He doesn’t answer me. I peer out my bedroom door, and I don’t see him. Weird.
I walk out of my room, and he is looking into the bathroom. Please tell me that I remembered to close the shower curtain. I twist my hands behind my back, a nervous habit. He finally looks away from the bathroom. I see sadness in his eyes.
“Adeline, why didn’t you tell me you were struggling?” he says softly.
I sit on the edge of my couch. My stomach is in knots. I never wanted anyone to know that I was anything but okay.
Techy sits down beside me. “Adeline, are you okay?” He stops for a minute, touching my back. “You always seem so happy, like it radiates off of you.”
I look at him. “I am happy around you guys, you make me happy. I don’t want Alisha to think, for one second, that I live with these demons. And I don’t want her to know about the guilt I feel over what she suffered. She doesn’t need that burden.”
Techy shakes his head. “You can’t have this guilt inside of you, Adeline, you were a victim. I know horrible things have happened to you, but don’t for one second have guilt about Alisha, it was out of your control.”
I lower my head, crying, the pain in my heart easing just a little. I never knew how much I needed to hear those words. It’s like a balm over my heart.
“Thank you, Techy,” I whisper. His arms are tight around me. “You’re so good to my daughter.”
“I love her, she is my world.”
That brings a smile to my face. My life before all of this was a blur. It didn’t even feel like my life; I was just going through the motions.
“Come, let’s get out of here and to the club house.” Techy helps me off the couch, and I walk into my bedroom. I shut the door behind me, giving me a few seconds to myself.
I look into my vanity mirror and smile at myself. I opened myself up just a little bit. I feel like this is a huge step in the right direction for me.
I feel much lighter after letting him know the guilt I struggle with. Who wouldn’t feel guilty? But I am starting to realize I was a victim too. My life was stolen from me.
Not anymore.
Konrad Page 17
