by Mel Todd
"Yeah about twice a year, but it never got longer. I just assumed it faded towards the top as that was the least processed part." Now that I said it out loud, it sounded stupid and was one more proof of how I'd been lying to myself the whole time.
"I'd expect it to grow really fast over the next few weeks. Now that you have all that spare energy back, though I am curious as to what your normal offerings were. Who knows?" She shook her head, acting like she was biting her tongue.
I didn't say anything and just walked out of the building with her. The hot humid city air smelled of smog and was so thick it hurt to breathe. I'd never been so glad to feel it hit my face before, but the stinging on my face reminded me I was shackled now. I tried to move my hair to cover it but it was mostly too short, and the heavy balm glued any stray hair to it, making it bug me. I look around and then felt like an idiot.
"Fran, thanks for the offer, but where I need to go is only two blocks away. I'd rather walk."
"You sure? You have a car there?"
"I don't drive. I'll take the bus."
She got a funny look on her face. "Why don't you let me give you a ride to both places. I don't mind."
I looked at her funny. While I wasn't looking forward walking into work after I'd been all but kidnapped, I didn't need the dubious support of someone I barely knew. Heck, I wasn't even sure what her last name was, Calamari? No, that was squid.
"I ride public transportation all the time. I got it. And I could use the alone time to deal with some things. Thanks anyhow."
She crossed her arms, hugging herself. "Okay, but be careful. Being a merlin isn't what you expect."
I gave a laugh that sounded harsher than I had intended, but it felt right. "Being a mage wasn't anything I ever expected. I have no expectations of merlins. Don't worry about it." The only thing I had with me were what was in my pockets. I was starving but I didn't want to be around strangers anymore, especially those who acted nice but had their own plans for me.
I gave her a brusque nod, turned, and headed down the block. As I turned the corner, I caught her staring after me, still with that worried look on her face.
Whatever. Like after all that, I'm supposed to believe she cares about me besides as an example of what else they need to be aware of?
Righteous annoyance fueled the start of my two-block walk. It had mostly faded by the time I reached my destination. The humidity was worse than usual this evening and in my jumpsuit I felt sweat running down my back. I was more than ready for fall to get here. Maybe I could move to Alaska where at least it was not this hot.
The random thoughts distracted me as I pushed open the door to the main area and walked in. I stumbled to a halt as everyone turned and looked at me. Jorge, Lisa, Raul, they were all still there, everyone looking exhausted and worried. Then they saw me.
"Cori! You're back. We were about to call the police for illegal kidnapping," Jorge said as he jumped up and strode to me. He got about five feet from me when I saw, as if in slow motion, his eyes glance to my temple and he froze like someone had just melted his boots to the floor. "Cori, are those tattoos a joke?" His voice thin with emotions I wasn't sure of.
In response, my hand drifted up to my face. They didn't hurt, but they radiated heat and I couldn't help but be very aware of them. "No. It turns out I'm a merlin." This time I didn't bother to disguise my bitterness. "Apparently I'm an anomaly." They hadn't called me that but I could read the subtext of what they’d said. I'd probably end up being the subject of several theses.
Others had joined him. Half of the normal people there, then the next crew that I'd only met in passing. They all stared at my tattoo with odd expressions.
"What type of anomaly?" Lisa asked, her voice distant, and I felt part of my life crumbling around me. All that work to get them to like and respect me, and some ink would ruin it all.
"You know how you don't emerge until after puberty?" I stood in the entryway, their presence forming a barrier between me and my locker, one I wasn't willing to brave. But I needed my keys and my belongings.
They all nodded, still looking at me. Their bodies screamed wariness and worry, I just didn't know what they were worried about.
"Well, I, per them"—a bit of bile might have coated that word—"I emerged right before my twelfth birthday."
The shock was clear on their faces, but Jorge had an unmoved one. "So just like I thought, you're quitting." His voice was a slap of accusation across my face.
