by Karen Klyne
“Fine.”
The subject was closed, and for a good few minutes neither of them said a word. Gemma didn’t say she’d missed her visit, and she didn’t ask where she’d been all week. She asked nothing about her or the children…so Reece offered the information. Gemma just sat, either picking at her nails or biting them. They looked a mess. “Why don’t you go and have a manicure? There’s someone who comes in most days, you know.”
Gemma looked up. “I might do that next week.”
“You could have your hair cut too. They have their own hairdresser.”
Gemma laughed. “I look that bad, do I?”
“No. I just thought it might cheer you up a bit.” Reece picked up the Kindle. “Been reading anything good?”
“I only found it today. I was turning my mattress, because it was a bit on the lumpy side, and there it was. I forgot I’d put it there for safe keeping.” Gemma bit her lip. “I’d like some different books. Would that be all right?”
Reece sat upright. It was the first time Gemma had asked for anything apart from fruit and veg. “Of course it’s all right. It should be charged up, and apparently, there’s Wi-Fi in the lounge.”
Gemma rubbed her neck. “I’ve never had a Kindle…or I’ve forgotten how to use it.”
Reece picked it up. “Shall we go do it now? I’ll show you how. It’s dead easy. Even I can use it, and I’m a dinosaur when it comes to tech stuff.”
Gemma jumped up. They sat in the corner of the lounge and Reece gave a step by step guide.
“How do I pay for it?”
“It’s linked to my account, so buy anything you want.”
Gemma nodded. “Thanks.” She smiled. “It’ll give me something to do.”
“Good.” Reece looked up and saw a few visitors pass by. “I guess I’d better get going.”
Gemma sprang off her seat. “Can you wait a minute? I have something in my room.”
“Sure.” Reece’s eyes lit up when she saw the folded paper in Gemma’s hand. Perhaps she’d written a note to Callum and Mattie? That would be wonderful.
She passed it over to Reece, and she put it in her pocket. She turned to go. Should she kiss her on the cheek or not? She risked it. “See you on Monday.”
Gemma gave a half smile, turned, and walked away.
She couldn’t wait to read the letter. She was tempted to open it in the car but decided to wait until she got home. Even then she had to wait, because her mum had cooked a meal. First, she went upstairs and tucked Mattie and Callum in and told them what a splendid weekend they were going to have, that they’d go down to the beach and collect shells and pebbles, and then they’d go amongst the rocks and see if they could find some little fish. They’d take a picnic and drive to the small cove with the caves. Maybe if there was time, they would go to the cinema too. They were so excited. Now she wished she’d saved it for the morning, as they would probably take ages to fall asleep.
When she got downstairs, the three of them sat down for dinner. Reece told them about the Kindle and how Gemma was going to download some books. Her mum and dad looked wary. “It’s a start, isn’t it? She’s beginning to take an interest in the outside world.”
Her dad scratched his jaw in between mouthfuls of food. “Yes. You’re right. It’s a start.”
He didn’t sound convinced, but then there was so much history to overcome. As far as Reece was concerned, Gemma was showing signs of improvement. No, it wasn’t going to heal their marriage, but perhaps it would move things on a stage further. Then they’d both know where they stood. It wasn’t an easy conversation, because she knew her mum and dad were trying to protect her. They’d done that all her life, and when the marriage turned sour, they were there again.
After dinner, she kissed them goodnight, and they left. For two days she’d have her children all to herself.
And now for the letter. She took it from her jacket, poured herself a glass of wine, and sat on the sofa. She took a sip and put the glass down on the coffee table before she unfolded the crumpled notepaper and smoothed it out.
Dear Reece,
I’m sorry to have caused you and your family so much grief. Believe me, I never meant to. I am suffering too.
I know this is hard to believe, but please give me one more chance to explain. You can burn this letter or file it away somewhere. But I can’t forget who I am.
