My dad hadn’t been murdered, though. I couldn’t imagine what that must’ve been like. A small flame rose in my chest and I started to feel my anger rising. Fuck the Cabal and its games. Uriah’s heart was torn between his need for revenge and his dedication to his faith. My heart needn’t be so pure.
“You know what?” I said.
“What?” he asked, looking up to meet my gaze.
“I may not be the wisest wizard, nor the greatest warrior, nor the best sleuth in the business, but I can promise you this... I’m going to do everything in my power to find the person who murdered your father and I’m going to repay them in kind.”
“Thank you,” Uriah said, nodding. “It goes against my faith to seek revenge, yet, I can’t seem to help wanting to put an end to the bastard that did this.”
“I think God will forgive you this once,” I said, shrugging. “You’re still human, after all.”
“Fuck yeah,” he said, smiling.
“That’s some strong language for a holy man.”
“Yeah, some of the Knights are against the use of foul language. Especially the Chaplain Brothers.” He shrugged. “But we’re bikers. What do they expect?”
“You know,” I said, nodding at him. “I think you and are I gonna get along just fine.”
Chapter 6
With a belly full of barbecue, I stumbled toward the door behind Uriah and Hamish.
As soon as Uriah opened the back door, my sword pulsed a tremor down my spine. I’d learned to trust that strange sensation. I moved on instinct, reacting before my brain had time to process what was happening.
I slammed into to Hamish’s side, tackling both him and Uriah to the ground as a twisting spiral of purple and black tendrils sailed past my head. I glanced back on the way down, watching the unfamiliar spell as it slammed against the open door. It sizzled and hissed, then the metal frame turned to jelly and oozed away from the wall.
From the bottom of the pile, Uriah yelled, “What the hell?”
Clearly, he didn’t know why I’d tackled him, but I wasn’t really worried about that at the moment. I was more concerned about the robed figure standing just ahead of us.
“Hey, Uriah,” I said as I stood up. “I think I might’ve just found the prick who killer your father. That was easy enough.”
Uriah and Hamish both stood up as well. All eyes were on the newcomer.
Gray robes covered his figure and a long cowl completely hid his face in shadow. Even his hands were gloved, so I couldn’t even determine the color of his skin. In one of them, he held a long staff of twisting black vine. The only thing I could tell from his wardrobe was that he wasn’t into earth tones.
I also knew that he was a powerful mage. I wasn’t sure exactly how I knew this. Maybe he was displaying his own magical aura for me to sense, or maybe I was getting better at reading them, or maybe it was the fact my sword was vibrating like a jackhammer.
When he spoke, his voice sounded hollow and mechanical. It was kind of like Bane from the Batman movies, but not quite as cool. A little more nasally with a hint of whiny.
“Hello, Uriah,” he said. “My master sends his regards.”
I noticed my new friend was tense, not that I could blame him, but I was more worried about him going off the handle and doing something stupid to get us all killed. His hand was inching toward the giant sword on his back. I would have to step in and do something, but I just wasn’t sure what.
“Who are you?” Uriah asked.
“What should it matter to a dead man?” the stranger asked. “I see you have the satyr with you, and who is this? A new prospect perhaps?”
“You don’t recognize him?” Uriah asked, flicking a glance in my direction. “But you seem to know a lot about us. Interesting.”
The dark wizard paused for a moment, perhaps assessing whether he should know who I was.
“Not a prospect then?” He asked. “Who are you?”
I dropped the veil on Drynwyn and my staff as I drew them both from my back. It appeared as a broadsword, not much different than the one Uriah had his fist curled around. I didn’t let the blade flare to life, though. I wasn’t ready for our foe to know exactly who I was. That could still come in handy.”
“If you don’t know who I am,” I said, taking a step closer to put myself between my allies and our foe. “Then you haven’t been doing your homework.”
