by Alicia Banks
Josselin practically ran to the library and put the journal back where she found it. She didn’t have time to really think through everything that she’d learned in it, or what it all meant. All she was focused on was getting out of there and not getting caught. She was trembling inside, afraid that he was going to pop up and ask her what she was doing.
“There you are, Josselin.”
She looked up to him at the doorway. She had a book in her hand, one from the shelf that was normal. Josselin told him that she was looking for something to read and he gave her a couple to try. He was in a rush and wanted to check in. He didn’t stay long after finding out that Ophelia was taking a nap. It was a whirlwind visit, like he knew to stop what she’d been doing.
But knew what? Josselin didn’t even know what she’d read and learned. It didn’t make any sense. How could it?
Chapter 10
“So, did you go check on her?”
Tommy was waiting for Antonio when he got back, and he scowled at him. Was it that obvious that he was so bothered by her? It felt like he shouldn’t be, but he couldn’t help it. Everything had been going fine. Josselin was reading and his daughter was taking the first nap she’d taken in weeks. It was picture perfect, thus why he had run out of there so quickly. There were no fires to put out, just a smoldering one in the corner that he was doing his best not to pay attention to.
“I had to grab something that I forgot this morning.”
“Bullshit.”
Antonio didn’t agree or disagree. Instead, he sat down at the desk and asked Tommy what he wanted.
“Snappy already. She is getting under your skin.”
“You know, Tommy, if you keep rubbing it in, I am going to find something for you to do a long way from here. You won’t see that sweet little wife of yours for a week. Then we will see who is snappy.”
Tommy pressed his lips together, in a way to show that he wasn’t going to say anything else. Antonio chuckled at that and he could see that his second wasn’t too happy about the threat. It was no secret that Tommy was head over heels for his wife of ten years. He would do anything for her and complained if he had to be away from her for a night. Antonio knew that Annalise was Tommy’s soft spot, and he wasn’t above using it if he needed to.
“Must be serious if you are going straight for the jugular. Usually, you like to play with your food first.”
Antonio smiled wider. He knew that Tommy was the only one that could challenge him like that, and it was one of the main reasons that he kept him around. He liked the challenge and he liked someone that he could bounce things off of, that wouldn’t just tell him what he wanted to hear. He had enough of those in his employ and working underneath him. Tommy was the one that wouldn’t spoon-feed him bullshit because he thought he wanted it. Instead, Tommy was the type that called him on it. A rare quality in Antonio’s life, but necessary, too.
“She is definitely getting under my skin. Does that make you feel better? Did you want me in this state?”
Tommy sighed. “Antonio, it’s been less than a day. I am sure you will be fine. You were always really good with women.”
“Women, yes, human girls, not so much.”
“Well, it can’t be that hard, for an alpha dragon like you. She’s just a human.”
Antonio knew that the words were fact, but it wasn’t said to be that way. It was another rib at the fact that he was so discombobulated when he was around her. How had Tommy known that this girl would be the one that tied him in knots? Could he really believe that it was all done on a gut feeling? That seemed less likely.
“What the hell do you want, Tommy?”
“We are having trouble from the Birch brothers. They want to renegotiate their contract.”
Antonio scoffed. “They were lucky to get the deal they got. Are you really telling me that they want more?”
Tommy agreed and Antonio told him that he would go talk to them himself. They were his supplier, but that could easily change. No one was irreplaceable.
He left to go set up the meeting and Antonio stared off for a while. Again, he should have been thinking about business, but his mind was elsewhere. It was already back at home and he wanted to be there, too.
***
Antonio got home earlier than he had in months. He wanted to believe that it was because he finally had a window to get home and see his daughter a bit earlier, but he knew that his drive was far more selfish. He smiled as soon as he saw that Josselin was there in the kitchen. His daughter was sitting on the counter, legs dangling over the edge, and she looked content to be there with Josselin. It had only been a day, but Antonio could already tell that Josselin was making a good impression on his daughter, as well. She was happy and even though she got down and gave him a hug, it wasn’t as fast, and she let go a little quicker than she had before.
Ophelia was excited to tell him about their day. She was explaining it all, the games and the play, and Antonio just smiled up at Josselin. He said something about it smelling good and popped Ophelia back on the counter, so that she could ‘help’ Josselin with dinner. Josselin had a knack of including her, and it was clear that the little girl was really blooming under all of the attention.
She didn’t have a lot of women in her life and most of the time, her nannies were a bit older, much too old to do her makeup or her hair. It was the girly things that Antonio thought she missed, and he noted that his daughter’s nails were painted, much better than when he’d done it himself.
Why did such a small thing mean so much to him?
“It’s good to see that you had a good day, Opi.”
“The best.”
Again, he felt a twinge of jealousy that made no sense. It was just that Ophelia had been only his since she was born. His wife died in childbirth and that meant that it had all been up to him. It was him who had gotten all of the ‘hero looks’ and he didn’t really like it when someone else got them, even when he could understand it completely. Josselin was amazing, and he imagined that he was looking at her like she was an angel, too.
