“We have a guest cottage that you two are welcome to stay in until you feel you can leave. Think about it, and I’ll be back in a bit.” Dr. Miller left.
Jake looked at Liberty, who stood watching him. The small guest cottage wouldn’t work for the two of them, at least, not for him, so he had to convince her to go back to the ranch. The line between doing the right thing and doing what he wanted to do was very thin right then. He took a breath and said, “Call Seth.”
Liberty took out her phone. “Seth needs to see you and talk to you. Why don’t you do a video call? You did fine with Roger.”
“Okay,” he said, and she put in the call, then handed him the phone as Seth showed on the screen. “Hey, Seth.”
“Jake. What’s happening?”
“It’s all good, better than good,” he said. “The fever’s broken. The doctor said that this is a win.”
“Thank goodness,” he saw him say. “Boy, am I glad you and Libby are there with him. Ben and I couldn’t have gotten there. This storm is unbelievable.”
“I’m here and staying, so you take care of what you need to there. When he’s awake, maybe we can get him on a video call with you and Ben.”
“Absolutely,” Seth said. “Oh, Max said to tell you the dog is doing great, and thanks for giving him a place to crash between shifts.”
Jake didn’t think he read Seth right. “Max…he called you? How, if he’s still at the ranch?”
“He said the landline’s up and working again. He called in a favor and the phone company got it fixed.”
“Terrific. I’ll call you soon,” he said, and hung up.
Before Jake could say anything to Liberty, the doctor was back, “So, are you staying here?”
Jake exhaled. “It seems the landline is fixed at the ranch.”
He looked at Liberty and said, “If it’s okay with you, we’ll both head home.”
She nodded and Jake spoke to the doctor. “As long as you call us when Sarge is awake or if something comes up, we’ll go back to the ranch.”
“I will certainly call either way.”
Jake stood, holding to the rail for a second to make sure his legs could support him as the doctor left.
Liberty came closer and smiled at him. She’d done so much, been so caring, and just having her there had made all the difference for him. She’d grounded him when he’d felt as if he were going to scatter into nothingness. He owed her more than she’d ever know. “Are you ready to go?” she asked.
“Just a minute,” he said, and turned to bend over Sarge. “I know you probably can’t hear me, but I’ll be back tomorrow, and we can call Seth and Ben.” He rested his hand on the man’s shoulder. “You’re going to be okay,” he said, then turned back to Liberty.
Without a word, she reached out to him and held to him tightly for a long moment. He let himself hold her, then knew he had to let go, even though he never wanted to. She looked up at him, concern in her green eyes. “Are you okay?”
He exhaled. “I’m doing a lot better.”
“Me, too,” she said, and slipped her arm in his. “Now, Pax is waiting.”
JAKE WAS AT the foot of the staircase when Libby came downstairs with the dog after changing into black leggings and an emerald green oversize shirt. Her hair was free around her shoulders, and her feet were bare. She stopped on the last step. “Did Max leave?”
“Yes, he had a call. He said to say goodbye to you, and he thinks Pax is a lucky mutt,” he said. “I finally put the groceries away.”
“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to thank him enough for helping with Pax and getting the phone fixed, but I wanted to get comfortable when we got back.”
Jake let his eyes flick over her. “I’d say mission accomplished.”
“Why don’t you change and I’ll make some real hot chocolate with whole milk. I’ll add a candy cane to stir it with.”
“Okay, you make the drinks, and I’ll get the fire and music going.”
Libby got busy in the kitchen while Jake restarted the music and laid the fire. By the time the flames were leaping in the hearth, she was back with two mugs in her hands. Jake took one and sat in what was becoming his chair, positioned to face the tree and her. As she settled across from him, she was watching him, probably to see his reaction when he tasted the hot chocolate.
He stirred with the candy cane, took a drink, then grimaced. “Talk about drinking dishwater,” he said.
She looked stunned and he quickly said, “Kidding, just kidding. It’s wonderful.”
“That’s mean,” she said, but smiled with relief. “I’ll forgive you because you restarted the music.”
“You said you’d tell me why Christmas is such a huge thing for you, as soon as you had good hot chocolate to drink.”
She hesitated. “Why are you so interested?”
“I can see how important it is for you to do Christmas up right with Roger. I’d like to know why.”
She took a drink before she answered him. “We’ve never spent Christmas together. He was gone last year on-site, and I wanted this one to be special.”
“But why are you so Christmas-crazy?” Jake said.
“This is good hot chocolate, so, okay. I’ll tell you. The second year I was with the Connors, they asked me if I liked being with them, and I said I did. Then they said, if I wanted to stay with them, would it be okay if they adopted me. They actually said they loved me, which I didn’t particularly believe, but I agreed. We went through so many court visits and interviews.” She smiled slightly. “Then we went to court just before Thanksgiving, and the judge was nice and let me pick out that teddy bear from a bunch she had in the courtroom. I think I understood the adoption would come soon but was afraid to ask anything about it in case it didn’t happen.”