“Such a brave soul,” he said, then raised his staff into the air. I felt the magical energy stirring around him. It wasn’t quite right, though. Like the energy was crying out at the unnatural atrocity he was performing. A moment later, I understood why.
Two oozing black shapes took form on either side of him, rising to human height. As the fluid solidified, a human-like torso appeared from the oily substance. Then a head. The flesh of the creatures was pale white, with thick black veins protruding from underneath their translucent skin. A face began to form, almost human, but with long black tendrils that looked like tribal tattoos across their faces. They grew two muscular human arms as well with razor point finger nails. From behind their backs grew six long, spindly, spider like legs that wrapped around to the front of their bodies. From the waist down they looked like a centipede, their lower half covered in exoskeleton with hundreds of little feet.
“What in the fuck?” Uriah asked, glancing at me.
“What in all the fucks?” Hamish added.
Well, at least I wasn’t the only one who didn’t know what the hell was going on.
“Demons?” I offered. “Of some... Variety?”
The Dark wizard laughed. “Time to die, little bike rider.”
“Oh, me first!” I said. “I want to die first!”
The two beings beside the mage hissed at me through split lips. Their teeth were long, crooked, and sharp.
“Whew,” I said, summoning some more courage. “You really should get your minions a dental plan. That’s nasty.”
“Out of the way, peasant,” the mage said, then pointed his staff at me.
His intention was to swat me aside with a simple force spell. Arrogant prick. If he’d come at me with a real magical attack, he might’ve crushed me like a bug. Instead, his attack hit my shield and only shuddered the air around me harmlessly.
“A proper mage,” he said with a hint of surprise.
“No, asshole,” I said, and summoned Drynwyn’s white flames. “Blade Mage.”
The demons screeched in fear and took a shuddering step back from me, covering their faces from the light of my sword.
The dark wizard looked around at his minions and then back to me. Only, it was too late then, and I was on him. I swung Drynwyn straight for center mass, intending to carve him from shoulder to hip. Only when my blade struck his robe, the bastard pulled an Obi Wan Kenobi style disappearing act. His robe crumbled to the ground at my feet.
“Son of a—”
Then I fell as one of the demons leg swept me with its massive centipede bottom. I hit the concrete hard, lucky not have cracked my skull. Before I could react, spider arms lashed out and penned both my hands and my shoulders to the ground. With the creature’s weight over top of me I couldn’t use my sword or staff.
It pushed its nasty face closer to mine and peeled its lips back so I could see deep into its disgusting mouth. Unlike a human, it had three rows of teeth on the top and bottom. Every goddamned one of them had a cavities. Which I could see as it moved its mouth closer and closer to my face. It made a squishy noise with its lips, opening and closing them as its mouth drew nearer. It’s long spindly tongue and cut gums moved like it was performing some kind of erotic mouth breathing exercise. And its breath smelled like the devil’s asshole. I didn’t know if planned to bite my face off or lick me to death. I wasn’t thrilled about either option.
There was a loud crack of gunfire, and a black hole appeared in the demon’s head. Black oil seeped from the wound, running down past its nose and to its lips, where the nasty fucker licked its own oily b
lood back into its mouth.
There were three more subsequent pops and three more holes appeared in the creature’s head. It still didn’t seem particularly hurt, but it was definitely annoyed.
Then a broadsword flashed right across the top of my nose and cut two of the spider arms in half.
The other demon hit Uriah from the side and knocked him down, pinning him like the first one had me. These fuckers were quick.
From my peripherals, I could vaguely see Hamish running back and forth while he shouted, “Oh, shit! Oh, shit! What I do? Oh, shit!”
“Keep shooting!” I yelled while struggling to get my arm free.
Uriah had almost managed to free my sword arm before getting taken down himself. Only one spider arm still held it down. If I could just get it free...
Then he used one of his human arms, which I’d almost forgotten about, to pen my hand back to the ground and I was helpless once more as he started making mouth squishes at me again.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me!” I screamed. I summoned the only spell I had at my disposal. I’m not proud, but I spit right in the thing’s mouth, hoping maybe I could gross it out. I should have known better. It licked my spittle right off its own lips and swallowed it like a big gulp of cold beer on a hot day.
