The MC was an actor who’d been big in the nineties. Evidently, he was a Rho Beta man, too. He still looked good, reminding me of the millions of times I’d watched his black love movies. He was in the middle of a joke when what I recognized as the first note of Ginuwine’s Pony blasted through the speakers and abruptly stopped.
Damn near every man in the room started yelling, “Rhooooooo Beta!” and women started squealing with delight.
“Awwww, shit! Y’all know what time it is!” the MC shouted into the microphone.
I was confused as hell. I didn’t go to college, didn’t know shit about fraternities, and flinched a little when Jah leaned in and said, “Don’t move. If you gotta pee, hold that shit. I don’t want you to get kicked.”
Kicked?
“What?” had barely left my mouth when Pony started playing again, and this time it didn’t stop. Men hopped up from their seats, including Jah’s mountainous ass, and almost simultaneously hit the floor, hunching it to the rhythm of the song, all while loudly chanting, “Rhooooo Beta! Rhoooooo Beta! Rhoooooo Beta!” Then they all changed up their floor-hunching strokes, lifting a leg as they rolled their bodies against the carpet, and all I could think was, What. The. Fuck?
This shit was crazy, crazy and hot. Well, my eyes were pretty much pasted to Jah, so he was hot, really hot considering I’d experienced those very strokes multiple times.
Mary, mother of God!
With wide eyes, I swung my gaze to Kareema who was dancing in her seat to the music. Set’s homicidal ass was staring at her like he was a second from spreading her out on that table. Refocusing my attention on Jah, I licked my lips and rested a hand on my chest.
Damn. Just…damn.
*****
I wasn’t sure what woke me up later that night as I slept in Kareema’s guest bedroom, but whatever it was also made me climb out of bed and walk across the hall where I gently knocked on Jah’s door. Getting no answer, I slowly opened it, stepping inside to see that the bed was empty. Turning to leave, I was startled when I heard, “Don’t go.” His voice was soft and shaky.
I searched the darkness until I found him, sitting on the floor in a corner.
“Jah?”
“You answered my call again, baby,” he said. “You always do.”
I didn’t know what to say. I just knew he needed me, and something in my soul made me walk over to him, lower myself to the floor beside him, and pull him into my arms where he cried himself to sleep.
7
Jah
When I woke up the next morning, Tricia was gone, and I was in the bed butt-ass naked. It took me a moment to remember her waking me up and coaxing me into bed. Later, the memory of my dick ending up in her mouth rushed back to me, and I think I moaned a little as I chewed my scrambled eggs at the breakfast table. Looking up to see everyone staring at me, I muttered, “What? This shit is good.”
“Thank you, Jah,” Tricia said with a grin. “You ain’t the only one who can cook.”
“I see. You got skills, girl. You got skills like a motherfucker.”
Tricia, who was sipping on some orange juice, started coughing. I hopped up to pat her back.
“Trish, you all right, girl?” Kareema asked.
She nodded, holding a hand up to me. “I’m fine. Just went down the wrong way.”
I took my seat but kept concerned eyes on her.
“Aye, y’all grown, so I don’t care about y’all fucking in my house, but got damn, Jah. You were screaming. Scared the shit outta me. It was like four in the morning, man,” Set announced all out of the damn blue.
Tricia started choking again, and I jumped up to help her, but she stopped me. “I’m—” Cough. “Okay—” Cough. “Jah.” Cough.
“Set!” Kareema shrieked.
“What?” he asked.
I was checking myself in the mirror, about to head out to another day of Rho Beta business, when I heard a knock at my door. My dick jumped at the possibility of it being Tricia, and even though I was the national parliamentarian and had to be present at all the meetings, I was more than willing to be late for some of her.
“Yeah?!” I barked.
The door opened, and I heard, “Damn, nigga, where you find all these suits in your big-ass size?”
Set’s ass.
“Fuck you,” I replied with a grin. “Ain’t you got some squats to do over at that gym? What you lifting now? Two pounds?”
“I’m lifting my wife, nigga. That’s what I’m lifting.”
I shook my head. “Then why you hating on me and Trish?”
He closed the door. “I was just fucking with you. She a good look for you, with her talking ass, although she be real quiet around you, and she’s obviously got you turned out. Had your ass in here howling and shit.”
I finally turned to face my older, smaller brother, giving him a smirk. “Again, fuck you.”
Set laughed, leaning against the closed door.
I thought for a minute, and asked, “Hey, can I ask you something, man?”
“Depends on what it is.”
I chewed on the corner of my mouth. “Uh, Kareema know about the shit Omar put us through?”
He stared at me and slowly nodded. “Yeah. She got my heart. I had to tell her.”
“What she say when you told her? She didn’t…did she look at you different?”
He shook his head. “She looked at me like she cared, like the fact that all that shit happened to me broke her heart.”
I nodded. “I ain’t never told no one. Not even Genesis, and I was married to her trifling ass.”
“You wanna tell Trish?”
I shrugged. “She’s got a man.”
“Don’t look like it to me. The way you look at her? That’s the way she looks at you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
I smiled and then dropped it as I asked, “Hey, uh…when’s the last time you saw Omar and Mama?”
