I remember him telling me that he wanted me the first minute he saw me, and my cheeks get hot. Was I just a choice of convenience? Did he make a snap decision to have me the minute he met me because he liked the way I looked? Or maybe the power he claims I have bottled up inside me drew him to me.
“You’re awfully quiet over there,” Lexy says. “Whatcha thinking of? Whips and chains?”
“No.” I look down at my champagne glass, feeling suddenly sober. “I was just wondering why Aiden chose me.”
“Because you’re a sexy goddess. And don’t give me that look.” Lexy reaches around the table to give me a one-armed hug. “You’re gorgeous, Emma. You just don’t give yourself any credit. Did it ever occur to you that he might really have the hots for you? There is such a thing as love at first sight, you know.”
“Not with vampires,” I say. “They’re so cold and standoffish.” Although that description doesn’t match Aiden at all. Well, unless he’s angry or disappointed with me as he is now.
“He’s probably just cold because he needs to learn how to love again.” Lexy gets a dreamy look in her eyes. “He lost the only woman he ever cared about when Katherine died and now you’ve reawakened feelings in him he thought had died with her.”
“Will you please try to sound less like a trashy romance novel?” I ask in exasperation. “Katherine—was that the name of the witch he loved? And possibly—”
“Killed. Yup.” Lexy nods, her red hair bouncing. “I couldn’t get her last name out of anyone—lost in the mists of time I suppose.”
“I wonder if she’s the one that copy of Farrow’s belonged to,” I mutter to myself.
“What?” Lexy asks. “Why would you have a copy of a beginner spell book here?”
I tell her all about the mysterious book, the tingling in my fingertips when I touched it, as well as the way I actually lit two candles by magic. Although I’m not sure how I did it or if I can ever do it again.
When I’m finished, Lexy looks at me with wide eyes. “Emma, that’s wonderful.Amazing!”she exlaims. “You finally did magic!” She leans over to give me a tight, ecstatic hug and then frowns. “Why in the Goddess’ name didn’t you tell me before?”
“I felt weird discussing it over Aiden’s private phone line,” I confess, pulling away. “And besides, I kept hoping I’d be able to do it again so I could report that I’m finally not a dud anymore. But I’ve tried and tried and so far…” I shrug. “Nothing.”
“If you did it once, you can do it again,” Lexy says with utter certainty. “What exactly were you doing differently when you managed the first time?”
“Uh, well…” I’ve already told her so much, I guess it can’t hurt to tell a little more. “Aiden was touching me. Actually, we were touching each other. And, well…” I can feel my cheeks getting hot. “When we were finished, the candles were lit.”
“Sex Magic,” Lexy breathes. “That’s amazing, Emma. Who knew a vampire would be the one to finally break down the barriers and let your magic out?”
I frown because her words are similar to what Aiden said. “What makes you think I have barriers holding it back? With most duds, they just have no magic at all.”
Lexy shakes her head. “But you’re not a dud—this proves it. Besides, when we were kids, I remember hearing your mom talking to my mom one night. Your mom said you were going to be the most powerful witch of your generation—she said she was already seeing signs of your power leaking out around the edges.”
“But that’s impossible,” I say blankly. “My mother died when I was only eight—way before I hit puberty. And I don’t remember ever having any powers back then. I couldn’t have.”
“I dunno.” Lexy shrugs. “I’m just telling you what I heard. I never said anything about it before because, well, I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”
“Thanks,” I say dryly but I know she means well. And truthfully, knowing I was a massive disappointment to my mother’s expectations would have been pretty hard to bear growing up.
“You’re welcome.” She gives me a smile. “And just wait and see, you’re going to have magic yet. All you need to do is practice while you and Aiden are getting your kink on.”
“Right,” I murmur. “It should be totally possible to concentrate on working a complicated spell while I’m tied down, being sexually tortured.”
This, of course, brings on a whole new barrage of questions that I would rather not answer since the champagne seems to have worn off. But Lexy—being Lexy—is like a bloodhound on the scent. She won’t give up until she gets every last kinky detail. We spend the rest of her visit talking about the ins and outs of being a vampire’s submissive sex slave and the time just flies.
