by A. L. Moore
She chuckled, giving me a shove and hugging her pillow. “Cole has the most beautiful eyes. Did you see his eyes?” she asked, reaching for her phone. “And he’s so funny. He’ll have you rolling on the floor, Justice; I swear. He doesn’t even try. Everything he says is just hilarious.
“You do think he’s cute. Right?” It shouldn’t matter what I thought, but I knew it did. If I didn’t like him, she would find something she didn’t like about him. I’d seen it happen before. Of course, that had happened with guys in movies, but I knew Anna well enough to know this would not be any different.
“I told you I did,” I said encouragingly. “He looks a lot like Mitchell Morgan. Don’t you think?” Mitchell Morgan was the class president and head of the golf team at school. He was a blonde god to most girls.
“Ugh, Mitchell Morgan,” she groaned. “Cole is way cuter than that.”
After being around Jayson and Liam last night, Cole really looked like a goofy kid to me.
She pulled up a picture of Cole in paint splattered board shorts, holding a red ice chest. “You can’t tell me he’s not gorgeous.”
His stomach was shapeless, not at all like the set of abs Jayson flashed in Robyn’s bedroom last night. I imagined if I knocked into Cole’s chest as I had Liam’s, my arm wouldn’t still be sore.
“He’s got a great tan,” I said, improvising. “Were you guys out in the sun a lot?”
“What do you think?” She deadpanned, showing off the line from her bikini top. “The weather was absolutely perfect. It didn’t rain once. I wish you would’ve come with me. Cole had a friend named Chase that would’ve been perfect for you.”
“Mason. Remember?” I shook the charm bracelet Mason gave me for my birthday. Even the jingling clank of metal made me feel guilty.
Anna hit me with a throw pillow. “You know what I mean. You and Chase had a lot in common. I’m not saying you should’ve made out with him or anything. You know I’d never condone cheating on Mason.”
“Did you make out with Cole?” I said quickly, already knowing the answer, but also knowing this would change her line of thinking. If she kept talking about Mason and cheating, I was going to spill.
Her cheeks flushed crimson. “You know I don’t kiss and tell,” she giggled.
“You don’t lie either!” I said, rolling my eyes. “How far did it go?”
She grew exceptionally quiet, her eyes focused on the blanket in her lap. Anna was never quiet when it came to boys. If she kissed someone, we talked about it for hours. When she got felt up at homecoming last fall, the retelling was a weekend event.
“Anna! You didn’t!”
“Do you think that makes me a slut?” she asked, covering her face with the pillow.
We’d always talked badly about the girls who’d been having sex since middle school, but they were different. For one, they weren’t my best friend, and two, they were sluts. This was Anna. Anna wasn’t a slut.
“I guess not,” I said, stunned.
Anna had never had a steady boyfriend. I was the girl with the boyfriends, or at least the boyfriend. I’d always thought I would be first. As irrational as it was, I couldn’t stop the jealousy burning in my gut. I pushed those thoughts down deep inside and concentrated on Anna. This was a huge deal for her.
“Do you love him?” I asked.
“I know it sounds crazy because I’ve only known him a week,” she said, peeking over the top of the pillow, “but I think I do. Every time I think about him my stomach flutters, and I feel like I can’t breathe. Are you like that with Mason?”
I nodded. It was easier to lie than go into the truth. “What made you sure you wanted to sleep with him?” I asked perplexed. I’d thought about it several times with Mason, but not to the point where I was brave enough to go there.
“Remember,” Anna paused. “You said I wasn’t a slut.” I nodded waiting for a divine revelation. “I knew the first time he kissed me,” she gushed.
Funny, I knew the moment Tyler kissed me that I’d never eat chocolate covered peanuts again.
“Wow that must’ve been some kiss.”
Anna laid back dramatically on the bed and closed her eyes. “You don’t know the half of it.” I settled back for the details. Anna had packed more action into the first week of summer break than I had in sixteen summers combined. “My knees trembled, and my heart raced. I had chill bumps, Justice! In one-hundred-degree weather, I had freaking chill bumps. Can you imagine? Have you ever felt like that?” She paused when I sent my ringing phone to voicemail.
