by KB Winters
Jameson: Maddie call me back.
I sighed when the phone buzzed against my thigh, looked at the screen and shook my head. I needed to make this decision on my own. If I was gonna have this kid, it would be because I wanted him or her, because I was ready for the struggle of single motherhood, not because I had some fantasy that I’d get my own happy ending.
Jameson: Maddie, please. We need to talk about this.
“Talk,” I shouted at the screen, “yeah right.” Jamie didn’t want to talk, he wanted to convince me, to persuade me, to promise me that we were a team, that we could do this together. He wanted to give me a false sense of security until it was too late for me to back out, and I wasn’t having it.
Hell no, I wasn’t.
Jameson: We’re not done with this conversation.
No, we weren’t. But there would be no conversation until I had time to think, to figure out what I would do.
I sighed and looked around my bedroom. It was lavish with Egyptian cotton sheets and a duvet that was the softest thing that had ever touched my skin, but the room was basically an empty vessel. There were no personal touches, no photos or little knickknacks decorating the room. It was, in effect, a nice hotel room.
This was not the room of a woman ready to bring a kid into the world.
Moments like this made me wish I made more of an effort to make friends. I hadn’t planned on being in Glitz this long, not that I had friends in California, either, but right now I could use a real friend.
And I didn’t mean Jamie.
There was Maisie. I could talk to her and she would squeal with excitement for the idea of another baby, but she would also tell me to keep the baby and raise it on my own. She would go in hard on the girl power thing, encouraging me until I foolishly believed having this baby was the right choice when I knew it wasn’t.
“Nope.” I shook my head again, feeling my determination rise. “I didn’t need to talk to anyone about this decision because it was mine. Only mine. I would make this decision the same as nearly every other decision I made in my life, on my own.
I cried myself to sleep, sad to say goodbye to someone who was never even here. I woke up the next day perfectly settled with my decision. I made an appointment at the clinic first thing, and then I took the longest, hottest shower of my life.
I would take care of this on my own. I was going to terminate my pregnancy, and I wouldn’t tell anyone.
Talk about fucking my life up without even trying.
Suddenly, I had a lot more sympathy for my mom.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Jameson
After three hours of fitful sleep, I woke up exhausted. Pregnant. Madison was fucking pregnant, which wasn’t as bad a thing to me as it was to her, but the fact that she needed to figure out what she wanted to do, made me sad. I knew what those words meant, and I didn’t like it.
A baby changed everything, and we needed to talk. We needed to sit down like adults and talk about this baby. Talk about the pregnancy and figure out—together—what we would do. I was in love with her, and I knew she was thinking about aborting our baby.
Jameson: Maddie, call me.
I shot that text off to her and hopped in the shower before I was late for work. Agent Beck would be up my ass all day if I showed up late, and I was in no mood for her shit. Not today. I would find a way to make it through my shift today, and then I’d go straight to Maddie because we had to talk.
For now, I had to keep my head in the police game and see what progress I could make on this double homicide. Entering the precinct, the sounds of the phones ringing, the scent of stale coffee and perfume, helped settle my shit a little. I settled into my desk and started going through the files on my desk to see if there were any unsolved murders with the same firearm. I didn’t think we’d find those guns, ever, but if the case should somehow make it to a courtroom, I’d have to prove that I did the leg work.
“You’re off this investigation.” Agent Beck stood in front of my desk holding a stack of files, with an arrogant smile on her freckled face. “You’re not as helpful as I thought you’d be.”
“I’m not in the mood for your shit today, Beck.” She could stand there as arrogant as she wanted, but I wasn’t going anywhere.
“You’re off the case, Ellison, so you don’t have to deal with my shit today or any other day. Have a nice life.” She took a step away from the desk, practically bouncing away when my words stopped her in her fucking tracks.
“I’m not off this case until it’s been resolved.” I did too much work on this case to let this bitch screw it up for me now.
“Yeah? How do you think that’s going to work, rookie?”
