He didn’t want to be a pawn. He didn’t want to be the official face of the Forest. He wanted nothing to do with that.
For the briefest of moments, a thought occurred to him: I don’t have to play ball. I can quit. Just walk out. There’s no rule that says I have to stay here.
Can I give this up? Everything I’ve worked my entire life for?
He knew the answer to that. He couldn’t. He hadn’t given up everything in his life just to walk away now.
Instead of going back to meet with Sergeant McCready – and title or not, he was the Sergeant of the Forest – and the others, he went out to the bay. The two fire engines sat there silent.
This could all go away.
“They’re going to use you, Carver,” a voice said from behind him. Sam’s thoughts had been flying through his head and he hadn’t heard the man approaching from behind him. Sam quickly turned to find McCready standing there, looking grim. “I’ve seen it happen before. Not personally. But it’s happened before.”
“It has?” Sam asked. The question sounded so stupid to his ears but it was too late to take it back.
“You ever heard of the Pack?” McCready asked. Sam nodded. The Pack was another Shifter-only fire department, based out of Los Angeles. They’d never been as big or popular as the Forest. He’d heard jokes growing up that the rejects from the Forest made up the Pack. “Used to be like us. We were all formed at the same time, you know. Heard of the Claw?” Sam shook his head here. He had never heard of the Claw. “I’m not surprised. There was the Forest, the Pack, the Claw, the Fang, the Bear, a few other smaller fire departments. All created at the same time and based around the country. The Pack in LA. The Forest in New York. Claw, Houston. Fang was in… I think Kansas City. They’re long gone.
“The idea was that there was a network of loosely connected fire departments across the country. We supported each other. All independent, of course – but we helped each other. It didn’t last long. The country is changing, Carver, and with it, so too are we. The Fang, the Bear, the other smaller ones have all been assimilated into regular fire departments.
“Don’t get me wrong, here, Carver. I have nothing against humans. Some of my best friends are humans. But you see that we’re losing our identity? The reason that the Forest is so highly regarded is that we’ve resisted commercialization, we’ve rejected ideas that would harm the department. For as long as we could, and now that’s all changing. You know the feeling of getting into something at the end of it? When the glory days are long past?”
“I think I do all too well.”
“They’ll try to use you, Carver. The bosses, the guys up top, way up to, the men with the money – they have ideas. And they’re not in line with what’s good for the Forest. For us. Just keep your head on straight.”
With that, McCready left, leaving Sam standing there and wondering what was happening and how he’d got so caught up in it.
He’d joined the Forest to make a difference – and he’d ended up as nothing but a pawn.
At that moment, the front door opened and Brooke walked in, carrying what looked like a very heavy bag, probably loaded down with papers, tests, and textbooks.
“Need a hand?” Sam asked, instantly trying to forget everything that had happened to him in the past half hour.
“I’d love one,” she said, smiling. Her face was red from the cold. She was absolutely breathtaking. Sam grabbed her bag and winced for a moment under its weight. She laughed lightly and led the way towards the spare room that doubled as their classroom.
She’s the one good thing that’s come from the suits meddling with the Forest.
And without thinking, he found himself saying, “There’s a dinner coming up at the Chief’s house this Friday.”
“I’ve heard,” she said, nodding.
“And I was wondering if you would go with me,” he said before he was able to stop himself, and then he realized just what he’d done – and he felt as if his whole world had come crashing down around him.
Brooke took a deep breath and blew it out. It did nothing to relieve the fluttering in her stomach, or the feeling that she was going to throw up. She held up one hand and found it was shaking.
What has gotten into me? Why am I acting like this? Like a little child?
She looked at herself in the mirror and tried to clear her head. Her mother had already been up to her room twice before, knocking and telling her it was time for her to come down.
Tonight was the night – and Brooke was feeling a mix of emotions she didn’t think was even remotely possible. Of course, she was nervous, though not for her father’s fancy dinner with all of the higher ups. She’d been to many of these before, though truth be told, now that she was teaching these men, she might find herself in the crosshairs.
She blanched at this thought, though it was still nothing compared to the other emotions roiling through her.
He’ll be here.
Simultaneously excited and feeling sick with herself, Brooke knew that Sam would be here, in her parent’s house. He probably was already downstairs, shaking hands and being toted around like the poster child they were attempting to push him as.
Brooke desperately wanted to see him and talk to him – and yet, she wanted to avoid him altogether. The past few days in class after he’d asked her to the dinner and she’d turned him down had been awkward, to say the least. Where there had been something before – some little hint of attraction, some twinkle in their eyes when they looked at each other, now was just embarrassment and awkwardness.
She had wanted to say yes, of course. Brooke had wanted to tell Sam that she would love to go to dinner with him.
But it hadn’t been possible. She knew that, and she desperately hoped that he knew that, as well. There was no possible way that she could have agreed to go to this dinner with him.
And why not? There aren’t any rules that say you can’t…
She reminded herself that first off, he was her student, and whether or not there were rules that forbid it, it wasn’t right. Though that look her gave her in class… it made her want to break all of her rules.
