by Tanya Bird
‘He offered me an amount of my choosing in return for your freedom.’
One of the swords slipped from Brei’s hand, landing next to her foot. ‘Oh.’ That was some gesture. ‘And what did you say?’
‘I told him I would think on the matter.’ He looked ready to fall over with excitement. ‘What on earth would make him offer such a thing?’ He ran a hand down his face. ‘Gods, tell me you did not threaten the life of his family or something.’
‘Of course not.’
‘Am I supposed to believe this is simply an act of generosity?’
‘You’re the one who keeps telling me what a good man he is.’
‘Even good men do not make open-ended offers like that.’
What explanation was she supposed to give when she did not fully understand Nerva’s motives herself?
Gallus’s eyes narrowed. ‘Did you lie with him, perhaps?’
She tilted her head. ‘Must sex be the driving force behind everything?’
‘There are kind gestures and there are grand gestures.’
‘I wouldn’t get too excited. He will change his mind when the guilt passes.’
Gallus looked taken aback by her words. ‘Guilt? For what, may I ask?’
She wished she had not said it aloud. ‘I don’t know.’
‘Explain yourself.’
She looked around, trying to form an answer. ‘Invading my home? Killing people I love, perhaps?’ She walked off towards the weapons room. As expected, Gallus hurried after her.
‘Roman soldiers do not invade, they conquer. The only thing Nerva Papias is feeling is pride at his accomplishments.’
‘Is that what he said?’
‘It is what I know. What I do not know is why he feels this sense of obligation towards you.’
She drew a breath, knowing Gallus would not stop hounding her until he had a proper answer. ‘I told you that he spared my life a few times.’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, it was sort of mutual.’
He was struggling to keep up with her pace. ‘What do you mean, mutual?’
‘I helped him also.’
Gallus grabbed hold of her arm, and she stopped walking.
‘What does that mean?’
She glanced down at his hand. ‘I helped him stay alive also.’ She had fought against the idea that, for a period, they had been allies of sorts. It was strange admitting it aloud.
Gallus nodded slowly and released her arm. ‘I see. Nerva is an honourable man, and if he feels indebted to you in any way, he will want to settle that debt.’
It was funny hearing Gallus praise Nerva. He seldom had anything positive to say about anyone. A warm feeling resembling pride bubbled inside her, as if his high opinion of Nerva reflected her own good judgement. ‘Are you going to accept his offer?’
They had stopped outside the weapons room.
‘I will suggest an obscene amount, one much higher than your worth, and go from there.’ He drummed his fingers on his side as he thought. ‘Say you did end up a freed woman. What would you do?’
Her plan had always been the same. The moment she was free, she would return to the highlands. ‘Go home.’
Gallus laughed, holding his belly. ‘Just like that, you would sail back to Caledonia?’
She scowled at him. ‘Is that really so obscene? That I would want to return to my family?’
‘Not that you would want to, but that you think you could just hop on a boat and stroll through a war zone.’ He took a moment to collect himself. ‘Even if you walked to the port, you would still need to secure passage on a ship. For that you would need coin.’
‘I can earn coin.’
‘And what sane man is going to let a Maeatae warrior board his ship at a time like this?’
Brei swallowed. ‘The war cannot last forever.’
‘No it cannot. But you will need to work in the meantime.’
So that was his angle. ‘I know that.’
‘Perhaps I could employ you.’
She watched him a moment. ‘Perhaps I’ll find employment elsewhere.’
Gallus laughed. ‘Let us not get ahead of ourselves. First we must see just how indebted Nerva Papias feels.’
Before Brei could respond, Otho ran past them.
‘Slow down,’ Gallus shouted after him. ‘You are going to knock someone down at that speed.’
Otho stopped and took a few breaths before speaking. ‘There are rumours.’
‘What rumours?’
‘They are saying Severus is dead.’
Gallus’s face fell. ‘Gods, let it be only rumours. It is unthinkable that he should die in that place.’
That place was Brei’s home.
Otho was backing away. ‘I am heading to the forum to see what I can find out.’
‘I’m coming with you,’ Brei said, taking off at a jog.
‘You have a fight tonight,’ Gallus called. ‘You need to rest.’
She turned and walked backwards a few paces. ‘Have I ever let you down?’
He waved her away. ‘Go, and report back what you learn.’
There was a crowd gathering when they arrived. Men, women, and children stood in chilly February temperatures, all waiting to hear if the rumours were true. It was the most people Brei had ever seen packed into the large space. She often went to the forum just to admire the monuments, occasionally wandering inside the temples to watch people pray. It was fascinating to her that they could enter looking completely calm, and then a few moments later be down on their knees weeping before various gods.
Sometimes she would follow behind families who knew something of Rome’s history, fathers who would stand before each monument and tell the story of how it came to be built and why it was of such importance. The stories sounded like legends, and she could not help but wonder which parts were true and which were carefully crafted lies designed to inspire young Romans to do things like travel to faraway lands—and massacre all the people.
‘Any announcements yet?’ Otho asked a woman clutching a palla to her chest. She shook her head. Turning to Brei, he said, ‘Wait here in case there’s an announcement. I’m going to check the notice board.’
