by BJ Wane
“I’m not,” she insisted, straightening and glaring down at him. “I can do this, I need to do this. If you won’t, then I’ll find someone who will.”
“Fuck that.” Dan tightened his arm around her as she struggled to rise. “You’re pushing me, and I don’t like it. You’ve never exhibited your independence with a Dom that I know of.”
Those soft lips he’d only delved past once twisted into a taunting grin. “That was then, this is now. I’m tired of waiting, wishing and wondering. Damn it, I want my life back. Maybe, if I’m successful in that, I’ll get my sanity back too.”
He saw the moment she thought she said too much. “You’re not crazy, Nan. I know you better than anyone else, except maybe your brother. Not only as a play partner here, but as a long-time friend. Even after what you’ve been through, you are the most grounded person I know, sure of what you want, and willing to go after it no matter what. Fuck, but I admire that about you.”
She narrowed those golden eyes and cocked her head. “Enough to give me what I want now?”
Stepped into that one, didn’t you, Shylock? It looked like she was going to force him to prove his point, damn it. Maybe she would surprise him again, like she just did over his lap. “Stand up.” Dan patted her soft thigh, sighing as she jumped eagerly to her feet. Her quick enthusiasm slipped a notch as he made short work of removing her corset, dropping the black leather on the seat and gripping her clammy hand. “If I put you on the cross, you know I won’t allow you to leave anything on. Like upstairs, now everyone down here will see your scars, will know you endured a horrendous ordeal.”
Ignoring her pale face, he led her to a footstool in front of a small sofa. He watched her face as he unclipped the cuffs at his waist, noting the stubborn set to her chin as he drew her hands behind her again and secured them together at the wrists. “I see you didn’t think of that.” Brushing his palm over her nipples, he asked, “Change your mind yet?”
Nan shook her head, but Dan refused to let her get away with that. With a swift drawback of his right hand, he swatted her ass hard enough to propel her against him. Clasping her upper arms, he demanded, “Answer me, Nan. You know better than to give me a non-verbal reply to a direct question.”
She didn’t turn away, but gave him a direct gaze as she replied, “No, I’m not changing my mind.” Leaning her head back with a haughty look, she added with a quiver, “Let them look.”
Dan nodded and stepped back, releasing her arms and pointing to the stool. “Kneel up. You know the position I want. Face the wall.”
There was no mistaking the flare of excitement that lit her eyes, or the tighter pucker of her nipples, but her lower lip still quivered with a noticeable touch of uncertainty before she sank her teeth into the pouty softness. Folding his arms, he didn’t offer to help her with the awkwardness of getting into position with her hands cuffed behind her. She wouldn’t expect help where he’d never given it before, not if she wanted to get back to where she’d been.
A titillating sense of satisfaction coursed through Dan as Nan settled back on her heels, her fingers brushing her ankles, her spread knees unfurling the puffy folds of her glistening labia. The damp, dark pink swath of her pussy drew his eyes and stirred his cock. He ran his fingers through his hair, hoping he wasn’t pushing himself too far. His long dry spell was biting him on the ass, and not in a good way.
“Very good.” He traced down one scar before pivoting and, spotting Leslie, crooked his finger for her to come over.
“Master Dan.” Leslie’s eyes widened as they landed on Nan’s back, but Dan placed a finger across her lips, glad to see anger over her friend’s suffering tightening her face.
“Would you ask Master Grayson for a bottled water for my sub and a beer for me, please?”
“Of course, sir. Be right back.”
Dan turned and patted Nan’s still pink buttocks as he moved in front of her. “You’re holding up well. I’m proud of you, baby.” Her tense shoulders relaxed, and a smile blossomed across her face. He held a finger up, indicating silence and then turned to see Connor and Tamara approaching with the drink order he gave Leslie.
“We offered to deliver these for Leslie,” Connor greeted him, handing over the beer.
“Thanks. I’ll take that, Tamara, thank you.” Opening the water, he held it to Nan’s lips. “Lift up enough to drink and give your shoulders and back a break.”
