by May Dawson
“I hadn’t earned any of that. And I swore I’d never forget their kindness on the weakest night of my life.” His lips tightened. “But maybe I did forget.”
“You’ll get the chance to make it right,” I promised him, but I couldn’t help thinking that both Seb and Finn were missing.
He raked his hand through his wet hair, as if he was thinking the same thing. “Yeah. I hope so.”
I studied his face, struck with the knowledge that he could have avoided the subject. “Why’d you tell me this story?”
“I want you to know who I am,” he said. “Good, bad and ugly. So you can decide…” He chewed his lower lip.
Oh, god. He thought I’d decide I wanted someone else, because he hadn’t been perfect all his life? As if I’d been ever been perfect.
I caught his bare shoulders, which were still beaded with water droplets and were warm and hard against my palms.
“I already decided, Logan. You can tell me anything, but it’s not so I can decide if you’re worthy or not. I love you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
Logan stared at me for a second with those dark-lashed blue eyes as if he didn’t believe me. Then one corner of his lips turned up in a smile, and his eyes crinkled at the edges.
“Do you mind if I kiss you, princess?”
“I mind if you don’t.”
His lips met mine in a long, sweet kiss. There was something different between this kiss and our other kisses.
Logan kissed me like he loved me, and I kissed him back knowing that I loved him.
I was brave enough to love him, and even braver to say it.
Kai burst out of the water. He took a deep breath, then pushed his wet, dark curls back from his face as he looked around, and his eyes widened. Kai would never admit it, but the magic of the cavern must amaze him too.
Arthur surfaced. He looked to make sure Kai was safe. His tattooed back and powerful arms worked as he glided smoothly through the blue pool, as if he were born in the water.
Arthur lifted himself out of the water and wrapped his arms around me. He felt warm against my cool skin, and I pressed my face against the hard expanse of his chest.
“You did it,” he murmured, his voice full of pride.
“Why would you be impressed by that?” I asked, although my heart swelled at his tone. “Swimming is nothing to you.”
“It’s not nothing for you,” he said. “Maybe someday it will be. But today, that was brave.” He pressed a kiss to my cheek.
Both Logan and Arthur were so close to me that I could feel the heat coming off their bodies. Despite everything, I felt a throb of lust being so near them. I turned my lips to catch Arthur’s, and the chaste kiss he had planted on my cheek turned into something more as our lips met. His hand caught my cheek, holding me steady.
Logan’s hands were on my waist. He leaned forward, brushing his lips over my shoulder. I almost moaned in desire.
Arthur’s gaze flickered to Logan, over my shoulder. My breath froze in my chest, waiting for his reaction. His lips quirked in a smile, and then he lowered his head to kiss my décolletage. As his questing lips brushed over the tops of my breasts, I turned my face, and Logan’s lips met mine.
Josh and Callum emerged from the water at almost the same time, as if Callum had hung back to make sure Josh and Kai made it through after their injuries.
Callum’s eyes landed on Logan and Arthur, and me between them. Jealousy flared in his expression, and then it was gone.
Tuck surfaced, drawing a frantic breath. “I’m fine, guys. Thanks for looking out.”
Arthur stood to his feet and offered me a hand up. “Let’s go explore your castle for the day, my queen.”
Chapter 25
“I wish someone had showed this to me while we weren’t in a fight for our lives,” I said as we climbed through the gorgeous caverns. My words seemed to echo. “I would’ve enjoyed seeing this when I had time to appreciate it.”
“I’ll scold Seb and Finn,” Logan promised me, but as soon as he said the words, his expression turned rueful. We were all worried about them, even if we didn’t talk about it.
“I’m going on a scouting mission,” Arthur said, as if he thought the same thing.
“I’ll come with you,” Callum said.
Arthur shook his head. “As much as I would appreciate the backup, you need to recuperate.”
Callum’s brows lifted, as if he didn’t believe that Arthur was capable of appreciating him.
“Logan, I need you here,” Arthur said, and his eyes cut meaningfully toward Tuck, who walked behind us, looking as if he was dead on his feet. “I’ll go scout for information and I’ll be back before you know it.”
“You shouldn’t go alone,” Logan said.
Arthur ignored him. Of course he did. He was still Arthur, even after all we’d been through together. Then he gripped my shoulders, pulling me aside. “I need your help most of all.”
I stared up into his face, wondering why he’d tugged me away from the others. We were all on the same side. Callum glanced our way and then, shaking his head, led the climb. The others passed by us, and Arthur watched them go as if he needed to speak to me alone.
He paused, as if he was uncomfortable. “Can you try to bring Callum, Josh and Kai up to full strength? They’ve all taken a beating over the last forty-eight hours.”
I cocked my head at him, and then understanding dawned. “You guys think that I have this magic, but I’m not sure—”
“I’m sure you are magic,” he interrupted me, “and that’s what we need from you right now.”
“I’ll try,” I said.
“That’s all anyone can ask.” He rubbed his arms up and down my forearms, his touch warming my chilled skin. “We all need to be one-hundred-percent for the fight to come.”
I chewed my lower lip.