My name is Alex Gambol. I live at 18 Seascape Crescent, Barlington, Essex. I am thirty-one years old, and I’m single. My mother, Helen, has multiple sclerosis. She came to live with me recently after having a fall. My father passed away eight years ago.
I’m a property investor. I buy, sell, and rent properties. I’m good with my hands.
I like pineapple and anything healthy. And I love my dog, Jasper.
I do not have a mother and father who live in Spain.
I do not have a wife and two children.
This is not a figment of my imagination. It’s the truth.
I understand that it’s difficult to take in, but I can only pray that one day you will believe me. I don’t know how to make you believe me, when I understand how unbelievable it sounds. But I swear to you, I’m not the woman you think I am, and I’m not crazy. But I hope you’ll keep coming around, because your visits are keeping me sane.
Sincerely,
Alex.
Reece put the letter down and took another drink. It was hard to digest. She’d been hoping it was a letter for Callum and Mattie, and instead she got this. She didn’t really understand what it was. Maybe if the roles were reversed, she’d be doing the same. However, there was a part of her, just a tiny part, that wanted to believe her. The handwriting certainly wasn’t Gemma’s. It was too neat and her words to the point. As far as she could recall, Gemma had never put pen to paper. Like everything else, it was a quandary.
Should she discuss it with Dr Bollard? She’d be interested in his interpretation. Yes, tomorrow she’d phone and make an appointment.
***
Reece spent the most wonderful weekend with her children. They’d done everything they’d planned and more. It refreshed her and made her feel good to be alive, and her children were carefree and happy, just the way they should be. She vowed she’d plan something every weekend in future. It was just what they all needed.
Later that evening, she lay in bed and checked her emails. One was an order confirmation of three books from Amazon. She opened it, wondering which books Gemma had chosen. She laughed when she saw the purchases. Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte, Eleanor Oliphant is Fine by Gail Honeyman, and Becoming by Michelle Obama. It was quite an eclectic mix and not Gemma’s usual picks. Obviously, her alter ego was choosing her reading material too. Reece hadn’t yet read Becoming. It was on her list for whenever she had time. At least she’d be able to share that one, perhaps even discuss it. It was a strange choice though. Gemma hated memoirs. She snuggled down and fell to sleep. Slippery dreams of Gemma begging to be understood, alternately crying and raging, kept her tossing and turning all night.
Monday arrived all too quickly. Now she had to face the letter again.
She finished her surgery early and went straight to the hospital. That way she’d have her discussion with the doctor and get a quick visit with Gemma. She wouldn’t have long, because her mum and dad were leaving early, though her visits didn’t seem to matter much to Gemma, except for keeping her “sane.”
She’d only met Dr Bollard once before and she thought he was a little smarmy. However, he welcomed her and shook her hand vigorously.
“How can I help you, Reece?”
She handed him the letter from Gemma. He slipped a pair of glasses on that perched halfway down his nose.
When he’d finished, he peered over the top. “So, what do you think?”
“Sometimes, I almost believe her. And she speaks and writes differently to the Gemma I knew.”
“You want to believe her. It’s natural.” He tapped the letter with his finger. �
��You see, this is all part of her problem…her illness.” He made a steeple of his fingers. “Somewhere, deep inside her brain, she’s invented this other life, along with a different voice. It’s her make-believe life. You see, it’s a form of escapism; an alter ego, an alternative self. It’s a part of her personality that is in marked contrast to her true original personality. It’s technically called psychosis or a psychotic break.”
“You mean like Jekyll and Hyde without the evil?”
He gave a condescending smile. “You see, Reece, it’s not uncommon. I’ve seen it many times. Of course, it manifests itself in different ways.”
She wished he’d stop saying, “you see.” If she saw, she wouldn’t be asking. God, the man was so up his own arse. “Will she recover?”
“Some do, and some don’t. It’s a question of time. In my opinion, she’s beginning to show signs of improvement.” He tapped the letter again. “You see, she’s already showing signs of self-doubt. I can read between the lines.”
