by Raven Steele
At the front of the room, a tall professor in a tailored suit introduced himself as Mr. Liddel. Claire listened to him talk about the college’s history, but soon her mind drifted to the letter she’d crammed into her bag. The top corner of the envelope was sticking out the top. So much money! But was it dirty? The last thing she wanted was to get involved with anything remotely shady.
Claire returned her attention to the professor. He was explaining the day’s schedule: tours, meetings with faculty, a meet and greet with other students. Just then Logan looked back at her and winked. She smiled and winked back. Maybe he’d know what she should do with the money.
When it came time for lunch, Claire separated from Kate and Steph to find Logan. He was just leaving an advisor’s office when she spotted him.
"Logan!" Claire called from down a hall.
He turned around and she reared back in surprise when she saw what he was wearing: a black Bandon High hoodie. He walked over to her, yawning.
“What’s with the shirt?” she asked.
He smoothed his chest with his palms and smiled. “I thought I’d represent our old school.”
“Did you go straight home after the concert last night?”
“Yeah, why?”
She paused, looking at him. It could’ve been anyone watching her and Kate. Lots of people had the same shirt, and as far as she knew Logan had never lied to her.
"Are you staying here for lunch?" she asked.
He shrugged. "Unless you guys want to go off campus. I’m game either way."
“Kate and Steph already left. I was hoping we could talk over lunch?"
He smiled and opened his arms. “I already know what you’re going to ask me, and the answer is yes. I will be your man for the rest of your life.”
She punched him in the arm. "This is serious. I really need some advice."
Logan searched her eyes and nodded. “Let’s go.”
After purchasing food in the cafeteria, Claire followed Logan outside, wondering how best to approach the subject. It wasn’t just the money that was bothering her. It was the conversation at Bodian about the missing vials, the crazy threats from Gary, the footprints at her window, and the lone figure wearing the Bandon High sweatshirt. Somehow she felt it was all connected.
"So what's this about?" Logan said as they sat down on the grass.
Claire popped open her soda can and unwrapped a sandwich. More from habit than a desire to eat.
"Do you think a drug could seriously change a person?" she asked.
Logan laughed. "Are you already experimenting?"
She shook her head. “Of course not. That’s not what I mean at all.”
“Then what do you mean?”
Claire sighed and tugged at a blade of grass, imagining what Bodian’s drug might do to someone if they digested it.
“Claire?”
She looked up into Logan’s concerned expression, then broke several green blades. “This morning I found some money, well, more like it was given to me."
"It can't be both. Either you found it or it was given to you."
She cleared her throat. "I found it on my doorstep, left anonymously. In an envelope with my name on it."
"How much money?"
"$800."
He whistled. "That's a lot."
"I know. It's exactly what we need to go to the Fire and Ice concert."
Logan leaned forward, elbows propped on knees. "Someone's obviously looking out for you. So what's wrong?"
"Whoever it was left a note."
"What'd it say?"
She removed it from her bag and tossed it to him. He read it a few times before he said, "I still don't see what the problem is."
She sighed. "A few days ago, I also found muddy footprints on my back porch and muddy fingerprints on my window. And I think whoever it was came again last night. There are other things too. Seriously, I feel like someone’s watching me." Claire crossed her legs. "Then all of a sudden there’s this money, and on the morning news I heard a gas station was robbed."
"I heard about that, too. Messed up. So you think it's all connected?"
"I don't know. I just have a weird feeling about it.” She glanced at Logan. He was looking at her with his mouth turned down, like he was trying to follow her line of reasoning. She realized it was a weak argument without including the Bodian part, but Gary’s threat still scared her and she wasn’t about to risk someone she knew getting hurt.
“What else are you not telling me?” he asked as if he’d read her mind.
She averted her eyes. “Nothing. Why do you say that?”
“Because you have that look. Like that time you showed up at the restaurant where I was waiting for a date. You found out she was going to stand me up and you didn’t want me to feel bad. Remember? You told me she didn’t come because she was sick.”
She winced. “You found out about that?”
He nodded.
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because I knew you were just trying to protect me. I thought it was sweet.”
She turned away from his intense stare.
“You have that same look now,” he said. “Like you’re trying to protect me from something.”
Claire thought fast. “It’s nothing. Really. Maybe I’m making too big of a deal out of all this.”
Logan patted her leg. "First thing first. We need to figure out who's been at your house in the middle of the night. That’s messed up. I'll come by later tonight to see if I can find any clues and to make sure your house is secure. As for the money, maybe you should set it aside for a while. See if anyone comes forward. When's the deadline for the concert?"
"Two weeks."
"Then wait it out. Who knows? Maybe it was Smith. I can see him doing something like that.”
Her dad’s old friend. Why didn’t she think of that? "Maybe. But the letter doesn’t sound like something he’d write. I'll ask him about it later, though."
"Don't worry. Everything will work out. You're a good person."
"But if I end up keeping the money and it was stolen or even given to me by some weirdo, won't that be wrong?"
His eyes narrowed. "What's with you?"