“Wasn’t that Mason’s ring tone?” she asked, curiously leaning over to see the screen.
“Yes, but he can wait. I want to know everything,” I insisted, pushing down the guilt that gnawed at my insides. “Don’t leave out a single detail.” That was all the encouraging she needed to continue.
“We were at my parents’ condo when it happened,” she started back. “They’d gone out to play miniature golf.”
“They just left you alone with him?” I asked skeptically. Her hovering parents were every bit as strict as mine.
“He came over after they left,” she said, rolling her eyes as if this bit of information should’ve been obvious.
“Who started it?”
“I guess we both sort of did,” she admitted. “We were watching a movie, started kissing, and just didn’t stop.”
We both lay quietly, staring at the glow-in-the-dark star stickers on her ceiling. Anna wasn’t a virgin. I gave her an elbow to the ribs. “I can’t believe you did it before me.”
“Me either,” she squealed, pressing her hands between her knees.
“How’d you know what to do?” I asked, propping onto my elbow.
Her curls fanned out in all directions around her face. The shoulders of her shirt were wet from her hair. She was lost in thought for a full minute before answering. “I didn’t.”
“Had he done it before?”
“I don’t know,” she said as if the thought had never occurred to her. “He must’ve, because he definitely knew what he was doing.”
“Didn’t you ask him?” Surely, she’d asked him. Anna wasn’t a moron.
She looked at me like I was missing a screw. “I kind of had other things on my mind at the moment.” What was more mind consuming than catching an STD or getting pregnant?
“Aren’t you scared you could catch something?” I said under my breath.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she rolled her eyes. “It’s not like we didn’t use something.”
“Oh, right,” I said. “I guess I wasn’t thinking about that.” According to Mrs. Gregg in Health Education, unless she’d used a chastity belt, she could still get pregnant.
“I’m not stupid, Justice,” she said annoyed.
“Anna, I didn’t mean to…” I started to apologize.
“We didn’t talk about other people,” she cut me off, tears glistening in her brown eyes. “I don’t even know if he has a girlfriend.” Her hands were starting to shake. “What if he has a girlfriend?”
“You’re jumping to conclusions,” I said, stroking her auburn curls. “Call him and ask before you have a break down.”
“I can’t ask him THAT over the phone,” she said, panicked. “He’s coming over this weekend. I’ll ask him then.”
“He’s coming over this weekend?” I asked surprised. “How long is the drive?”
She wiped her eyes and combed through her hair. “Less than an hour…the way he drives.
“Why do you sound so surprised?” she asked. “Do you think it’s too soon for him to come over?”
“It’s not that,” I said, plastering on what I hoped was a reassuring smile. She looked like she was going to blow a gasket. “I was just thinking, if he had a girlfriend, he wouldn’t be free to drive up here his first weekend back home.”
“You think?”
I pulled her close. “Definitely.” Anna smiled hugely, drying her eyes. “Without a doubt,” I continu
ed, to lift her spirits. “He’s only been home two days. If he had a girlfriend, she wouldn’t let him take off again so soon. I know I’d kill Mason.”
She put the hairbrush on the dresser and settled back on the bed. “Thanks, Justice. I felt like I was going to pass out there for a minute. You never told me love was like this. I feel like I’m on a roller coaster.”
I didn’t know love was like that. I didn’t remember it being like that with Mason, not even at the beginning. Of course, we were fourteen when we got together.
“If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell anyone, especially Mason?” I asked, staring a hole through her carpet.
Anna moved in like a lion ready to pounce, her serious face in place. “I swear,” she said, suddenly jumping to her feet. “Did you do it with Mason?”
“No,” I said quickly, grabbing her arm before she could start cabbage-patching. “I kissed someone else.”
Her eyes grew like I’d just peeled off my face.
“You cheated on Mason,” she said dumbstruck, all the excitement draining from her face. “With who? Why?”