“Easy,” I told her and leaned back in my chair, arms folded over my chest. “You kick me off this investigation, and my next stop is to the ADIC to let him know about your conflict of interest in this case. A conflict that could lead to a very fucking embarrassing wrongful conviction.”
Beck leaned forward, another cocky smile lighting up her face. “If you go to the ADIC to make accusations, you’ll need proof.”
I laughed. “You willing to bet this career-making case that I don’t have receipts?” I had Beau digging into Beck’s past because right now all I had was suspicions and theories, but if anyone could find what I needed, it was Beau.
Or I could take up the offer from Jasper Ashby and get Calvin on her case. He was a damn good hacker. And the reason why the FBI hadn’t been able to crack their security. Or, if I really wanted to get down and dirty, Jag and Vivi were just a phone call away.
I smiled. This bitch had no idea who could back me.
Beck watched me carefully, trying hard to see past my steely gray eyes and pompous grin, but she didn’t get anything. “Really?”
“Yeah, really.”
“You really want to go there?” she asked.
“Yep.” Big smile. I enjoyed this more than I thought I would.
“Fine,” she growled. “You can stay on the case.”
“I know I can.”
Her blue gaze narrowed and after a few seconds, her shoulders relaxed in resignation. “Whatever. I’m trying to track down one of the Black Jacks, Dealio. Wanna come?”
I shook my head because that was a pointless errand. I couldn’t tell her that Savannah had sold his ass to one of the cartels.
“Nope. I’m doing some background on Mueller. Now that we know the truth, there are probably dozens of trafficked girls who have family and any number of them could have gone after him.”
Surprise flashed in her eyes. “Smart. Let me know if you get a lead.”
“Will do.” I saluted her and flashed a teasing grin. “Be careful with the Black Jacks; they don’t do well with powerful women.”
“Thanks for the tip but that’s what backup weapons are for.” With a devious smile, she walked away, and I got back to my own work.
Getting lost in the details of gun calibers, grooves and spiraling was a solid distraction from my personal life, but all day, Maddie’s words replayed in my head. I couldn’t even believe she thought I’d walk away from her or our baby. Didn’t she realize I couldn’t walk away?
If she didn’t, I would damn well show her.
As soon as my shift was over, I headed straight over to Ashby Manor. She could hide from me over the phone, ignore me, and ignore the talk we needed to have. If I just showed up, however, she’d have no choice. She’d have to talk to me.
The door opened to reveal Thomas, the well-dressed man that no one, not even law enforcement, was quite sure what he did for the Ashby family, and for Sadie Ashby in particular. “Mr. Ellison, how may I help you?”
“I’m looking for Madison. Is she around?”
Thomas nodded and took a few steps back. “She’s up in her room. Is she expecting you?”
“No. But she’ll see me.”
“Of course. I’ll let her know you’re here.” He disappeared into a small room and returned a few seconds later wit
h a tight smile. “She doesn’t want any visitors.”
I couldn’t accept that. “She’s being emotional. She’ll see me; just show me to her room.”
Thomas looked unsure, and I didn’t blame him. His loyalty was to the Ashby’s, and not someone he perceived as there to fuck up their peace.
“If she refuses to see me, I’ll leave.”
“I know,” he said simply and nodded for me to follow him up a wide, slightly winding staircase and down a long, dimly lit hall.
“I’ll wait here.”
The last fucking thing I wanted was an audience, but Maddie was emotional, which meant nothing was easy. I knocked gently and waited for an answer, but none came.
“Maddie, it’s me. Open the door.”
I heard the sniffles first. “I told Thomas to tell you to go away. I don’t want to talk, Jamie.”
“Yeah, well you’ve had more than a day to figure your shit out, Maddie. You’re done shutting me out. Open the damn door.”
“No.”
“Don’t make me break this fucking door down, Madds. I don’t want any beef with these people, but if you don’t open this door, I will.”
