by Olivia Myers
Amber scooped the food onto the plates and then took them over to the small kitchen island with stools and set them down. She grabbed some forks and salt and pepper and set them on the table, too.
“Drink of choice?” Amber asked as she grabbed some glasses. “I have milk, whiskey, vodka, water or juice.”
“Hmmm, can I have some vodka and milk?” Kalinda asked as she jumped onto a bar stool and sat down in front of a plate.
“Sure,” Amber said, chuckling. She got out a small shot glass and her bottle of vodka and set it in front of Amber, and then some milk from a glass container and poured a cup for Kalinda.
“I’m more of a whiskey girl myself,” Amber said as she grabbed her whiskey and set it on the island in front of herself. “It’s a nice night cap.”
“Do you find school stressful, or do you enjoy it most of the time?” Kalinda asked as she started eating her food.
“I enjoy it most of the time, I like learning new things.” Amber poured herself two fingers of whiskey. She sipped it throughout dinner, and Kalinda took a shot of vodka after her meal and finishing her milk. She set the dirty dishes in the sink and turned on the water to wash them.
“We need to talk, Amber,” Kalinda told her as she rinsed the plates off.
Amber came up behind her and pulled her hands out of the sink. She led Kalinda away from the counters. “We can talk after, but right now I need you, Kali. Please?”
Kalinda looked at her and nodded right before Amber kissed her, pressing her lips over hers. Amber hadn’t been very aggressive last time, but this time she was. She pinned Kalinda against the wall, and grabbed Kalinda’s wrists. She pulled them over her head and held Kalinda there. Kalinda knew she could break free if she wanted to, but she found Amber’s little game exciting. Kissing her back, Kalinda opened her mouth slightly, encouraging Amber to deepen the kiss and use her tongue.
She rubbed her leg against Amber’s, then wrapped it around her waist and held her close against her body. Even though Amber held her wrists, she could still use her legs to bring Amber closer.
“I have handcuffs upstairs,” Amber whispered when she pulled back. “Do you want to play with them?”
“Okay,” Kalinda said, intrigued. She’d never been handcuffed before. She was enjoying Amber’s playfulness.
“Come upstairs with me and get naked. I have to find them. I have them hidden in my drawer.” Amber let go of her wrists, giving her a nudge toward the stairs.
Kalinda walked upstairs and took her clothes off as she walked, leaving them scattered on the floor. When she got up there to the bedroom, Amber was there, waiting for her. She pulled Kalinda over to the bed, and handcuffed her around the headboard.
“We need to talk,” Kalinda told her, reminding her that sex wasn’t the only reason she was here.
“Can it wait until after I’ve had my way with you?” Amber asked her as she crawled between Kalinda’s legs, trailing her fingers over Kalinda’s thighs.
“Okay, I can live with that,” Kalinda said breathlessly as Amber buried her face between her legs.
***
Kalinda lay curled up in Amber’s bed. She’d given Amber multiple orgasms after Amber had released her from the handcuffs. They were relaxing together in each other’s arms, and now she was trying to figure out how to bring up the conversation that had been bugging her.
“So, you know how you wanted to talk about keeping secrets?” Kalinda said as she traced her fingers around Amber’s breasts.
“What do you mean?” Amber asked her, moaning softly as Kalinda touched her nipples and started to gently massage her breasts.
“I mean, us, this, whatever it ends up becoming between us. I don’t want to have to pretend we are single women who like men the entire time I’m in school. I just don’t swing that way.” Kalinda told her bluntly. “But, I can promise you that I have connections to keep you in school to make sure they don’t use your sexual orientation against you. You don’t have to live in fear.”
“I don’t know, Kalinda. It’s just not that simple. Have you ever had something that could be used against you that you were worried about?” Amber sat up and scooted until she was sitting cross legged on the bed. She put a pillow over her lap and hugged it to her chest to cover herself.
“If I tell you my darkest secret, will you promise not to completely freak out and hate me?” Kalinda asked her, debating on telling her the truth. She’d never told anyone her secret before and hoped that if she told the truth, it wouldn’t hurt their budding romance. The one advantage was no one would believe Amber if she did freak out and tell anyone. Kalinda debated in her brain for a minute deciding what the right thing to do was.