“Trust me. You don’t know him. He’s older,” I whispered. I couldn’t afford for her mom to hear this conversation. She’d beat me herself. “He’s a friend of Robyn’s, and I didn’t plan it.”
“Raunchy Robyn?” Anna scowled.
I’d forgotten we used to call Robyn that. Anna came up with the name after Robyn dumped Anna’s cousin and then made out with another guy the same night, in front of my house. Robyn was one of the sluts we talked about.
“Don’t call her that. She’s nice,” I insisted.
“Woah,” Anna said, holding up her hand as if stopping traffic. “Step back. Have I entered some alternate universe? Since when do you hang out with Robyn?”
I knew she’d react this way. I stood up and started pacing the room. “Look, I’ve been working with her at the store, and she’s not half bad. Really.” Who cared about Robyn? She wasn’t the point. “Whatever. It doesn’t matter,” I locked eyes with Anna and mouthed, “He drives a bike.”
“That’s okay, I guess,” she said oblivious. “He probably doesn’t have his license yet.”
“You girls hungry?” Anna’s Mom asked, sticking her head around the corner of the doorframe. “I made tuna salad.”
“Gross,” Anna said, pretending to gag. “That smells like someone already digested it.”
“No thanks,” I said, listening impatiently for her to walk away.
“Not a bicycle, you dork! He drives a motorcycle.”
Anna quickly peered down the hall after her mom and locked the door. “Shut up! You got on a motorcycle?” She said it like I’d robbed a bank at gun point.
“You had sex,” I reminded her dryly.
“I know, but you don’t even cheat on tests.”
“Not everyone cheats on tests,” I pointed out.
“Everyone with a cell phone cheats on tests,” she said shaking her head.
I stared out the window debating. It wasn’t that long ago that Anna and I had been kids playing on her front lawn, and guys like Tyler hadn’t noticed us no matter how hard we tried to get their attention. They certainly noticed now, and I didn’t know if that was a good thing. I wasn’t sure if I should tell Anna about Liam. Not that there was anything to tell, but I felt guiltier about him than I did about Tyler. I’d stayed up half the night thinking about Liam. No one had ever looked at me like he did, as if I was more than Little Justice Asher, or Mason’s girlfriend.
“So, what was the ride like? Anna asked, hugging her knees to her chest like she was watching a good movie. Were you scared?”
“It was uncomfortable,” I said, trying to picture the ride without Tyler. I wasn’t sure if it was the ride or him that made it that way.
“It wasn’t exciting at all?” She asked disappointed.
“It was just so awkward having to hold on to that guy.”
“You don’t like him?”
“I don’t really know him.”
“Then why in the world did you get on his bike?” she demanded.
“Robyn,” I sighed. “She set the whole thing up before I could say a word.”
Anna opened her mouth to say something but quickly snapped it shut and asked, “Was the guy at least cute?” Everything always came down to looks with her.
“He wasn’t ugly,” I said, trying not to think about Tyler. When I thought about him, I could almost taste his breath in my mouth. “The whole thing was just weird.”
Anna hesitated, clearly uncomfortable. “Are you going to tell Mason?”
“Are you crazy?” I had her arm in a death grip so fast she nearly fell. “He would freak.”
“Maybe not, it sounds like you didn’t do anything wrong,” she pulled my fingers away and rubbed her reddening arm. “You can’t help that some strange guy kissed you. I think you should tell him.
This was not the reaction I’d hoped for. “You promised, Anna!” I reminded her.
“I didn’t say I was going to tell him,” she said quickly. “I just think you should. It’s Robyn’s fault after all. At least now you know how she is. Though, I could’ve told you that before.” She gave me a meaningful glance. “Actually, I think I did.”
Anna didn’t get it, but how could she. She didn’t know all the facts. Besides, if I told Mason about Robyn, he wouldn’t want me to go back over to her house anymore. Despite everything, I wanted to go back. I was going back.
