by TJ Klune
“Hey, Nicky,” Jazz said, smiling sweetly. Nick could have kissed her. But he wouldn’t, given that her girlfriend was standing right next to her, actively avoiding looking at Nick. “We tried to call but got your voicemail. Hope it’s okay we’re here.”
Nick jumped up. “Oh, sure. You have no idea how happy I am to see you. In fact, let’s go somewhere else so I can tell you exactly how happy I am.”
“Don’t go too far,” Mary told him. “We don’t know how long your dad will stay awake by the time he gets back.”
Nick nodded, smiling tightly as he grabbed Jazz and Gibby by the hands, pulling them down the hall. He could feel Cap’s gaze boring into his back, but he couldn’t do anything about that now. If he were lucky, maybe Cap would be gone by the time he got back. Or, at the very least, distracted by Dad.
“Your dad’s awake?” Jazz asked, squeezing his hand. “Nick, that’s so great! Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Phone’s dead,” Nick said through gritted teeth. “It’s been a long day. Hasn’t it, Gibby?”
Gibby said, “Yeah, that’s putting it mildly.”
* * *
Nick led them down the stairs to the second floor and back to the room where he hid when he’d first arrived at the hospital. The table with the penis drawn underneath it was still there, and Nick pulled Gibby and Jazz inside before shutting the door behind them.
“Is this our official hospital hangout spot?” Jazz asked. “I like that we have that.”
“Where’s Seth?” Nick demanded.
Jazz looked confused. “I don’t … know? He wasn’t in school again today.” She looked between Nick and Gibby. “Why? What’s going on?”
Gibby stared down at the floor.
That pissed Nick off. “Well? Care to explain?”
Gibby looked up. Her darkened eyes were bloodshot, like she hadn’t gotten much sleep. Which, given that she’d been in Seth’s ear the night before, made sense. “Look, Nick. If we could … wait. Okay?” She jerked her head toward Jazz. “Now might not be the right time.”
She had a point. Jazz was oblivious to everything, and it was probably best to keep her that way. It didn’t stop him from glaring daggers at Gibby.
“What’s going on?” Jazz asked. “Why are you guys staring at each other like that?”
“It’s nothing,” Nick growled. “Just a frank exchange of ideas and questioning certain choices that were made.”
“Maybe certain choices were made by people other than me,” Gibby snapped. “Choices that I didn’t agree with but had to respect anyway.”
Nick scoffed. “Oh, I’m sure you fought so hard against those choices.”
“I did! I told them you should know!”
“You could have told me!”
“It wasn’t my secret to tell!”
“Maybe if you’d grown some balls, you could have—”
“Oh, you want to talk about balls, Nick? How about actually having some when it comes to Seth and—”
“Are you guys talking about how Seth and Owen are Pyro Storm and Shadow Star?” Jazz asked.
“Yes,” Nick and Gibby snapped at the same time. It took a moment for it to sink in what she’d said. They both turned to gape at her.
Jazz nodded. “It makes sense now. Carry on.”
Nick and Gibby breathed as one as Jazz smoothed out her cheerleader uniform like she hadn’t just stunned them completely.
Nick recovered first. “How the hell did you know?”
Jazz rolled her eyes. “I figured it out a long time ago. I thought it was something we didn’t talk about. I mean, come on. It was obvious.”
Nick was incredulous. “It was?”
Jazz shrugged. “Every time there was a big fight between Shadow Star and Pyro Storm, Owen and Seth would be absent or late the next day. Or they’d show up with weird bruises. And then you dated Owen, who was most likely doing it to get a rise out of Seth, and not just because Seth already had feelings for you. It probably didn’t help that Seth started being Pyro Storm shortly after your mom passed away, and then Owen tried to make it all about him by turning into Shadow Star. I mean, I get it. I would be upset too if I tried to do something to keep my friends and the city safe, and then this other Extraordinary comes out of nowhere and takes all the credit and then manages to infiltrate our friend group.” Jazz’s brow furrowed. “And then Rebecca Firestone gets involved and gives all the press to Owen and makes him look like the hero, even though it was really Seth doing most of the work.”
