by Helen Harper
‘Morning,’ I grinned. I danced round him, making sure that I wiggled my arse just enough to be super annoying.
‘Why are you so ’appy?’ he growled. ‘In’t you heard the news?’
I widened my eyes. I was in such a good mood that I didn’t even bother to comment on his lack of reasonable pronunciation. ‘No,’ I said. ‘What news?’ I clasped my heart with melodramatic zeal. ‘Are Kajagoogoo reforming?’
He watched me with a sour look. ‘What in Fey are you on about? Rubus ’as been irrrested.’ He rolled his rs to add extra emphasis to the affront.
In my mind’s eye, I imagined myself being presented with a certificate for Citizen of the Year; it helped me to achieve the perfect look of shock. ‘Oh my goodness!’ I gasped. ‘What happened? What did he do?’
‘He did nuthin’,’ Amellus grunted. ‘Would you believe pigs draggeted him away to jail because his car was nicked?’
I let my brow furrow in confusion. ‘I don’t understand.’
‘Is blatant discrimination.’
Sure it was. I rolled my eyes. ‘Because he’s a faery? The police don’t know that, though.’
Amellus glared at me for daring to contradict him. ‘Dun’t matter. Bastards took him. ’E’s our hero. ’E’s gonna save us all.’ His bottom lip jutted out and trembled. For a brief moment, I wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d started to sob. ‘I wanna go home.’
‘If he’s not done anything wrong, they can’t keep him locked up,’ I said cheerfully. More’s the pity. ‘I’m sure he’ll be back in a jiffy.’
‘S’not fair.’
‘No,’ I agreed. ‘It’s green.’
Amellus merely looked confused. ‘Huh?’
I regarded him thoughtfully. ‘You’re the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard.’
His bottom lip stopped trembling so he could glower at me with a full-faced sneer. ‘I don’t like you.’
I nodded. ‘I know. I wouldn’t worry about it, though. My brilliance is too dazzling for the likes of you. I’m to be admired, not buddied up with.’
I could see the cogs of his brain whirling for an appropriate come-back. When he was unable to think of one, he wrinkled his nose. ‘Gotta go. Guard dooty.’
It was my turn to look puzzled. ‘Dooty? What’s…’ Oh. Duty. My face cleared. He really wasn’t bright at all. ‘If Rubus isn’t here, you don’t need to guard his rooms.’
He scowled at me. ‘Even more reason for dooty. Can’t let fookers mess around with his stuff when he in’t here.’ He spun away and stomped off.
I watched him go, considering. That was interesting. What stuff was Rubus hiding away? It would definitely be worth doing some proper snooping in his rooms when I got the chance. And when this idiot wasn’t barricading them.
I reminded myself that Rubus had a mysterious Plan B should his efforts to locate Chen’s sphere fail. Perhaps the key to finding out what else he was planning was hidden away under his mattress. I added ‘sneaking around’ to my to-do list and continued on my way. I seriously doubted that the police would keep Rubus for more than another hour or two; I had to make use of his absence while I had the chance.
Tempting as it was to go poking around for other hapless insult victims whose paths I happened to cross, I managed to exercise some self-restraint and head towards the laboratory instead. Carduus was still something of a mystery to me – and I was making it my mission to discover what he was up to with all his potions, even though the guy thoroughly creeped me out. I had promised I’d show up again that morning but there was no way I was drinking his gloopy potion. I’d accidentally-on-purpose smash the bottle before it passed my lips. Carduus was so self-absorbed, he wouldn’t suspect a thing.
When I entered the laboratory, the mad Fey scientist was yet again conspicuously absent. Where on earth did he go to all the time? I walked round the perimeter of the room, examining the shelves to see if there was anything out of place or different. Was he stockpiling anything in particular? Unfortunately my superior powers of deduction weren’t giving me any useful information. After several loops, I sighed and ambled over to the papers on his desk. Various incomprehensible bits of formulae were scribbled down. I flicked through but none of them made any sense to me.
I was on the verge of abandoning the lab altogether in favour of somewhere more useful when an odd shuffling sound reached my ears. I glanced up just in time to see a piece of paper wedge itself in the gap underneath the door. A secret note!
