Ben nodded. ‘I understand that. Are there any other concerns that we can help you with?’
‘Nah, I suppose we’re good.’ Jem stood up, making for the French windows that led out onto the patio. ‘I need a bit of fresh air. But I’ll be expecting you to come back and see how my Eloise is doing.’
‘Dr Petrakis will be coming to see your daughter again tomorrow. You have her number so you can call if you’re worried about anything.’
Jem didn’t answer, wrenching open the doors and walking outside.
‘Yes. We have your number. Thanks.’ Kriss grimaced apologetically. ‘He’s very stressed...’
‘It’s okay. I’ll see you tomorrow. You take care, eh? And call me if you need me.’ Arianna rose, giving Kriss a smile. The manager made for the door with as much speed as he could without breaking into a run, and ushered them out.
* * *
The manager wrung Ben warmly by the hand, before giving the room numbers for her other two patients to Arianna and hurrying away. Ben watched his receding figure, as he walked around the swimming pool and back into the hotel.
‘Nice guy. Was he like that yesterday?’ Ben stopped in the shade of one of the trees, looking out to sea.
‘Worse.’ Arianna shook her head. ‘There’s something about him, though. As if all the shouting is really a scream of pain.’
‘I just wish that he hadn’t felt the need to attack you. That really wasn’t fair.’
‘He’s afraid. He wants to protect his wife and daughter, and he’s just lashing out at anyone and anything.’
Arianna was right. She’d borne the brunt of the insults and her ability to look past that and try to help the family was commendable. ‘I know. I felt a lot like that when Emma died.’
Arianna leaned towards him. ‘I’ll bet you didn’t go as far as interfering with Jonas’s medical treatment, though. Or making the people around you walk on eggshells.’
Ben shook his head. ‘No. No, I didn’t do that. Jem really needs some help, for his own sake and his family’s.’
‘Yes, he does. I’ll do whatever I can, and maybe Kriss will help him to make the right decision and come and see you, when you get back to England. It was really good of you to offer that.’
Ben smiled down at her. Being treated with such contempt can’t have been easy for her, but it was just like Arianna to push her own feelings to one side and concentrate on what other people needed. She did it a little too much for her own good sometimes; he felt sure that ignoring her own feelings was the root cause of the nightmares that plagued her.
‘I’ll come back tomorrow, when you go to see Eloise.’
She raised an eyebrow. Maybe that had sounded far too protective, but Ben didn’t actually care. He did feel protective about Arianna, and it was the first time in years that he’d begun to believe he could make a difference.
‘You’re on holiday, remember.’
‘Yeah. Just taking a little holiday from my holiday. A beautiful island bathed in sunshine can begin to grate a little after a while.’
‘I wouldn’t know. This beautiful island is where I work, so I suppose I have the best of both worlds. And I wouldn’t have missed your spectacular self-control for the world.’
Ben grimaced. ‘It wasn’t that obvious, was it?’
‘No, it wasn’t obvious at all. You were firm with him, but you were really kind as well.’
An idea occurred to Ben. ‘Tell you what. Lizzie’s taken a liking to one of the cocktails they do here. It doesn’t contain any alcohol, so you can drink as many as you like and still drive, but it has umbrellas and cherries...’
‘Umbrellas and cherries. Sounds good to me.’ Arianna grinned.
‘What do you say we go to see how the other two kids are doing, and then go upstairs to my room and order room service. We’ll drink the cocktails and you can tell me exactly how annoying this afternoon’s been. As loudly as you like.’
She was thinking about it. It was nice to see Arianna acknowledging her frustration instead of bottling it all up.
Suddenly she smiled, reaching up to caress his cheek, and Ben felt a tingle of excitement radiate from her touch. ‘Letting off steam over cocktails. You know my guilty pleasures, don’t you?’
He could think of a more delicious way of letting off steam. And as to guilty pleasures...
Cocktails were going to have to do.
* * *
Arianna had diagnosed one of the other children with measles, and Ben had concurred. The second had a runny nose but none of the other symptoms, and since he’d been vaccinated they’d agreed that it was unlikely he would have been infected. She’d already checked her records, to make sure that all of the children on the island had been inoculated, and it seemed that the outbreak was under control.
They ate at the hotel that evening, with Lizzie and James. Arianna had started to worry what Lizzie might be thinking of her, but her fears were groundless. Lizzie had the same laid-back sense of humour as her brother, and they were laughing together before very long.
Ben walked her out to her car. Arianna had already decided what she wanted to say to him, but he spoke first.
‘You’re going home alone, aren’t you?’
‘Yes. I... It’s not that I don’t want you there tonight, but I have the foundations to move forward now.’
‘And that’s something you have to do by yourself.’ A flash of regret showed in his eyes.
‘Maybe not entirely but... I don’t want to define our relationship any more, Ben. You were there for me when I needed you, and I’m really grateful for that. But...’ She shrugged, not entirely sure how to explain this to him.
‘I get it. We both made very firm limits for ourselves, and I couldn’t have stayed with you all night without them. But they feel like restrictions on our friendship now.’