“Really?” Somehow, Reece highly doubted that.
He nodded enthusiastically. “Absolutely.”
“So, where do we go from here?”
“Perhaps a day out.”
Reece grimaced. “At home?”
“Not necessarily. A drive out somewhere…maybe a spot of lunch. Show her that reality is nothing to run away from.”
“Yes, that sounds good. I’ll give that one some thought.”
Dr Bollard rose from his chair. “Excellent.”
It was apparent that the meeting was over. Reece got up and he showed her to the door.
“Come and see me any time.”
Once was enough. They shook hands, and she left his office. Now she wished she’d never shown him the letter. What a prick. He was bound to confront Gemma with it. All these weeks of trying to gain her trust, and now she’d blown it.
Chapter Nine
They say that time flies when you’re having fun. Gemma was having fun, doing all the things she loved, like spending. The contents of her wardrobe had to go. She hated dresses and fancy coats. Give her jeans and trackies any day. As for the shoes, she could hardly walk in them. Now she could go and buy anything she liked, and it was all her money. Well, it was now.
She didn’t change the old Audi car. It was perfect for shopping, but mostly she took taxis. She’d also got into a regular habit of meeting Laurel. Sometimes it was just for coffee and other times it was at the wine bar. That was the only time she really drank. She liked Laurel. It was like she’d known her forever, which Alex had. She’d also got into cooking. She’d studied the recipes and come up with some damned good meals. Her mum liked them, and they got on like a house on fire. Who would have thought?
She’d also plucked up the courage to meet her work force; Dez, Pete, and Al. They were a rum bunch and obviously hardworking. They’d completed the loft conversion in the new house, and she’d instructed them to install new kitchen units and do everything necessary for either rental or reselling. They seemed to be ecstatic when she told them she wouldn’t be mucking in, that she trusted them to use what she’d taught them. She said she was slowing down and that the accident had made her rethink her future role. She said she’d discuss that with them another time when the house had been completed. By her calculations, it looked like there was plenty of money in the pot. Maybe she’d continue buying houses and let the lads do them up. Alex had made plenty of notes, and there were lots of books around that she began to study.
By the end of the week, she was shattered. She’d been in her office all day. There was still so much to go through and so much to learn. She’d got out of the habit of absorbing information. In her old life she had everything off to a fine art. It didn’t take much brainpower, just half a dozen pair of hands. She’d get up, get the kids sorted, feed them, and take them to school. Tidy up, do the washing and ironing, make the beds or change the beds. When she finished, all she’d wanted to do was fall onto a bed. Then it was shopping, pick up the kids, feed them, and prepare dinner. Of course, when Reece came home, she’d do her bit. She was often knackered too. Later, they’d eat and maybe watch a bit of TV when they were alone. But that’s what it felt like even with Reece beside her on the sofa. Alone.
Reece had told her to get a cleaner and someone to do the laundry, but what would she do then? Hairdressers, beautician? Anyway, those days had been washed away, along with the laundry. Thank God. She was enjoying this new challenge and for the first time in her life, she really thought she could accomplish something. Yeah, it was off the back of something the other woman had built, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t keep it going.
She heard her mum coming down on the stairlift, and then she appeared through the kitchen door in her wheelchair. Gemma had just poured herself a mug of coffee. She held the coffee pot up. “Do you want one, Mum?”
“Oh, yes, please.” She joined Gemma at the table.
She took a drink and put her mug down on the table. “I haven’t prepared anything for tonight. Do you fancy a takeaway?”
“Do you know what I’d really like? Fish and chips.”
Gemma’s eyes lit up. “With mushy peas?”
“Absolutely.”
“Who does the best?”
“Parkers on the Main Street, opposite the library.”
“Great.” Gemma picked her coat up from the chair. “Back soon.”
When she got back, her mum had laid the table, so she unwrapped the paper and put a fish on each plate followed by the chips and peas. The aroma almost made her drool. “They put salt, pepper, and vinegar on. They said that’s how you like it.”