“I’m listening. I promise I won’t freak out or tell anyone,” Amber said and then squeezed her arms around Kalinda’s waist.
Kalinda thought about what she was about to say. She could trust Amber, she decided. It wasn’t an intellectual decision, but an intuitive one, one that she could trust because of her shifter nature. Amber was genuine, and genuinely cared for Kalinda. It would be enough. Taking a deep breath, Kalinda opened her mouth and confided her darkest secret. “I’m a cat.”
“What?” Amber said, her eye brows knitting together as she looked confused.
“I’m a cat,” Kalinda repeated slowly.
“Like a furry?” Amber asked her.
“No, like a cat shifter. Like, I literally can turn into a cat. An animal cat. Like a pet house cat.” Kalinda said and then got up out of the bed. “Would you like me to show you?”
“Is it gross?” Amber asked her, looking confused. “I mean, I don’t really get what you’re saying.”
Kalinda got off the bed and stood in the middle of Amber’s bedroom. Calling upon the little kitty inside of her, she shifted in front of Amber. Her tail twitched and she looked up at Amber from the floor. She knew as a house cat, she wasn’t very scary to people, but just that she shifted shapes could give the poor girl a heart attack. She watched Amber, who hadn’t moved. Her mouth was still hanging open and so Kalinda jumped up on the bed and sat next to her. Letting out a soft mew she nudged Amber with her head and started to purr.
Amber stared down at her for a moment and then shook her head. “I don’t know if I should believe what I’m seeing, if this is the coolest thing in the entire world, or if I should be scared out of my freaking mind. This is…unreal.”
Kalinda rubbed up against Amber for a few minutes and let her pet her before hopping off the bed and shifting back to her human form. Then she sat down next to Amber again. Sitting on the bed, the two girls just stared at each other for a few moments.
“Well, now you know my deepest, darkest secret, so believe me when I say I can understand you wanting to keep things close to your chest,” Kalinda said, shrugging. “However, sexual orientation is something we can learn to work around, if you’re open to it. This, however…I don’t know what would happen to me if people knew I could shift into a house cat.”
“How long have you been able to do it?” Amber asked as she watched Kalinda intently. She didn’t seem totally freaked out, but she had a shocked expression on her face that had Kalinda questioning her judgement in showing her the truth.
“Since I was a kid. I fell out of a tree, and before I hit the ground, I was a cat. As I was falling, all I did was think that a cat wouldn’t get hurt, and the next thing I know, I’m landing on all fours and our family dog is chasing me out of the yard.” Kalinda shook her head. “We eventually worked it out so he wouldn’t chase me when I was in the backyard, but he hated cats.”
“And your parents never knew?” Amber’s eyes widened when she realized all the possibilities of being a cat. “Wait, is this how you found out about me and Mary?”
“Well, don’t be mad, okay?” Kalinda cringed, realizing that admitting to being a peeping tom could effectively ruin their budding relationship and any trust between them. “It wasn’t exactly on purpose. I was just wandering around the neighborh
ood and saw Mary and you together through the window. I thought you were beautiful. Later, when I realized Mary and you weren’t…serious, I took a chance to get to know you.”
“You spied on me?” Amber gasped. She scooted back away from Kalinda for a moment, looking shocked.
“I didn’t mean to. Listen Amber, I sometimes turn into a cat, and wander around. This neighborhood is safe, and there are lots of high trees here. It was just coincidence that I saw you and Mary together, but once I saw you, I couldn’t get over how beautiful you were.”
Amber didn’t move back to Kalinda’s side, and instead stared at Kalinda, her expression horrified and embarrassed.
Kalinda dropped her head down and then looked up, grabbing at Amber’s hand. “Please believe me when I say that nothing I did was intentional and my attraction for you is because of you, and nothing I saw you do with Mary. I just shared my deepest, darkest secret with you. I’m telling you the truth, I’m throwing myself out there. This is hard for me, because I’ve never told anyone my secret before. I’m sorry that part of that includes me seeing you in a private moment, but I didn’t go out of my way to find you, it just happened.”
“I don’t know whether to be impressed or disturbed by all of this. I need some time to think. You can stay the night because it’s so late, but don’t come back until I call you.” Amber told her.