The next time I glance up at the clock, it’s almost four forty-five. “Oh my Goddess.” I scramble out of my chair. “You have to leave. Aiden is going to be here in fifteen minutes.”
Lexy pouts. “I thought you said it was okay with him for me to come by? Why can’t I stay and meet him?”
“He said it was okay as long as I kept on the harness,” I say. I’m already on my feet and tugging at her arm, trying to get her up and out of the house. “But I took it off. He’s already pissed at me for disobeying him last night. I don’t need him to be even angrier.”
Lexy frowns and crosses her arms. “And what happens when he gets mad? Does he beat you? Because there are limits, Emma, even for the Sacrifice Laws.”
“No, it’s that he doesn’tbeat me,” I say, thinking of last night. “He doesn’t whip me or kiss me or tuck me in or anything. He just gets all cold and withdrawn.” Just thinking of the look on Aiden’s face last night makes my chest tight. I really, really don’t want to go through that again.
Lexy looks thoughtful. “Hmm. An emotionally withholding vampire. Now what you have to do is—”
“What I have to do get you out of here so I can put that stupid harness back on before he gets home. Which is going to be in…” I glance at the clock. “Ten minutes. Hurry up, Lexy, move your ass!”
“Well you don’t have to be rude about it,” she huffs but at least she’s moving now. I shoo her out of the house with multiple promises of more get-togethers and lunches by the pool. But despite my attempt to hurry, I still only have five minutes to get back into the harness and try to look normal by the time she finally drives off.
Feeling like Cinderella at five ’til midnight, I rush for the bedroom, stripping off my clothes as I go. Why do I keep doing this to myself? Next time Lexy comes over I’ll set the alarm on my phone and get rid of her a whole hour before Aiden gets home. That is, if there is a next time. If he catches me without the harness on and I let on that I took it off because I didn’t want to wear it in front of my cousin, he might ban her from the house.
My thoughts are chaotic and my hands are trembling as I finally manage to get free of my clothing and start strapping the harness back on. The loop around my right thigh goes surprisingly well, the thin leather strap folding into place around my flesh as though it was made for me. I insert the vibrator—making sure it’s all the way off first—and then go to work on the second strap.
And this is where I run into trouble. The strap is stiff and it doesn’t want to fasten. I push and wiggle, trying to get it threaded through the tiny silver buckle but it won’t budge. A quick glance at the grandfather clock says it’s one minute until five. I still haven’t heard the crunch of tires on the shell driveway but Aiden could be here at any minute.
In desperation, I return my attention to the stubborn strap. I have managed to feed the thin leather through the silver buckle but now it won’t come out the other side. Cursing under my breath, I give a mighty yank…and hear a sharp pop.With dread I open my hand to see that one entire side of the strap has torn off and is lying like a dead snake in my palm.
I stand there for a minute, just looking at it. Oh my Goddess, what have I done? What have I done? Panic rises in my throat but I push it back down. Grimly, I examine the
damage. Maybe I can tie the leather straps back together and then—
“Don’t bother. It’s broken.”
Chapter Seventeen
The deep, familiar voice from behind me makes my heart sink. I turn slowly to see Aiden standing there, wearing a disapproving look on his face.
“Master,” I begin. “I can explain—”
“No explanation is needed,” he says crisply. “I can see well enough that you’ve disobeyed me.”
Feeling backed into a corner, I try a counterattack. “How did you even get here? I never heard your car driving in.”
“I saw your cousin driving away as I was coming up the drive. I stopped the car and walked the last bit of the way.”
“In order to sneak up on me!” I say accusingly. “You were hoping to catch me doing something wrong.”
“No, I was hoping not to.” He frowns. “I was afraid you’d disobey orders and remove the harness if you had your cousin over.”
“Why shouldn’t I?” I demand. “It’s one thing to wear it around you but it’s just plain weird to have it on around family.”
