by K. Webster
This company is a scam.
This card usually offers good rates at first but raises them to 28% later.
Don’t apply for this one.
Credit cards lead to debt, which you don’t need.
There are get well cards from some family members and friends. All of which she writes that I need to text them a thank you. I find a few hospital bill receipts, and out of curiosity, actually open those to see what kind of debt I owe Garrett. Not that he’s made any move to ask me to pay him back.
I open one hospital receipt and nearly throw up my steak.
Three hundred thousand dollars.
Just for my stay at the hospital. That’s not even including the surgeries or therapies. Holy fuck. I collect all the bills and put them in a stack to open later. I’ll have to give this guy half my paycheck for the rest of my life and I’ll still never pay him back. Makes me feel like shit about it too.
With a heavy sigh, I dig until I find some letters.
From Lacey.
“What the fuck?” I mutter.
Now I feel like an idiot for avoiding this until now. She’s probably written to me to tell me where she’s at. That Jack’s an abusive asshole. I could have gotten to the bottom of this a long time ago. Maybe I would’ve been told Zella was mine long before I made that conclusion myself after Christmas.
I dig through the whole box, finding all the letters to me, sorting them in order of when they’re postmarked. They started a year ago, months before my accident. I remember Grandma texting me while I was at OSU telling me I had some letters. I didn’t even respond because letters feel ancient when you could text. I assumed they were from family or some shit.
I open the first letter, my chest tightening with unease.
Terrence,
It’s your right to be mad at me. I’m sorry it took me so long to write this. I’ve been unable to find the courage to until now. I thought it was better this way. That we were safer. Truth is, it’s not. I’m scared and it’s not just me to think about. There’s no other way to tell you this. You have a daughter. Zella Teejay Henderson. She’ll be four at the end of April. I’m sorry. I have no other words for you. I’ve written my address. I don’t have a phone and it’d be best if you didn’t write back. Just come visit us. Who knows, maybe we might come back with you.
Lacey
I read the letter several more times, confirming that Zella is indeed my daughter. Holy shit. I knew. I just had a gut feeling, but seeing this has my heart expanding, wanting that little girl in my life right the fuck now. I open the next letter that’s a month later.
Terrence,
I can tell you’re mad, but Zella doesn’t deserve this. She needs her father. I am fine with you not wanting to have anything to do with me, but I can’t stand by and let you ignore her. Please. It’s imperative you come here. Meet her. Don’t abandon her, T.
Lacey
Her letter pisses me off. She’s the one who abandoned me, not the other way around. I was completely enamored with Lacey. We had real potential to be something. She upped and left, leaving me to nurse my broken heart. I didn’t even have a chance to love Lacey. She couldn’t even give me that. And now she’s throwing out accusations of abandonment over snail mail? This bitch has some nerve.
Irritated, I rip open the next letter that comes a few weeks later.
Terrence,
I gave her the middle name of Teejay. After you. Terrence James. He doesn’t know that. It’s my “fuck you” to him. I don’t get them very often, but when I do, it feels good. I’m sorry about my last letter. I was upset. Please come to us. Come get us. I don’t have a number and please don’t write. Just show up. I’ll go back to Hood River with you. We can be a family.
Lacey
The desperation in this letter has guilt flooding through me. She’s obviously talking about Jack. It unnerves me to think about what that asshole could have been doing to her. Quickly, I rip open another letter that’s dated a week later.
Terrence,
She’s such a sweet girl. Too quiet for her age. Unfortunately, she’s learned that when her mouth is closed, she doesn’t get into trouble. I hate this life for her. I hate that she has to fear speaking because of what he will do. I can’t live like this. The last time I tried to leave, it ended badly. I’m no match for him, T. I need you to come to us. Just get the three of us and we’ll leave that bastard. Then, we can go to the cops or whatever. I just need you to come to us. I didn’t want to write this in the letter in case it got returned back to me somehow and got in his hands, but I’m desperate. We need a savior.
I didn’t want to leave you that night. I knew we were moving to Florida and I just couldn’t tell you. All I wanted was one single good night in my life. Just one. You were it. I still owe you breakfast. If you come to us, I’ll buy you breakfast every day. I swear to you. If not for me, do this for Zella. She needs her daddy.
Lacey
Rage boils my blood. She was scared to death and I was living my best life in college. And now that motherfucker has stolen her daughter away. There’s one letter left and I’m afraid to open it. It’s dated the day of my accident.
Terrence,
I’m pregnant.
I’m disgusted and embarrassed and horrified. I don’t want his baby, but what choice do I have? It was bad enough with one child to shield from him. But two? I’m going to try to come see you. We might have to hide out for a bit. Mom is helping me formulate a plan. It has to go just right or he’ll take Zella away from me. I can’t lose her. Hopefully we’ll see you soon.
Lacey
My hands are shaking as I take pictures of each letter and send them to Samantha. The phone rings not ten minutes later.
“Hey, baby,” Samantha purrs into the line. “Looks like you just got me the proof I need to get this paternity test done by tomorrow morning. I’ll keep you posted.”
“He hurt her,” I choke out. “He clearly hurt her. They need to arrest him.”
