by A. M. Myers
“Listen,” Gavin whispers, reaching over the bed rail to reach for my hand but I pull it back and he sighs. “I have no idea what you’re going through right now and I know it has to be terrifying but I’m here and I love you.”
“But I don’t know you.”
He nods. “I know but ask me anything, okay? Maybe if you hear about us, some things will start to come back to you.”
I study him for a moment before shrugging my shoulders. Okay, fine. What the hell could it hurt, right? Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than feeling like I’m living someone else’s life right now so I need answers.
“How did we meet?” I ask, picking at a loose string on the blanket draped over my legs as I glance up at him. He smiles and a dimple pops out in his cheek as I drop my gaze back to the blanket. God, he is handsome, I’ll give him that and by all accounts, he seems perfectly nice but he’s still a stranger to me.
“We met at a bar downtown. You and Nico were having a night out after you landed some big contract and the moment I saw you, I was hooked.”
“So you walked right up to me and asked me out?”
He laughs and shakes his head. “No, actually. Usually that would have been my go-to move but I got nervous and you left before I could work up the nerve.”
“And we ran into each other again?”
“Yeah, at a charity thing a couple weeks later. I’d been kicking myself for not talking to you and I couldn’t stop thinking about you so when I saw you again, I didn’t waste any time.”
His words don’t bring any memories rushing back but I enjoy hearing him talk about the way he felt when we first met. And it’s cute to see the slight blush in his cheeks as he details seeing me for the first time.
“Where did we go for our first date?” I ask as I slowly lean forward and grip the cup of water before bringing it to my lips. The pain medicine they’ve been giving me works pretty dang well but I’m still sore as hell.
“Fiji.”
I choke on my water and he jumps up, taking the cup from my hand as I try not to die. “I’m sorry, say that again.”
“We went to Fiji on our first date,” he answers with a knowing smile. My eyes widen as I study him and I lie back on the bed with a huff.
“Well, that seems a little… extra.”
“Maybe,” he agrees as he sits back down. “But after spending most of the evening with you the night of the event, I knew that I was already falling and I wanted to impress you more than I ever wanted anything in my life.”
I fight back a smile. “And was I impressed?”
“No.”
A laugh bubbles out of me and he joins me, shaking his head.
“In fact, you told me I looked like an asshole and you weren’t that kind of girl.”
I nod in agreement. “Damn right, I’m not… but surely I came around, right?”
“Only after you insisted on paying for half of the suite and informing me that there was absolutely no way we were having sex on that trip.”
“Good,” I answer, smiling as I nod in approval. I may not remember that girl right now but I’m damn proud of her. “Remind me how long we’ve been together.”
“Nine months.” He reaches over the bed rail and this time, I let him grab my hand. His touch is comforting and still a little strange but I stopped jerking away from his touch after the first few hours of being awake. I’m still not entirely comfortable with him just grabbing my hand anytime he pleases. The eagerness on his face and the desperate look in his eyes as he tries to force me into remembering something is frustrating, but then I remind myself how hard this has to be for him. The woman he loves doesn’t know who he is and jerks away from his touch. Even for the most secure man in the world, that has to sting. I can feel his pain, filling up this hospital room like fog.
“Do we live together?”
He smiles. “Yes, baby. We do.”
I nod, lifting my gaze to the window behind him. The sun shines brightly over the city of Miami and I sigh, wondering where I fit in all this. When the doctor came to check on me this morning, he mentioned possibly sending me home in the next day or two but I have no idea where my home is. I don’t know where to go. I don’t know which key to use. Hell, I wouldn’t even know if I was in the right apartment once I got in. Not to mention, that home feels like Baton Rouge right now, not Miami, but it does bring me a little bit of comfort to know that Gavin can get me home safely at least. I just don’t know how I’ll feel about being there with him.
“Miss Shaw?” someone calls from the doorway and I turn as an older man with salt and pepper hair in a sharp blue suit walks into the room. He flashes me a kind smile that instantly puts me at ease despite the fact that I am confronted with yet another person I don’t recognize. “I’m Daniel Robash, your father’s attorney.”
I sigh. “I’m sorry. I don’t remember you.”
“Oh, no. You wouldn’t, Miss Shaw. We’ve never met.”
Relief washes through me.
Thank God.
“Could we speak in private for a moment?”
“Of course.” I glance over at Gavin and he sighs, defeat flashing across his face before he’s able to hide it. Turning to me, he smiles and releases my hand before standing from his chair next to the bed.
“I’ll run home and grab a shower before coming back for the night, okay?” He leans over me and presses his lips to the top of my head as I resist the urge to shudder. God, I wish he would stop doing that. The hand holding I’m getting used to but kissing is still too much for me.
“You don’t have to do that. I’m sure you probably want to sleep in your own bed,” I reply, glancing down at the chair he’s been stationed in for Lord knows how long and he shakes his head.
“I’ll sleep at home when you do.” He kisses me again and my shoulders jerk up before I can stop them. His heavy sigh greets me and I’m overwhelmed with guilt. “Be back soon. I love you.”