“It was my order that you wear it without fail all day, every day,” Aiden says quietly. “You agreed to that, Emma.” He takes a step toward me, looming over me, looking every inch the intimidating vampire Master that he is. “I also gave orders that you not touch yourself.”
I feel my cheeks getting hot. “What-what are you talking about?”
Aiden looks at me angrily. “Don’t lie to me, Emma. I can stand anything but that. I can tell you’ve allowed yourself a sexual release.”
Now I’m blushing all over. “How can you possibly know that?”
He lifts his nose and inhales deeply as though testing the air. “I can smell it,” he says, his voice dropping to a menacing purr. “Your pent-up desire, your desperate release. You deliberately disobeyed my orders and made yourself come.”
I open my mouth to deny it…then remember my crazy multiple-orgasm fest when I was trying to get the damn harness off. “Okay,” I say at last. “I did but it wasn’tdeliberate. It was an accident.”
He raises one very skeptical eyebrow at me. “You had an orgasm by accident? Emma, do you think I’m stupid?”
“No, of course not! But if you’d just let me explain—”
“Let me explain something to you.”He grips my chin firmly with his long, cool fingers and holds my eyes with his own, speaking with a quiet intensity that shuts me up. “I need your sexual tension just as I need your complete submission. Not just for me—there are other forces at work, other things at stake than just the two of us and this petty little game we’re playing.”
“What other things?” I demand. “Why don’t you just tell me instead of hinting around all the time? I’m the one who’s expected to submit. I’m the one who has to wear harnesses and straps and let you fuck me naked in public. Did it ever occur to you that if there’s a bigger reason for all this, maybe I’d like to be in on the secret too?”
His face is closed and he drops his hand, releasing my chin from his punishing grip. “You’ll know everything in the fullness of time. But not now—not yet.”
“When?”I explode, so full of frustration I can’t hold back anymore. “When are you going to tell me? Or are you just going to keep me in the dark as long as it suits you? Is that how you treated Katherine?”
His gray eyes flash silver and I know at once I’ve gone too far. I shrink back away from him but he never lifts a hand to me. He just stands there looking at me. “Where did you hear that name?” His voice is cold and quiet but his eyes are terrible to look at.
“It doesn’t matter where I heard it,” I say but the courage has leaked out of me at the sight of those eyes. It’s not just anger I see in their silvery depths but pain—somehow I have wounded him. And though I’m hurt and upset and completely pissed-off, I never wanted that. Never wanted to hurt him. “You loved her, didn’t you?” I say softly. “Would you have kept her in the dark if there was something important going on?”
“No.” His voice is bitter and he finally looks away. “It was she who kept me in the dark. And then her secrets killed her.”
“Aiden—” I start to say but he shakes his head.
“No more. I cannot speak of this.” He turns to go, his broad shoulders tense under his expensive gray suit jacket.
“Wait!” I exclaim. “What about dinner? And…everything else?” I’m trying to ask him if we’ll ever get back to our regular routine. It seemed bizarre to me at first but now it’s the norm and well, I missit. I miss Aiden. His hands on me, his lips and mouth exploring my body, the soft, caressing way he calls me darling. But now, even though he’s standing in the same room with me, he seems remote—unreachable. It’s as though he is standing on a distant mountaintop I can’t climb.
“Aiden,” I whisper. “Master, please…”
“I’ll have Barnes bring a tray to your room,” he says, not turning around. “Your education is suspended for now. Do as you please.” Then he stalks out of the room. I hear his footsteps and then the heavy sound of the front door closing.
And I know he is gone.
I mope around the room the rest of the evening and finally go to bed early after barely picking at the tray Barnes brought me. I’m so miserable I can hardly see straight, which is stupid, right? Anyone would think I had fallen in love with Aiden James and was depressed because he didn’t love me back. Which is stupid—too stupid for words.
But not too stupid for tears. When I finally turn out the lights and slide beneath the sheets, I feel them hot and salty on my cheeks. Angrily, I swipe them away. What’s wrong with me? Why do I care so much if he’s unhappy with me? If I hurt his feelings? He hurt mine too, damn it! And he’s clearly keeping secrets—not telling me things I need to know. There’s a mystery here somewhere and Aiden is trying his damnedest to keep me from solving it.