When he brushed his thumb over my lip, the gesture fond, I looked up at him, realizing I’d been lost in my worries. I let my lip fall away from my teeth, realizing I’d almost bitten it raw.
“What are the odds we all make it out of this?” I asked him softly.
“Don’t worry about the odds,” he told me. “They don’t matter. We’re going to fight.”
“Unless…” Unless I gave them what they wanted. Maybe Rippedthroat would be willing to take me and leave Maddie in peace with my pack. The memory of that dark, sunless space under my father’s hunting lodge rose, as quick as fear. But I could bear anything if I knew the people I loved were safe. “Unless we make a deal.”
“How about we get the Shenandoah pack’s cubs back?” he asked. “See if we can get their pack on our side?”
Maybe there was a way out that didn’t involve sacrificing myself. I knew Arthur would respond poorly to the idea. I’d keep it to myself, just in case things got really desperate.
“Arthur,” I said, “that sounds like the kind of scheme the good guy would have up his sleeve.”
“Well,” he said, his voice teasing. “I guess I just want to be the kind of man you want.”
No matter how teasingly he said the words, they had the ring of truth.
I caught his shoulders with my hands, even though it meant bobbing up onto my toes. His hands closed automatically around my hips.
“You’ve always been the kind of man I want,” I told him. “From that first time in the woods.”
His brows arched. “And here I thought you were scared of me that day.”
“It felt like a perverse kind of desire,” I admitted, and a surprised grin pulled at the corners of his lips.
“I have more perverse desire where that came from,” he promised, which I did not doubt, and then his lips came down on mine. I slid my arm around his shoulders, kissing him back furiously, as he scooped to gather me into his arms. I was so petite and he was such a giant that it must have seemed easier to just pick me up.
The two of us traded furious kisses until finally he set me down on my feet, reluctantly unwinding his arms fr
om around me. “I should go. I need to find out what’s going on.”
“Be careful out there,” I warned him. “I’ll never survive if something happens to you.”
His brows arched as if he was surprised by that confession.
My fingernails caressed the tattoos on his forearms. “I was hoping to hear you grovel about your poor decisions, when you tried to keep me here against my will.”
He frowned. “I thought I already groveled. I said I was sorry.”
“Did you?” I asked skeptically.
“Well,” he amended. “I said I made a mistake.”
“Hm.” I tapped my finger playfully against my lips, as if I was considering that.
Arthur tugged my finger away from my lips and nipped it with his teeth, then drew it into his mouth. His tongue swirled against my fingertip and then down my finger to my palm, and I almost gasped.
He was grinning as he pressed a kiss to my palm and then squeezed my hand in his before he let go. “I’ll survive to grovel later,” he promised with a wink.
It seemed like he intended to enjoy groveling, which I wasn’t sure was exactly how it was supposed to work, but I was sure I’d enjoy it too.
Arthur kissed me goodbye one more time, and then headed back down the caves.
I turned my head over my shoulder to watch him go as he pulled his t-shirt over his head, his back muscles rippling.
“Don’t break your neck,” Kai said into my ear, intimately close.
I jumped, then turned to face Kai. I was annoyed at him for startling me. But his arms were crossed over his chest, his rune-tattooed biceps standing out, and his handsome face was still the face I loved even when he was sullen.
“Jealous?” I asked him. They all seemed jealous, and it was beginning to wear on me. We had a war to fight, and that was reason enough to be glad we were all together. However awkward this was, it would be worth it. I needed all my men. I needed them to be my family.
“Yes,” he said bluntly. “But I’ve been honest about that, haven’t I?”
“You haven’t been talking to me for me to know.”
Kai pulled a face.
I thought he was going to say something else, but he didn’t. He turned to follow the others higher into the caves. He’d come back to check on me, and now he had nothing to say. But he still cared.
“You drive me crazy,” I told him.
He stopped and turned around, knitting his arms over his chest. “Oh, it’s mutual, princess.”
“I’ve just been doing my best with the situation,” I said.
“Yeah, no one can argue that,” he said. “You get kidnapped by another pack, you make them fall in love with you. You look so helpless, so sweet, but you aren’t really helpless, are you?”
Was I really supposed to feel guilty over not being helpless?
He was already going on. “Sorry, you weren’t kidnapped. You decide to sacrifice yourself for the rest of us…”
“Why are you so angry about that?” I demanded. “You act like I abandoned you.”
“For a good cause,” he said, yet again, his voice flat.
“Yes!” I said. “To save you and my sister. Why are you so angry?”
“I don’t want you to hurt yourself for me,” he said, closing the distance between us. “I don’t want you to be someone else’s ‘for me’. I was fighting for you that day. To protect you and your sister.”
“And so was I,” I said, my voice coming out fierce. “I was fighting for our pack. The only way I could.”
“You don’t need me,” he said, his voice ragged with anger.
“I never said that.”
“I was willing to fight to the death for you,” he said, staring fixedly over my shoulder, his jaw set and angry. “They almost had me. There were teeth in my throat, about to rip my life away. And then suddenly, the wolves were all gone. Following you as you left us.”
