I shrugged. “It’s true.”
Harlow sighed, getting up from her spot on the couch and walking over to me. I pulled her into my arms, kissing the top of her head as she leaned into me with her arms around my waist. “You should’ve reminded me about your birthday next Tuesday,” I whispered, running my hand up her back and into her hair.
“I don’t like my birthdays,” she said quietly. “Jagger and I usually just get some cupcakes and that’s it. Besides, I never really had people to invite to my birthday.”
I hated the thought of Jagger not getting her more than just cupcakes for her birthdays. I knew he was hiding the fact that he killed people for a living, but Harlow deserved more than just lousy small cakes which were probably not even that good.
“You got me now. And Bliss.” I pondered for a while before continuing. “I’ll make some dinner. And before that, we’ll make ourselves a fun day. Maybe head out of town, get you some presents.”
“I work on Tuesday,” she said, keeping her voice still quiet.
“You got work tomorrow, right? I’m going with you and tell Frankie about wanting to work there and that we’re gonna take a day off on Tuesday for your birthday.” I was starting to think that she really hated her birthday. She didn’t answer, instead, she lifted her head and revealed a small pout on her lips before kissing me. Great. Now she was just distracting me from my plan.
“Don’t think we’re done talking about your birthday,” I whispered against her lips and pulled her closer. Her arms loosened around me and her hands coming up to hold on to my shoulders.
Just as I thought this would turn into yet another hot make-out session with my girl, she pulled back and looked up at me with a sweet smile on her face.
“I gotta get ready for bed,” she said and walked off to the bathroom without saying another word.
Chapter Twenty-One
Hunter
I had already slipped under the covers when Harlow came into the bedroom. She was wearing a long-sleeved shirt which she always wore to bed. It was too big on her and I wondered if it was just Jagger’s. But then, even for Jagger, it would be too big.
“It’s Dean’s,” she said quietly, noticing me staring at her shirt. I looked up at her, furrowing my brows in confusion.
“Why do you have that?” I asked, reaching for her hand and pulling her onto the bed next to me. She didn’t hesitate but slid right under the covers next to me and snuggled up to my side. “I found it some years ago in a box we had lying around the house. Not sure why I kept it.”
I cupped the side of her head with my left hand and held her close to my body with my other arm wrapped around her back. Of course, I didn’t have an explanation for that either.
“It’s just a sweatshirt,” I said, thinking that I just stated the obvious, but she was probably thinking too much into it. Harlow nodded and turned her head to look up at me.
“When’s your birthday?” she asked, changing the subject smoothly but bringing up something I’d rather not talk about.
“Not sure,” I admitted, hoping this conversation would be over already. With a confused look on her face, she pushed herself up to look down at me.
“What do you mean you don’t know?”
I shrugged, not meeting her eyes. “You think my parents left anything at the orphanage when they dropped me off there?” That came out a little harsh and I wished I had my temper under control. At least with Harlow. But as always, she stayed calm, trying to keep the conversation going without making me mad.
“So then…if they didn’t leave any sort of birth certificate, how did you get your name?” she asked, and it was a legitimate question. I didn’t give her much information other than my parents not leaving anything behind when they abandoned me.
Taking a deep breath, I prepared myself for what came next. “When they brought me to the orphanage, they had put a note inside the blanket I was wrapped in. The name Hunter was written on it, but I doubt that was the name they picked out for me. Who the fuck names their kid Hunter? Besides, there were no records in any hospital for a mother who birthed a baby named like that.”
I was already starting to get angry, just remembering my past.
“I like it. I think it fits you,” Harlow said with a smile, brushing some of my hair off my forehead. “And what about your last name?” She didn’t linger too long on mt last answer.
“Kane is Bliss’s last name. I didn’t have any real identity, so they chose to give me the same name as her.”
Harlow’s smile never faded, and I could almost read her mind. She thought it was a good idea that they had given me Bliss’s last name since we got to the orphanage on the same day. “I think your name is perfect. And Bliss is obviously proud of it,” she said, confirming what I thought she was thinking.
***
Harlow
He let out a hard laugh, shaking his head and pushing me off to the side gently so he could sit up. “I couldn’t care less what Bliss thinks about all that. Hell, I’m no one. My whole identity was pretty much made up by strangers, giving me a surname of a family I have nothing to do with.” He was angry, and at that moment I couldn’t do much other than listen and hope he’d calm down.
He started to pace the floor next to the bed, running his hands through his hair. “I have a fucking ID with a name on it that doesn’t belong to me.” He suddenly seemed concerned and stressed at the same time and I could tell by the way his bottom lip trembled that he was about to cry.
“Hunter…” I said quietly, getting up from the bed and standing right in front of him, making him stop in his tracks.
“No,” he said through gritted teeth. His eyes were darker than ever, and he was tense all over his body. The way he clenched his jaw told me he was keeping it all in.
“Hunter,” I tried again, lifting my hands to cup his face. And just like that, his head fell, and a sob escaped him.