“Okay,” Kalinda whispered, feeling her heart break.
Amber rolled over with her back to Kalinda, and ignored her for the rest of the night.
Kalinda lay awake, having trouble sleeping. She could feel Amber slipping away from her, and she tried not to panic. She’d never felt this way about anyone before, and the idea of losing Amber was terrifying. She didn’t know how to fix it.
Getting up before Amber’s alarm was due to go off, she wrote her a note and then left, going back to her dorm.
Ball’s in your court. I want you, I think we have something special. Let me know when you’re ready to talk. I’ll be waiting. –K
Going back, she got ready for classes, and for the rest of the day, Kalinda felt like she’d failed herself. She had trouble focusing, but this time it was because she was feeling so down, instead of yesterday, when she’d felt so excited about being with Amber.
Writing notes for her classes, she wasn’t expecting Amber to text her, but she’d been hopeful.
But Amber didn’t text or call.
This went on for the next few days, Kalinda watching her phone, feeling anxiety about not knowing where she stood, and waiting. Finally, she got sick of it and tracked Amber down in the library. The library was empty except for Amber, who was shelving books. Sneaking up on Amber, Kalinda cornered her in the back of the library in a dark corner.
Amber gasped, startled as Kalinda backed her up against the book shelves. Before Amber could stop her, Kalinda kissed her, pressing herself against Amber. Amber didn’t fight her; instead she kissed her back and wrapped her arms around Kalinda’s neck. Satisfied with the response, it kindled the hope in her chest. She knew she’d taken a risk throwing herself at Amber, and she just hoped it was the nudge Amber needed to move forward with her.
After a few minutes she pulled her head back to look at Amber.
“Can we talk tonight? Please?” Kalinda asked her, her heart racing, praying that Amber would say yes.
“Okay.” Amber nodded, her lips swollen from Kalinda’s kisses and her breaths coming in fast, sharp little gasps. “I’m sorry I didn’t get back to you.”
“I was getting scared you never would.”
“Sorry. It was so much to deal with, you know? And then I had a big final I was studying for and I’ve been working overtime due to all the people here using the library for finals.”
“It’s okay. I just wasn’t ready to give up on you.” Kalinda touched Amber’s cheek. “I’m falling in love with you and I want a chance to see if this can go somewhere. I trusted you with my secrets, and now I need you to trust me.”
“We can talk tonight.” Amber told her, but her face was blank, as if she were hiding her expression from Kalinda. It made Kalinda nervous, but she nodded.
Reaching down to pick up her book, Kalinda shot a look over her shoulder at Amber, who was touching her lips with her fingers. She was no longer looking at Kalinda. Instead, she looked thoughtful for a moment before redirecting her attention back to the shelves and the books in front of her.
Kalinda wished that she was a mind reader instead of a cat shifter. That would be a helpful power. Being able to shift into a housecat wasn’t very useful.
Fun at times, yes. Useful? Not really.
***
Knocking on Amber’s door later that night, Kalinda was practicing speeches in her head, the things she wanted to say to Amber. She was hoping that it would make a difference and Amber would accept everything and fall into Kalinda’s arms.
“Come in,” Amber told her. She was dressed in sweats and had no socks on. Her hair was in a messy ponytail and she looked like she’d been crying.
“Are you okay?” Kalinda asked her, concerned.
“Not really, Mary’s friends found out about our interlude and they told the dean. He pulled me into his office and said my scholarship is under review and I might get kicked out.” Amber sniffled and walked to the kitchen, not bothering with pleasantries. She went straight for the whiskey bottle, and poured herself an extra-large drink, taking it straight back.
“I can help fix this.” Kalinda told her and pulled her cell phone out. All it would take was one phone call to her mother. Kalinda never asked for anything, and her mother would do it for her without a second thought. “Let me help, Amber, please?”
“Are you doing this because you want to sleep with me, or because you truly want to help?” Amber asked. She poured herself another drink, eyeing Kalinda over the glass.
“I would do this for you because you’re a good person. You’re working hard to get through school and you don’t deserve to have people judge you for your sexual orientation. The fact I have feelings for you doesn’t hurt me wanting to help you though. I won’t lie to you, Amber, even if you don’t always like how I word the truth. I promise you honesty. I want to help you, and I would do it even if we hadn’t slept together, and if I hadn’t told you all my secrets.”