And second, he had to focus on his schooling. He had to succeed. His future was riding on it, as were the hopes and dreams of her father. He’d been reminding Brooke just how much they wanted Sam to succeed – and she kept reminding him that it wasn’t up to her, though her father didn’t seem to be listening very well.
But she knew that second point was moot. She did want him to succeed – but she wanted more time with him, too.
There was another knock at her door and she heard her mother say, “Honey? The guests are mostly here. There are a few of your father’s friends asking about you… I think you should come down now.”
“I’ll be right there,” she called back, still looking at herself in the mirror. She took a few more deep breaths.
“That’s what you said five minutes ago,” her mother said.
“I’m coming,” Brooke said. She took one final deep breath, steeled herself, and turned from the mirror, crossing her room on her heels that she tried to her best to look like she wore often. Her dress was dark red and tight, which made it harder to walk than normal.
“Why didn’t you want to come out, honey? You look wonderful,” her mother said as she opened the door.
“It’s not that, Mom,” Brooke said, and together they made their way down the hallway and then to the staircase. She could already hear the murmur of conversation making its way through their house. She considered just turning around and heading back to her room but she knew her mother would never let her.
Luckily, her mother decided not to press her any, so they walked down the staircase in silence. From there, they turned and entered the massive reception hall located on the side of the house. It had always struck Brooke as absolutely unnecessary. It reminded her of an old book where old, stuffy people courted one another in highly synchronized dances. The walls were lined with chairs and the
far side had a couple of cover tables with punch bowls on it.
People were everywhere, talking, chatting, standing and looking at the expensive artwork on the walls. Brooke caught sign of her father, who had his arm wrapped tightly around another man, leading him towards a group of important looking Shifters in expensive suits.
She felt her heart leap in her chest as she saw who the man being maneuvered around the room was.
Sam.
She must have gasped, or blushed, or given some kind of indication, because next to her, her mother said, “Hmmm,” and nudged Brooke.
“What?” Brooke murmured, making her way to the drink table to ignore her mother’s question. But she followed her to the drink table where she served herself a little bit of punch and turned down the offer for some liquor by the bartender.
“Who is that man with your father?” her mother asked. Brooke shrugged. “Is he one of the firefighters in your class?” Brooke ignored this question. “He’s cute.”
Brooke felt herself blushing and turned away, pretending to feign interest in a painting on the wall she’d seen a hundred times before.
“Is he the one your father’s been talking about?”
“I guess,” Brooke said, finally unable to ignore her for no longer.
“You guess? What’s he like in class?”
“He’s smart.”
“Your father said he’s been having some trouble…”
At that moment, her father turned Sam away from a group of men and his eyes saw his wife and daughter and lit up. He whispered something to Sam and they both laughed. Then Sam’s eyes came up and met hers and there was a moment; a moment of awkwardness, of longing, of desire, of something that was more than just a look. Her mother must have seen how he was looking at her because she nudged Brooke as the two men approached.
“Sam, I know you know Brooke – but I’d like to introduce you to my beautiful wife, Donna.”
“How do you do, Mrs. Sharp?” he asked, extending a hand that her mother shook with a blush.
“Fine, thank you. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sam. I’ve heard you’ve been working really hard not just in your class, but in your entire training.”
“I sure hope so,” Sam said with a smile. “You know Brooke?”
“Yes, actually,” her mother began, and then Brooke grabbed Sam’s hand and pulled him away from them.
“Excuse us,” Brooke said, giving her parents her best smile. None of the men knew that she was the Chief’s daughter and the longer they had no idea, the better it would be. And she especially didn’t want Sam know. What would he think, knowing that a man that was trying to sway him one way in the Forest was none other than her father?
“What was that about?” Sam asked when they were sufficiently away from them. “The Chief…”
“The Chief and his wife don’t need us standing around and bothering them,” Brooke said. It was a flimsy excuse and Sam looked at her with narrowed eyes. He wasn’t stupid – he knew something was up, but he didn’t question it further.
After a few moments of standing in silence, Brooke turned back to the refreshment table to find that her parents had gone, probably to go mingle with more of the guests. She recognized some of the members of the Forest – namely McCready and Norris. They were standing around a man in a chair – no, that wasn’t right.
There was a huge man sitting in a wheelchair, most of his hair burnt off and covered in painful looking burns.
“Is that Chief Rawls?” she asked. Even as she did so, however, she knew just how stupid of a question it was. Before Sam could answer, she saw that McCready was waving Sam over. He looked hesitant for a moment. “Go ahead.”
He nodded without saying a word and she watched him go. He looked a little bit disappointed to be leaving her company, and she felt the exact same. But when he reached the group of men, Sam turned back and waved her over. She pointed out herself, mouthing Me?
He nodded again and she made her way through the crowd of men and women conversing. She didn’t know who even a quarter of these people were, or honestly, even how many of them there were. Her father seemed to know everyone, and everyone seemed to know him in some way, shape, or form.