Her sigh crackles through the line. “Who?”
“Jack!”
“I know, but a judge won’t. She doesn’t name him. Simply hints. It could be a boyfriend or a neighbor or a friend. We don’t know without a shadow of a doubt that it’s Jack Henderson.”
Un-fucking-believable.
“He fucking kidnapped her daughter—our daughter! She’s out there pregnant with her stepfather’s kid, scared shitless of him, and you’re telling me we have no proof?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying,” she says in a calm tone. “But I’m going to speak with the PI. Now that we have an address, he can find out more information. Just let the law do its job for now. We’re getting Zella back for you.”
“What about Lacey?”
“One problem at a time, Terrence.”
Penny
I’ve spent all evening, while Jack was off doing whatever it is he does, trying to coax out answers from Zella. I know she likes and trusts me, but she clams up any time I mention her mother. It breaks my heart for her.
“Does your dad ever hurt you?” I ask, hating that I even have to refer to Jack as her father.
Her brows furl and she looks down at her lap, shrugging.
“You can trust me. You know that, right? We tell each other secrets.” I take one of her small hands in mine. “You didn’t tell on me that you already knew me. You call me Penelope instead of Penny when your dad is around. I won’t tell anyone.”
When she doesn’t speak, her body trembling, I know it’s from fear. She’s afraid he’ll somehow find out. It pisses me off that he’s got her mind warped so badly.
“Did you know daddies are supposed to be kind and gentle and funny?” I ask, squeezing her hand. “My dad is a hero. A doctor. You were going to see him once, but then your dad got mad and took you away. Remember?”
She nods, her brown eyes lifting to mine. It kills me how much she looks like Terrence. Same soulful eyes filled with pain. With Terrence, he nearly died from an acc
ident and remained in a coma. It’s his reason. Hers is Jack. It’s terrible that a child should be so afraid.
“Want to hear a bedtime story?”
Her lips curl into a sweet smile. “Yes.”
“Once upon a time there was a beautiful queen. She had blond hair,” I say, tugging at one of her curls. “She found a handsome king with skin the color of yours.”
A small giggle escapes her, warming cold parts of my heart I never knew existed.
“One day, they had a lovely little princess who had hair like her mother and skin like her father. Everyone thought she was the most beautiful girl in all the land, especially Knight Penny.” I grin at her. “Then something terrible happened. An evil dragon stole the queen and princess. He took them far, far away. The king was under a magical spell, fast asleep, so he didn’t even know they were missing!”
“That’s sad,” she whispers.
“It’s okay. The king was strong and he woke up. He made a friend with Knight Penny and together they decided they would slay the dragon, save the princess, and find the queen.”
Her brown eyes twinkle. “What happened? Did they live happily ever after?”
The front door slams, rattling all the windows in the house, making us both cry out in surprise.
“It’ll have a happy ending,” I quickly reassure her. “I’ll tell you the rest another day.”
I turn off her lamp and nearly run into Jack as I exit her room. He peers into the darkness. “Was she well behaved?”
“A perfect little princess.”
“Hmph. Right.”
“Shh,” I admonish. “She’s asleep.” I pull the door closed and start for the living room. It creeps me out that he follows me, but it gets him away from Zella’s room, which makes me happy.
“The other day I was drunk,” he says. “I didn’t drink much tonight. Didn’t want you to think I was always an asshole.”
I force a smile. “Okay.”
He studies me for a long moment and then pulls some money out of his pocket. “Zella likes you. I like you. You might just become a permanent fixture one day.” His words are meant as a joke, but I don’t like them.
“It’s late. I need to go home.”
He sighs. “I said I was sorry, Penelope.”
“Okay,” I say again, keeping my expression neutral. “See you around.”
His hand curls around my bicep, making the blood freeze in my veins. “I’m just a lonely man. I didn’t mean to hurt or offend you.”
“Good night, Jack.”
I tug my arm free and he lets go. My heart hammers in my chest as I race to my Jeep. There has to be a way to make my story come true for Zella. I want to be her knight in shining armor who saves her from the monster in her world and returns her to her parents.
That sweet girl deserves it.
The door is unlocked at Cal’s cabin, but the lights are off. After locking the door behind me, I blindly find my way to Terrence’s room. Dad wasn’t keen on me spending the night again “with Charlotte,” especially after this weekend and then today at school, but I wasn’t asking. I was telling. He knows I do what I want.
Light shines from the crack under Terrence’s door. Relief floods through me that he waited up for me even though it’s almost midnight. I push open the door and frown to see the mess everywhere. Terrence is sitting on the bed, leaned against the headboard, a stack of letters in his hand. He’s shirtless and in his boxers, which is distracting because he looks so good, but it’s his face that draws my attention.
Something about his expression kills me.
Despondent.
Devastated.
Hopeless.
I drop my bag and keys to the floor after closing the door and walk over to the bed. He doesn’t stop me as I clean off all the mail and move the box off the bed. His eyes don’t lift, even when I shed my clothes and crawl into bed next to him, wearing nothing but my panties.
“Hey,” I murmur, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “What’s wrong?”
He hands me the letters in his hand. “She’s been trying to reach me.”