Beaming, I hopped over and opened the door. The corridor outside was completely empty. Wrinkling my nose in vexation, I stooped and grabbed the paper. It wasn’t a missive to Carduus, though; the name scrawled on the front was mine.
I unfolded the paper and scanned it. Well, well, well.
R is growing suspicious. He’s not going to allow you the freedom to
roam around much longer. You have a day or two at most. Act quickly.
It was the same handwriting as the two previous notes but there was still no indication as to who my mysterious friend was.
I ran through various possibilities but came up short. It had to be one of the Fey who had Rubus’s ear otherwise they’d have no way knowing what he was up to. Whoever they were, they were certainly adept at keeping a low profile and acting loyal; I hadn’t had even an inkling that any of Rubus’s inner circle were anything but zealots.
The information that my movements were soon going to be curtailed didn’t exactly fill me with joy. Despite occasionally having to deal with Lunaria tagging along, I’d done well to nosy around the city and hold secret assignations with whomever I’d pleased. I’d supposed that it was because I’d done such a fabulous job of getting Rubus to trust me but perhaps what had happened with the car last night – and his subsequent arrest – had been a step too far. I’d just have to hope that Mendax didn’t delay our shifty dealings for much longer; the sooner the sphere was out of the way for good, the better.
I was so absorbed in my musings that I almost missed the approaching footsteps. In the nick of time I screwed up the paper and balled it into my palm, a split second before the door opened and Carduus’s tight features appeared.
‘Oh,’ he said with a sour twist to his mouth, ‘it’s you.’
I stretched my mouth into a grin. ‘Cardy, baby! How are you?’
He walked past me, hefting two glass bottles containing purple, swirly liquid onto the nearest table top. ‘I’d be a lot better if you didn’t keep barging into my workspace,’ he muttered. ‘But fine. Thank you.’ He turned his head towards me. ‘What do you want?’
I put my hands into my pockets, hoping my tight trousers wouldn’t display the bulge of balled-up paper, and sighed. ‘I’m getting really sick of the amnesia. You had that potion you were working on yesterday. I was hoping it was working out and you have a genuine way of curing me by now.’
He tilted his head in a manner that was eerily reminiscent of his niece, Artemesia. The comparison was remarkably unpleasant.
‘By which I mean an antidote,’ I said, ‘which isn’t likely to kill me at the same time. Or make me ill.’
‘What I had yesterday won’t work. I tested it and it’s useless. I’m not a miracle worker. I’m doing my best.’ He seemed particularly sulky this morning. ‘Rubus got himself arrested last night. I’ve had other things to do besides run around on your behalf.’
I raised an inquisitive eyebrow. ‘Is that what those bottles are for? Is it something to help Rubus?’ It seemed a stretch. The arsebadger was always going to be released with a caution, unless he already had a criminal record. That was a thought. I entertained myself briefly with the hope that this was the final strike on a long list of misdemeanours and that Morgan’s brother would be put away for a long spell. It would certainly solve a lot of problems.
‘Everything I do is to help Rubus,’ Carduus snapped.
‘Sure,’ I drawled. ‘And he’s lucky to have you.’ I arched another grin at him. ‘Not as lucky as he is to have
me, of course.’
The old faery rolled his eyes in irritation. ‘If you must know,’ he said, tapping his fingernail on the nearest bottle, ‘I’m working on a locator spell. In theory it’s quite easy to track people using a combination of magic and nature.’
I stiffened. Morgan had used dandelion seeds to track me when he’d needed to. If Carduus was doing the same, I’d never be able to escape. ‘In theory?’ I asked carefully.
He glowered. ‘I’ve not yet managed it myself. I doubt anyone could.’
I breathed out. That was something, then. Artemesia did a damned good thing when she took all those potion books with her. Without them, this old bastard really was lost.
I didn’t relax for long, however. Not when I heard what else he had to say.