That was exactly how Arianna felt. Being able to hold him at night, but not able to do so for anything other than comfort. Being able to touch him, but not in the way that she wanted. The glimmer in his eyes now was telling her that it wasn’t in the way he wanted either.
‘Let’s start again, Ben. I’d rather go back to the beginning and have a friendship with you that can just go wherever it goes. One where we don’t feel we’re rescuing each other from anything.’
He chuckled. ‘Anything apart from each other, you mean.’
They were still there. Her doubts and his, about whether they’d ever be able to be more than just friends. Neither of them were ready for that yet, but at least it was something that was possible now.
Arianna turned to get into her car but he stopped her, laying his fingers gently on her arm.
‘Would it be too soon...?’
‘No. It wouldn’t.’ Not a moment too soon. Arianna stood on her toes, planting a kiss on his lips and then drawing back again.
Just a few seconds. That somehow made it even more intense. When he brushed a kiss against her cheek it felt as if the world was slowly exploding, shockwaves almost bringing her to her knees. There was something to be said for restraint, even if it was hard.
‘Goodnight. Sleep well.’ His eyes were luminous in the half light.
‘You too, Ben. Shall I call you when I get home?’
‘Yeah, I’d like that. Just to let me know that you’re okay. And if you need me...’
‘I know. You’re only a call away.’ She wasn’t going to need him tonight. Because need precluded this delicious wanting, and that was more important to her than anything.
‘Quick. Go.’ He smiled down at her. ‘Before I decide that I’m not done rushing things.’
She got into her car, reversing out of the parking space. Trying to watch Ben and drive at the same time wasn’t going to work, and so she dragged her gaze back onto the road in front of her. But when she glanced in her rear-view mirror he was still standi
ng there, watching her go.
* * *
They’d talked on the phone for an hour before Arianna had gone to sleep. Ben had been there for her when she’d needed him, and now missing him at night had become a matter of quite a different kind of longing. Arianna was determined that if he did end up in her bed again, it wouldn’t be out of pity or concern.
‘What do you reckon?’ She was walking through the reception area of the hotel with Ben, after they’d visited Eloise for the second time together.
‘She’s not well, but there’s nothing to worry about. She should be ready to travel in a little over a week, and Jem and Kriss can take her home.’
‘Yes. I think so too.’ Arianna looked up at Ben. ‘Why are we not happy about that?’
‘Because Eloise isn’t the one who needs real help.’
‘Yes. I don’t see what more we can do for Jem, though.’ He had seemed calmer and quieter today, and had been positively friendly towards Arianna. But she still had the feeling that nothing had changed with him, and he might explode into another show of anger if he felt his wife and daughter were threatened again.
‘Neither do I. Kriss has given me her mobile number and I’ll give her a call when I get back to London and see how they’re doing.’
‘That’s nice of you. At least I don’t feel as if I’m sending them off into a void.’ She sighed. Eloise was very well cared for and there really was nothing more that they could do. ‘So what are you up to now?’
‘Jonas has discovered the ball pit in the hotel basement. He’s completely lost interest in fishing now, and he wants me to build him one when we get home. I’m going to see if I can wrangle him out of there to have some lunch. You?’
‘I’m going for a bite to eat, and then picking up some trees. We’re going to plant them in the courtyard at the front of the health centre, and the land at the back as well. I’ve raised the money for it all, and people from the village are coming to help.’
Ben gave her a quizzical look. ‘Let me get this right. Your father built and equipped one of the best health centres I’ve seen anywhere, and you’re spending time raising money for a few trees?’
‘It does look like a bit of an oversight, doesn’t it? But you raise the money, and then go and plant the tree yourself, and it gives you ownership of a place.’
‘Ah, yes, that works. I’d suggest it at our next practice meeting if we had any room for trees. Would you like a hand?’
She was hoping he might say that. ‘Everyone’s welcome. You have to dig if you want lemonade.’
‘No problem there; I can dig. I don’t suppose you need any more trees, do you?’
Arianna had intended to buy some of the trees herself; it had taken a while to raise the money she had. ‘I think we could do with a few extra. Why, would you like to donate one?’
‘I think I’d like that very much. I’d better get two, though, because Jonas will want his own. As long as no one minds—this is a project for the village.’
‘No one minds.’ And Arianna really liked the idea that Ben would be leaving a tree behind, at the health centre. She could tend it and watch it grow, and maybe one day he’d be back, to see it blossom and bear fruit.
‘That’s great, thanks. Shall we go and have something to eat, then we can leave Jonas here while we pick up the trees and pop back to fetch him?’
She liked the way that planning anything with Ben was so effortless. It was as if she was a part of their small family, and she’d never been a part of a family that had so much fun together.
‘Yes, let’s do that. Then you can come and decide which square foot of Ilaria you’d like to make your own.’
CHAPTER TEN
ARIANNA HAD TOLD Ben that she hadn’t had a nightmare in a week. She didn’t jump at the sound of the ferry’s horn, and she was happy to spend time on the water. She seemed rested and relaxed, and for now the memories of the day on the ferry had loosened their grip on her. It might not last, but it was progress. She knew there was a way out now and however many setbacks she encountered, she could work her way back again from them.
