I finally took this step.
But all I felt was a deep, throbbing need that I knew wouldn’t be met until he was inside me.
He took it slow, his eyes on my face, constantly searching for any sign of discomfort or pain. I stretched around him, wider th
an I would have thought possible, and the feeling of fullness hovered on the border between what I could and couldn’t handle.
Time faded as our hips rocked together, allowing him to withdrawal, then move forward a little deeper. Back and forth as we breathed the same air, sweat-slicked skin slipping and sliding, our bodies joining in a way that should have been impossible. Everything about this was impossible, from who we were to all the things that made us different, but in this moment, we still existed. We chased the white-hot ecstasy that threatened to burn us both, and when we finally exploded together, I realized that nothing was ever going to be the same again.
I didn’t remember falling asleep, but I must have because the last thing I remembered was Slade and I collapsing into a sweaty heap. After that, nothing until I woke up this morning.
I was disoriented at first, which was understandable since I hadn’t woken up in a strange place since before Austin was born. Back then, Mom and I had moved from one trashy apartment to the next, but when she found out she was pregnant again, she’d gotten us into the place we were now. Not great, but miles better than some of those other buildings.
I rolled over, but the other side of the bed was empty. I smoothed down the sheets that were still rumpled from Slade’s body. Heat flooded every inch of me as the memory of him flashed to the front of my mind. My fingers itched for paper and pencil to draw the strong lines of his body as if I could recreate the feel of him.
I didn’t know what to do now. I’d never done the ‘morning after’ thing. It was weirder than I’d thought it would be.
I was lying in a stranger’s bed. Naked. My skin had that annoying clammy feeling that came with having gone to sleep sweaty, and now that I was taking inventory, I realized the insides of my thighs and between my legs felt gross. I was also sore, but as soon as I’d seen how big Slade was, I’d known that couldn’t be avoided. My nipples were sensitive too, and I flushed as I remembered how he’d sucked and bitten them.