This was new to me. He had shown me many emotions throughout the past months but never had I seen him this frustrated and angry with himself. All I knew was that I hated to see him like that. He was bringing himself down, making himself feel bad and no one ever deserved to feel that way.
“I’m nothing,” he whispered and that broke my heart.
“You’re everything to me,” I started, looking into his eyes and keeping his head between my hands so he wouldn’t look away. “It might not be enough, but for me you’re everything. Do you hear me? You’re a good man and I’ve learned to love you the way you are. The person you are. You’re perfect and I hate seeing you like this.” I stopped for a second to gather all my thoughts. Seeing Hunter cry and suffer hurt.
“We break sometimes for things we didn’t do. Things we’re not guilty of. But what matters is what we do with our lives to change the way we felt in the past. I know this isn’t about me, but no matter what Dean or my mother did to us, I don’t let that shape me for who I wanna be today, or in five years.” I was trying to prove a point, but it felt as if I was just talking random things that didn’t make any sense.
“What I’m trying to say is,” I sighed, wiping away the tears on his cheeks. “I love you. I don’t care what your name is, where you’re from, or what those people did to you in the past. I love you for who you are.”
Hunter didn’t say a word at first. He just looked at me and small sobs escaped him. Finally, after a long, silent break of words being spoken, he sighed and pulled me to him with his hand on the back of my head and kissed me gently. “I love you too, sweetheart.”
Thank God, because I wasn’t letting go of him, ever.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Hunter
It felt good to just let go and let the emotions run out of me. I felt drained inside, wanting that emptiness in me to just disappear. Luckily, I knew Harlow was filling it slowly with her love. But I hated the way I still showed her my miserable sides. The ones I was trying so hard to hide from her and her beautiful soul. She didn’t deserve the way I acted when I g
ot angry, but I had yet to find out how to stop it.
Harlow handled me well when I went apeshit over the simplest things. Problem was, most things bothered me and the only way I was able to handle them was by getting angry. Harlow had asked me many times if I would like to talk about the things bothering me, but I always refused, knowing talking about those things only made me more anxious. That’s why I had asked her to just let me burst and be patient. She was good at being patient with me— it was one of many reasons why I knew she was my one.
Anxiety was the other thing standing in my way to find real happiness. Of course, when Harlow was around, she was all that mattered. But the second she left, something like panic rose inside of me and all I wanted to do was either get her back in my arms or take out my gun and just shoot at a tree for several hours. Dealing with that shit was incredibly hard. People liked to make fun of those who suffered from depression and anxiety attacks. Nothing fun about that at all. All of that mixed up with the storm inside my head was hard to deal with.
Luckily, I had three people by my side who knew how to handle it all. People I knew I could trust blindly. One of those people was running her hand through my hair, making me shiver with her soft touch. We were still standing in the middle of her bedroom, my arms around her body, pressing her tightly against mine.
***
Harlow
What Hunter went through was serious. Bliss had talked to me about it before and she told me that he wasn’t letting doctors help him. He said those doctors were bullshit and only treating people to make a shit ton of money. I’ve heard about some psychiatrists who didn’t take their patients seriously, but I’ve also heard of some people getting better from therapy.
I was all for helping him learn to love himself and get better, but he refused to go see a doctor. For now, I was okay with it. I knew how to react to his outbursts and how to calm him down, but if it stopped working, I would talk to him about seeing a doctor. He told me he was doing okay, and I trusted him.
“We need some sleep,” I whispered against his lips. The kiss he gave me turned into something more and his hands moved to my lower back, pressing his hips against me to let me feel his stiffening cock.
“I need you,” he said in a hoarse voice which almost broke my heart. He knew how to use his words to make me melt, and lucky him, it worked every damn time.
His hands moved lower to cover my bottom, moving me against him to feel his thickness in his briefs. I rubbed up against him, wanting to feel more. As if he could read my mind, his hands slid down my thighs and then jerked me up by the knees until I couldn’t help but wrap both my legs tightly around his hips. He moved to the bed, laying me down onto it and leaning over me with one arm propped up next to my head. We never broke the kiss, letting our tongues play with each other in soft, passionate movements.
His hardness was pressing against me where I needed it the most and I cried out against his lips, lifting my hips to meet his movements. Even with some of our clothes on, I still enjoyed this. He took his time, made me feel incredible, and always made sure I was the one getting pleasured first. He wasn’t selfish. He cared.
“Fuck,” Hunter muttered and broke the kiss, looking into my eyes while his left hand made its way down to my panties. My shirt was easily lifted to my stomach, revealing the black piece of fabric I wore underneath. Hunter never complained about the way I dressed, including my underwear. Bliss once showed me her collection of bras and slips. They were all different colors, some red, some black, and even a pink set. She explained how much guys liked girls in lingerie. At first, I thought I’d have to get something like that too. But then I asked Hunter about it, and if he would like to see me in that kinda stuff.
He just looked at me with a raised brow and told me, “Only gonna rip that shit off of you and get you naked anyway.”
Remembering that conversation made me smile and I reached for his hand. His fingers were already on my panties, pushing them down my legs. “What’s wrong?” he asked and stopped moving. I shook my head, pressing my lips together.