Chapter 6. Silenced
It was a relief to work without Robyn. I hadn’t decided if I was still angry with her for abandoning me on a desolated highway with Tyler. Not to mention that she hadn’t once checked in to make sure I’d made it home. I could be dead in a ditch somewhere for all she knew. An apology would’ve been nice, and it wasn’t like she hadn’t been home. I’d seen Jayson’s bike in her drive last night
I started removing yoyos from the display Mr. Smith set out front this morning. Not one of them sold. Kids didn’t play with yoyos anymore, not unless there was an App. for one. I slid the box inside the door and grabbed the pressboard just as thundering engines roared behind me. It was Alec and Liam. I recognized Alec only because of the shiny silver bike. A long sleeved, black riding jacket covered the beautiful mosaic on his arms. He and Liam glanced in my direction as they turned into the alley, disappearing behind the store. I scanned the empty sidewalk before slipping over to the mouth of the alley for a closer look. I stopped dead in my tracks before ever landing eyes on Liam. Another bike was quickly approaching. Its steady hum rattled my brain in a familiar way. I dashed back to the store, not stopping until I was safely hidden behind the sunglasses’ display.
Tyler’s eyes never strayed from the road. Maybe I was making too much of our little ride. After all, Tyler said Robyn had clued him in about Mason. Maybe he'd thought he was doing her a favor by taking me out, and Robyn probably thought she was helping me.
“Justice?” Mr. Smith asked concerned. I was still crouched behind a line of Aviator frames. “I’m going to take the trash out, and we’ll call it a night.” Pausing at the door he asked, “Is everything okay?”
“Oh, yeah. Everything’s great,” I said, straightening the reading glasses. I started to the register, giving him what I hoped was a convincing smile.
It wasn’t like I could tell him I was hiding out from a motorcycle gang. He would surely tell my parents. Adults had pacts about that kind of information. Right?
“Go ahead and empty your register,” he tossed over his shoulder.
Grabbing the overflowing trash bags, he disappeared out the door. I wiped the counter down and put the stacks of tens and twenties in the bank bag with the rest of the change. I had no choice but to stick the loot under the register. Mr. Smith hadn’t given me the safe combination yet, and I was too anxious to get out the door to bother asking for it. I turned the lights off, hoping the couple headed my way would take the hint. Four people had jiggled the door handle since I’d l
ocked it. It was silly to take their scowls personally, but I couldn’t help it. I walked around the store again killing time and making sure I hadn’t missed anything. The drink barrels were empty, the back sinks still filled with melting ice. The candy barrels were brimming at the top, and every clothes hanger had a finger-sized space between it and the next one. Perfection. Forget college. I could easily run a store single-handed.
Mr. Smith still wasn’t back after my inspection, so I took his keys from the counter and locked the stock room. Sneaking a peek out the door, I could clearly see the trash in the dumpster, but he was gone. Heavy rock music thumbed along the alleyway, giving the bikes parked there a more menacing quality. The door across the way was open again, and I could hear Mr. Smith’s voice over the heavy drum bass. I moved closer, keeping to the shadows that danced along the pavement.
“Is everything here?” Mr. Smith asked.
“It’s all here,” Tyler said. “I had Alec and Liam go back through the boxes again last night.”
I could hear boxes being shuffled around as I inched closer to the bright opening.
“Who’s meeting Marco tonight?” Mr. Smith asked.
“Jayson,” Tyler said without missing a beat.
“Do you really think that’s the best idea,” Mr. Smith sighed. “He just got out.”
“It’ll be cool,” Jayson spoke up. “I need to clear the air with Marco anyway. Besides, I’ve got it under control.”
“If he screws up…”
“He won’t,” Tyler insisted, interrupting Mr. Smith.
I froze when I saw a black boot reach the edge of the doorframe. I was too far into the alley to get back to the store. Mr. Smith started when he caught sight of me, running his hand over the length of his face. His lips mashed together in a hard line as he stared me down.
“I just wanted to let you know the store is locked,” I said. “If it’s okay with you, I’m going to head out.”
“Fine,” he said, glancing behind him.
I couldn’t leave with him mad at me. I didn’t want him to think I was eavesdropping. “Mr. Smith,” I said, spinning back on my heels. “If you ever need extra help delivering, my friend Anna has a car, and I would be glad to help out.”