Movement sounded on the other side of the door, and I figured it was just as likely that she would open the door as it was that she might shimmy down the side of the house. But a full minute later, the bedroom door opened, and Maddie appeared with tear-stained cheeks, red eyes, dressed in farting unicorn pajamas.
“Happy?”
“Ecstatic,” I shot back, my tone thick with sarcasm. I cast a look over my shoulder at Thomas, who nodded and gave us privacy. “Talk to me, Madds.”
She stepped away from my touch, her watery eyes looking at me with uncertainty. “What’s there to say? I’m gonna be a fat and ugly broke ass single mother.”
“Single? What the fuck are you thinking?” I pulled her into my arms until she came willingly and leaned against me. I kissed the top of her head.
“I love you Maddie. I fucking love you. Do you see these shoulders? They’re big enough to carry everything that comes our way.”
She let out a watery laugh and shook her head. “That’s a mighty big promise, Jamie.”
“I don’t make promises unless I know I can keep them. You and me and our baby? I promise to always be there, to always protect you and to always love you with everything I’ve got.”
I cupped her sweet face so she was staring into my eyes, seeing the truth of my words.
Maddie leaned against my hand and let out a sigh that spoke of all her torn emotions.
“I love you too, Jamie. But I’m scared. I don’t want you here just because you knocked me up.”
“I’m here because I love you, and I knocked you up. I’ve always wanted you, Maddie. Even last week when I let you walk away thinking I didn’t, I wanted you. Now though? Now I’m never letting you go. You’re mine.”
“Yours? You gonna put a ring on it?” There it was. A glimmer of the saucy smartass I loved so much.
“Damn straight.” I pressed against her and kissed her lips, slowly, letting the fire build naturally, and in seconds, we were inferno hot.
“Now grab some clothes and come home with me, unless you want the whole Ashby family to hear me fuck you how you need to be fucked right now.”
She sucked in a breath of shock and surprise flashed in her honey-brown eyes as her lips pulled into a slow, sexy smile. “Five minutes.”
“I’ll give you three,” I growled.
She smiled and started to pack.
“Don’t think this is an easy way to get me to move in with you, Jameson.”
Inside my condo, Maddie turned to me with a serious expression on her face. “This is a temporary stay while I get my head on straight.”
“If you say so.” Now that I had her at my place and she was having my baby, I would damn well get her to stay. I set her bags down in the middle of the floor and pulled her to me. “You can think it’s temporary but my plan is to make it forever.”
“Jamie,” she sighed. “It’s too soon for us to live together. And I’m still mad at you.”
I traced my thumb across her delicate collarbone. “I’m sure I could convince you to forgive me.”
She sucked in a breath, and her eyes fluttered closed. “You could do me right now, but that won’t change my mind.”
“I guess we’ll have to see about that.” I cupped her face with one hand and captured her mouth, kissing her long and slow until her breath hitched. Until I could feel the little pulse flutter under my thumb. I kissed her so slow, she let out a moan of frustration.
“So eager.”
“Horny, Jamie. So fucking horny.”
“I love it when you growl at me.” I pulled her close, gripping her ass in my hands. “Gets me so fucking hard.”
I lifted her in my arms, settling my cock right between her hot, pajama-covered thighs while I kissed her until she was breathless and squirming in my arms.
Maddie tore her mouth from mine with another cock-hardening growl. “Feeling you so hard gets me wet, Jamie. So fucking wet. I need you.”
“I love you,” I muttered before I took her mouth again, kissing her and rubbing my cock between her thighs until she vibrated in my arms and I had to swallow one of her moans of pleasure.
“I love you too, but if we don’t get naked soon, I might have to hurt you.”
I took a step back and let her body slide down the length of mine.
“Can’t have that, can we?”
“No, we can’t.” Maddie’s fingers were already working on the buttons of her pajama top when I stopped them.
“What?”
“Me first.” She blinked in confusion and then smiled when she realized what I was saying.