I nod and bite my lip as he steps away from the bed with pain etched into his face. Does he expect me to say it back to him? Does he hope that if he says it enough times, miraculously my memory will return and everything will be right in his world again? I’m trying so hard to be understanding of his feelings in this messed up situation but I can’t pretend to feel something I don’t. I mean, Jesus… I woke up yesterday and my whole world is flipped upside down. I don’t recognize a single person in my life and my father, the one person I could always count on, is gone.
On top of all that, I have a man claiming to be my fiancé and telling me how much he loves me. And it doesn’t really matter how attractive I think he is or how much all the nurses keep telling me of his devotion to me because when I look at him, I feel absolutely nothing.
Sighing, I watch Gavin walk out of the room before turning back to my father’s attorney. “What can I do for you, Mr. Robash?”
“I’m sorry for the intrusion, Miss Shaw,” he says, offering me a sympathetic smile and I shake my head. Truthfully, I’m thankful for his interruption. I needed a break from the suffocating feeling of Gavin hovering over me. I needed just a moment to myself where I didn’t have to be a stranger’s fiancée or best friend. “And I’m so sorry for the loss of your father. I’ve known him for many years and he was a great man.”
Pain pierces through me as I stare down at my hands resting in my lap and nod. “Thank you.”
“I’m here about his will, actually.” He motions to the chair next to my bed and I nod. “Your father had very specific instructions for me in the event of his death.”
Arching a brow, I watch him cross the room and sink into the seat. “Which were?”
“Your father and his business partner, Silas Owens, had an agreement that upon his death, Silas would purchase your father’s half of the label at two-thirds of its value and that money as well as your father’s personal wealth would all be signed over to you.”
I blink. “Oh.”
When my father was eighteen, he and his best frie
nd, Silas, started their own music label, O’Shaw Records, in my grandparents’ garage. From the way they used to tell it, it was slow going at first and they spent a couple years wondering if they’d made a mistake before they found Calliope, my mother. She sounded like an angel, lit up a room with her smile, and people fell in love with her as soon as they heard her voice. Combine that with a couple of really talented songwriters and she became their cash cow as well as the love of my dad’s life. They were inseparable and by the time I was born, she was so big that she only went by one name like Cher or Beyonce but to me, she was always the woman that made up silly songs to sing me to sleep or wake me up in the morning, the woman who baked chocolate chip cookies with me, and encouraged me to dance like no one was watching. She was wild, free, but full of so much love for her family and when I was nine, she was ripped away from us when an obsessed fan killed her.
Her death devastated my father and me as well as everyone at O’Shaw records, who we had always considered family, but Dad never stopped building the label and taking in new artists. He always said that she wouldn’t want him to fall apart and he was building a legacy for me so it’s weird now to think that it’s just gone.
“Is everything okay, Miss Shaw?” Mr. Robash asks and I blink, snapping out of my thoughts as I turn to look at him again.
“Yes, I’m sorry. I was just a little lost in thought.”
He nods. “I understand that all of this is a lot to take in. I actually have a letter for you from your father that might help you process everything.”
My eyes widen as he holds an envelope out in front of him and my hands shake as I reach up to grab it. I can’t believe this is the last thing I’m ever going to read from my father but then again, at least I’ll be able to remember it.
With my heart pounding in my chest, I pop open the seal on the envelope and pull the crisp paper out before unfolding it and sucking in a breath.
“How about I go grab some coffee and give you a minute to read that?” he asks and I nod, grateful for his suggestion. I never would have kicked him out on my own but now that he brought it up, I feel like I need to read this in private. Flashing me a sympathetic smile, he pats my hand and stands before walking out of the room. I stare at the empty doorway for a second before glancing down at the letter on my lap and picking it up.
To my baby girl,
If you’re reading this, then I suppose it means I’m no longer there with you. I can’t tell you how much it hurts to even write this letter or think of the pain you’re going through right now but I don’t want you to be too sad, sweet girl. You are strong enough to get through this and I have faith that I’m finally with your mama again and we’re watching over you from Heaven.
A sob bubbles out of me and I drop the letter into my lap as I slap my hand over my mouth, unable to go on. Hot tears spill down my cheeks and my chest aches, wishing he were here to wrap his arms around me right now and tell me that everything will be okay. It always used to make me feel so safe and I don’t know how I’m supposed to go on without it. How do I move on without the only man I’ve ever been able to count on? Through my tears, I pick the letter back up and keep reading.
You, my darling girl, are more than I could have ever dreamed of and I was so incredibly proud to call you mine each and every day I spent on this earth. You brought more joy to my life than I could ever find the words to explain and my hope for you is that one day you find the kind of love and happiness I found with you and your mom.