Brei nodded. ‘All right.’
The woman next to them glanced disapprovingly at Brei. While her Latin was much-improved, her accent still managed to turn heads.
Brei watched a merchant push his cart through the crowd, the smell of his honeycomb mixing with the smell of possible rain. When she faced forwards again, she spotted Nerva standing just ten feet away with his back to her. He was with Marcus, the tribune who had spent the entire campaign following him around like a little pup. She looked around for Otho, but before she had a chance to flee, Nerva turned and looked straight at her. His gaze was so intense when it landed on her that Marcus spun around to see what had caught his attention. Unable to take both their gazes, she turned and fled in the other direction. Too bad people were packed in so tightly she could barely move.
‘Brei.’
She recognised his voice behind her. ‘Excuse me,’ she said, pushing between people, but everyone was moving towards the podium.
‘Brei.’
Nerva grabbed her arm, and she had no choice but to face him. She was still getting used to the sight of him out of uniform.
‘What are you doing here?’ he asked.
Again, she looked around for Otho and could not see him. ‘Waiting for the announcement, like everyone else.’
He did not look pleased. ‘Gallus just lets you wander around the city by yourself?’
She frowned. ‘I’m with Otho, my… trainer.’ Friend seemed a stretch, as all they did was beat and bait one another.
‘Well, where is he? It is not a safe time to be on your own.’
She pulled free of his grip and was about to make a snarky reply when someone stepped up onto the podium. He smoothed down his tunic and cleared his throat, staring down at the board in his hand. Nerva turned to listen.
Brei stepped closer to Nerva. ‘He makes it sound like he died in battle instead of tucked up in bed.’
Nerva brought a finger to his lips to silence her, and she looked around at the outpouring of grief. More people were arriving, no doubt wondering what had brought the city to its knees. Nerva looked pensive, while she felt only relief and hope that her people might finally get some reprieve from the fighting.
‘Killed,’ wailed a nearby woman. ‘At the hands of barbarians.’
Brei and Nerva looked at one another.
‘Let us get you out of here,’ Nerva said, ushering her in the other direction.
‘Why?’ Brei glanced over her shoulder at him, confused. She kept walking though.
Nerva signalled to Marcus over the tops of people’s heads that he was leaving with her. The tribune nodded, then turned back to listen. ‘Because grief makes people do strange things,’ he said, turning back to her. ‘Best not to speak. Your accent might be a trigger for some.’
She knew something of triggers. The death of her mother fuelled the violence inside her every day.
More people filled the forum, making it almost impossible to get out. Brei resisted the urge to elbow her way through the crowd as she was swept away by them.
Nerva reached back for her. ‘Take my hand.’
She took it and pulled herself behind him. He managed to clear a path, looking back every time her shoulder clipped against someone. When they were finally through the crowd, Nerva stopped and looked both ways down the street.
‘Where do you live? I will take you home.’
He still had hold of her hand, and she did not pull away. ‘Vicus Patricius.’
He looked at her with an expression she could not read. ‘Which end?’
‘Subura.’ She felt her cheeks heat as he continued to look at her. The region was well known for its prostitutes.
He stared at her for the longest time. ‘Let us go.’
‘You really don’t have to walk me.’ He let go of her hand, and it immediately turned cold.
‘No more talking. It is not safe.’
They walked in complete silence the rest of the way. There was too much going on around them to have a conversation. The mood of the city was eerie. News of Severus’s death had spread, and people stood in groups in the middle of the street, talking in hushed voices, crying, or consoling those in tears. Brei watched the road in front of her, walking a few paces behind Nerva, like any other slave.
When they arrived at the building, there was a woman standing outside Brei’s room wearing a red toga. She smiled at Nerva.
‘Hello, handsome. Fancy a drink to honour our emperor?’
Brei gave her a look that wiped the smile from her face and had her strolling away, hips swinging.
‘Friend of yours?’ Nerva asked as Brei twisted the door handle and bumped her shoulder against it. It groaned open.
‘Friend of yours, it seems.’ She turned to look at him. ‘Gallus told me of your generous offer. You should know he intends to bleed you dry.’
There was a hint of a smile on his face. ‘I have been dealing with men like Gallus my entire life. I would expect nothing less.’
She looked around. ‘You don't owe me anything, you know. Why not use the coin for another good deed? There seem to be a lot of hungry people in your city.’
He regarded her for a moment, not looking offended as she thought he might, but rather amused. ‘Why not just say thank you? It does not fix everything, but it does enable you to find employment of your choosing. Why risk your life for a greedy man like Gallus?’
His words seemed sincere. ‘What else do you think I’m going to do in a city like this? I’ll still be an unskilled foreigner. I can’t sew or weld, or cook the foods you eat. Even your bread is different to ours.’
‘I can find you employment if you need help—’
‘That’s what I’m trying to say. I don't want your help anymore. And I don’t need you to buy my freedom.’
He crossed his arms. ‘Do you have a better plan?’
‘Yes. I plan on earning it in just a few short years.’
‘Is that what Gallus told you?’