I take the letters and read the first one. It takes me a few moments to read through them all. Dread twists inside me for reasons unknown to me.
“This proves you’re the father,” I say softly. “Zella is yours.”
“Which we already knew. You saw her that day,” he reminds me. “She looks just like me. I hate that she’s there all alone with him. We don’t know what kind of shit he does to her.”
I have a pretty good idea.
And she’s not always alone. Sometimes she has her knight.
“Samantha can do something with this, right? She can help?”
“I’ve already called her and sent her copies. She thinks she’ll have approval by tomorrow,” he murmurs.
“That’s great news,” I rush out. “Then we can bring her home.”
He takes the letters, stares at them for a long moment, and then sets the stack down on the end table. “We have to find her.”
Lacey.
He wants to find Lacey.
“I think she’s hiding because she’s pregnant and scared.” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “She begged for me to come save her. I didn’t know. Penny, I didn’t know.”
“Shh,” I murmur, curling around him to give him comfort. “We’ll find her.”
And then what?
Will Lacey want to make up for lost time with him? Be a family?
Zella deserves that. Just like in her story. Problem is, that story fucking sucks for me.
“If I’d known, I would have gone there to save them,” he murmurs. “I would have. I wouldn’t have left them all alone. I hate that she thinks I abandoned them when they needed me.”
“But you didn’t know,” I whisper.
He’s quiet for a long time. Then, he flips off the lamp, scoots down in the bed, and pulls the covers up. I remain sitting up for a few minutes, wondering if I should stay or leave. For the first time since I’ve started this relationship with Terrence, I don’t feel wanted.
It fills me with dread.
Sick, oily dread.
The thought of not having this thing between us evolve into more feels like a bad joke. A tease. Nothing but a tiny glimpse into a future I truly wanted but wasn’t meant to have.
I don’t belong with him.
She does.
I start to slide off the bed, but a strong hand grips my bare thigh. “Don’t leave me, baby. I need you.”
My heart does a chaotic tremble. I slip back under the covers, lying flat on my back. He rolls on top of me, his lips fusing to mine in a needy way. His body finds its way between my thighs, spreading me open for him. The moment his cock rubs against me through our clothes, I let out a whimper.
“I want you,” I plead. “Please.”
“You’re not ready,” he murmurs.
I slide my palm beneath his boxers, gripping his firm ass. One of my hands slips between us and I pull his cock out of the front of his underwear. He grunts, thrusting against my hold on him. I try to imagine what it would feel with him inside me, stretching me to my limit. It sounds terrifying, yet also oddly thrilling.
I want it.
I want him.
He grips my hand, pulling it off his dick, to bring my palm to his lips. His kiss is sweet and gentle, but the way his bare cock grinds against my pussy that’s covered by a thin layer of material is anything but gentle.
“Fuck, you make me insane for you,” he growls, pinning my wrist against the pillow above my head.
With my free hand, I pull my panties aside, needing to feel him against me. His hard, thick cock slides against my bare clit, sending shivers rioting through me.
“Penny,” he practically snarls. “You’re not ready.”
To prove his point, he rubs the tip of his dick along my slick slit, teasing at my entrance. I freeze, unable to move or speak. All I can focus on is the ragged sounds of our breathing.
&nb
sp; It’s noisy.
Too noisy.
“I want you,” I whimper. “But I’m scared to do…that.”
He leans forward, kissing my mouth. “I know, baby. What if we do something else? You trust me to make you feel good?”
“Yes,” I breathe. “Please.”
He sits up and then grabs something from the bedside drawer. I can’t hear what he’s doing, but I hear a cap open. “I’m getting my dick nice and slick,” he explains, the darkness hiding his actions from me. “If it’s too much, tell me to stop and I will.”
He maneuvers my legs until they’re up in the air, the backs of my thighs pressed against his chest. I feel exposed, but I do trust Terrence. He said we weren’t having sex. That calms me down because I know he’ll stay true to his word. His thick cock slides between my thighs and comes up, rubbing along my clit.
Oh, God, that feels good. It’s so slippery.
He grips my thighs, pressing them together. It’s then I realize he’s going to fuck my thighs while rubbing his dick against my clit. It’s almost like sex, but not scary. No, it feels really good for me and based on the feral grunts coming from him, he must love it too.
“Touch your tits, Penny. Pinch those nipples. Pretend they’re my teeth.”
“That’s weird,” I say with a smile.
“Nah, baby, this is weird, but you’ll like it.” The cold lube splatters on my chest. “Rub on them now.”
I grumble in faux annoyance that he got me messy, but the second my fingers slick across my nipples, rubbing the lube in, I see stars.
“Oh my God,” I whimper.
He chuckles. “Told you. Now let’s pretend I’m fucking you so hard you won’t be able to walk for a week.”
It’s easy to pretend with all the pleasure assaulting me all at once. Although, there’s an aching emptiness I wish he would fill. I may be afraid to take this step, but I still want him. That want doesn’t disappear.
As he fucks my thighs, he grips my ass, lifting me up for a better angle and spreading my cheeks. His balls slap against my ass with each thrust. We’re both sweating as he drives us closer and closer to climax.