Her mum rubbed her hands together, and they both tucked in. When they’d finished, her mum reached over and squeezed Gemma’s hand.
Gemma laughed. “What?”
“You’ve changed so much.”
That’s because I’m an imposter. Gemma tilted her head. “In what way?”
“You’re...you’re more like a daughter. The daughter I never had.”
Gemma grimaced. “Was I that bad?”
“You were distant with me. You were Dad’s girl. He worshipped the ground you walked on and vice versa. I always felt left out, and we never really had anything in common anyway.”
Gemma squeezed her hand. “Shall we put that in the past and start again?”
Her mum grinned. “I’d like that.”
That was that then. A new beginning. It would be nice to think Alex might be experiencing a happy new beginning in Gemma’s old life, but it was doubtful. Whereas she’d chosen to leave her life, the other woman hadn’t. It had been forced upon her. She felt a momentary pang of guilt. That didn’t seem totally fair, but the witch had said she’d slip into that life without so much as a blink, so at least she wouldn’t know what she’d lost.
That was it and here she was. So far, no regrets. Her life was good.
Chapter Ten
Alex rubbed her hand over the back of her neck and looked at the double doors. She could have sworn she’d just seen Reece, and yet it was only six o’clock. If she was visiting her it wouldn’t be until seven. Unless…
Dumb ass. Reece was probably on her way to see Dr Bollocks. He certainly talked a load of it. Odds were, Reece had shown him the letter. Realistically, she hadn’t expected her to believe her story, but she thought she might give her the benefit of the doubt after the time they’d spent together. Looking on the bright side, perhaps she did have doubts. That’s why she was going to show it to Bollard. What an asshole he was. He’d say she was delusional, or that it was her alter ego. Did it really matter? She was doomed either way.
She continued reading her Kindle. She’d begun all three of her new books. Right now, she was reading Eleanor Oliphant. It was turning into a feelgood book, and that’s what she needed. She checked the clock again. Six-forty. She’d better hightail it back to her room before Reece saw her there. She didn’t want Reece feeling guilty about her need to talk to the doctor. She was doing a
ll she could and didn’t deserve to feel bad about it.
She clutched her Kindle tightly. It had become her valued possession, and she had few of those now. When she got back to her room, she picked up her two pillows, and put them upright. It had taken her weeks, but at last she had two pillows. She’d like to lock them up along with her Kindle. It wasn’t that the place was full of thieving buggers, it was just that some patients got confused and came into her room. They’d pick anything up. It was just par for the course.
At six fifty-five, there was a knock on her door.
“Hi, Gemma. It’s only me.”
Alex looked up and smiled at Reece. “Hi.” She picked her Kindle up. “Do you want to go grab a coffee or something?”
Reece winced. “I’m sorry, I haven’t got long. Mum and Dad have to leave early tonight.”
Alex shrugged, trying not to show her disappointment. “No worries. You shouldn’t have come. It seems crazy to dash here from the other side of town.”
Reece’s face turned red, and she scratched her nose. “It’s okay, I had an appointment this side of town, so I thought I’d pop in.”
Alex was right. Guilt was clear in Reece’s pretty eyes. She shouldn’t have felt that way. She was sure she’d have done the same if it were her.
Reece managed to fill in the twenty minutes by telling her about her weekend with Callum and Mattie, and how they’d sat by the rock pools for hours watching the fish and sea urchins. Alex tried to smile in the right places and take an interest. It wasn’t easy, but it did sound quite idyllic. She didn’t know Reece’s children, but it was the least she could do when Reece was trying so hard with her. Eventually, Alex looked at her watch. “You’d better get going. I’ll walk as far as the lounge with you. I might sit and watch a bit of TV or read.”
She followed Reece out, walked as far as the lounge, and waved her off as she left toward the exit.
Reece turned around. “See you tomorrow,” she shouted.