I wanted to scream that it wasn't my choice, that I wanted to work in my chosen profession, that I wanted my life back. Instead, I bit the inside of my mouth to stop from letting any of this leak out, and replied, my voice calm. "I don't know. The lead investigator says he requires my help as I'm the only Spirit merlin on the east coast. I don't know what help I'll be but from everything they've said I don't have a choice. And no matter what, I'll have to go back to college. They say I've learned way too many bad habits. I'm hoping I can stay here until then. I'll try."
As I said the words, I decided I would. This could count towards my draft, right? Part of working with the city? I'd worked so hard for this and feeling it slip out of my fingers like grains of hourglass time sliced at me.
"Don't bother. I knew you'd leave." He turned and headed towards the door. "I'm off. See you in two." He didn't look back as he slammed the door behind him. The others shifted uncomfortably but they filtered away, leaving only Lisa looking at me with sharp eyes.
"Not what you wanted?"
"No," I growled the word. Why did everyone think being a mage was what I wanted? I had no desire to serve for a decade or to get a degree in something I had no interest in - to not be able to help people. It chafed at my soul.
"I get that. Had a cousin who emerged. Just a wizard, but he wasn't happy. He had wanted to continue his parents' business as a plumber but they made him do his service in the Army." Her eyes were bleak. "He didn't come back."
That threw cold water on my attitude. "I'm sorry."
"So am I. Good luck." She turned and walked away, leaving me standing there in what, once again, felt like enemy territory.
Chapter 17
Rage against the OMO, for they create chains to limit humanity to what it thinks you should be. Rage and fight, Ronin forever. ~ Underground Mages Forever
Acting on a hunch that I hated, I cleaned out my locker. I'd fight to come back but part of me suspected I wouldn't be welcome and that I wouldn't win. But that didn't mean I couldn't try. Packing everything in my bag, I walked the block to the bus stop. A buzz in my pocket jolted me out of my haze.
*Yo - Cor where are you? Got home late after library. You aren't here. Everything cool?*
Oh Jo-jo, how the hell am I going to explain this to you?
I didn't even address the worry about her bailing or being unable to handle the next step in Catastrophe Cori.
*Crazy day. Headed back now. Talk when home?*
Her response was immediate, which helped a bit.
*K. Need food? I forgot to eat. I hate history.*
*Yes, please. Starved, haven't eaten since bfast*
*Ugh, not good. You know that. Am cooking now. Everything nachos?*
My mouth watered at that. Everything meant beef, mushrooms, black refried beans, cheese, sour cream, and salsa. Sounded like the solution to my abused taste buds and empty hole in my stomach.
*Yes!*
*lol - see you at home.*
I slid my phone away and my smiled faded. I could only hope she'd be as cool with my appearance as she was with my long absence. The bus pulled up and I dug out my pass. The bored driver glanced at me as I tapped my Breeze card to the little machine. He blanched as his eyes latched onto my temple and he swallowed, watching me walk back.
What in the world? Ugh, I don't need that today.
I moved through the bus but made sure I sat down in an empty row behind the driver, mostly to avoid his wide-eyed stare.
Yeesh, you'd think he'd never seen a mag
e before.
I stared out the windows, trying to figure out how I had ended up here. The day had been a blur and it didn't make sense to me that I had started the day as a no one and found myself a merlin at the end. It didn't fit into my worldview and that threw me off balance even more.
"Hey, lady you got change to sp—" The aggressive, whiny words cut off as I turned to look at the speaker. Young, scrawny, with a tough guy look and a cap on backwards covering his dirty blond hair, but nothing disguised the look of fear as his eyes snagged on my tattoos. "Sorry, ma'am, didn't mean to bother you," he babbled, backing up and pulling the stop requested cord.
Others on the bus, not that it was packed with riders but still a Friday night meant it wasn't empty, started to turn and look at me. Their eyes went wide as they saw the rawness of the tattoo and it felt like a physical reaction as they pulled back from me. I saw at least two get up and dive out the door with the thug as soon as the bus stopped. I realized the driver keep nervously glancing up at me.
I just want to go home.
I inhaled sharply through my mouth, fighting back tears of exhaustion and emotional overload.
