by BJ Wane
His jaw went rigid but his hand was gentle as he cupped her chin, checked her face and then slid his eyes down to the popped buttons on the top of her green satin prom dress. “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” she sighed, refusing to lie. “He just made me mad when he wouldn’t stop kissing me after I said enough. This,” she looked down at her top, “wasn’t on purpose. I pulled away from him…”
“That’s enough. Come on, I’ll drive you home.”
“Okay.” Feeling better already, she pushed to her feet and leaned against his tall frame, a strange shiver rippling through her. He boosted her up into his truck and leaned over her to fasten the seatbelt himself, his breath warm on her neck.
A longing swept through Tamara as he settled behind the wheel and wrapped one arm around her shoulders to pull her close as he drove. Her body felt strange, hot and cold all at once…
Tamara groaned and rolled over, shifting uncomfortably as she struggled to get back to sleep without plaguing memories haunting her. She drifted off again, this time her mind shifting to a later time and different scene, tiredness pulling her back under and leaving her powerless to stop the replay.
Her nipples beaded into tight pinpoints just from listening to Connor’s commanding voice, her pussy went damp from eyeing his taut buttocks clenching as he drove into the woman bent over the stack of hay bales. Sweat popped out along her brow and her legs grew cramped from her crouched position behind the door to the barn. The woman’s low moans switched to high-pitched wails as they climaxed together, the sight enough to make her fingers itch to slip inside her pants to tease her own orgasm to the surface as she eyed the bound, clenched hands of his willing partner. Bondage. So, the rumors were true. She was still assimilating that fact and picturing herself in the woman’s position as he helped her stand and Tamara noticed the bare flesh of her labia sported the same pinkness covering the woman’s buttocks.
Tamara grew hotter and her vaginal muscles spasmed as she imagined the pain of being slapped on such sensitive flesh. A sound escaped her tight throat, alerting the couple to her presence. Uh, oh…
Tamara awoke the next morning in a sweaty tangle of sheets, her body still shuddering from dreams that refused to leave her be, no matter how much time elapsed between the memories or how far she distanced herself from the man. Giving up on finding answers, she tumbled out of bed and padded into her attached bathroom. Amy ended up staying with her sister an extra day and planned to return today. It wouldn’t do to let her stepmother see her in such a befuddled state. Amy knew of her infatuation and wouldn’t need another reason to bring it up.
She felt better after lingering under a hot shower and downing two cups of coffee. Unable to put it off any longer, she entered her father’s office and took a seat behind his desk. Blinking back tears, she pulled up the ranch books and spent the morning going over the ledgers, noting the losses where rustlers had made off with a few head of cattle and the gains from the last sales. Profits remained marginal, but with any luck, Galahad’s offspring would bring in some extra cash by this time next year.
The Dunbar Ranch was almost four times the size of hers and from what she’d read, they had suffered a significantly higher number of losses from the thieves, so she counted herself, Amy and their few employees lucky in that aspect. It was no wonder Connor’s frustration pushed him into going off half-cocked after them.
Spending time with him again had reinforced how much she’d missed him, her reaction to one look from his searing blue eyes confirming she’d made the right decision in calling off her engagement. She was fond of Jeremy, but she couldn’t marry one man when she was in love with another. Her tepid responses to him during sex should have alerted her much sooner that it would never work, and she accepted full responsibility for the hurt she’d caused him. She knew only too well what it felt like to be regarded as nothing more than a friend.
Her phone signaled an incoming text, a reminder from Nan about their one o’clock get-together. Since Amy hadn’t returned yet, Tamara left her a note about her whereabouts and gladly set aside the rest of the ranch business for some much-needed girl time.
Chapter 4
Twenty minutes later, Tamara pulled her compact Mitsubishi SUV into a parking space in front of Nan’s teashop. Behind her, the fountain centered in the middle of the town square gurgled with a bubbly flow of water. Now that the air hinted of warmer temperatures soon to come, the fountain was only one of the things popping back up after a long, cold winter. Rising above the historic, three story brick buildings, the mountains appeared greener amidst the snow-capped elevations.