She accepted the drink with a grateful look, and as she finished, he leaned forward to lick the water dripping off her chin. By the time he glanced back at the other couple, both had noticed the scars and lost their amiable expressions.
“What the fucking hell?” Connor ground out in a furious whisper, his hand tight around his wife’s. Tamara’s face showed horror, her gray eyes swimming with unshed tears.
Like Leslie, Dan placed a finger over her lips, saying quietly, “New Orleans, and yes, the two of us are dealing with it.”
“And who is dealing with the son-of-a-bitch responsible?”
Nan peered around at Connor, twin red splotches staining her face, a bold fierceness glittering in her eyes. “The courts, come August first.”
Connor moved in front of her, cupped her nape and brought her face up to his. “You should have told us, at the very least, told your closest friends.” He brushed the softest of kisses over her lips. “Thank God you’re home, sweetie.”
“Nan.” Tamara reached for her friend, but Connor grabbed her, tugging her against his side.
“We’re headed up to the loft to relieve Devin.”
Dan looked back at Nan and knew she had won this battle. He just hoped she continued to win the war. “We’re headed that way. If the cross is available, hold it for me, would you?”
“Sure thing.”
As Master Dan escorted her across the lower floor toward the stairs with a hand wrapped around her cuffed wrists, Nan vacillated between chagrin over the revelation of her ordeal and the return of the electric buzz she always experienced when naked in front of a slew of onlookers. She’d never been shy; just the opposite. She had embraced public exposure with as much ease and pleasure as she had erotic pain and bondage. But that sweeping thrill didn’t keep her from shying away from the thundercloud of fury swirling in Master Grayson’s gray/green eyes or tuning out Avery’s shocked gasp Master Dan silenced with a snap of his fingers. The truth had to come out, didn’t it? Now that it had, they could move on and put it behind them, if she could just make it up the stairs to the dimly lit loft with her composure intact.
“You’re surprising the hell out of me, Nan,” Dan stated halfway up the stairs, his proud look warming her to her toes.
“Don’t tell anyone, but I’m shocking the hell out of myself, too.”
A deep laugh rumbled from his chest, drawing her eyes to the lift of his wide shoulders, the tightening of his biceps as he assisted her on the final step. “It looks like the St. Andrew Cross is all ours.” Nan’s fear of another lapse returned with a sudden cold chill that racked her body and drew his sharp gaze as they stopped in front of the padded cross. “Nan? Do we continue or spend the evening socializing? Belle is still yours, either way.”
She gazed upon the apparatus and memories assailed her, good memories of scenes between her and her favorite Dom. Squaring her shoulders, she said in a strong voice, “We continue, Sir. Please.”
“Good enough.” Reaching behind her, he removed the cuffs. “We didn’t discuss your safeword downstairs, and I apologize for that lapse. I’m so used to doing scenes with you without the need to go over safety measures, it slipped my mind. Do you want to use red, or do you still like panda?”
“Panda, and I didn’t think anything about it, either.” She relaxed and smiled. “I’m still comfortable with you, even dealing with all my shit.”
“It’s our shit to deal with now. Stand here a minute. I want to get something.”
Nan watched him stride to the toy cabinet on the back wall, wondering what objects he wo
uld choose to add to the scene. When he returned carrying a packaged double dildo, her buttocks clenched and her pussy wept. God, it had been so long since she’d been filled with anything except despair, fear and anger.
“I see you don’t object to the dual phalluses. I thought they would help distract you from bad memories. Face the cross, please.”
Master Dan twirled his finger for her to turn around, giving her no time to second guess her decision, or to fret as he bound her wrists and ankles in a wide V in record time. Then her heart stumbled as he began wrapping her arms to the post using soft rope, stopping when he reached her upraised elbow. “Sir?” Nan jerked and her arm didn’t budge. The extra binding rendering that limb immovable both alarmed and excited her, the odd combination of emotions leaving her confused.
Dan ran his hand down her back and over her tight buttocks; the light touch sparking a thread of anticipation. “Deep breath. You’re fine.” He did the same to her other arm, telling her, “I’ve left the ends loose. You can work your way out of the ropes if you want, but they’re still secure enough to hold against minor resistance. One tug, and I can free you, Nan.”