“When I scooped Kareema up and brought her here to stay. You?”
“Shit, man…it’s been awhile. Can’t stand to see the motherfucker like that.”
“Yeah, me neither.”
*****
The evening event on this day was a performance in honor of our women, known affectionately as the TenderRHOnies. I sat next to Tricia in the auditorium as Kem sang Love Calls. Set and Kareema were on the other side of her on the same row, Set’s face in his wife’s neck. Damn, I was jealous of his ass. He had her with him all the time. I wanted that, too, but not with just anybody. I wanted it with Tricia.
I glanced at her to see her smiling at me, looking too good in an orange jumpsuit that hugged her body. Trish could dress, and I loved that shit. I smiled back at her and returned my attention to the stage. When she grabbed my hand and held it in her lap, my heart skipped about ten beats.
Then my phone buzzed, and as I reached to check it, she glared at me. So I said fuck the phone, kissed her cheek, and kept enjoying the show.
With her.
Tricia
It was late when we all made it back to Set’s and Kareema’s house, having been serenaded by Kem, Kenny Latimore, and my absolute favorite, the one and only Freddie Jackson. Set and Kareema had already hurried off to bed while I made a pit stop in the kitchen to get a glass of water. I’d assumed Jah had turned in as well, but as I walked down the hall to my room, I saw him standing next to my door. Opening it, I stared at him, and once he walked inside, I followed him, closing and locking the door behind us.
8
Tricia
Lying naked in bed, I stared into the darkness as Jah’s body rested against the back of mine and smiled. This felt…right, even though it was supposed to be wrong.
“Omar? My pops? He was mean, abusive to me and my brothers…” Jah began, unprompted. I’d thought maybe he was drifting off until he spoke. Before I could respond, he went on to tell me about his father “training” him and Set and Shu to be men. “Set got the worst of it,” he said. “Be
cause he was the oldest, he got the worst of it. But we all got it. I was snatched out of my sleep all the time, jerked to my feet and punched in the chest from the time I was like seven. It happened so much that I was scared to sleep at night, would fall asleep at school. When the teachers called about that, I got my ass beat again, so I’d just…wish myself to sleep, or wish—shit, this is gonna sound fucked up.”
“No, it won’t. Tell me,” I said softly.
His voice wavered. “I would wish he’d pick Shu or Set. Shit, even my mama, but he never hit her. He respected her too much.”
“Jah, you were a kid, a baby. It’s okay.”
“Nah, it was weak. He was tryna make me strong, but I was so weak…”
I flipped over in the bed and groped until my hands found the sides of his face. “No,” I said sternly, “you were a little boy, not a damn man. Your father was wrong. Not you. I know how it can be. Neither of my parents had time to raise me. My granny did, and she’s gone now.”
“Sorry to hear that.”
“Thank you.”
“Tricia?”
“Yes?”
“I think I love you.”
“Jah—”
“You ain’t gotta say nothing. I just…needed to tell you.”
“Okay.”
After a few moments of silence, I said, “I can’t have kids.”
“Huh?”
“I’ve tried, with my—we tried. I can get pregnant, but I can’t carry a baby to term. My cervix is incompetent, or some shit they told me. I’ve miscarried five times. The last time, I lost so much blood I had to have a transfusion. The doctors tried medicine to help me hold the baby, but it didn’t work. I had my tubes tied, because getting pregnant is actually dangerous for me at this point.”
“Oh.”
“Um, I could get the tubal ligation reversed and try again, though. There’s a procedure they can do. I didn’t try it before because I was scared, but I’m willing—”
“Why the fuck would you put yourself through that? Why would you put yourself in danger again?”
“I-I thought…I don’t know where this thing between us is going, but you’re younger than me and most men want kids. My—he wanted a son. Don’t you? I mean, I’ll understand—”
“Break up with your nigga.”
“Jah, I was talking.”
“I ain’t tryna hear that shit. You think I’d risk your life for any reason? I’m almost forty-damn years old, not some kid running around trying to plant a damn baby. Old Buddy should’ve shut that shit down before it got to five times. Losing that many kids wasn’t good for your mind or your body. Who the fuck puts their woman through that? He had you. Fuck a kid. You’re enough. You’re everything.”
I was speechless.
So he continued, “Now, back to what I was saying. You need to break up with him. We been fucking for damn near a year now. And even though you called yourself cutting things off last month, we been messing around longer than my marriage lasted. I love you, and I need you in my life full time.”
“Jah, I don’t have a job or an education. My only skill is buying clothes and putting outfits together. I can’t leave one man who is taking care of me just for you to do the same thing. I need to stand on my own two feet for once.”
“Okay, you can stand on those motherfuckers at 1891 Garrett Drive.”
“Isn’t that your address?”
“Yeah.”
“Jah—”
“Just think about the moving in with me part right now. But what can’t wait is you leaving dude. I don’t know shit about him, and I don’t wanna know shit about him. I just know I can’t share you with him no more. If we gonna do this, we need to do this right.”
“Even though it started off wrong?”