Nick’s mind was blown. “Holy crap.”
“I want to make out with you so hard right now,” Gibby said rather aggressively.
Jazz looked pleased with herself. “Did I really figure it out before either of you? Wow. I’m wonderful.”
“This is literally the stupidest day of my life,” Nick lamented to no one in particular.
“Oh, I don’t know,” Jazz said. “Remember when you jumped into the river wearing—”
“Yes, Jazz. I remember that because it only happened a few days ago! Can we please get back to the fact that everyone knew Owen and Seth were Extraordinaries before I did? I’m the one who stalked them! And how is it that I—oh my god, would you stop sticking your tongue down her throat! I’m young and queer and in a fragile place right now. I don’t need to see that!”
Gibby pulled off of Jazz’s lips with a wet smack that would most likely haunt Nick’s dreams for the rest of his days. “She’s amazing.”
Nick rolled his eyes. “Yes, fine, Jazz, you’re beautiful and smart, and I’m so annoyed that you figured it out before me.”
“It’s okay, Nicky,” Jazz said, pulling out a compact from her backpack. She puckered her lips in her reflection, fixing her smudged lipstick. “Not all of us are capable of seeing what’s clearly right in front of us.”
“I feel like you’re insulting me.”
She pursed her lips as she folded the compact and stowed it away. “I wouldn’t dream of it. But now that we’re all in the know, what are we going to do about it?”
Gibby nodded. “We should—”
“Do nothing,” Nick said.
Jazz blinked. “What’s that now?”
“We should do nothing,” Nick repeated. “It has nothing to do with us.”
“Seth’s our friend,” Gibby said. “And he’s more than that to you, whether you realize it or not. He needs us, Nick.”
“Oh, does he? Funny. Because if he needed us, he would have told us the truth a long time ago.”
“That’s not fair—”
Nick groaned into his hands. “Fair? You want to talk about fair? My dad—the only parent I have left—was put in the hospital because of what they did. He somehow got in the middle of a fight he wouldn’t have been involved in had they not been trying to kill each other. He got hurt because of them. He could’ve died.”
“That wasn’t Seth’s fault,” Gibby said weakly. “He was trying to do everything he could to stop Owen before people got hurt.”
Nick shook his head as he dropped his hands. “Obviously he didn’t do enough. If—” He swallowed thickly. “If it’d been worse, what then? What if … what if my dad had died? Would you still say he did everything he could? He sat across from Owen. Almost daily. Seth knew who Owen was, and yet he did nothing to stop it. That’s not what heroes do. And Seth is no hero. He’s a coward. And don’t even get me started on Owen. He’s … there’re pills and…”
Gibby took a step toward him, hands balled into fists at her sides. “Seth only did this because of you! Everything he is, an Extraordinary, Pyro Storm, is because of you!”
Nick’s knees felt wobbly. “What the hell are you talking about? He didn’t—”
“Your mom died,” Gibby spat. “And it sucked, Nick. For us because we didn’t know how to help you, but more for you and your dad, okay? Both of you were so lost in your grief, and it tore at all of us. And Seth made a choice. You forget, I think, that the same thing happened to him. Befor
e, he was only Seth Gray, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. But After, he promised himself he would do everything he could to make sure you never had to go through that again. He always … since he was little.” She sighed. “It was the train accident, Nick. It changed him into something else or activated something already in him. But he always felt guilty about it. That he was given a gift at such a high cost. He never wanted anything to do with it. Not until after your mom died. He saw what it did to you. He loved you so much that he put on a mask to keep Nova City safe. To keep your father safe. To keep you safe.”
Nick ground his teeth together. “Which means he lied. All this time, he lied to me. He kept this from me. Kept all of it—”
Gibby’s head snapped up. Her eyes were blazing. “Maybe if you weren’t so self-centered, you could’ve figured it out on your own. Like I did. Like Jazz did. Jazz finds out, and she protects his secret. I find out and do all I can to help him. And what do you do when you find out? You bitch and moan about what it does to you.”