“Thank you, Sir.” His foresight helped spur her arousal and settle her uncertainty.
Putting his face next to hers, he rubbed her trembling lips with one finger. “I’ve always been here for you, hon. You forgot that while you were gone. Now, quiet, unless you need to use your safeword.”
To Nan’s surprised excitement, she found herself relaxing against the cross as he bound her legs from ankles to knees, the snug ropes lending her security she didn’t know she needed. A mellowness invaded her body as Master Dan caressed her, squeezing her thighs, ghosting his fingers between her buttocks, tickling her sides, cupping her breasts. He played with her to the point of growing frustration, stirring a hunger for more, building heat and longing everywhere he touched.
“I think you’re ready for the dildos,” he whispered in her ear as he squeezed her buttocks. With a sharp nip on her lobe, he stepped back, and she heard him tearing open the package.
She braced herself for the invasion of the toys, gasping as he slid the rounded ends past her openings, her juices easing the way into her pussy, a copious amount of lube aiding the insertion into her rectum. Pure, unadulterated lust infused her from head to toe as the dildos stretched and filled her one slow inch at a time. She groaned, rocking her hips with the full invasion, the move shifting the embedded phalluses to rub against long-neglected nerve endings starving for attention.
“Please, Master,” she begged without even realizing it until the leather strands of his flogger snapped against her butt.
“Tsk, tsk, girl. I believe I told you to keep quiet. Concentrate on the toys, Nan. I’ll go slow, but don’t hesitate to stop me if you become afraid.”
The warning behind his stern tone wasn’t lost on her, and she focused her gaze on Sue Ellen, who was bound on the fucking swing in the corner, enjoying her master husband’s switch. Soft vibrations erupted inside Nan, tiny pulses teasing her sensitive vaginal tissues and those hidden, taboo nerves in her rectum. Strips of prickling pain spread over her lower back, following without pause across her clenching cheeks from the kiss of leather. She fell into his rhythm as if it were yesterday that they were together instead of almost a year ago.
“So pretty, Nan,” Dan breathed, unleashing the flogger across her butt with more force. “Striped red, your ass squeezing the dildo, your pussy dripping around that toy.”
She shivered on a moan as he upped the ante and struck harder. Prickles turned into a sharper bite the same time the pulsations went up a notch inside her. Heat spread from her back down to her thighs, everywhere he struck the building arousal in her lower body spiraled upward, tightening her nipples and drawing beads of perspiration. Even though she kept her eyes open and pleasure infused her, the blackness started to inch forward as pain and arousal intensified together until she couldn’t differentiate between the two.
“No,” she whispered with an adamant shake of her head. “Don’t come back.”
Just as Nan’s vision grew darker, Master Dan was there, his deep voice in her ear, his handsome, tanned face made more appealing with the waves of thick blond hair brushing his neck filling her vision.
“Stay with me, Nan, right here, where you know you’re safe. Don’t you fucking let him back in.” He increased the vibrations tormenting her lower body, saying, “Concentrate on that, baby, and me, nothing else.”
The order worked, clearing her head as her grit to fight the past returned in full force. She focused on his face, his dark eyes as she issued a demand of her own. “More, Sir. I’m good, I swear.”
“You damn well better be,” Dan warned as he stayed within her sight and snapped the flogger on her tender lower back again.
This time, Nan arched into the strike, embraced the heated pain, relished the sweet increase of arousal as he mixed softer strokes that did nothing more than tease the previous pain back to life with a few more blistering hard swats. Her pussy clamped around the dildo along with her rectum as small contractions gripped the phalluses and a gush of cream soaked the vaginal vibrator. Pleasure grew, blended with the burning pain encompassing her backside. She gyrated with the slow build-up, whimpered as the contractions grew stronger, bringing more pleasure, enough to sweep up to her breasts as the leather seared her tips with a well-aimed snap.