She felt her cheeks heat. She did not like to look the fool, especially in front of him. ‘That’s what we agreed.’
He exhaled. ‘Why wait?’
‘Because.’
‘Because why?’
‘Because I can’t repay you, and I don’t want to owe you.’
Nerva stared at her. ‘You will not owe me anything. Consider it a gift.’
She felt an odd sort of panic rise inside her. ‘You don’t have to keep saving me from these situations. It’s confusing.’
‘What are you talking about?’ He reached out and took hold of her arms. ‘What is confusing?’
She pulled free of his grip. ‘Every kind gesture, every gift, is another tie to you I have to sever. We are not friends.’
He swallowed and straightened. ‘I understand.’
She was surprised by his response, but of course he understood. At some point he must have felt that pull between them, the one that should never have been there to begin with.
‘Make sure you lie low for a little while,’ he said. ‘At least until things calm down.’
‘I have a fight tonight.’
His eyes returned to her. ‘Where?’
‘It’s a small arena you won’t have heard of.’
‘You should not be fighting in arenas. It is risky. Gallus knows that.’
‘No one cares about a few slaves fighting at an arena that size. Only fits a hundred men.’
‘Gallus tell you that also?’
Brei did not reply.
‘You should pull out,’ Nerva said. ‘Now is not the time to play barbarian.’
Brei took in his serious expression. ‘I appreciate your concern, but the decision is not mine.’
‘It would be if you accepted my offer.’
She sighed. ‘You needn’t worry. Gallus protects his assets.’
‘Gallus will always care more about money than people.’ He took another step back. ‘I understand why you do not want to accept my help, so I will leave you alone. But if you refuse help, then you are going to need to be smart, because right now you are underestimating the city you live in.’ He paused. ‘If you need me, for any reason at all, my house is located in region thirteen, halfway up the hill. You can ask anyone where the Papias domus is located. Everyone knows.’
She was torn between telling him to leave and asking him to stay. The conflict of emotions whenever he was around was exhausting. She had no reason to delay him any longer. ‘Thank you for walking me home.’
Nerva only nodded, then turned and headed back down the street.
Chapter 23
Brei remained in the doorway, watching Nerva until he was out of sight. A small part of her wanted to see if he would look back.
He did not.
The moment he was gone from sight, she felt a pang of something resembling loneliness. When she went inside, she found she could not sit still. After pacing the length of the small room for some time, she gave up on the idea of rest and went to find Gallus to tell him she would not be fighting. He was already at the arena, looking the happiest she had seen him in months. Apparently, he was not as affected by the death of the emperor as the rest of the city. She almost felt bad ruining his good mood, but Nerva was right, it was not the time to put on war paint and fight in front of a crowd.
‘You are early,’ he said, walking over to meet her.
‘And you’re happy.’ The sight of his beaming face was a little unnerving at a time when everyone else was grieving.
He rocked on his feet, the way he always did when he had good news. ‘Two hundred denarii is what I paid for you. Iunius wanted four hundred, but I pa
id two.’
Brei’s eyebrows pulled together. ‘Yes, I was there, remember?’
‘Nerva Papias, so adored by the people of Rome that I would not be surprised if he became emperor himself one day, just paid me six thousand denarii in exchange for your freedom.’
Brei blinked, staring at him in shock. But as the shock wore off, it was replaced with irritation. She had specifically told him not to go ahead, and he had looked her straight in the eye and told her he would back off. Then he had done it anyway.
‘Did you already accept the money?’
Gallus looked at her as if she were crazy. ‘Did I… six thousand was my starting point, and he agreed without even attempting to negotiate. Of course I accepted. What sane man would say no to that amount of money?’ He rocked on his feet again. ‘That sum is far more than I would have made from you in a few years, and I am no longer responsible for your upkeep.’
‘My upkeep?’
He waved a hand. ‘Your housing and such.’
Brei’s face hardened. ‘You mean the small room I share with two other women in the slums?’
‘Better than sleeping on the street. I must say, you are sounding rather ungrateful.’
‘I’m just pointing out that my living arrangements cannot be that expensive.’
‘Well, you are now free to leave if you find it so beneath you.’ He reached into a pocket and pulled out a coin pouch. ‘Here,’ he said, tossing it to her. ‘While I am in no way obligated to share any of my profits with you, take that as a gesture of my goodwill.’
She had been getting a lot of those lately. Brei stared at the pouch in her hand. ‘Coin?’
‘One hundred sestertii.’ He said it slowly, as though she would have trouble comprehending such an amount.
It was not a lot of money, but given she was starting her freedom from a base of zero, she accepted it. ‘Thank you.’
‘Oh,’ Gallus said, remembering something. ‘What is this I hear about you not fighting this evening? Nerva seems to be under the impression that you are withdrawing.’
She had never said no to a fight in her life, so she understood his confusion. The plan had been to withdraw, but now Nerva had once again taken it upon himself to make the decision for her. He had been the one who said that if she were free, she could make the decision for herself. ‘Of course I’ll fight. I have to pay my way somehow.’ She regarded him for a moment. ‘But first we need to agree on my cut of the profits moving forwards.’
