Paige tucks her hair behind her ears, not seeming to notice the red roses still tangled in her dark tresses. “So you want to resurrect Gaia to save the world.”
“Yeah,” I say. “And to save you.”
“Really? Why would you care if I died?”
“Are you serious?” I can feel my muscles tense at the thought of her lifeless body. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”
“Why not?” she asks. “Please be as specific as possible.”
“Because,” I start, before I realize what’s happening.
A small smile is tugging at the corners of her lips, and she’s trying not to laugh.
She’s fucking with me.
It would have worked, too. I was about to be torn between confessing everything I feel for her and maintaining enough distance not to scare her off. Even the most emotionally aware of men couldn’t have struck a balance without faltering. I’m a demigod and I would have failed miserably.
Paige catches the shift in my expression and realizes I’ve figured her out.
And then she gives me the brightest smile I’ve seen yet.
“All right.” She climbs out of the reading nook and straightens her skirt. “I hope you know that what you’re saying sounds insane. And I really hate that you can’t resurrect anyone other than Gaia. But based on everything I’ve seen today, I think I believe you.” The smile slides from her face. “Which is why I have to show you something.”
My eyes follow Paige as she switches on a lamp behind the register and kneels down beside a filing cabinet, searching through the drawers. Even without her sitting right next to me, I can’t seem to draw a single breath without inhaling her strawberry scent. The urge to kiss her is so strong I almost get up and join her.
The fantasy plays out in my mind.
I’ll slide my arms around her from behind, my lips caressing her neck.
She’ll gasp as she feels my arousal against her.
I’ll slide her sleeve away and kiss her bare shoulder.
I’ll whisper to her exactly how beautiful she is before kissing the lobe of her ear.
And then I’ll lift her onto the filing cabinet and slide her panties aside and kiss her there, too.
I want her.
I want all of her—
Fuck. Fuck. What the hell has this girl done to me? I shouldn’t be fueling my attraction to Paige like this. I need to be able to walk away from her after I find The Goddess Codex. I need to be able to leave this place and accept that our paths only converged for a brief moment in time.
No matter how badly I want Paige, my love is and has always been reserved for Gaia. After I resurrect the goddess, I’ll be doing everything in my power to make things right. I already failed her once, and I can’t fail her again.
No one else can factor into that. Ever.
Not even a human girl who overwhelms every part of me.
Paige doesn’t even want me, anyway. She wants whoever died in that fire. So I’ll just have to maintain my distance and pretend I feel nothing for her. I already have enough guilt to deal with for a lifetime, which means she can’t mean anything to me. I can’t mean anything to her.
And above all else, we definitely can’t have sex again.
Easy. Right?
Chapter Seven
Paige
I walk over to Aidan in the bookstore, carrying a thick binder in my arms. He’s leaning against a wooden table with his arms crossed, and his brow is furrowed as if something’s wrong. Part of me wants to ask if he’s okay, but that would just feel like another betrayal of Summer.
I already can’t stop thinking about how Aidan felt inside me.
It doesn’t help that I’m way more attracted to him than I should be. His golden hair is still intertwined with fragrant grass, and my fingers are practically itching to tangle in the strands again.
But it doesn’t matter how hot he is, or how honest and sincere he appears to be.
This is all that can ever happen between us.
“We need to talk,” Aidan says to me.
“Isn’t that what we’re doing?” I set down the binder, avoiding his gaze. “Just look inside, Aidan.”
After a second, he turns to the binder and flips it open. I watch as he thumbs through the contents: old newspaper clippings, obscure textbook photocopies, pseudoscientific magazine articles, notations from library catalogs around the world...
They all discuss a mythological goddess who created a codex.
The Goddess Codex.
“What the hell is this?” Aidan asks. Now that he’s realized what he’s looking at, his jaw is tightly clenched. “You told me you’d never heard of The Goddess Codex. You acted like you had no idea what I was talking about. And yet you seem to know quite a bit, Paige.” His voice has taken on a growling tone that sounds vaguely like a dragon’s roar. “You lied to me.”
“I never lied to you,” I say defensively. “I only said The Goddess Codex didn’t exist, and I was right. If you look at the evidence, it’s just another legendary object from mythology, like Excalibur or the Golden Fleece.”
“This isn’t evidence,” he says impatiently. “This is humankind’s attempt to make sense of a powerful magical artifact that’s appeared again and again in its history. How exactly did you hear about The Goddess Codex?”
I hesitate, not sure how to explain it in a way that doesn’t sound insane. “I was given a prophecy by a fortuneteller. She said, ‘A man will ask you for a codex belonging to a goddess. If you go with him, you will die—’”
Aidan abruptly releases the binder and moves toward me. I instinctively start to back away, but he reaches out and frames my face with a hand.
“I would never hurt you, Paige,” he says, the growl fading from his voice. “And you’re not about to die. Not if I have anything to say about it.”
I gaze up into his eyes, my heart beating hard and fast. He’s so close I can’t seem to breathe in anything other than his grassy scent. His thumb gently traces the curve of my jaw as my body practically aches for more.
But I wasn’t supposed to get this close to him again.