“Well, I am glad. I was wondering if you guys were going to hit it off or not.”
Antonio was looking at Josselin and she said that she’d had a good day as well. Josselin was barely meeting his eyes and that made him wonder why. There had to be a reason, he thought to himself. Everything happened for a reason.
They had dinner and Josselin was requested to attend the sacred story time. It was the little things that he wasn’t ready for and even though it hadn’t been that long, he already felt like he was losing a part of Ophelia. Why hadn’t he felt that way with the other nannies? There had been several, but he already knew the answer to his own question. Josselin was just different.
After Ophelia was in bed, they went to the kitchen and Josselin started to pick up. He stopped her with a light hand on her arm and told her that everything was going to be okay.
“There are people that will take care of that. There is a maid, well several, and they take care of all of it. You don’t have to cook, either. I told you that we have someone to do that. Your job is to take care of Ophelia and it looks like you’re doing a great job of that. I couldn’t have asked for a better report for the first day. Her happiness is really all that matters to me.”
“She is a sweet kid. It says a lot about who raised her. She is so sweet and empathetic.”
He agreed. She was just a tender soul and he loved that about her. Antonio secretly worried that it would cause her strife when she got older, but he knew that it was a good trait to have. It was undoubtedly the same one that she had picked up from her mother. Katarina had always been the gentle one of the two of them. It was probably why she had seen the softer side of him and tried her best to bring it out. It had hardened back up since her passing, but there was now a small wonder in the back of his mind, wondering if it was possible to soften back up again. He wanted to and that felt like enough to get it all started.
“I do have to ask you
about today.”
Antonio had forgotten all about earlier that morning when she had called and freaked out about his daughter’s temperature. It wasn’t hard to see why she would, but now he had to come up with some kind of reason for it all. That was a hard thing to do, considering that he had come up with nothing all day.
“Yeah? What’s up?”
“Well, you know, about the smoothies and your daughter’s temperature. What is that all about? I don’t think I’ve ever heard of such a thing before.”
Antonio sighed inwardly and was actually glad that it was that question and not something else. He could come up with some ailment, as he had done before when asked about that very thing. The other part, the floating castle that she hadn’t been able to leave, now that was going to be a bit harder to explain away. Almost impossible, because how could he rationalize such a thing?
“Yes, well, my daughter has Vertigaolascio.”
She looked at him strangely and Antonio chuckled. “It’s a mouthful, I know, but let’s just say that she has trouble with regulating her body temperature.”
Josselin looked worried and he almost felt bad that he had said such a thing. Now, Josselin was worried about his daughter in a way that made him feel guilty for saying anything about it. Why hadn’t he come up with something different?
“Yes, she is fine. She is more tolerant of higher temperatures, as you have seen for yourself.”
Josselin agreed. “I totally freaked out. I don’t have medical training or anything, but that is the temperature where humans die.”
Antonio looked up at her all of a sudden. Why did she say it like that? he wondered. What did that mean? Did she know? And why did he feel almost a relief with the idea that she knew what was going on? It wasn’t a feeling he was supposed to have.
“Humans?”
“Yeah, you know, us.”
Josselin chuckled and he went along with it. It didn’t feel right, though. It felt like she knew too much and was messing with him. What did he really know about her?
“Yes, well, like I said, she is more tolerant of it, so it doesn’t bother her as quickly. As long as she takes her smoothies, it keeps it at a tolerant level.”
Josselin swore that she would make sure that Ophelia got the drink every morning and she apologized for not giving it to her before.
“You didn’t know.”
“Yes, but if something would have happened to your daughter…”
Josselin couldn’t even finish the sentence; she was that upset. Antonio put his arm around her, and she moved toward his chest. Antonio stood there awkwardly like that, not sure how to respond. The whole time he was hugging her to him, he was shaking inside from how close she was. She was so close, too close almost, because now he was trembling just the same. That wasn’t supposed to happen.
He pulled back like he’d been burned. It was bad enough to feel that way all of a sudden, but to feel that way from a human was just somehow inexplicable to him. Antonio didn't understand it. Why did his body betraying him hurt so badly? For a moment he wanted to kiss her so badly, his eyes kept looking to her lips. How easy would it be, to just kiss her? Would she kiss him back? That was naturally the next thing he wanted to know.
“Anyway, don't worry about it. Everything is fine. You did the right thing by calling me. I will always be around to take your call, Josselin.”
“Well, I would have left and taken her to the hospital. I'm glad I called you first.”
Antonio gently reminded her about the rules of leaving the house.
“They are important, Josselin.”
“Yes, of course, but surely those rules don't apply when it comes to a sick child?”