‘What I have achieved, however,’ he said, ‘is a potion that will allow us to locate strong magic in objects. Living creatures mess up the equilibrium of the mixture I’ve created but it’s not living creatures that we really want to find – even if that dratted bogle is still on the loose.’
I kept my features slack, not daring to move in case I betrayed the fact that I knew Charrie was already dead. It wasn’t that which really worried me, however. ‘You’re talking about the sphere, aren’t you? The one Rubus is so desperate to get hold of.’
‘We’re all desperate to get hold of it. That sphere contains enough power to return us all to Mag Mell. It’s our salvation.’
And this demesne’s destruction. I eyed the glass bottles. ‘So will that do it?’ I enquired casually. ‘Will that liquid find the sphere?’
He grimaced. ‘It still needs some tweaking but I’m getting close.’
I licked my lips. ‘That’s … wonderful news.’ Gasbudlikins. My stomach twisted. Just how close was close? I edged over to get a closer look at this supposed wonder potion. If I managed to destroy it, how difficult would it be to replace? If only I could destroy Carduus instead. I gritted my teeth. Stupid truce.
A fresh-faced faery popped her head round the door and interrupted us. ‘Good news!’ she beamed. ‘Rubus has been let go.’
Carduus tutted. ‘I should think so too.’
I checked my watch. That was good timing. I should get out of here before Rubus returned – and I had a date with a certain slimy dragon to make. Given all that I’d just learned, the faster I made it the better.
***
According to Morgan, Mendax had demanded that we meet him at Castlefield, the location of an old Roman fort as far as the humans were concerned – and the location of a closed border crossing to Mag Mell.
‘It’s no coincidence that he picked this spot,’ I murmured. Thanks to my amnesia, I didn’t feel the ache of home as keenly as other Fey did but being here still amplified the homesickness. I could feel the dull pain in my chest blossoming outwards and throbbing through my veins. No wonder so many of us were keen to follow Rubus, with his hard-edged vow to return all faeries to our homeland. It was difficult to know that here we were almost within touching distance of home, even though it was a home I couldn’t remember. It was even more difficult to remember that all this was my fault.
Morgan lightly touched my arm. ‘Are you alright?’
‘I’m fine.’
‘Would you like another hug? I rather enjoyed the last one.’
I glanced at him. His eyes were dancing and I could feel my body being pulled towards his as if by some invisible magnet.
Then, from round a row of parked cars, Finn appeared. Darn it. ‘I’ve checked the surrounding area,’ he announced. ‘No one suspicious is here.’
‘Other than us, you mean.’
He snorted. ‘Speak for yourself.’ He glanced at Morgan. ‘Did she tell you what she did last night?’
I smiled smugly. ‘I put Rubus in jail. That’s more than either of you two geniuses have managed.’
‘What did you do? Is he still locked up?’ Morgan enquired, looking puzzled.
I waved a hand in the air. ‘The police let him go. On a technicality.’
‘The technicality being that all he did was grab a police officer,’ Finn said. ‘It’s hardly the crime of the century.’
‘Perhaps not,’ I said, spotting Mendax across the expanse of grass in front of us. ‘But he’s planning the crime of the millennium so let’s worry about that instead, shall we?’
All three of us straightened our shoulders, watching as Mendax shuffled towards us. He gave a good impression of an old man with arthritis. Given how fast he’d run away from me the first time I’d seen him, I knew better. I wondered what other secrets the old dragon was hiding.
‘I don’t trust this old bugger,’ Finn muttered.
‘I’m not sure we have much of a choice,’ I said, keeping my voice low to avoid being overheard. ‘Carduus is getting close to creating a potion that will trace the sphere. We have to put it out of action for good.’
Morgan threw me a swift, narrow-eyed look. There wasn’t time to explain further, however. The dragon was too close.
‘Greetings,’ Mendax intoned in his high-pitched voice. ‘I’m glad to see that you are all here and you are taking our negotiations seriously. This is, after all, a very serious matter.’
Morgan stepped forward, his emerald-green eyes glittering. ‘Did you bring the oath breaker?’
Mendax inclined his head. ‘I did. Did you bring the ring?’