Sliding out of her vehicle, she took a deep, appreciative breath as she stepped up on the walk and reached for the door handle. A set of tinkling chimes pealed as she pushed it open and saw Nan standing at one of the quaint, wrought iron tables, talking with a redhead and brunette seated on the matching chairs. All three women looked up, Nan smiling and waving her over.
“There you are. Come and meet Sydney.” She nodded to the green-eyed redhead before waving her hand to the other woman peering at Tamara through black-framed glasses. “Avery moved to town a short time after Sydney.” The other girl’s light brown eyes shone in welcome.
“Hi. Nice to meet you both.” Tamara took the empty chair Nan nudged out with her foot.
“Tamara and I go back to grade school together.” Nan picked up Sydney’s left hand so Tamara could see the sparkling engagement ring. “The rock is from Caden Dunbar. Their engagement is just one thing you’ve missed since your last visit.”
Tamara ignored the reprimand in her friend’s voice as she leaned in for a closer look at the ring. “It’s beautiful. You must be special if you’ve tamed Caden.” Even before she had witnessed that scene in Connor’s barn, she had heard the rumors surrounding the wild Dunbar brothers and their kinky passions. She’d never been able to forget her first and only glimpse of Connor’s dominant side, or the interest and vivid dreams it had stirred.
Sydney laughed. “Trust me, Caden is not ‘tamed’.” She finger-quoted the word tamed. “But I wouldn’t want him to be. I fell for him just as he is.”
“Well, congratulations,” Tamara said, not sure how to respond to that.
Two more customers entered, drawing Nan’s attention. “Let me get your orders before I take theirs. Tamara, I have a new apple spice you’ll like and that goes good with the apple turnovers fresh from the bakery.”
Tamara groaned. “Yes to both, and if I gain weight, I’m not coming back.”
“I said that too, but here I am.” Avery sighed. “It’s a good thing Grayson likes my… curves.” She looked down with a rueful grimace.
Nan smiled. “I can’t believe you’re still blushing and stuttering after being with our sheriff for over two months.”
“Really?” Tamara remembered the good-looking, sexy sheriff coming out to the ranch to offer his personal condolences last year and knew he was well liked and respected in the county. She also knew he was included in the gossip surrounding the Dunbar brothers and a secret club the three had opened over six years ago. Before she had left, Nan revealed she’d just become a member and loved everything about the place.
“Her wheels are turning, girlfriends,” Nan smirked. “Yes, Tamara knows about The Barn and no, she doesn’t swing that way, at least not yet.” With that taunting remark, she pivoted and moved behind the glass-encased counter to brew their tea.
“You should know, Tamara, neither of us have been members long and are both new to the…” Avery waved her hand. “The… stuff that goes on there.”
Sydney rolled her eyes. “New, yes, compared to Nan. But we’re well past the newbie stage, thank goodness. It’s much more fun when the inhibitions are stripped away, provided the right person does the stripping. Nan says you’ve been living in Boise for a few years but grew up here.”
Tamara wondered if Sydney sensed how uncomfortable talk about the sex club Connor was part owner of made her. It wasn’t the men
tion of kink that rubbed her the wrong way, but picturing him with a different woman every weekend, indulging in stuff she’d only ever dreamed about since she’d gotten an up-close look at him in action.
“Yes, working as a physical therapist in a rehab, but I missed home,” she admitted as Nan returned with three steaming cups and a plate of turnovers.
“Then you shouldn’t have stayed away so long,” she rebuked her. “I plan on getting you drunk soon so I can pull the real reason you took that job out of you.”
“Ooh, I wanna join you,” Sydney insisted with a wicked grin.
“Me too. I’ve never had such good friends as Nan and Sydney and if you’re included now, Tamara, I say no secrets,” Avery piped in, ending with a decisive head nod.
Tamara had no idea what got into her. Maybe it was because she didn’t doubt Nan would do everything in her willpower to pull the truth from her and might succeed in getting her to spill the beans about her guilt over accepting Jeremy’s proposal when she’d known her feelings didn’t run deep enough to make such a commitment. Or, maybe it was because she couldn’t get Connor out of her mind and the mention of kink brought up the memory of that hot scene that had dampened her pussy more than any act of intercourse she’d indulged in before or after that prompted her to blurt out the truth without thought.