“Fine. If you think you can fix this, be my guest.” Amber poured another shot.
Kalinda walked over and took the bottle from her. “Drink some water or coffee, or both. Go sit down on the couch and let me make a couple of phone calls, and behave yourself. Don’t do this to yourself just because you’re upset. Let me help you.” Kalinda gave her a push toward the couch. She hadn’t taken Amber for the type to drink under stress, but she supposed when everything she worked for was being threatened, she could understand the reaction. But Amber didn’t have to deal with this alone, and Kalinda wouldn’t let her go down that path if she could redirect her.
“All right, fine,” Amber muttered and went to sit on the couch.
Kalinda dialed her mother, explaining the situation and her relationship with Amber. She’d expected more from her mother than a few moments of silence while she absorbed the news. Her mother was a pretty accepting woman in a lot of ways, yet Kalinda had never told her about her ability to shape shift. It was a secret she’d never told anyone, until Amber. That alone told Kalinda how special Amber was to her. She tried to impress that fact on her mother without giving details.
“I can handle this. That poor young lady,” her mother muttered into the phone. “I cannot believe in this day and age they would treat her like that. What bigots!”
“I know Mom, she deserves better. She’s a good person and she’s a hard worker. I appreciate you dealing with this for me.” Kalinda was amazed and grateful that her mom was being so accepting of everything.
She didn’t get out unscathed, though—she got snagged into promising to come home for Christmas, and bringing her new girlfriend so her parents could meet her.
&
nbsp; Kalinda answered, “I’ll invite her, Mom, but she’s been pretty private up until this point about her orientation. This is why this whole situation is destroying her emotionally. It’s not fair.”
“Life isn’t fair, Kalinda. You’ll learn that the hard way, but don’t give up.” Her mom talked for a few more minutes about other stuff, and promised to call back the next day to confirm that Amber’s scholarship was safe and she didn’t need to worry about Mary and her friends anymore.
Putting her cell back in her pocket, Kalinda went out to the couch and saw Amber crying. Not saying a word, Kalinda curled up behind her and wrapped her arms around Amber. She just held her for a while, giving her closeness and comfort.
“I’m sorry. I normally don’t drink this much, but it’s been a hell of a last couple of days,” Amber finally said, sniffling.
“It’s okay. My mom will confirm that your scholarship is safe tomorrow. She’s going to handle it, okay? You are going to be fine, your education is safe, I won’t let anyone harm you.” She meant it. She was surprised how possessive she felt about Amber already, feeling the need to protect her fiercely. It was strange, because she’d never felt this way about anyone before.
“You feel like you are too good to be true,” Amber said and then turned in her arms. She looked Kalinda in the eyes, searching her face for something. She must have found what she was looking for, because she threw her arms around Kalinda’s neck and kissed her hard.
Kalinda kissed her back, letting her hands wander over Amber’s body. She stuck her hands up Amber’s sweatshirt. Sighing when she realized that Amber had no bra on, she cupped her breasts and played with her nipples, rolling them between her fingers and thumbs.
“I don’t know what it is about you, but I can’t resist you, Kali,” Amber whispered as she pushed her body against Kalinda’s. “I can overlook the cat thing, I can overlook you spying on me, but whatever we have brewing between us, we need to figure out what it is. I don’t want another broken heart.”
“I have no intention of breaking your heart, and I’m hoping you won’t break mine. I’m here because I want to be. I’m here because I think you’re pretty freaking amazing. I’m here because I want to do things to your delectable little body that if I whispered the fantasies in my head out loud, it would curl your toes before I even touched you. I’m willing to put my heart on the line.” Kalinda told her and kissed Amber’s shoulders and neck, pressing her fingers into the plump mound of her breasts and working her hands lower. Pushing the waistband out of the way, she put a hand between Amber’s thighs. Finding Amber wet, Kalinda closed her eyes and groaned for a moment. She wanted nothing more than to bury her face between Amber’s legs and make her scream with multiple orgasms, but first, she needed to focus on talking to Amber.