She sighed, and the smile lingered on her lips. “Then Christmas was getting close, and one by one the other kids were switched to a placement somewhere else, and on Christmas Eve I was the only one left. We were sitting around the Christmas tree, and I told Dad and Mom that I was sorry I didn’t have a Christmas present for them.”
She closed her eyes for a moment, then blinked and looked back at him. “Well, they both got up and came over to me on the couch and sat down with me between them. Then they hugged me, and Mom was crying, and Dad said that I was the best Christmas present they’d ever been given.”
She bit her lip, but Jake could tell it was more to fight the tears he saw become bright in her eyes. She took another breath. “They told me we were a brand-new family, a real family, and nothing could ever change that. And Christmas is the best time of the year for families to be together.”
She wiped at tears that ran silently down her cheeks. “My family. All mine, really mine, and they loved me, and I believed it. I’ve loved Christmas ever since, and with Roger, I want the same thing. Real family and real love.”
Jake released a breath he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding. That had all happened years ago, but Jake felt such happiness at what Liberty had found on that Christmas Day. “I see why it’s so special to you.” And why she was wanting Roger there this year. She was planning a new family, and Roger was the main part of that plan. Another barrier fell in place, blocking him even more from ever believing he could be anything Liberty wanted.
She stood quickly, looked at him and said, “Pax wants in.” Then she walked across the room to the entryway. Jake waited, then finally Pax came running toward the Christmas tree. The dog looked up at its candy-cane-free branches, then flopped down onto the floor, looking totally bummed out.
“He knows what he likes,” Jake said.
Liberty sat down and looked over at him. “Can I ask you a favor, please?”
After what she’d told him moments ago, he’d do any favor she wanted from him. “What’s that?”
“I had always plan
ned to tell the man I married that story before I shared it with others. It was sort of like, ‘here I am, and this is who I am.’ I mean, he knows I was adopted when I was young, but I wanted him to understand why I’m the way I am now. Everything in life changes us, and that changed me forever. So, if you talk to Roger some time or other, could you not mention I told you about it, please?”
He hadn’t expected that to be the favor. “I won’t mention anything about it.”
He saw her shoulders lower as she sighed, then she sank back into the chair. “Thank you so much.”
Roger had a lot of wonderful things coming to him when he married Liberty. “No problem,” he said, then shifted everything. “How many days until Christmas?”
She frowned as she was obviously trying to figure that out. “Soon we’ll be at the twelve-day mark. You know, like the song, ‘The Twelve Days of Christmas’?”
“I hate that song. Who in their right mind would give a lady a partridge in a pear tree?” When Liberty laughed at that, Jake could almost hear it, soft and sweet, like her voice was in the dream. His chest tightened. He was losing it. “Yes, and why would she want eight maids a-milking?”
“How about six geese a-laying?” she asked and was laughing again.
He thought he’d never seen anyone as beautiful as Liberty was at that moment.
“Thanks, but no thanks,” he saw her say. “But the five golden rings, now, I’d take them in a heartbeat.”
He thought about the ring she’d been wearing when he’d met her. She probably would have five golden rings from Roger sooner or later. He drank more hot chocolate, knowing he was leaving soon now that the phone was repaired.
“Why don’t you go and check the phone and make sure it’s working?”
“I can’t believe I didn’t when we got here,” she said, then immediately got up and carried her mug with her into the office. He expected her to call Roger or her parents if the phone was connected, but she was back in less than a minute. “It has a dial tone,” she said.
“So you can call Roger.”
Instead of a smile, that brought a frown that tugged a fine line between her green eyes. “Yes, I can.” Then she totally changed the subject. “I need to sleep down here tonight.”
That was not going to happen. “Why?”
“Because I won’t hear the phone ring if I’m sleeping upstairs. Just in case they call from Wicker Pines. I’ll be back in a bit,” she said, and went into the office again and closed the door this time. She was right, and she had to be downstairs to hear the phone. He could sleep upstairs in his old room, and Liberty could come and get him if anything happened.
A sudden pain hit him in his right ear. It was gone almost immediately. It didn’t leave dizziness or nausea in its wake, but he could still feel a tight sensation in that ear, an odd feeling.
He decided right then that when he left here, he’d find a hotel in Cody near Wicker Pines, then contact Cal. He wanted to find out what was happening with his hearing, and Cal could arrange for the best of the best, courtesy of Madison, to come to Cody to check him out.
He drained the last of his drink and stood carefully. He’d come here alone; he’d leave alone. That sounded so empty to him, but he’d designed his life that way, and it was what it was.
* * *
LIBBY SAT AT the desk with the receiver in her hand but didn’t put in the call to Roger. When a loud beeping sound came from the earpiece, she put it back on the cradle. She wasn’t going to tell him about her first Christmas as a Connor over the phone. He wouldn’t have the time to listen. She’d share it when he got here. She figured she’d told Jake about it because he was a fellow ex-foster child. That was probably it.
She knew who she really wanted to talk to and reached for the receiver again and called her parents. It was good to hear her mother’s voice and the excitement in it when she told her more about the summer camp. That lifted her heart. To know they were with her uncle and his family for Christmas made her happy, too. She just wished that Roger had shown as much excitement about what she was doing as her parents did.