“Connor, that’s who happened.”
“I knew it!” Nan crowed.
Tamara narrowed her eyes as her friend plopped into the empty chair next to her. “You did not.”
She smirked. “Hon, you’ve had the hots for that man since you knew what the hots were. It’s not like you hid it.”
“Oh, God.” Dropping her head into her hands, Tamara groaned. “Was I that obvious?”
Sydney and Avery laughed as Nan quipped, “Afraid so, to everyone but Connor. The man either wore blinders around you or just plain didn’t want to go there. He can be as stubborn as you.”
She looked up and sighed. “That’s the truth.”
“What are you going to do?” Avery asked, sipping her tea.
Taking a big bite of the sweet turnover, she didn’t have to think about her answer as she said, “Nothing. He made it clear when he was tired of my antics when I was twenty-five that I’m nothing but a friend and I doubt that will change. I need to move on, and I need to do it here because here is where I want to be.”
“Near Connor.”
She glanced at Sydney and saw the question in her eyes. “Yes. I know he didn’t mean his hurtful words and he’ll always be my friend. I don’t want to lose that connection again.”
Slapping her hands down on the table, Nan surprised her by suggesting, “Come to the club. Meet some new people. There are several guys you’ll like, and who will be not only good to you but good for you.”
Tamara sputtered on a disbelieving laugh. “How am I supposed to move on at such a place? One, I’m not into kink, and two, he’ll be there.”
“Exactly. Show him you have grown up and can do whatever you want, including indulging in the same kinks as him.”
“Oh, good idea, Nan,” Sydney crooned.
Heat enveloped Tamara as she imagined Connor watching her with someone else, and her interest took hold. What could it hurt to explore the curiosity that had stirred to life the one time she’d watched him? She didn’t have to take it far, and what better way to start moving on than with someone who wouldn’t expect anything except for her to submit to his wishes for an hour?
But she needed clarification before taking such a big risk with the unknown. “What if I don’t want to participate, or I start something with someone and want to stop?”
Avery laid a light hand on her arm. “I fretted over things like that also, but Grayson showed me I was not only safe with him, but free to end things whenever I wanted. It was a heady feeling of power, I’ve got to admit.”
She looked at the three women staring at her with small smiles of expectation and thought, why the heck not? Why let Connor, who refused to change, keep her from exploring new things, seeking a new, or several new relationships? They didn’t have to lead to anything permanent; she had time to form a committed relationship later, after she worked him out of her system and could settle down with one person without feeling guilty because she wanted someone else more.
Before she could change her mind or think it to death, she reached for a second turnover with a nod. “I’m in, but only to observe, and you three better back me up and be there for me.”
“Fuck, yes,” Nan beamed.
An hour later, Tamara returned home still grappling with her decision to go as a guest to a BDSM club. Knowing about the place and what went on there and attending as an interested guest were two wildly different things, and she had to admit she would be out of her depth in such a place. So why, she asked herself as the front door opened and she saw Amy waiting for her with a broad smile of welcome, was she planning on going? With a mental headshake, she guessed seeing Connor again, touching him, hearing his voice, had left her more rattled and desperate than ever to get over him.
Putting all her insecurities and doubts aside, she skipped up the porch steps and threw her arms around her stepmother, happy to see her back again. She’d left only a few days after Tamara returned home and they still had a lot of catching up to do. “When did you get in?” Pulling back, Tamara basked in the warmth of Amy’s blue eyes and her motherly hug of welcome.
“Only thirty minutes ago. I love my sister, but it’s good to be home. How are you, Tammy?”
Amy’s nickname for her brought tears to her eyes, as did her embrace. Damn but she’d been on an emotional roller coaster since seeing Connor yesterday, and she didn’t like it. “Are you ever going to quit calling me Tammy?”