“That’s not fair! My dad is—”
“Your dad got hurt, and that’s awful. But that wasn’t Seth’s fault. It was Owen’s. It was a trap for Seth. Don’t you get that? Owen was trying to kill Seth, Nick. Your dad was collateral damage.”
“I don’t care. It’s on both of them.”
Gibby looked away. “I can’t believe…” She shook her head. “Whatever. You do what you want, Nick. You always do. I’m going to go help my friend because he needs me.”
She turned and pushed the door open. It fell shut behind her.
“Huh,” Jazz said, staring at the door. “That didn’t go like I thought it would.”
“Of course it didn’t,” Nick groused. “That’s what happens when people lie to each other.”
“Huh,” Jazz said again. Then, “Are you going to yell at me now? If you are, I’d like to know in advance so I can cry to make you feel better.”
Nick deflated. “No. I want to go back to my dad and forget all of this.”
“That’s going to be hard to do. Forgetting. Seems pointless.”
“I can do it.”
Jazz sighed. “I think you believe that. Can I tell you something?”
“Are you going to apologize?”
“I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“You … you knew about—ugh.” Damn her for being right.
“That’s what I thought. I worry a lot about what happens when Gibby leaves. You know. Graduates. While we stay here.”
Nick struggled to keep his annoyance down. “I think there’s bigger issues we need to—”
“I thought she’d go to college. Maybe move on to bigger and better things. Leave us all behind. Leave me behind. We’d break up, and maybe we’d stay friends who talked to each other every now and then, or maybe we wouldn’t. I mean, it’s not exactly realistic that you meet the love of your life when you’re sixteen, right? And besides, we’re young. People think we don’t know what we’re talking about. That our feelings aren’t valid. I thought about it a lot. All the time, really. It hurt. But you know what I realized?”
“No, but you’re going to tell me anyway.”
She laughed. “I am. I realized that it’s okay to have doubts. That I’m a person, and I have a right to feel the way I do, and so does she. If something happens down the road, it won’t make anything I’m feeling now any less important. I care about her a great deal. It boils down to trust, I think. And faith. I lost my way a little bit. I forgot to believe in her and myself. So I told her about it. And you know what she said to me?”
Nick shook his head.
“She said that I was stupid. That she loved me, and that even if something happened in the future, it would never change this exact moment.” Jazz smiled. “It’s good to talk about how you’re feeling. But it’s even better to fight for the things you believe in. I’m fighting for her because I know she’s fighting for me. Who’s fighting for you, Nicky?”
Nick couldn’t speak.
Jazz leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Sometimes, the people we want to protect the most might not understand why we do the things we do. But that doesn’t mean they love us any less. Only you can decide where your faith lies. We’re glad your dad’s okay. Call us if you need anything. Day or night. We’ll always come running.”
She left him standing next to the penis table.
* * *
Mary and Cap were gone by the time he went back to the fifth floor. A woman at the nurse’s station said they went to grab a bite to eat and would bring him something when they returned.
His dad was back in his room, but he wasn’t alone.
There was a woman sitting in a chair next to the bed, cradling a child in one arm, her other hand grasping one of Dad’s.
Nick hesitated in the doorway. They didn’t know he was there. He thought about speaking up, but then he heard the quiet sob coming from the woman.
“It’s okay,” Dad whispered, squeezing her hand. “It’s okay.”
“You save us,” the woman said, her accent thick. “You save me. Aleksey.” She muttered something in a language Nick didn’t recognize. Then, “Why? Why you help?”
“Because it was the right thing to do,” Dad said gruffly.
“Not everyone helps,” the woman said, pulling her hand away as the baby started to fuss. “You did.”
Dad shook his head. “Lady, it was my job—”
“Guardian,” she insisted. “Guardian angel.”