When she’d hung up, she went back into the great room. Jake was crouched by the hearth putting more wood on the fire. All the lights were off except for those on the Christmas tree, and “I’ll Be Home for Christmas” was playing. She stood very still, taking in the scene in front of her.
She had an apartment in Seattle, but this place felt like home to her right then. She knew she’d speak to Seth about the cabin, to see if she could use it while she worked here. That made her smile. Jake stood and spotted her across the room.
He motioned to the couch. “It’s all yours for the night.”
“Thank you,” she said, stepping closer. “Just for tonight.”
“Did you get a call in to Roger?” he asked.
“I didn’t call him. I talked to my mom.”
“She’s okay?”
“She’s fine. She and Dad are in Georgia with my dad’s only brother and his family. They’re having a great time, and they’re planning on coming out here in the spring to see what I’m doing.”
“That’s good, right?”
“Yes, great,” she said, and bit her bottom lip.
“Why don’t you seem thrilled?” he asked.
That took her aback. “Why would you ask that?”
“I’ve noticed when you’re bothered and trying to figure things out, you have a tell.”
“What?”
“A tell, like in a poker game. It’s something that a person does that they don’t realize they’re doing, such as if they have a good hand, they might fidget with their chips or tap their fingers on the felt. If you know what to look for, you can almost read their minds.”
“Okay, what am I doing?”
“You bite your bottom lip or sort of nibble on it when you don’t know what to say or if you’re bothered. It’s never when you’re happy or sure about what’s going on.”
She barely kept herself from putting her hand over her mouth. She was bothered, but she didn’t like him seeing that so easily. “Seriously?”
“Yes. Now, what’s going on? Is it me?”
“No, it’s not you. I’m just thinking, period,” she said and turned to go to the couch and sit down. Jake followed her and took time turning on the side light before he sat down, too.
“So, what are you thinking about?” he asked.
“I really don’t want to talk about anything right now.”
He didn’t move for a long moment, then stood and said, “Okay, sleep well.” With that, he walked away and out of the room. She heard him going up the stairs, then his footsteps overhead. When there were no more sounds from him, she sat there with the music still going and the fire crackling. Jake had caught her. She was bothered, but it wasn’t about work or the weather. It was Roger, and that worried her more than she could say.
* * *
JAKE’S DREAMS USUALLY dissolved upon waking, and he just remembered if they were good or bad, until he’d dreamed about Liberty dancing with him. He remembered that one perfectly. Now he knew he was dreaming again, but he was in the old cabin, going to the door, stepping outside onto the porch. It was a clear night with snow everywhere. He knew it was cold, but he didn’t feel it as he scanned the landscape, sparkling in the glow of a full moon.
He was in that shifting reality where he could hear Christmas music, with no idea where it came from. Then he looked into the distance from the top step and saw Liberty making her way slowly toward him, a red beanie covering her hair, her green jacket on, and she was illuminated perfectly by moonlight.
“Liberty?” he called. She stopped and looked up, saw him, then she smiled and waved. He was down the steps quickly, sinking into knee-deep snow and starting to feel the cold. “Liberty!” he called. Then she was almost there, holding out her hands to him, laughing.<
br />
“I want to stay here with you.” Her voice came to him soft and honey smooth, but her words became a lie as she started to recede before he could touch her hands. She was leaving, going back, fading until she dissolved into brilliant prisms of moonlight. He lunged to grab her, but all his hands held was the sparkle of moonbeams. Sorrow flooded through him, then everything became soft nothingness.
When Jake woke up, it was because Liberty was standing over him. Her hand was on his shoulder, gently shaking him. “Sorry to wake you up,” he saw her saying. “But I wanted to call Julia and talk to her, if it’s okay with you?”
He was having trouble shaking free of that dream, that sense of loss, but Liberty was right there. There were no moonbeams, just her dressed in jeans and a white cable-knit sweater. She’d pulled her hair back from her face in a knot at the nape of her neck and looked as if she’d slept well. He could barely focus, the dream overlapping with reality. “Sure, call her, and I’ll get myself together.”
He freshened up and dressed in jeans and a gray thermal shirt. When he went downstairs and stepped into the great room, Liberty was just coming out of the office. She was smiling and something in him eased. “Sarge is sleeping. He woke to eat breakfast, then fell right back to sleep, and they’re encouraging that. So she suggested that we hold off until tomorrow to visit. He doesn’t seem to remember much about being sick, but he’s coherent when he’s speaking. Pretty good, huh?”
“Yes,” he said, happy for that. But he knew that it was time for him to leave.
“I can’t wait to see him again,” she said.
“Me, neither.” He wanted her there when he walked back into Sarge’s room tomorrow. He’d take a day to go with her to see Sarge, and when they got back, he’d explain he had to leave. He could be out of here before dark tomorrow night and contact Cal.
“I forgot some things yesterday because I only went into the food section at the store. I’d like to get some real dog shampoo for Pax. Also, I really want to get some marshmallows to make more hot chocolate. I was thinking I’d go to Eclipse since it’s closer than Cody.”
Harlequin Heartwarming December 2020 Box Set Page 63