"What do you mean?"
"Since when do you care about things like this? What happened to bad-ass Claire?"
She swallowed and twisted the toe of her shoe into the ground. "That dead girl. Mindy. She sort of put things into perspective for me. Life can just end."
Logan squeezed her arm gently. "Nothing's going to happen, I promise. As for the money, don't think about it for a while. I bet you'll find it was simply a gift."
Claire looked up at the sudden cawing of a crow in the branches above her. Chills raced up her arms.
"I hope you’re right,” she said.
Chapter 9
They were almost home from Northwestern, when Kate turned down the radio and asked, "So when are you going to sign us up?"
Claire glanced back at Steph in the backseat. She was smiling big. Clearly Kate had already told her. "I don't know if I am."
"Are you freaking kidding me?" Steph said. "Someone gives us exactly what we need, and you don’t take it?"
Claire gritted her teeth. "First of all, nobody gave us anything. They gave it to me, and I don't know if I feel comfortable taking money from a potential psycho."
"What are you talking about?" Steph asked.
Claire turned to Kate. "You didn't tell her the whole truth, did you?"
Kate moaned. "What does it matter where the money came from? We need it!"
"Not if it comes with strings attached.”
"Would someone please tell me what's going on?" Steph asked.
“I'll fill you in later,” Kate said, glancing at her in the rearview mirror.
Claire placed her foot on the dashboard. "Look guys, let me wait a couple of weeks to see if I can find out who gave it to me, and then I'll decide what to do with it."
"What are you
going to do with the money in the meantime?" Kate asked.
Claire was getting sick of this conversation. "Stuff it under my bed or something."
The car was silent, the air thick with tension. Claire waited for Kate to say more, to press the issue, but instead she glanced at Claire sideways, her lips turning up.
“So what was Ethan doing at orientation?” she asked. “I didn’t know he was going to Northwestern.”
Claire lowered her foot and straightened. “He is?”
“And he was checking you out,” Steph said. She drummed her fingers against the back of the passenger seat, tapping out the rest of the earlier awkward tension.
“How did I not see him?” Claire wondered out loud. She was surprised Ethan was going to school at Northwestern. Last she heard he had scholarships to at least a dozen schools.
“He sure saw you!” Kate laughed. “We noticed him when we came back from lunch. He was watching you and Logan on the grass.”
"Did he look mad?" Claire couldn't stand jealous guys.
"Not really,” Steph said. “Just interested. I think he really likes you."
"I'm going out with him tonight," she blurted.
Kate punched her hard, the car nearly swerving off the road. "Get out!"
Claire rubbed her arm and grinned.
"When did this happen?" Kate asked.
"At the concert."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Kate aimed for Claire’s arm again, but she dodged the punch.
"I don't know. I thought you might be mad, seeing how he's Corey’s friend."
Kate stared off into the distance. "I couldn’t care less about Corey.”
"Please, Kate. You still have it for him bad.” Kate opened her mouth to speak, but Claire cut her off. “So this new girl you mentioned to replace Logan. Is she any good?"
The less Kate talked or thought about Corey, the better.
Kate didn’t miss a beat. "Audrey's decent. It'll take a little time for her to learn our stuff, but I think you'll like her."
"When do I get to meet her?"
"She'll be at Steph's later today for practice."
"Nice. I'll be a little late, though. I’m going to talk to Smith to see if he’s the one who left the money. Think you can drop me off at the police station?"
Kate nodded as if she were considering him as the benefactor and then turned off the freeway. "Sure. And when you find out he's the one who gave you the money, will you sign us up already?"
"Of course.”
Ten minutes later Kate pulled up to the curb in front of the city courthouse. “Do you need me to come back to give you a ride to practice?’
Claire stepped out of the car. "That’s okay. Smith or one of the other cops can give me a ride."
After Kate and Steph said goodbye, Claire turned around and headed up the steps to the courthouse. It was the newest building in all of Bandon, built just last year. It still smelled like paint and new carpet. She turned left into the section that led to the police department.
"Hey, Claire. How's it going?" an officer asked when she opened a glass door and stepped inside.
"Good. Is Smith in his office?"
"Yeah. Go on back."
Several officers said hello as she made her way down a hall and around a corner. She knew most people didn't like policemen, especially kids her age, but she loved these guys. Not only were they there for her during her troubles a couple of years ago, but every year for Christmas they always gave her a basket of goodies.
She knocked on Smith’s door.
"Come in," a deep voice said.
Claire opened the door and entered Smith’s office. It was much larger than his last one and could actually hold more than two people in it comfortably.
Smith stood up and smiled making his red cheeks puff out. "How are you, Claire?"
His smile always made her smile. He wasn't super tall, barely six feet, but the way he stood, head held high, chest out, made him seem much taller. But what she loved most was the kindness in his hazel eyes that always looked upon her as if she were someone he truly cared about, like a father would a daughter.
"I'm hanging in there," she said and sat down across from him on a padded chair.