Nan lost her focus as a body-encompassing, mind-numbing climax burst free, the ecstasy obliterating the past months of struggle. Her pussy and ass convulsed around the toys, her pelvis writhing with the onslaught as bright colors lit up the darkness she’d lived with and feared for so long. Master Dan’s choked-up voice breathed into her ear, his words adding another glow to the pleasure already racking her body.
“That’s my girl. I knew you could do it, Nan.”
Recalling his earlier doubt, she would have laughed at that if her mind hadn’t already entered that blissful euphoric stage that left her floating on air. Even with her fuzzy head in the clouds, she recognized there were more hands than Master Dan’s releasing the ropes and cuffs binding her to the cross.
“Why in the blue blazes of fucking hell didn’t she tell us?” Master Devin’s harsh voice sifted through the fog, followed by Master Greg’s calmer tone. “We didn’t know, Dan.”
Nan shook off the guilt, unable to make out Dan’s whispered reply, and then she was floating in his arms, his steady, calming heartbeat under her ear as the room shifted with his measured stride. The next thing she knew, she sat snuggled on his lap, a blanket tucked around her as the room slowly came back into focus.
Master Dan’s deep, satisfied voice rumbled in her ear. “Welcome back. How do you feel?”
Closing her eyes, she concentrated on her body, feeling the lingering stings crisscrossing her cheeks, the burning throb of her nipples, the emptiness of her butt and pussy. “Good.” She laughed and looked up at him. “Real good, Sir.”
“I’m glad. Hold that thought.” Dan inclined his head, and she looked around to see Caden standing there, a frown marring his rough-hewn face as he squatted before her, balancing his large frame on the balls of his booted feet.
Nudging his Stetson back, Nan winced at the censure reflected in his bright blue eyes. “I’m disappointed in you, darlin’. We’ve known each other a long time; you’ve been a valued member here since we opened. Shutting us out after going through such a horrendous time is not acceptable.”
Razor-sharp edged guilt sliced through Nan, and she floundered for an excuse in the face of his displeasure. “I’m sorry. Some of what I was going through had to do with accepting responsibility for…”
“Stop,” Dan and Caden commanded at the same time.
Caden looked at Dan and she felt his nod before the head Master and her long-time friend rebuked her again. “A woman is never to blame when she is abused by a man. You can sass, get physical or use poor judgment, he still has no right to harm you the way you were, no rig
ht to touch you against your will. Understand?”
She didn’t dare say no, and deep down, Nan knew he was right. How many times had Jay said the exact same thing? She used her mistake in misjudging Gerard, in ignoring the few signs that had caused her a moment’s hesitation as an excuse to keep her pain to herself.
“Yes, I think I finally do. Thank you.”
He reached out and squeezed her hand, pushing to his feet and then gripping her chin to tilt her face up. “See that you do.”
“I can’t tell if he’s still pissed or not,” she muttered, watching Master Caden walk away.
“I think he intended to keep you guessing.” A rumble of thunder signaled an incoming storm and she slid off his lap with a sigh of regret. His arms had felt so good around her, his wide chest a comfort to lean against. “I better get going. I don’t like driving at night in the rain.”
Her reluctance to leave him must have been obvious because Dan stood, pulled the blanket off and held out her dress to slip her arms in as he said, “Come home with me. I’m not comfortable leaving you alone tonight, not after what happened last night with your lights, and not after what I put you through tonight.”
“You’ve put me through a lot worse, much more intense scenes,” she reminded him as she tightened the belt at her waist. Without the corset and thong, the soft material brushed against her bare buttocks and breasts, the light touch enough to warm the tender stripes and pucker her nipples again.
“But not under these circumstances.” He flicked a finger on one nipple with a small grin. “Besides, you appear in need of me still. Let’s go, you can follow me.”
Nan wasn’t sure what he meant to do once they got to his place as they never fucked outside of the club, and now that he’d accomplished what he set out to do, brought her to orgasm under his painful administrations, didn’t that mean their bargain had ended? He gave no clue to what he was thinking as he escorted her to the parking lot, not until they entered his house and he tugged her into his bedroom instead of the guestroom.