I tell myself these things and try to work up a good fit of righteous indignation but all I can manage is a horrible headache right behind my eyes. Goddess, there’s no use denying it—I have feelings for that damn vampire. And it makes me miserable to be fighting with him.
You more than have feelings—you love him, whispers a little voice in my head but I push it away. I can’t be in love with my vampire Master. After all, our arrangement may feel like an eternity sometimes but it’s strictly temporary. The Laws of the Sacrifice state that once a year is up, I’ll be set free. Then Aiden will choose someone else—another Sacrifice at next year’s Sacrifice Ceremony. And he’ll probably find one who’s a lot more compliant and eager to be mastered than I. Someone who’s prettier and slimmer and not a dud and… Goddess, I hate her already and I don’t even know who she is! But just the idea of anyone else with Aiden makes me feel crazy.
I don’t know how long I lie awake in the darkness, tossing and turning, my brain churning in endless circles. Because Aiden has told me to do as I like, I put on a silky white nightgown I found in the back of the wardrobe out of spite. I’m not sleeping naked if I don’t have to! I tell myself defiantly.
But the nightgown keeps getting twisted around my hips and bunching up underneath me. It’s irritating in the extreme and weeks of sleeping nude, it feels too hot and confining. Finally I pull it off and drop it over the side of the bed. Then and only then, when I feel the cool whisper of the sheets against my naked body, do I finally drop off to sleep.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
An uneasy dream twists my thoughts. Someone is hurting someone I love. Someone who takes care of me, who I need to take care of in turn. They are coming for her but I won’t let them hurt her! I’ll fight. I’ll show them what I can do, that I’m not too little or too young to control the power. I’ll show them…
Bright orange shadows dance against my closed eyelids, driving the uneasy dream away. Somehow I know that something is wrong. I open my eyes to see flames flickering around the curtains of one of my windows. The smell of smoke assaults my nose. Panic leaps inside me like a
living thing—fire! My room’s on fire!
I jump out of bed and run for the door but the metal knob burns my hand. I jump back with a cry. Black smoke is seeping under the door and the flaming curtains have fallen onto the bed where I was lying just a minute ago.
I go to the other window, the one not yet on fire, but I’m small, my arms are those of a child. There’s no way I can lift the heavy glass and wood. I push against it anyway, trying with all my might, not wanting to die in the hell my room has become.
Outside the glass I see a face. A leering, laughing, swarthy face with short stubby horns on its forehead. He is mouthing something to me but I can’t hear his words. I know one thing though—if I go out, I’ll be in as much danger there as I am here in the burning house.
With a little moan, I back away from the window. I find a dark corner and curl into a ball, my arms wrapped around my knees. I don’t know what else to do.
“Emma? Emma!” A familiar voice screams my name. The door burst open and I see my mother standing there. She is coughing and choking, the smoke filling her lungs but still her first thought is of me. Seeing me in the corner, she runs to pull me into her arms. “Oh sweetheart!”
“Mamma?” I’m crying now, my hot face pressed to her neck. “I’m scared.”
“Don’t be,” she tells me. “We’ll get out of this but you have to be very, very brave. Now tuck your head in like this…”She tucks my exposed head and hands into my long nightgown and holds me close to her body like a precious bundle. “I’m going to run through the house, Emma. It’s on fire but I’m going to use magic to keep us safe—to keep you safe. Do you understand?”
From within the protective covering of my nightgown, I murmur a muffled, “Yes Mamma.” But I’m not sure how she’s going to do it. Even as a young witch who hasn’t yet come into her powers, I know that fire is the easiest element to call…and the most difficult and dangerous to control. Not only that, it’s drawn to witches—it hungers for us. That’s why our kind was burned at the stake in the old days—once the flames tasted them, there wasn’t enough magic in the world to keep from being burned alive. But the sound of my mother’s voice says she’s going to try.
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