“You’re angry I saved your life?”
“Don’t be stupid, Piper,” he said, his voice irritated. “I’m angry that I’m so easily replaced. By other wolves. By a stronger pack. By wolves that would’ve killed me in a heartbeat.”
A muscle in his jaw stood out in a tic, and he stared past me at the cave wall. “Which one do you think that was, anyway? Is it one of the men you make love to now? Was it Logan who almost ripped my throat out? Finn?”
“You haven’t been replaced,” I said.
He shook his head, still refusing to meet my eyes. “If one of them had killed me, would you love them anyway?”
The question made a terrible image bloom in my imagination.
“If one of them had killed you,” I said softly, “I can’t imagine I would know. I’d still be broken and grieving.”
His lips twisted, and his voice came out bitter. “You care about me so much.”
“Yes,” I said. “I do, you stupid prick. Why did you tell my sister I abandoned you both?”
He shook his head. “I didn’t. I told your sister all the sweet little lies I don’t quite believe myself.”
“But you said that I abandoned you both—”
“Because that’s how she sees it! She needed someone to speak up for her, for once. She doesn’t know how to tell you.”
“Well, you’re certainly always willing to tell me exactly what you think,” I muttered.
He shook his head, his jaw still tight. “Not exactly. And be thankful for that.”
“You hate me so much, huh?”
“I hate what you do to me.” He pinned me to the rock wall, broad biceps braced to either side of my head.
I could’ve ducked under his arm and gone on, but I didn’t. My heart pounded in my chest.
“And what do I do to you?” I met his gaze, now that he couldn’t avoid me.
“You make me weak,” he said. “You make me want you when I can’t trust you to stay.”
His voice was threaded with old pain, and it made my heart ache for him, no matter if we were fighting.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I promised.
“Unless you decide you should.”
I raised my eyebrows. “So sorry that I’m my own person and that I make my own decisions.”
“You should be sorry that you’re a pain in the ass person who makes terrible decisions.”
“So walk away.” I wrapped my hands around his biceps, thinking I’d pull his arms away from the wall and free myself. I’d be the one to walk away. But as my fingers curled into the warm muscle, I found myself longing for him despite the emotional distance between us. I changed my mind.
I stared into his furious dark eyes, and my eyebrows lifted in challenge. I could feel the arrogant smirk pulling at my lips. Well, I’d learned that from the finest smirkers in the mid-Atlantic region. They could only blame themselves when I turned that same cockiness on them.
“What are you waiting for?” I taunted him, and then I brushed my lips against his.
He groaned into my mouth as if it hurt him to resist me.
Then suddenly, he kissed me back fiercely. His hand cupped my cheek.
I reached my hands up, capturing his jaw in my hands. He took his wrists in my hand and, quick as danger, pinned them to the wall above my head.
He leaned back, his long, dark lashed half-lowered over his fierce eyes, which looked black in the dim light. A satisfied smile curved his lips as he saw me powerless under his touch.
So I waited, letting him pin me to the wall. That was what he needed: to pin me down, to know I wouldn’t leave him. At least for the moment.
“You are a deeply broken man,” I murmured.
“You’re not exactly well yourself,” he whispered back, but there was affection in his words, the same as there was in mine.
We were broken in different ways, but our shattered edges seemed to fit together.
He pressed his lips to my neck. My head lolled back against the rock. His lips roamed my throat as if he would devour me, kissing and sucking and nibbling, and my chin r
ose toward the low rock ceiling above, opening myself to him.
Arthur had told me to try to heal them. To heal Kai. It was the responsible thing to do. For the pack, for our mission.
But it was also what I wanted.
He kissed me wildly. His lips were so familiar, from that narrow upper lip to the surprising softness of his rounded lower lip. He tasted of salt water, and even though I knew it was from the ocean, I could have been kissing away tears.
My wrists ached, pinned against the wall, and my back arched, my hips swaying toward his. But the pain and discomfort faded in my desire for him. My lips parted, welcoming him in. When his tongue and mine swirled together, heat pooled between my thighs.
“It shouldn’t be like this,” he murmured, breaking away from me. His chest was rising in quick, sharp breaths, as if it made him come undone to be so near me.
“Why not?” I murmured. I met his gaze, which was still heavy-lidded with desire. “You hate me right now? Well, I don’t mind your hate when you’re here and alive.”
“I don’t hate you.” His lips nuzzled the edge of my mouth. “Hate would be simple.”
“So you love me?” I teased him. The other guys in the Northern pack had all danced around the matter of loving me, making small confessions—and teasing me for my inability to admit it myself.
He groaned. “Maybe I like it better when we don’t talk about our feelings.”
Something wild and restless sprang up in my chest. I was brave enough to walk into the ocean even though I couldn’t swim. I was brave enough to love people even though I had little practice loving and being loved.
“So don’t talk to me,” I said, and even though he was still holding me against the wall, I wrapped my bare leg around his waist to draw me toward him. He came, reluctantly, his hips swaying against mine. Even as he pressed against me, he held himself apart. He wanted me and he wanted not to want me.