That brought a whole new set of challenges.
The one where they’d taken Jonas swimming in the hotel’s swimming pool and he’d felt the subtle brush of her limbs against his. The one where he’d watched her on the boat, the sea breeze caressing her body. He’d never actually reckoned that a breeze was something to be jealous of before. Oh, and whenever she turned her dark eyes on him and smiled. That was when his whole world tipped into a maelstrom of forbidden possibilities.
He missed their nights together, though. Waking early to find her sleeping beside him had touched Ben deeply. But it had just been a way of being close to her, and yet still keeping himself safe from the conflicting realities of a relationship. Now that their relationship had changed, he hadn’t dared go any further than a brief kiss goodnight, and long phone calls before they went to sleep.
Arianna had cooked for Lizzie and James tonight. It had been a good evening, Arianna and Lizzie were becoming great friends and they’d been talking together in the kitchen for a long while, leaving him and James to drink their coffee on the veranda, and keep an eye on the children.
Lizzie had begun to yawn, and declared her interest in an early night. James had called the hotel’s taxi service and they’d taken the children with them, telling Ben and Arianna that they didn’t want to put an end to the evening for them. Arianna’s smile had made it impossible for Ben to leave.
They sat in silence on the veranda, watching the sun go down. ‘I’m just wondering if I could ever tire of this. Do you?’ Ben asked.
‘No, not really. A nice sunset always does it for me. When I was in London and I took the bus to work, I used to always look up from my book when we were crossing London Bridge. The view was always the same, and always different.’
Ben nodded in agreement. ‘I always get that feeling when I’m walking past St Paul’s. Different skies on different days, but it’s always the same.’
‘But you only have another week here. You should catch every sunset.’
Every smile and every word that Arianna said too. Each time she surprised him, and whenever he knew what she was about to say or do.
‘What do you say...we make the most of the week we have left?’ She turned towards him suddenly. This time, Ben knew exactly what she meant.
‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Arianna.’ The sudden stiffness in his tone sounded like a rejection, when really all he wanted to do was to gather her up in his arms and make sweet love to her. ‘I care too much about you, and...’
‘And what?’
‘We’ve only known each other for two weeks.’
Arianna shot him a reproving glance. ‘We’ve known each other for most of our lives, Ben.’
It felt like that to him as well. ‘I’m going back home in a week.’
‘That’s okay. Your place is in London and mine’s here. We both respect that.’
Ben was beginning to lose all respect for it. Wondering if he might not fall on his knees and promise to move here, lock, stock and barrel, just to be with Arianna. But that was impossible. He wanted to make promises to Arianna, could even imagine himself doing so, but he still couldn’t be sure that he could keep them.
‘You know I care about you, Arianna. But—’
‘I know. You don’t want to hurt me.’ She shook her head, smiling. ‘Haven’t you been listening at all? If you want to protect me, then you should make a start by respecting my decisions.’
She was right, of course. They’d already taken the step of wanting to find out where their friendship would lead, and they’d both known in their hearts that it would be here. He was fresh out of excuses, and he couldn’t pretend to himself or Arianna that he didn’t want her.
Her bag was hanging over the back of her seat, where she’d l
eft it after rummaging through it to find something for Lizzie. She reached into it, taking something out and concealing it in her hand.
‘This isn’t a warm night, or a sunset, or a glass of wine with dinner talking, Ben. I’ve thought about this and it’s what I want. I think it’s what you want too, but you won’t allow yourself to because you are going home in a week, and you’re too much of a gentleman.’ She held up a condom.
He was not thinking anything remotely gentlemanly at the moment. ‘Have you got just one of those?’
‘What do you think? I’m a doctor, and this is a very large bag. I should probably warn you that I’m fully prepared to take advantage of you.’
‘Come here...’ His head was swimming, with a desire so strong that it almost frightened him.
She got to her feet and walked over to him. Her gaze never leaving his face, she slowly sat down on his knee. Ben reached for her, pulling her close, and kissed her. Hard and strong, feeling her respond hungrily.
‘That’s what I really like about you, Ben. Underneath, you’re not a gentleman at all...’
* * *
This was so much better than she’d thought it could be, which sent the feeling firmly into the realms of the unknown. Her whole body was alight with desire and when she pressed the condom into his hand, and he took it, a bright feeling that they could do anything they wanted together consumed her.
‘Shall I make the bed up here?’ She wanted to make love with him in the cool evening breeze.
‘I don’t think I can let you go for that long...’ His lips curled wickedly. She felt his fingers skimming the fabric of her dress and then his hand on her breast. He kissed her and the effort it took not to scream out loud seemed to concentrate her hunger for him.
‘Good thought. My bedroom, then...’ Her fingers found the button at the waistband of his trousers, and she heard the soft swish of the zip. A strangled groan escaped his lips.
He threaded his fingers through her hair, letting her just enjoy his kisses, and the feeling that he was all hers and that she could do whatever she wanted with him. He responded to her every touch, his body hard and his mouth possessive. It almost broke her, right there and then.
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