“That’s just...” I didn’t even have the words. “Hamish! Come shoot this thing in the mouth!”
Hamish was there in a second, ramming the barrel of his gun down the creature’s throat. He fired once then twice. The demon’s eyes went wide for a second, then went back to the same orgasmic look as before, and it sucked Hamish’s Glock right down its throat in a single swallow.
“Oh, God,” Hamish said, glancing down at me. “Now what do I do?”
“Punch the fucker!” I cried. “Just not in the mouth unless you want to fist its stomach!”
“I’ve got a better idea!” Hamish turned and dropped to the ground, as though he were about to do push-ups beside me while I was getting face licked. I’m sure there’s a fetish video like this out there somewhere. Instead of doing push-ups, however, Hamish kicked out with his goat legs and popped the demon in the side of the jaw.
The demon’s head snapped back with a crack and Hamish kicked him again. It used both of its human arms and two more of its spider arms to catch hold of Hamish’s foot. The Satyr squealed as the demon tossed him into a nearby trash pile.
Its focus still on Hamish, the demon let go of me and scuttled toward the goat man.
I rolled back to my feet and went after it, pausing only for a moment to repay the favor Uriah had tried for me. I cut through three of the demon’s spider arms, freeing Uriah’s sword arm. His sword was too big to swing in that range but when I saw him jam the cross-guard in the demon’s eye, I knew he had the situation under control.
Hamish screamed as the demon raised up over top of him and prepared to make love to his face. It never got the chance. I swung my blade right through its torso, severing it in half.
The creature screamed briefly then its whole body melted into a black pile of goo.
Uriah was on his feet now as well. He backed toward me, his sword in one hand and a silver-plated 1911 in the other. He shot the demon a few times as he eased away from it.
I was surprised the gunshots hadn’t brought any spectators out, but maybe folks in Memphis have the good sense to tuck in cover when they hear gunshots.
The demon made a series of guttural noises at us that I assumed were meant to be words.
“Yeah, you’re real tough, mouth sucker,” I said, then started toward it.
“Wait,” Uriah said, moving past me. “I want this one.”
“Fair enough,” I replied. “But I wouldn’t bother with your gun. Just cut the stupid thing up. If it doesn’t turn to goo like the other, then we’ll load the pieces in Hamish’s Jeep and dump them into the them into the Mississippi.”
“Sounds good to me,” Uriah said.
He holstered his gun and took his sword in a two-handed grip. Yelling a battle cry, he charged the demon hacking and slashing. His blade didn’t glow like mine did, but the way it burned through the monster’s chest, it was clearly enchanted.
Uriah was impressive. The creature tried to jab and strike, but he evaded each attack, then swung his sword again. Where my style was more about reckless abandon and figuring it out as I went, he was patient and waited for his openings.
He got a quick strike in that severed one of the monster’s arms. Then he avoided a strike, chopped off two more of its arms, spun, and lobbed off its head. A moment later it was a pile of goo as well.
I helped Hamish up and walked over to where the dark wizard’s robe had fallen. It was gone. I cursed and joined the other two.
“So,” I said as I approached. “That was... Something.”
“Yeah,” Uriah replied. “I guess I was right about them still being after us.”
“No idea who that might’ve been?”
Uriah shook his head.
“Great,” I said.
“What now?” he asked.
I shrugged.
“We could take him to the scene,” Hamish offered quietly.
Uriah thought about it and nodded.
Great. Now a murder scene. So glad I had a full belly.
Chapter 7
Uriah led the way on his bike. Hamish and I followed in the Jeep. After the fight with the skank demons I could’ve gone for a shower and nap, but instead we were going to where a man had been recently tortured and murdered. Wasn’t being the Blade Mage just swell?