Her fingers worked quickly to unleash my cock, stroking me while my pants slowly slid down my legs.
“Yeah, this is much better.” She flicked her tongue over the head of my cock several times until my hips bucked and my cock slid between her thick lips.
“Maddie,” I growled when her hands cupped my ass and pushed me so she could take more of my cock in her mouth. “Oh fuck, Maddie.”
She sucked me hard and then slow, deep and deeper until I was lodged in the back of her throat. Maddie looked up at me, eyes lit with arousal and mischief. Then she swallowed. Twice. “Mmmm,” she moaned, louder when I wrapped her long brown waves around my hand.
“Maddie.”
She released me with a pop and smiled. “Do it, Jamie. Come in my mouth.” Then she took my cock again, sliding her tongue along the underside, making me shiver.
I tightened my grip on her hair and held her how I needed her, slowly pumping in and out of her mouth, fucking those sweet lips until my balls tightened, and a bead of sweat slid down my spine. “Maddie,” I growled and she sucked harder, took me deeper until I came down her throat with a shudder. “Fuck!”
When she smiled up at me, eyes fired with mischief, I pulled her up to me and tossed her on the sofa. “You little tease.”
“Hey, I’m no tease. You got off, didn’t you?”
“The sight of your lips wrapped around my cock kind of does it for me.” Even now with my cock limp, he twitched with life as the image of her sucking me off flashed in my mind. “Now, you’re at my mercy.”
“Oh no,” she said with feigned fear as her thumbs hooked into the waistband of her pajamas, tugging them down before tossing them at my chest. “Not at your mercy.”
Her pussy was pink and wet, slick with arousal and my mouth watered. “The only question is, how will I make you come first?”
She leaned back and unbuttoned her top to reveal creamy white tits with hard pink nipples. “Dealer’s choice.”
“Fuck, I love you.”
Maddie smiled and then flushed pink at my words. I dropped down on the floor in front of the sofa, pulling one hard nipple in my mouth while I rolled the other between my thumb and forefinger. “Your tits are perfect.”
“You know they’re
gonna get bigger, right?” Maddie arched into my mouth, one hand tangling in my hair, holding me right where I was as she moaned her pleasure. My hand slid down her body, between her legs and her back arched more. “Jamie, yes.”
My fingers slid deep into her went cunt, pumping slow and deep while I sucked her tits. Her pussy was soaked, and she kept bucking her hips to get my fingers deeper inside. I worked my fingers on her G-spot, and she grabbed my wrist, and ground on my hand, fucking it faster and faster.
Maddie drew closer and closer to her first orgasm of the night. I sucked a nipple harder and she let go. Moaning and squirting her juices on me.
“Jamie, yes. Fuck, yes!” She gripped my wrist, holding my fingers hostage in her pussy until she was spent. Totally fucking spent. “Wow.”
I chuckled at the dramatic way she sank into the sofa. “Jesus Christ, you trying to kill me?”
“No sweetheart, I just want to make you feel amazing. Are you good? Had enough?” I hoped not because I wasn’t done with her. I wasn’t even fucking close to done.
“Not yet. You tappin’ out, big guy?” Her skin was flush, her nipples hard, and a slow smile spread across her face.
“Never.” I kept my eyes focused on Maddie, taking in every fucking detail of her beautiful body. Her tits wiggled with every move she made, every gasp she inhaled. I stared harder when our gazes locked to make sure she understood me. “Never, Maddie. Got it?”
She nodded, mouth slightly open, lips slick as she took in slow, shallow breaths. “Got it.”
“Good. Come here.” I tugged her to her feet and lifted her in my arms with a smile. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Maddie.”
“Flatterer,” she grinned and wrapped her arms around my shoulders, kissing my neck softly as I climbed the stairs to my bedroom.
I laid her out on my bed and stared down at her for a long moment, soaking up her beauty and her arousal until it was too much to bear. “I mean it, Maddie. Don’t doubt me. Ever.”