Morgan dug into his pocket and pulled it out, displaying it for the dragon to see. There was no denying the hungry expression on Mendax’s face. Finn was right, I realised: this arsebadger of a dragon was only concerned with gold and riches to hoard for himself. We really couldn’t trust him. ‘It was not easy to get hold of.’
‘No,’ Mendax murmured, ‘I don’t suppose it was. I take it that because of the truce Rubus is still breathing, however.’
‘He is.’
The old dragon shrugged. ‘Shame.’ He reached into his pocket and took out a small box. ‘The oath breaker you desire is in here.’
Finn started forward as if to take it but Mendax pulled it just out of reach. ‘This exchange is purely to establish trust. You understand that we are here for something far more important.’
‘The sphere,’ I ground out.
‘Indeed.’ He turned his coal-black eyes to me. ‘Have you … found it?’
Morgan cleared his throat. ‘Let’s just say we’re getting close. It will depend on how effective this oath breaker of yours actually is.’
Mendax bared his teeth in a nasty grin. ‘If you follow the instructions, I think you’ll find that it’s very effective indeed. Why don’t we make the exchange and meet again this time tomorrow?’
‘That can be arranged.’ Morgan didn’t move. ‘Not here, though.’
The dragon lifted his head and laughed; the sound was particularly grating.
I walked past Morgan and up to Mendax, pausing right in front of him and gazing curiously at his hair. ‘I was wondering how you comb that mess of yours so that the horns don’t show,’ I said.
The laughter ceased abruptly. ‘I suppose you think you’re funny.’
‘No,’ I told him. ‘I’m just mean.’
‘You said it.’ Mendax sniffed. ‘Well, I’m not the devil and I don’t have horns. You know who the real devil is and you have an inkling about what hell will be unleashed if he gets his hands on Chen’s sphere. I can stop that. Whether you allow me to is up to you.’
I curled my bottom lip and grabbed the box, twisting away before he could protest. As I walked back, Morgan tossed the ring towards him. ‘There,’ he said. ‘You have the ring and we have the oath breaker. If it works, we’ll meet you tomorrow in front of the main library.’
‘And you’ll bring the sphere?’
‘If we can find it.’
‘You’d better,’ Mendax growled. ‘If you don’t, all this will cease to exist.’ He raised his hand and wiggled his fingers. ‘Toodle-oo.’ He twisted round and shambled away.
The three of us watched hi
m go. ‘Despite his words,’ Finn muttered, ‘I get the impression that he couldn’t give a fuck if this demesne is destroyed. He just wants the sphere.’
‘He promised to destroy it.’
Finn gave me a long look. ‘Do we believe that?’
I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. ‘Do we have a choice?’
Chapter Nineteen
Artemesia examined the box with a critical eye. ‘It’s very small,’ she said. ‘Have you opened it?’
I hopped up onto a stool. ‘We thought we’d wait and let you do it,’ I said with forced cheeriness. ‘You know, in case it’s actually a bomb or something. That way you’ll be the one to get blown up.’
She glared at me. ‘You’re just charm personified, aren’t you?’
Morgan stepped in before matters could escalate. ‘Madrona is complicated.’
Finn snorted. ‘That’s one way of describing her.’
Morgan frowned. ‘I can open the damned box, Arty. We just thought it was wise to let you see it first.’
I exhaled loudly. ‘Give it to me. I’m the superhero. I’ll martyr myself so the rest of you can live. I expect statues and songs and my own public holiday in return, though.’
‘You’re not getting the public holiday,’ Finn declared. ‘If anyone’s getting the public holiday, it’ll be me and my brothers.’
‘FinnWinnJinn Day?’ I shook my head. ‘It’ll never catch on.’
‘It’s a hell of a lot better than Mad Day.’
I put my hands on my hips. ‘Mad Day is catchy. Mad Day in Madchester.’
A muscle ticked in Morgan’s cheek. ‘Both of you are being stupid. Can we please focus on what’s important? Besides, we all know it will be Morgan Day.’
Artemesia stared at the three of us. ‘Is this condition contagious?’ she enquired. ‘Because I like my ego where it is, thank you very much.’