I wasn’t supposed to let anything else happen between us.
Aidan must have noticed my expression, because he drops his hand and turns away. “Your fortuneteller could have been one of Jasper’s minions in human form. Or a human corpse reanimated to be under his control.” He glances at the storefront window. “I need to teach you a few basic spells before Jasper attacks again.”
I almost laugh in his face. The concept of magic seemed so real earlier, when I was kneeling in my apartment overgrown with wildflowers. When I was being electrocuted from the inside out, I would have believed in anything.
Even magic.
Now, in the empty aisles of the bookstore, I’m starting to doubt its existence entirely. I should go back to my apartment and call Willow instead of remaining this close to some guy who claims to be a demigod. He hasn’t even proven he can turn into a dragon. What reason do I have to believe he can teach me magic like freaking Merlin, much less resurrect someone?
But Aidan’s expression fades any trace of laughter from my lips. “Just look outside, Paige.”
When I turn to the storefront window, the glass is obscured by an intricate pattern of frost.
Four words have been spelled out in beautiful, swirling cursive.
Come to me, Paige.
Aidan says something to me, but I can’t hear him.
Come to me, Paige.
As if drawn forward by a magnetic force, I find myself moving to the window in a dreamlike state, the temperature sinking with every step I take.
By the time I reach the frosted glass, I’m shivering violently.
Come to me, Paige.
Outside the bookstore, the streetlamps have been extinguished and the only illumination is from a snow-curtained moon. Everything appears lifeless and gray, as if the way I’ve been experiencing the world without Summer has somehow becom
e reality.
I flatten my palm against the glass.
A bitter cold carves deep into my flesh.
In my mind’s eye, I can see the winter dragon soaring above a snowy landscape. He’s searching for something. Or someone. As I watch, he swivels an ice blue eye in my direction, as if magically detecting my presence.
He winks at me.
The sensation of pure evil spikes into my veins, as if I’m being pierced by a thousand icicles.
Something wicked is coming.
I stumble back from the window, gasping for air. I think Aidan is behind me, but I’ve lost all sense of space and time. It feels like I’m drowning in a lake at the height of winter and the surface has frozen solid above me.
A glittering layer of frost has spread across my skin.
I have the bad feeling that if I don’t do something about it, I really will drown.
But even as I part my lips to plead for help, a warm mouth finds mine, breathing electricity into my veins.
No, not electricity.
What did Aidan call it?
Lightstorm.
The magic is thawing me, bringing back my memories of Summer and Willow and everyone else I’ve ever loved. It’s reminding me that the world is made of color and light, not darkness or evil.
I know where I am now.
I’m standing in the Dragon’s Tale with my back against a frosted window. I’m living in a world where magic really exists. It’s after midnight in the middle of June, and a blizzard is raging outside.
And Aidan is kissing me.
He’s breathing lightstorm through my lips, undoing whatever was being done to me.
But his scent reminds me so achingly of Summer I can’t stand another second of it.
I slide my hands in between us, shoving him away from me.
We break apart, neither of us looking at the other.
“Corpus medicatum.” Aidan isn’t acknowledging what just happened, though a muscle is tensed in his jaw. “If you want the ability to heal yourself, that’s the first spell you need to learn.”
“No,” I say, backing away from him. “This was a mistake. I can’t find The Goddess Codex, and you can’t resurrect a human. We’re of no use to each other. You need to leave.”
“Corpus medicatum,” Aidan repeats, reaching out and catching my arm. His touch on my skin makes me in ache in places I don’t want to acknowledge right now. “Please, Paige. Either learn to speak magic or come with me to the Summer Realm.”
“Are you trying to kidnap me again?”
“No!” He releases my arm and shakes his head. “I’m trying to protect you from Jasper. Do you understand what he could do to you? Just learn three spells and I’ll go.”
“You’ll leave?” I think I can hear cruel laughter in the distance.
“Cross my heart and hope to die.” He’s completely serious.
“Fine,” I say. “Whatever. Corpus medicatum!”
Nothing happens.
Aidan frowns. “You might have to use an object from nature as a focus.”
I make a face. “What kind of magic is this? Are you secretly just a Wiccan?”
A wry smile twists his lips. “Are you asking me to lie to you?” He reaches up and plucks a red rose from my hair. “Here. Try this.”
My hand closes around the flower, crushing its soft petals.
Where did it even come from?
I take a deep breath. “Corpus medicatum.”
The red rose instantly dissolves into my skin. At the same time, I feel a glowing fire erupt in my core, beautiful and powerful and terrifying all at once. Without warning, it sears throughout my entire body, trying to unlock something in my heart I didn’t even realize was there until now. Something that was supposed to remain hidden.
I instinctively know I shouldn’t have been taught this spell or anything else related to magic.
I’m burning from the inside out.
Please, a voice whispers in my head. I miss him so much.
Without thinking, I reach up and kiss Aidan again.
He’s already kissing me back before I realize what’s happening. As I gasp against his mouth, he backs me into a bookshelf and shows me exactly why we had sex earlier. His tongue deepens our kiss as he presses hard into my thigh. Everywhere his fingers touch my skin, it feels like my flesh is bursting into flames. I want his hand to slide up my skirt again. I want anything at all to bring him closer to me.