After a nice driving tour of the city, we entered a neighborhood with a lot of old houses. Uriah pulled over in front of one and got off his bike. We parked just behind him. There were two more bikes and a car parked in the driveway.
Two old homeless men sat on the sidewalk, with their backs against the old picket fence on the edge of the yard. Otherwise, it seemed like a fairly quiet and safe neighborhood.
“This is the house I grew up in,” Uriah explained as we approached. He stared at it for a few moments, a mix of anger and pain on his features. “This is where they killed him.”
“We don’t have to do this right now,” I offered.
Uriah shook his head. “Nah, I want you to see. Like you said, maybe you’ll pick up on something.”
As we started toward the house, I heard the approaching roar of a motorcycle engine and turned to see three more coming down the street.
Uriah paused and watched them approach.
“Friends?” I asked, hoping not to jump into another fight immediately. I wasn’t sure whether the Knights had rival motorcycle gangs, but it seemed like it could be a thing.
“Knights,” Uriah assured me, then he cast a glare at Hamish.
The goat man took a nervous step back and put his hands up defensively. “Just looking out for you, boss.”
“I know,” he said. “And if you hadn’t brought the Blade Mage when you did, I’d probably be dead. It’s all good.”
The three riders parked behind the Jeep and strolled toward us. They didn’t look happy.
I could see their patches then. The skull with the red Templar cross on its forehead.
The man in the front had a dark complexion and a long black beard. More importantly, he had to be close to seven feet tall and was as wide as a Smart Car. Behind him, the other two guys weren’t exactly little either.
As the big man approached, I realized he was crying. I blinked, just to be sure. Yup, his eyes were red-rimmed and his cheeks were moist. He’d either been crying or his chubby cheeks had sprung a leak.
He walked straight up to Uriah, squeezed him into a hug and lifted him off the ground, much like Barrett had done to me.
“You, asshole,” the big man said, still squeezing Uriah like a teddy bear. “What the hell were you thinking?”
“Put me down, Tooter,” Uriah said.
The big man complied and turned to me. “You must be the Blade Mage.”
“I
am,” I replied, sticking out my hand. He swatted it away and before I knew it, Tooter was hugging me as well.
“Tooter, would you stop?” Uriah said, shaking his head. “You haven’t even been properly introduced, you dolt.”
“Sorry,” Tooter said sheepishly as he set me back on the ground. Looking down at me he continued, “You saved my best friend’s life. I owe you.”
“It was no problem,” I replied, then thinking about it, added, “Well, actually it was pretty fucking terrifying. But we’re all alive and in good shape. Plus, I got a killer breakfast.”
Tooter turned back to Uriah. “I still can’t believe you went off alone like that.”
“Oh, drop it already,” Uriah said, crossing his arms. “You’re not my damned mother.”
“No, but I am your Tail Gunner,” Tooter replied, crossing his own arms. “I’m the one who’s supposed to have your back.”
“I know,” Uriah said. “It was a stupid mistake. It won’t happen again. Especially now that we know they’re still out to kill us. Or me, at least.”
“Damn straight,” the big man said. “Should we have Victor cancel the wake party?”
Uriah scowled. “As much as I’d like to, Victor is right about letting the rich tits have their event. We can’t risk losing our contributors.”
I had no idea what they were talking about, but I figured someone would loop me in at some point.
“Why are you here?” Tooter asked, changing the subject. “You don’t need to see it again, brother.”
“I want the Blade Mage to see it,” Uriah said, then pointed at the two bikes and the car parked in the driveway. “I recognize the bikes but who else is here.”
“One of the witches,” Tooter said. “The younger one. She said you wanted her to see it.”
“Good,” Uriah said, then started for the house.
“Uh, witch?” I asked.
“Oh, right,” Uriah said, halting in his tracks. He turned back toward me. “The Colonial Coven sent down an entourage of witches to help with the investigation. That’s not a problem, is it?”
The Memphis Knights Page 5