“So you’re the one teaching our new recruits,” Rawls said as she walked up. He smiled warmly and extended a hand, which she took. He had a surprisingly strong grip. “McCready says you’re a breath of fresh air for the Forest.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” she said with a smile.
“I hear things have been changing since I’ve been injured,” he said, looking slightly morose. “Sharp’s a good man. He’s not the problem – he’s just as caught up in all of this as you all are. But remember that the Forest has been around for a long time, and it’ll be around for a long time even after we’re gone.”
Brooke listened with genuine interest. She had expected the man to be solemn, down on his luck about his injury – after all, he couldn’t work any longer – but that didn’t seem to be the case. Or, if it was, he was extremely good at hiding it. He asked the men questions about the training, taking special interest in Sam. He was becoming a sort of celebrity for both sides of the argument, she realized. She listened carefully, picking up enough innuendo and veiled remarks to know that the men of the Forest, with the exception of a few of the more radical members, thought that this batch of new recruits – Sam chief among them – would be another breath of fresh air, a surge of new blood. It was also confirmed that the men knew just how important Sam was to the suits, the higher ups, the men who ran the show – whatever it was they wanted to call them – and that they wanted to prematurely pull him from active duty after his graduation to promote him.
She could tell that Sam was uncomfortable with this idea. He kept fidgeting and looking around the room nervously whenever these men were mentioned, like they were about to swoop in and pull him away to discuss their plans with him.
Looking around the room, she saw that her idea wasn’t that far from the truth. A couple of the important looking men she’d seen earlier were pointing at the group. She knew they weren’t interested in the old Chief, or McCready, who had been demoted, or even her, the teacher that was guiding them through their learning. They were after Sam.
She nudged him and nodded ever so slightly. He looked over and saw them approaching.
“Dance with me,” she whispered, taking his hand and setting her cup on an unoccupied table.
“What?” he asked. But she was already grabbing his hand, pulling him.
“Excuse us,” Brooke said, nodding as O’Brien – who had also been injured when the Chief had been injured, walked up to a happy greeting by Rawls. The rest of the men hardly noticed that they disappeared into the middle of the ballroom.
A slow song was play over the speakers around the room and Brooke grabbed Sam’s hands – feeling them, really feeling them for the first time – and then they were on her, one on her hip, the other with his fingers intertwined in her own. Out of the corner of her eye, the men had saw that he was preoccupied and sat back on the edge of the dance floor, watching. She whispered, “They’ve stopped. But they’re still watching you with great interest.”
“Sharp said they would be really interested in talking to me later,” Sam said. “I guess now is later. Thanks for the save.”
“Anytime,” Brooke answered, leaning close to him and moving in big, large circles with the rest of the dancers. It was nice – but Brooke could tell there was something unsaid between them.
“Sam, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t,” he told her, pulling back ever so slightly so they could look at each other. “I know why you couldn’t say yes. It doesn’t make it any easier.”
“Why did you ask me, Sam?” she said. “I’m your teacher. You’re my student. I’m not supposed to let you get distracted.”
“I like you, Brooke.”
“You don’t even know me. You only know me as your teacher. It’s my job to be nice. It’s my job to s
upport you. It’s my job to help you and help you learn. You think you like me, Sam, but you don’t. Not really,” she said. The words – they just came spilling out. They hurt her to say – and obviously, they hurt Sam, as well.
“That’s not true,” he said, but he looked hurt when he said it. They danced in silence for a few moments, each not saying anything and just moving to the music. “You’re saying that you don’t feel anything at all?”
In answer, she said, “Follow my lead.” Following her cues, they moved towards the far side of the room, as far away from the men who wanted to talk to Sam as possible. She also did it as a way to ignore Sam’s question.
What can I say? That yes, I think there might be something there? That I’ve never met another man who makes me feel the way he does? That somehow, someway, I know that there is something there?
“What do you want me to say, Sam?” she asked. She could still feel his hand on her own. It was warm and felt absolutely wonderful. She wanted to pull him close and kiss him – though she knew she couldn’t. “That you’re right? That maybe there is something there?”
“Is there?”
“What good would it do? Why do that to ourselves? Even if there was, there can’t be anything between us. You have the Forest. I have my job. Neither one of us should risk our futures because we think we feel something! It’s ridiculous!”
At that moment, the music began to die down, and she heard her mother announce that in a few short minutes, they would be moving the tables into the room to serve dinner. Couples began to move off the dance floor, most moving in the direction of the men watching Sam.
Brooke felt her fingers slide out from Sam’s, feeling more disappointed than she would like to admit that she hadn’t wanted them to part. But his hand came up and slid across her cheek, holding her head up as she looked deep into his bright, golden eyes. A finger trailed ever so softly along her chin.
“I won’t kiss you,” Brooke said. “And even if I did, it wouldn’t prove anything.”
But she pressed her lips to his and kissed him just the same.
Bear Heat: BBW Fireman Bear Shifter Romance (Firefighter Bears Book 1) Page 10