But just as I’m allowing myself to admit that I want a man who isn’t Summer again, he pulls himself away and clenches his hand into a fist.
“I can’t do this anymore.” Aidan’s eyes are poorly concealing a battle between desire and guilt. “I can’t be around you.”
“Why?” I hate that my voice is trembling. “Because of Gaia?”
He hesitates for a split second, and that’s all I need to know. He’ll never care about me the way he cared about her. And even if I’ll never care about anyone the way I cared about Summer, it hurts more than it should.
It hurts like hell.
The magic inside my blood is transforming into a firestorm of pure rage. If Aidan hadn’t come looking for me, I wouldn’t even be in any danger right now. I’d just be asleep in my bedroom, safe among the books given to me by Summer. Surrounded by his scent and only his.
I shove Aidan with both hands and he stumbles back, looking down at me in confused shock.
“Paige—”
“If you can’t be around me, then leave!”
I push desperately at Aidan and he stumbles back again. Part of me thinks I’m acting like a crazy person, but that can’t be helped. I want him to leave my bookstore before I start crying again.
I want him to stop reminding me of Summer.
I keep pushing at Aidan and he keeps retreating from me, farther and farther back, all the way out the front door and into the cold night. Rose petals and blades of grass are scattered behind us, as if we’ve been leaving a trail of breadcrumbs for someone else to follow.
It’s snowing all across the city.
We stare at each other in silence for a few seconds. Aidan impatiently plucks another blade of grass from his hair and lets it fall to the pavement. My heart is vibrating inside my ribcage, as if I’m about to shatter to pieces. It feels like electricity is scorching through my veins again, but this time it’s accompanied by a variety of other sensations.
The feeling of frost so cold it bites.
The taste of nectar so sweet it hurts.
The urge for us to be kissing again, so primal and wild I know it comes from Aidan instead of me.
Something changes in his expression and he falls back another step, as if I haven’t stopped pushing him.
“Who are you?” he asks me.
“I’m Paige,” I say, suddenly unsure of the answer. “Aren’t I?”
“Oh, there’s no doubt that you’re Paige,” he says. “But you’re capable of things you won’t even begin to understand. If you don’t learn how to defend yourself, Jasper will kill you. Which means the second spell you need to learn is telum creare...”
Aidan trails off with his mouth open, as if he’s trying to speak but can’t. It’s almost like he’s frozen. Icicles have formed on his face, and his hair is covered in frost. His muscles have completely stopped moving.
He is frozen.
His green eyes are screaming a warning at me.
Run.
I hastily back away from Aidan, my heart pounding in fear. The snow is gusting into a mixture of ice and hail all around us. I instinctively understand that I have to get back to my apartment. Right now it’s filled with moss and books and safe, familiar warmth. Nothing remotely close to winter can find me up there.
Nothing can even touch me.
But a massive portal is already tearing open in the sky. A dark shape is crouching at the edge of the gap, close enough to reach me in a single bound. Sharp toothy grin and ice blue eyes. Leathery wings long enough to bridge two sides of a riv
er.
The winter dragon.
He leaps at me.
There isn’t enough time to run. I instinctively lean down, snatching up a blade of grass from the pavement.
“Telum creare!” I scream desperately, my breath fogging the cold air.
Before my eyes, the blade of grass begins to magically expand in size, lengthening and hardening until it becomes a sharp weapon made of green metal.
A sword.
The dragon tilts into a sharp dive, aiming straight for me.
I barely manage to lift the blade just in time.
It sinks deep into the creature’s left foreleg.
A loud screech reverberates throughout the atmosphere as the dragon jerks away from me, snow gusting into the air with every flap of his wings. But he recovers in a matter of seconds, reaching out for me with sharp claws.
What I did wasn’t enough.
I scream as the dragon roughly grabs my waist and hoists me into the air. It feels like I’m being raised to the highest point of a drop tower at a theme park, about to be released into a freefall. Only there won’t be any carnival games or funnel cakes at the end of this ride.
Summer has never felt farther away.
A frigid wind rushes against my face as the winter dragon rises into the atmosphere, heading for the portal in the sky. It’s so cold I’ve already forgotten what Aidan felt like inside me. His warmth is slipping farther and farther away by the second, and I’m screaming louder than I ever have before.
But there’s no one left to hear me.
As the temperature plunges to below freezing, I close my eyes tightly and count backwards from ten. Maybe if I try hard enough, I’ll be able to wake myself up from this nightmare.
But when I open my eyes again, I’m in a world filled with snow. Everything suddenly feels terrifyingly real, and I can’t believe I ever thought this place was a theme park.
What did Aidan call it?
The Winter Realm.
The dragon finally descends to a castle made of glittering ice. He tosses me against a battlement and shakes his massive head slowly, as if disappointed with me. I watch, aching and bruised, as the creature begins to change form. His body rapidly shrinks in size, the wings and icicles and scales melting away, until he becomes something else.
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