He returned to his seat behind a desk. "You haven't been in any fights lately, have you?"
She shook her head. "Nope. I've been a good girl."
"Good. What brings you by?"
"I want to ask you something."
He set aside a stack of papers and leaned forward, elbows resting on the desk. "Shoot."
"Um, well, did you happen to leave me money on my doorstep last night? Like as a gift?"
He shook his head. "Not me."
"Are you sure? Cause you can tell me. You won't be ruining any anonymous charitable act or anything."
"Really. It wasn't me. I wish I could say it was. Did the person leave any kind of a note?"
"Yeah, but it just said, ‘Giving you what you need.’"
He frowned. "And what is it that you need?"
"I assumed it's about the entry fee for the band competition."
"That's right! How's the fund raising going anyway?”
"I have it now, thanks to my anonymous donor last night." Claire searched his face for any sign of deceit but found none. He seemed to know nothing about it.
"Well that was very generous of someone. When's the big event?"
They continued to talk for several minutes of nothing important. She considered telling him how much money was given to her and her concerns that it was related to the robbery, but in the end she didn’t. Maybe if she couldn’t figure out who it was, then she’d come back.
Because Smith still had to work, he had another officer drop Claire off at Steph’s house for practice. Everyone was already in the garage, including the new girl, Audrey.
“Nice to finally meet you,” Claire said. Audrey had short, black hair, combed high in the back with sweeping bangs across her forehead. Wearing torn jeans and a black t-shirt, it looked like Audrey had raided her closet.
Audrey shook her hand. “Thanks again for asking me to be a part of your band,” she answered, more like yelled.
Claire stepped back, surprised, and looked at Steph and Kate who were trying not to laugh.
“Why are you yelling?” Claire asked her.
Audrey’s green eyes widened. "Am I? Sorry. I live with my mom and she's hard of hearing. I grew up always having to talk loud.” Her voice was quiet at first, but the more she spoke the louder it got.
Kate’s giggling turned into full-on laughter. Claire looked at her for just a second before she joined in. She couldn’t help it. Fortunately, Audrey and Steph laughed too. And for a moment Claire forgot all about Bodian and the money on her porch.
"You're early," Claire said to Ethan just minutes after she got home from practice. He was standing on her porch leaning up against the rail.
"I can come back if you're busy," he said, straightening.
"It's fine. I'm not doing anything. Come in.”
"Cool. Thanks." He walked into the house, hands stuffed in his pockets.
Claire sat on the couch, but he remained standing, glancing around like he’d walked into a doily museum.
Not one to beat around the bush, she said, "You look uncomfortable. What's up?"
His face reddened. "Nothing. I'm fine." He removed his hands and sat next to her. "It's just weird being here."
"Why's that?"
"Well, ever since you decked me and told me to go screw myself, I figured you'd hate me for life."
Claire laughed. "What are you talking about?"
"You don't remember?"
She shook her head. "Drawing a blank."
"Sophomore year in high school, in the lunch room. You were fighting with Corey. I saw that he was getting really angry and I thought he was going to hit you, so I jumped up to get in between you two, but ended up tripping and running into you instead. I think you thought I deliberately shoved you or something
because you freaked out and decked me."
Claire leaned back into the couch cushions. "I remember now.”
That had been a particularly hard time for her, and she’d been extra volatile. Valerie had just died. And then she’d gone to the police about her father. She shook her head, wanting to forget, and turned to Ethan. “Is that why you haven’t talked to me the last couple of years?"
He inhaled deeply. On his exhale his shoulders sagged. “I was just giving you what you wanted. The last thing you needed was more grief.”
“What I wanted? What are you talking about?”
“You asked me to stay away from you.”
“No, I didn’t.”
Ethan closed his eyes as if trying to recall details from the past. “Shortly after that incident, I called you to apologize but your phone had been shut off—”
“I didn’t want to talk to anyone for awhile.”
“—so I came by your house. Your mother answered the door and when I asked to see you, she said you didn’t want to see me. Ever. There were more words but I don’t remember them, or maybe I don’t want to. I let a week go by and then tried again. I was pretty sure you were home because you hadn’t been to school for awhile.”
Ethan looked at her as if waiting for an explanation, but she said nothing. It had taken Claire almost three weeks before she felt like she could face her peers at school, more like gain the strength she knew she’d need.
Kate had told her about the many rumors, about why kids thought her dad was in jail. Some thought it was because he’d put Valerie out of her misery as if she were a wounded dog, but others thought he’d beat up his wife after discovering a scandalous affair. Claire didn’t want to confirm one way or the other so when an older classmate wouldn’t stop harassing her about the truth, Claire threw a fist—the first of many.
She shook her head, trying to forget. “I don’t remember you coming by, and I know I didn’t tell my mother those things.”
“But what about my letter?”
“What letter?”
“On my third and final visit, I asked your mom to give you a letter. In it I apologized and asked if we could simply be friends. I wanted to be there for you any way I could. I also said that if you didn’t respond, then I’d honor your wishes and leave you alone. You never responded.”