I've survived everything else, I will survive this too. I will not break.
A few deep breaths and I felt calmer. Everyone gave me a wide birth, and I didn't care, counting the stops. Part of me wanted to get off earlier to avoid the looks and the low level of panic in the bus. I'd kinda thought Shay was weird, but I'd never feared him. What was their issue? I just shook my head and glanced around. People avoided my gaze and ducked their heads, but I realized as I looked around I didn't see any mages.
Blinking, I thought back about all my bus rides both here and in Rockway. Other than Shay that one time, and he usually kept a cap on, I couldn't remember seeing very many mages. Maybe one or two the entire time, and they, too, had worn caps. That surprised me, and I looked again. Tattooed mages were a smaller percent of the population, but surely they weren't that rare or that well off.
But I didn't see any. I also refused to get off to avoid the stares, though I thought about it. Bottom line, I was too exhausted to walk another few blocks just because my presence made them uncomfortable, but I realized how oblivious I had been. Kadia's comments sank in further now than they had.
Great, so I'm biased on top of everything else.
I scrubbed my face with my hands and winced as I hit the fresh tattoo, smearing goop everywhere. I sighed and tried to smooth the goo back over the abused skin. Getting an infection was the last thing I needed. I pulled on the next stop and I swear the driver had the doors open before he even stopped. With a shake of my head I got out and felt the doors snap closed behind me abnormally fast. I glanced back as the bus actually burned rubber getting away from me.
Oh, good grief. What? Like I'll melt them in their seats? People are idiots.
I headed up the way to the apartment, glad for the darkness that had finally fallen. It made it easier to avoid people. With it being mostly students and the weekend, there were people everywhere, but I just kept my head down and walked the stairs to the apartment, my beacon of hope.
I paused outside the door, worried and stressed. I don't know how long I would have stood there if I hadn't heard another door unlock and start to open. Nathan was the last person I wanted to deal with tonight. With speed born of avoidance, I unlocked the door and stepped in, shutting it firmly behind me.
"Finally!" Jo all but shouted, springing from the couch, textbook in hand. "I was waiting for you. I got the nachos ready to go and I thought we could rent that new movie. It's supposed to be great. Also, I wanted to ask about Dragonworl—" She stopped, looking at me.
I knew she couldn't see the tattoos, I stood with my right side to the door not looking at her.
"Cor? What's wrong? Did something happen?" She set down her book and moved towards me. "Cori? What happened?" All humor and excitement had faded from her voice. Now worry replaced it as she moved close. "Cori, look at me."
She's your best friend, she's never going to leave you. Get over this stupid fear.
With that sharp reminder to myself, I dropped my bag, ignoring the thunk as it hit the floor, and turned to face her.
Jo sucked in a sharp breath and moved towards me. Her hand reached up and ghosted over the tattoos, not touching me but I could feel the heat from her skin. "Cori?" Her voice held so many questions that I didn't know the answers to.
"I guess I should have gotten tested when you suggested," I managed before Jo pulled me into a hug and I lost it. All the confusion, the horrible bodies, the way people treated me like a criminal, then like an interesting specimen, feeling all my dreams die, then that horrid, horrid ball! It all came out and I bawled there in her arms on our entry floor.
I don't know how long I cried. At some point we moved to the couch, and she got up to get me water and Kleenex. She gave me time to weep and held me or let me go as I needed, no talking, just being there while I let it all get out of my system. But finally, my tears dried up, and I felt more than a bit stupid.
"I texted Mami. She'll be here soon."
"What?" I couldn't stop the protestation that burst out. "No."
"Cori, hush. I'll lay money she walks in any moment laden with food and more than willing to talk to you." Jo paused and swallowed. "We talked a lot the day after I emerged. You'll see. She has a way of putting everything in perspective."
"But, that's mom stuff. She's not my mom, she shouldn't have to –" I bit off the words as Jo glared at me.
"It is also Tia stuff, and she is your Tia by love. So deal. You have a family that cares, and nothing you do, or are, will chase us away." She paused and gave me a long considering look. "But if you steal my girlfriend, we'll have serious words."