Dad flinched. Nick didn’t know why, but Dad recovered quickly. “Can you do me a favor?”
She nodded. “Anything. Anything for you.”
“I’m going to ask the hospital to help you. I don’t want to see you back out on the streets, okay? There are shelters that can help women in your position. People who will take care of you and your kid until you can get on your feet. This is a chance for you.”
“They take Aleksey from me?”
“Are you a good mother?”
“I try.”
“Then I don’t think they will. But you have to let them help you. Can you do that for me?”
“Yes. For guardian, I do.”
Nick felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked behind him. A nurse he didn’t recognize smiled at him, motioning that she needed to get by. He stepped aside. “Okay, Edyta. Mr. Bell needs his rest, just like you and Aleksey. Let’s get you back to your room, okay?”
The woman rose slowly, but not before she leaned forward and kissed the back of Dad’s hand. The nurse put an arm on her shoulders and led her from the room. The woman’s face was tear-streaked, but her eyes were bright, and she cooed down at her baby. She didn’t see Nick at all.
He watched as they walked down the hall before they rounded a corner.
He turned back to the room.
His dad was watching him, a small smile on his face. He looked tired.
“Got yourself a fan,” Nick said quietly as he walked into the room, sitting in the chair by the bed. “Seems like she has stars in her eyes.”
Dad snorted. “She’s had it rough. Not used to being treated like a person. Hopefully that changes.”
“How’s your brain?”
“Mostly intact. Maybe only a little scrambled.”
Nick nodded and looked away. He blinked rapidly.
“Hey, hey. Kid, come on. Nicky. Look at me.”
Nick couldn’t. At least not until he heard Dad trying to lift himself up out of the bed. He stood quickly, the chair scraping the floor behind him. Dad was grimacing, a trickle of sweat on his forehead. Nick scowled at him, carefully pressing on his shoulders. “Don’t make me call the nurse in here. And I’ll tell Cap when he gets back.”
Dad glared at him. “You wouldn’t dare.”
“Try me.”
Once he was sure Dad wasn’t going to try and get up again, Nick started to turn back toward the chair. He was stopped by fingers circling his wrist and holding on tightly. His gaze followed the hand to a bandaged ar
m up to his father’s face. Dad was frowning. “I’m going to be all right, kid.”
Nick gave a little shrug. He didn’t know how to put into words how relieved that made him, or how scared he’d been, and still was.
“We need to talk, Nicky. About some of the stuff you said. About some of the things I said.”
“You’re not supposed to be talking at all,” Nick said hoarsely. “Remember?”
“I know. Just … let me get this out, and then I promise I’ll shut up.”
“Unlikely.”
“Nick.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
Dad squeezed his wrist. “I said some things I shouldn’t have. Things I can’t take back, but wish I could more than anything. You didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I know I’m—”
“No, it’s not okay.” He started coughing. Nick was alarmed until Dad motioned to a cup with a straw sitting on a small table next to the bed. Nick grabbed it, and Dad sucked down the water. He coughed twice more before subsiding. “Shit, that hurt.”
“Then maybe you shouldn’t talk—”
“I love you,” Dad said fiercely. “More than anything in this world. And I’m so damn proud of you and the man you’ve become. After everything we’ve been through, you had every right to curl up and let go. But you pushed yourself, and you pushed me. We survived, Nicky. I know some days it doesn’t feel like it, but we have. And we’re getting better. We’re still going to make mistakes. I know I will. But as long as you remember there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you, we’re going to be okay.”
Nick could barely breathe. “I thought … when you said that—when you asked me why I had to be this way … that you…”
Dad squeezed his eyes shut. “I know. I never should have said that. It wasn’t fair to you.”
Nick shuddered. “But you were right.”
Dad shook his head. “No. Never. Never that.”
“I was trying to be something I couldn’t, trying to change myself to make—”
Dad opened his eyes. “I don’t want you to change. All I ever want is for you to be healthy and whole and talk a mile a minute because your voice makes me happy—”