“Nope.” Pulling back, Amy looked her over with a critical eye before ushering her inside. “You look good. How was your visit to town and your first day on the new job?”
“Great. I like everyone at the clinic, and I love the changes Nan’s made to her teashop. She introduced me to two newcomers to Willow Springs this afternoon, who are very nice.”
“Let me guess,” Amy said as Tamara followed her into the kitchen and smelled something wonderful cooking in the oven. “That would be Sydney Greenbriar and Avery Pierce, Caden Dunbar and the sheriff’s new girls?”
Laughing, she plopped onto a kitchen chair at the small, round corner table. “I should have known you still keep up with who’s who and who’s doing what.”
“Of course. I’ve heard they’re all members of that club everyone likes to speculate about.” Amy shot her a sly glance as she joined Tamara at the table with a glass of tea. “You know, the one Connor Dunbar belongs to.”
“Oh, good grief…” Her stepmother thrived on the small-town gossip. Giving her a narrowed eyed, suspicious glare, Tamara knew it wasn’t a coincidence she brought up the exact subject she’d just discussed with her friend. “You talked to Nan already.”
“Guilty. I just got off the phone with her. She wants my help in making sure you don’t change your mind. I think it’s a grand idea. Show that man you’re not pining for him anymore and won’t be sitting around doing nothing now that you’re back for good.”
Tamara’s chest filled with warmth and her eyes grew misty with gratitude and pleasure stemming from the open, honest and supportive relationship she’d always enjoyed with her stepmother. Amy had encouraged her to confide in her as soon as her mother had taken off and made spilling her guts on more than one occasion easy to do, keeping their private ‘girl’ moments between the two of them. Her father had been wonderful, spoiling her and never stingy with his love and praise, but he was still her father and some things she could never imagine being comfortable enough to discuss with him.
“I’m not going to do anything, just visit, and socialize.” She allowed a small smile to curve her lips. “Besides, I think it would be fun to watch,” she teased, thinking it wouldn’t be the first time she’d indulged in voyeurism. Tamara had never spo
ken a word to anyone about the scene she’d stumbled upon when riding to Connor’s that day, not even to Amy or Nan. Some things were best kept private.
“You’re a good girl, hon, always have been. I’ve known those Dunbar boys, and several others who are members for ages, and trust them to look out for you. So, feel free to be a bad girl for a change. It’ll do you good.”
Tamara turned onto the highway praying she wasn’t making a mistake. Be a bad girl for a change. Amy’s suggestion had been replaying in her head for the last few days, and each time she’d thought about it, the stronger her desire grew to do just that despite her lingering unsurety. Shifting on the car seat, her bare buttocks tingled under the snug black skirt. It wasn’t the first time she’d worn a thong, but always before she’d been dressed to please and seduce Jeremy, each time hoping and praying her response to sex with him would improve. It never did, which was only one of the reasons she’d ended their engagement. Approaching the road off the highway that would take her to the club, she shoved those depressing thoughts aside, gripped the steering wheel tighter and made the turn.
Several bumpy minutes later, the narrow, unpaved lane leading to The Barn ended at a large, tree shrouded copse and gravel parking lot in front of the two-story restored farm structure. Tamara had heard rumors the Dunbars and Sheriff Monroe were partnering in a private club over seven years ago, and that the three of them had all lent a hand in converting an old barn into a gathering place for members to indulge in their kinky preferences. The townsfolk had always accepted the rumors, and likelihood of their truth with good-natured shrugs of indifference. Maybe a few older citizens continued to mumble under their breath, but for the most part, the intrigued speculation outweighed the snide criticism. What judgmental remarks had filtered back to members were brushed aside with unconcern.
Tamara turned off the engine and gazed around at the vehicles, trying to figure out who was already inside by makes and models. She hadn’t been back long enough to familiarize herself with certain changes, but she spotted Nan’s same sporty Nissan with as much relief as she felt when she didn’t see Connor’s truck. Maybe he would show up later tonight, but after giving Nan’s invitation serious thought the last four days and getting her stepmother’s not-so-surprising approval, she’d vowed to enjoy herself regardless of his presence or not.