“I just love you, that’s all.”
He smiled at that, lowering his head to kiss my neck. He trailed kisses down to my collarbone, then lifted my shirt further and over my breasts. His lips touched my stomach and I couldn’t stop watching him. When he licked along the hem of my panties, he finally tore them off of me and put them next to him on the bed. With one last glance, he lowered his head between my legs and let his tongue run over my most sensitive spot.
Another cry escaped me, and I couldn’t help but pull his hair tight. My hips buckled and that sweet sensation came over me. It wasn’t just the way he flicked his tongue against my clit, but the way he held me tight with his hands on my stomach and thighs made it all feel incredible.
His eyes met mine and I felt the heat come over me as his tongue moved faster. “Oh, Hunter!” I moaned, lifting my hips again to let him know I was close. But then, I knew he felt it. I was shaking and I felt that familiar throb deep down my abdomen.
“That’s it, love,” I heard him say and I knew I was already on the edge of spiraling out of control. “Come for me. Let me taste your sweet pussy coming.”
“HUNTER!” I finally cried out, throwing my head back and closing my eyes tightly. I was shaking, my legs trying to squeeze together and my toes curling against the bedsheets.
I was in heaven, and I was only realizing that it was just the beginning.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Hunter
When it came to Harlow and making her feel good, I didn’t care about much else. I was focused on her and her body. The way she reacted to my touch and the sounds of my name falling from her lips. I was just as lost in all of it as Harlow was, and I shouldn’t have been.
The slamming of the front door was enough to tell me that we had been too loud, letting Jagger take part in all of our private business. Fuck me.
I quickly got up from the bed and put on my jeans, which I’d folded carefully just moments ago before getting into bed. When Harlow realized what was going on, her face turned white and pure fear danced in her eyes. “Stay here. I got this,” I told her, putting on a shirt before walking out of the room.
Before I reached the front door, I heard footsteps behind me, and I cursed at Harlow’s lack of listening. I glanced back at her, frowning and shaking my head. “Didn’t you hear me?” I asked. She mimicked my expression and passed me to get to the door.
“This is my fault. I don’t need you two to throw punches again.”
With that, she stepped outside but stopped in her tracks when she saw Jagger pacing the small walkway leading up to the few steps we were now standing on.
“Harlow, let me talk to him,” I whispered, taking her hand and pulling her back. By the look of it, Jagger was mad. The deep, long pulls he took from his cigarette told me he needed more than just a small thing like that to release some stress.
“No,” she said and pulled her hand out of mine with one firm tug. I watched her leave the deck of the house, using the small steps and then walking up to Jagger. I ran my hands through my hair, knowing this time he wouldn’t hold back. Not even on his sister. He was pissed and he was going to let it out right there.
***
Harlow
What was I thinking? I should’ve kept quiet and hid what we were doing in my bedroom. Even if Jagger told me he was okay with Hunter and me together, the thing we did a few minutes ago wasn’t necessary for him to hear. I was ashamed and I hated the way I was feeling.
I’ve seen Jagger mad before, but never because of me. It was either because of Dean, or something that happened at work. He talked to me about it and then that subject was cleared. But this time, I was the one who caused all of this. I made him mad.
I was standing right in front of him, but he didn’t pay any attention to me. I was trying to form words for a good enough apology, but nothing came to mind. I was still stuck by the thought of him hating me. Luckily, he saw the strug
gle I had and started the conversation.
“I thought I was okay with this,” he said, now turning to me and pointing at Hunter. “But this is too fucking much.” He took the last drag from his cigarette before tossing it to the ground and lighting another one.
“Jagger, I’m sorry—”
“Shut it for a second, all right?” he said, looking at me with glassy eyes. He was tired and he also had work tomorrow, but I was keeping him up. I opened my mouth to argue back, to tell him not to talk to me that way, but I had no right to fight back now.
“Come on, man, don’t talk to her like that,” Hunter said calmly, yet his voice was serious. Jagger let out a harsh laugh, turning away from me completely.
“What’ya gonna do about it?” Jag said mockingly and took another drag. “Wanna fight me? Wanna end up with another broken nose like that time you let some bastard run over my sister?”
“Jag…” I cried out, letting a deep crease appear between my brows. Tears stung my eyes and I wondered why this was happening. Why now? We had enough shit to handle.
“Watch it, Jagger,” Hunter warned and stepped closer. He pulled me back so I was standing behind him.
“Why, huh? Why the fuck would I watch it when you’re fucking my sister in the next room?” I hated this. Hearing it made me feel sick. It was wrong, but it happened. Yet, I felt ashamed.
Jagger moved closer, not caring about any personal space. This wasn’t going to end well. “Please, stop.” I tried to step between them, but both of their arms pushed me back, not breaking their eye contact.
“We’re sorry. Jesus, we’re in love. What else do you expect?” Hunter said. That was the first time I slightly disagreed with him. Not the love part, but the fact that Jagger had to expect us having sex, or for that matter foreplay, when he’s in the house.
Harlow (The Hastings Series Book 2) Page 8