Now, on to business…If Mr. Robash has given you this letter, I can only assume that he’s told you the details of my will. I’ve spent most of your life telling you that I’m building the label as a legacy for you but it’s become quite clear to me in the past couple years that you are following your passion and I couldn’t imagine keeping you from that. Silas and I have come to an agreement that in the event of my death, he will buy my shares in the label from you for two-thirds of their value. I offered them to him at half their value and he offered to buy them at their full value. Silas has thought of you as his daughter, too, since the day you were born and he didn’t feel right taking your half of the company at half the price and I didn’t feel right making him buy half of the company we built together at full price so we had to compromise. If you have any questions or concerns, bring them to Mr. Robash. He’s a good man and someone that I’ve asked to look out for you after I’m gone.
Before I go, I have to leave you with a word of warning. I’m leaving you a great deal of money and I know there are people out there who will try to extort that. They will see you as an easy target and it will be hard, at times, to know who you can trust. That said, I know you can handle yourself, sweetheart. Just trust your instincts and remember who you are.
All my love,
Dad
Sucking in a stuttered breath, I let the letter fall to my lap again as I wipe the tears from my face. The loss of my father is so deep, so profound, that I can feel it molding me into a new person as I lie in my hospital bed, truly alone. Squeezing my eyes shut, I picture him in my mind and search my memory for the last time I saw him but it’s still blank, a darkness fogging over the last five years of my life that seems deeper than a moonless night. With a sigh, I relax back into the bed and stare up at the ceiling, letting the tears drip down my face and into the pillow.
“Miss Shaw?” a voice calls from the doorway and I lift my head, forcing a weak smile to my face as Mr. Robash walks into the room. “Are you ready to continue?”
I nod. “Yes.”
He walks in with his coffee cup in hand and sits next to my bed again before pulling some paperwork out of his briefcase. Clearing his throat, he flashes me a sympathetic expression.
“In his will, your father left everything else to you, including his house currently valued at three point two million, the three vehicles in his name, and the remainder of his net worth.”
“Okay…” I breathe. Even if I still had my memory, I wouldn’t be able to tell you how much my father was worth. It was never something that I was concerned with especially after I turned eighteen and I was given access to my two million dollar trust fund. “How much is that?”
“After everything was paid off, the amount left to you is…” He glances down at the forms in his hand. “Three hundred and fifty-six million dollars.”
My eyes widen and I drop my head back to the bed as I stare up at the ceiling. I knew my father and Silas had done well for themselves but the label was never something I was interested in and it didn’t really matter to me how much money he made but, Jesus… The words from his letter come rushing back to me and I suck in a nervous breath. He was right. This is the kind of money that will bring people out of the woodwork and right now it feels so overwhelming that I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around it.
One thing I know for sure is that for the second time in two days, my life has changed completely.
Chapter Three
Juliette
“Bed one-oh-six, Juliette Shaw,” Lisa, the nurse during the day shift, says as she walks into my room with Colleen at her side. Both women have tablets in their hands, taking notes as Lisa goes over my last vitals check to turn over to Colleen for the night. After Lisa is finished speaking, Colleen smiles and walks up to the side of my bed, pressing her fingers to the inside of my wrist.
“Good evening, Miss Shaw.”
I smile. “Hi, Colleen.”
“How are you feeling?”
“Pretty good,” I answer with a nod. Sure, my body is still sore from the accident but even that has dulled significantly in the past three days and the only real pain comes when I try to move too quickly. For the most part, I feel like myself again… or myself five years ago, I suppose, since my memory still has a giant blank spot in it.
“You’re looking great,” she says, pulling away to type some notes into her tablet. “Doc might even let you go home tomorrow.”
I force a smile to my face as I clasp my shaking hands toge
ther. Each time someone mentions going home, it’s the same reaction from me and I know it may not be fair to Gavin, but going home with him when I barely know him terrifies me. Not to mention, that I won’t recognize anything in my world. Laying my head back against my pillow, I sigh. I know it’s not fair to Gavin that I don’t remember him and I wish more than anything, I could go back and stop all this from happening. I would if I could and not just for myself. He’s showed me over the past few days that he’s a good man and completely devoted to me but it’s just hard to be who he wants me to be when I don’t even remember who she was. As far as I’m concerned, I’m Juliette from five years ago and it’s becoming quite clear to me that she’s a different person than the woman Gavin knows. So as much as being cooped up in this hospital bed is driving me crazy, it seems better and safer than the alternative.
Gavin’s stomach growls and I turn my head to look at him.
“You should go grab some food from the cafeteria.”
He shakes his head and crosses his arms over his chest without looking away from the game show rerun on TV. “No, I’m good.”
I watch him for a moment before sighing and turning back to Colleen. She smiles and pats my hand before quietly excusing herself from the room. Turning back to Gavin, I study his face and sigh again. He looks exhausted with the circles under his eyes even darker than they were when I woke up three days ago and I know he’s not sleeping well on the little couch in the corner of the room. Not to mention, that he refuses to leave me long enough to do anything and he hasn’t eaten since coming back to the hospital last night. He’s a stubborn man, especially when it comes to taking care of me but as much as I appreciate that, I don’t see how neglecting himself helps me.
“I’ll be okay for a little while on my own,” I assure him but he just shakes his head and I sigh again. “Gavin, you need to eat.”