Antonio told her that it was the case. Antonio could get into why, but he wanted to be firm about it. He knew that she would fall to her death if she did manage to get out the front door. How badly he wished he could tell her everything, so that there would be no chance of it. He locked the doors every morning before he left, but he worried about Josselin’s curiosity. Antonio felt like Josselin was the type of person that would go to great lengths to figure something out. What would happen if that was actually what happened?
“Trust me, Josselin, just be safe inside. I will make sure that nothing happens to you or to Ophelia. That is my most important job and I take it quite seriously.”
Josselin just kind of nodded her head and she wasn't sure how to respond. He really just had no good reason for it. How could he explain to her that she was staying in a castle that was actually thousands of feet in the air, and it had a magical enchantment on it that made it so nobody could see it? That she wouldn’t believe, anyway.
Instead, he just had to leave it at what he’d said and hope that she believed him. It was a lot for the first day and some of his fears were already being realized. It was, of course, what he was worried about. An unknowing human, finding out too much. Then, he would have a lot more to deal with than just finding another babysitter. Antonio knew the rules. He knew the last thing he needed to do was get into that sort of drama.
Once Josselin stopped asking so many questions, Antonio was able to settle down and he was suddenly making them both drinks.
“I know that the rules might seem strange. I promise you, though, they are only put in place for your safety.”
“You keep saying that, but it makes me wonder what you are keeping me safe from exactly. I don’t see much danger afoot.”
Antonio sighed. Why did she have to ask so many questions?
It wasn't that she asked them, it was that he really didn't have many answers for her. That would have made it a lot easier.
“I just have enemies. I have enemies that would put you in harm's way because of that. I wish that it wasn’t so common, but it seems to be an aspect of my life that I have not been able to shake. I don't want you to be afraid, I will keep you safe, there is just certain things that I must do, to do so.”
Josselin agreed, but Antonio could see that he had bothered her. Why did he feel the need to say anything at all? Even worse, why was it so hard to lie to her? The situation they were in, him being a dragon shifter and her an unknown human that didn't even know he existed, made that kind of complicated. How many more things would he have to lie about? It was still only the first day, after all.
Chapter 11
It took Josselin about a week to go to the library and look for the journal again. She wasn't really sure what she was looking for. Maybe she was looking for a recent entry that had something to do with her. There was this weird tension between her and her employer. The more that they were around each other, the stronger it seemed to become. Josselin already knew that she was feeling a bit more than she was supposed to. He was her boss, rich, and literally lived in a castle. There was no scenario where they came together, save for her dreams and fantasies, which she was having a lot of lately.
She found the book after a little bit of looking. It was shelved and Josselin made sure that she saw exactly how it was on the shelf, before she took it off. She wanted to be able to read it and put it back, without anyone realizing it. Opehlia was taking a nap and Josselin's hands were shaking she was so scared. The crazy thing was that Josselin didn’t even know what she was afraid of. What did she think that she would find?
As much as Josselin was dying to flip to a more recent entry, there was something from before, well several somethings, but one thing in particular, that really stuck out in her head. It was something that didn't make sense to her. One of the entries that she had read was from 1959. If it was written by Antonio, that would have made him too old. Obviously, she had missed something or misread it, or there had to be some other kind of explanation. When she went to the beginning of the book and it said 1912, she was even more confused. Not because of the date, but because it was the same handwriting as the more recent ones. What did that mean?
February 3rd, 1920
Time just seems to drag on and my brother told me that a good way to keep track of
it was to write it down. He gave me this notebook and told me to take time every now and then to write down my thoughts and what was going on. Because we live so long, this way I won't forget anything. It will also give me an abundance of memories to fall back to when things get dark. Steven mentioned that no matter what we do, sometimes our minds couldn't help but go into the darkness. I told him that I would not allow myself, I couldn't as the Alpha, but he reassured me that one day, I would remember his words. I hope that he is wrong.
There were just so many inconsistencies. Josselin knew that the answer she was looking for was right there in front of her, but none of it made any sense. How could he write something in 1920? That would make him one-hundred years old. Antonio was a little bit of older than her, but he looked to only be in his mid-thirties. There was no way.
Josselin didn't know what to think about the situation. It all just seemed so impossible. She read a few more entries from the very beginning and it seemed to be a young man that was grappling with some very hard choices. It mentioned an Alpha and that he was the Alpha. Josselin wasn't really sure what that meant. It sounded like something she had read before, but it usually applied to animals, canines particularly. Why did he call himself that?
December 3rd
I messed up bad today. I lost my temper and shifted in front of a human. At first, there was a fear that I would get in trouble. Someone would find out that I had shown someone my true self. I knew that there were consequences for that. There are always consequences, but especially in revealing ourselves to a human. That is unforgivable. What happened next, what they did to the human, was even worse. I don’t know if I will ever get the sound of the man’s screams out of my head.
I learned today that consequences, even if they didn’t apply to me, can be far worse than I’d ever imagined. I won’t waste my time with humans anymore. They are nothing but trouble, and I don’t want to be responsible for another one’s death.