“I don’t see shit wrong about us being together. What’s wrong is you staying with that motherfucker long after it was time to leave. He can’t say he never stepped out on you, but I can.”
“W-what?”
“I ain’t been with another woman since the first time I touched you.”
Wrapping my arms around his hard body, I said, “If I break up with him, you gotta break up with whoever the hell keeps texting you.”
“A lot of females text me, Trish, but I ain’t fucking none of them.”
“Then they need to stop texting you, ASAP, especially Jennifer.”
“Who the fuck is Jennifer? I don’t know a Jennifer. Wait, I do know one, but she ain’t got my number.”
“Your ex. The one you and Set were talking about at dinner the other night.”
“Genesis? That motherfucker cheated on me with a friend. That’s why after I rearranged his face, I put her out my house. I ain’t fucked up about her and she knows it.”
“Oh…”
“Why you sound like that?”
“I…I’m a cheater, remember?”
“Not the same. Your man ain’t shit. I am.”
“I can’t argue with that. But back to the bitches texting you?”
“You breaking up with Old Buddy?”
I didn’t answer.
“Look, I get it. You think you owe him for sticking with you even though he didn’t get a son out of the deal, or is it because he takes care of you? None of that gave him the right to disrespect you, Tricia. Get rid of his ass. ASAP, as you put it.”
“Okay, I will,” I said.
“Then consider those other women blocked.”
9
Tricia
One month earlier…
What was once a monthly thing—me showing up at his doorstep at all times of night, him welcoming me inside his home, me welcoming him inside of me—morphed into a weekly thing six months in, and the deeper I fell in with Jah, the sweeter and more attentive Saul grew. The guilt was cloying, suffocating.
But I still couldn’t stop, because I was drawn to the man. Me going to him had ceased being a voluntary action after the first time we were together. It was just…instinct. So for the last two months of our…affair, I made my way to his home every week until one day when instead of showing up at his house after dark, I made a trip to Jah’s place of business.
JD’s Auto Repair had to be the cleanest mechanic shop I’d ever stepped foot in, from the lobby to what I could see of the garage through the open door that connected the two as I sat and waited for one of his employees to retrieve him. When he walked into the lobby, I think my heart stopped for a few seconds. It wasn’t just that he looked delicious in those coveralls, it was the look in his beautiful eyes, like he knew why I was there. I’d already hurt him, and I hadn’t said a word.
“Can I help you, Ms. Gurley?” he asked, the pain in his eyes transforming into anger.
Standing from the seat I’d claimed, I moved closer to him. “Ms. Gurley?”
“Yeah.”
“Why am I Ms. Gurley now?”
“Because I can tell you’re here on some bullshit. Aren’t you?”
I sighed. “Jah, I…I’m sorry.”
“About what?”
“I-we-I can’t see you anymore.”
He nodded. “I figured that was why you came here instead of my house. To be honest, I saw this coming, and you needed to stop all that driving alone in the middle of the night shit you kept doing anyway, since you refused to call me.”
I could only stare at him because, what? He was standing there still concerned about my safety while I dumped him? Now I really felt like shit.
“Thanks for telling me,” he added, and then he turned and walked back into the garage.
And me? I climbed in my car and cried all the way home.
That day and all the pain surrounding it played in my head as I sat out on Kareema’s patio holding my phone. Considering the fact that what I had with Saul had long evaporated from my heart, having morphed from a love affair to an arrangement, and the love I held for Jah Mitchell, our connection, this should’ve been easy. But it wasn’t. I hated the idea of hurting a man who’d been a part of my
life for so many years.
Nevertheless, I called him, holding the phone up to my ear with a trembling hand.
“Hello?” he answered. “Trish?”
“Hey, Saul. You busy?”
“Not too busy to talk to you. How’s Vegas?”
“It’s really nice. Um, Saul, I need to tell you something.”
“Okay…”
“I think we should go our separate ways. I’m-I’m sorry.”
“So you done took your ass to Vegas just to break up with me? You fucking somebody out there?! The fuck Kareema’s ass got you into?”
“Nothing! It’s just time. It’s been time. Things aren’t the same between us and you know it.”
“They damn sho’ ain’t because I been sitting around this got damn house, not doing shit, tryna make you happy. I dropped my hoes for this? Fuck you, Trish!”
He hung up on me and I just sighed, wondering to myself how I ever could’ve loved a man who’d talk to me like that.
Jah
I held Trish in my arms as we danced to the sounds of the jazz band providing the entertainment for the night’s event, a jazz and poetry extravaganza. It felt like we were the only people in the room. I really did love her. I wasn’t clear on when I fell, but my ass was on the floor, legs up in the air kicking like a happy-ass dog for her. And it wasn’t just the stellar pussy or her booty meat. It was her. Something in her soul called to me and connected to my heart. The shit was hard to explain, but I knew she was supposed to be mine and I was supposed to be hers.
I leaned in close and kissed her neck, making her giggle. She said it tickled. So I did it again, making her throw her head back and laugh. Then I kissed her thick lips, and we kept dancing.
Jah: A Novella (Them Boys Book 2) Page 4