I blinked at her, the non sequitur derailing me. "You have a girlfriend?" Maybe I had missed something? Was she dating someone? I scrambled through my memories trying to figure out if I'd forgotten something.
Jo burst out in laughter. "No. But when I do, if you ever steal her, I'll be very pissed at you." Her smile made me groan. She'd pulled me out of my mope expertly.
"I'm pretty sure I can guarantee I won't steal your girlfriend. But if I do, I'll let you be the best man at our wedding."
"Ouch. Burn. Wench." She was laughing as she got up. "Where is the jar of goop they gave you? You're wincing, which means you're hurting. Then when Mami gets here, you can tell us everything." She pulled two Cokes out of the fridge and handed one to me as a rap sounded on the door. How a rap could sound imperious and worried, I didn't know. But it did. "There's Mami."
Jo answered the door and Marisol stood there. "You said you two needed me. I'm here, what's wrong?"
I stood, still shaky from emotions and stress, facing her. "Hi, Tia."
"Oh my," the words a soft gasp. She came over and lay her hand on my left cheek. "Mia hija, it looks like you have much to tell us."
"Yes, she does, and I haven't heard any of it yet. Let me take your stuff and we can eat while you talk. I'm starving."
Her saying those words made me realize that was probably half of my issue. I hadn't eaten since that morning. Jo set the table: all the fixings for nachos had been ready to go. We sat down and with their loving eyes on me I started with the bodies and I didn't avoid any of it. Not the Murphy's Curse, the Lady Luck cloak, the ball, the tattoos, those people’s weird reactions to me, and especially when they thought I had emerged.
"That does explain much," Marisol said leaning back. She'd only nibbled on chips as Jo and I ate. "But there are bright sides to this."
I gave her a bleak look. "Not everyone wants to go to college. You know they'll want me to get a doctorate. I don't even know what I want to study. And I'm in the draft now."
Jo reached out, putting her hand on mine. "Hey, it's not so bad. And you like school way better than I ever did."
"True, but still, I don't start until January and they are going to drive me to major in certain things. I don't know what I want." I did
n't manage to keep the whine out of my voice, and I sagged a bit. "Sorry. I'm being selfish."
"Of course, you are. It's your life, you're allowed to be selfish about it. All you can do with life is take what has happened and deal with it. But as for things about this that are good?" She paused and gave me a grin that had me worried. "Now you can properly learn to cook since disasters won't keep happening, and maybe you can get a car. A lot of your valid fear was apparently due to these cloaks. Now you can step out and do more stuff."
"Oh," I said, stunned. I hadn't even thought of those things. I ran through a few other little things that had not occurred to me. Maybe now I could find out why Stevie had died. I could become anything.
"And," she said mildly, interrupting my thoughts. "I get to get you an emergence gift." Jo and she exchanged smiles and once again I thought running might have been the better option.
"Fine. Then I want this." I pulled out the amulet with the spirit symbol on it. "Can you get me a real necklace? One that won't tarnish and wear out? Something I'd be proud of?"
Jo took it from me, looking at me, then it. I could see emotions and thoughts running across her face, but they were so fast I couldn't figure them out. "Deal. But might take me a while. Okay?"
I froze, horrified. "Jo - I never got you anything."
She leaned over and kissed the middle of my forehead. "I know. You were so wrapped up in everything that you didn't even think about it. Being my friend is all that matters, Cori."
Shame flushed through me and I vowed to find her the best gift ever. No matter what it took.
Chapter 18
The spells that mages can do are well defined and well researched. Those few who dare to reach beyond are either specialty researchers for the OMO or shortly very dead. ~ Magic Explained
That night I slept deeper than I could ever remember sleeping. No dreams haunted me. When my alarm went off at six, I lay there disoriented and tried to remember why I was getting up. Then everything flooded back into me and I jerked upright, feeling my pulse hammering. But nothing fell, nothing broke, the power didn't go out, nothing.
