by S R Watson
Chapter Fifteen
Phoenix
“So am I to assume your inquisition on safe words means you’re saying yes?” I ask. I said I didn’t want to talk about it, but it’s useless. I know the answer, but I need her to say the words. Verbalization of her understanding of this arrangement we’re about to enter.
“What are you proposing? A D/s relationship where we explore your world of kink and be sexually exclusive, minus any romantic relationship? Did I just about sum it up?” I can’t get a read on how Harlow feels about this proposal, but she is correct.
“It’s all I’m capable of offering. I’m not looking for a girlfriend or any false expectations of things leading to more. I want to fuck you in ways that will ruin your vanilla mentality and have your pussy aching for me. I can be faithful to the arrangement, but I won’t be yours in the romantic sense. If you catch feelings, all of this will end. I’m sorry, I don’t want a relationship with anyone.” Harlow gets up and walks over to stare out of the window. I have to be honest from the beginning. I don’t believe in trickery or playing with a woman’s heart. She has to be in this for the right reasons. I don’t know if I’m capable of loving or being loved, so I’d rather not start down a path that leads to disappointment. Things are safer this way. No expectations equal zero disappointments. I am, however, willing to give her the best of me, if she lets me. My sins. My darkness. My demons. They define who I am and, at present, the best I can offer, hence the best of me.
“Okay,” she says so lightly, I’m unsure if I heard her correctly.
“Okay, what?” I get up and walk over to the window where she is standing. She turns around and looks me directly in the eyes.
“Sir. Okay, Sir.” I can’t believe my fucking ears. That is not what I was implying or expecting her to say. I was merely trying to get a clear answer of agreement of our arrangement. Those words coming from her mouth is music to my ears. My cock is at full attention now. She looks down, entering into submission mode. I lift her chin because that is not what I want. I put her hand over the hardness of my jeans, so she can feel how happy she has made me.
“You see what you do to me?” I’m milliseconds from saying to hell with it and bending her over right here when I hear the door downstairs. The guys are back. Dammit. “You’re safe for now. But later—” I cut my sentence short as Killian is the first one upstairs. Harlow leaves out the door onto the deck. I’m guessing to hide that blush I’ve put on her face.
“Have you heard from Desiree yet?” Ren asks, following Killian.
“Not yet.” I look up at the clock. It’s twenty past the hour. Her call is late. “Don’t worry. She’ll call.” I don’t want to worry, but I’m curious as to why we haven’t heard anything. What if the executives said no? This would be a major disappointment for the guys.
“What if they’ve decided not to bring us on?” Killian asks, echoing my thoughts.
“Then we keep trying. Pretty Boy Rock is a huge upcoming record label, but if they don’t sign us, then it’s their loss.” The door opens and closes downstairs—Asher’s back. I might as well find something to watch on the TV, I hate this waiting shit. Patience is not a virtue for me.
“Look who I found outside,” Asher announces as he enters the room. It’s Desiree. My heart speeds up as I jump off the sofa.
“Hello, guys. Sorry, I’m late. That traffic was monstrous, but I didn’t want to deliver the news over the phone.” That has to be good news, right? Surely, she wouldn’t have driven all this way just to tell us no. Asher waves at Harlow to summon her to join us. Desiree heads to our dining table and sets down a briefcase. She has the tightest dress on. I can’t see how she can breathe, let alone walk. I see the lust in the eyes of the guys with every step she takes in her stilettos. She swings her hips, not sure if it’s her natural switch, or if she is putting on an enticing show for us. Even Asher’s nose is open, and he has a woman who he is seeing at the moment. That long-distance shit is for the birds. Still, I’m not even tempted. I just want the news. Is this the moment that changes our lives forever?
“Not a problem. We’re glad that you made it. Unexpected, but a pleasant surprise,” I assure.
“Glad to hear it because I have some good news,” Desiree comments. My ears perk up, and the guys move in closer to the table as she continues, “Our label wants to sign you guys.”
“Hell, yes!” Asher woots.
“Oh, man. How does this work? When do we start?”
“Well, I’ve been assigned to manage you guys. Please understand that you won’t start as the main act. You guys have only a few of your own original tracks, and you don’t have a substantial following outside the clubs you play.” I expected that we would have to put in the work. We’re ready to do what it takes. “We would start by having you guys be the opening act for Wild Silence.”
“Holy shit.” I can barely contain my surprise. Those guys are fucking huge. I admire their sound, and their story is similar to ours in respect to how they got started.
“Yeah. They’re pretty huge,” Desiree says, reading my mind. “Their tour stops are always sold out and guaranteed to get you guys the exposure you need. You’ll play your original music, but you will need to get in the studio to record more. We can discuss the logistics later about a producer and possible co-writer. We don’t want to change your sound.” Desiree opens the briefcase on the table and shuffles through some files.
“What are the numbers?” I ask. I’m the spokesperson for our band. It all sounds great, but the dollars have to make sense for us.
I know we have to prove ourselves first before we can expect a huge payout, but a contract needs to stipulate a percentage with progression as we make a name in the industry. Desiree looks over at Harlow, who has been quiet up to this point. It is obvious that she doesn’t want to disclose our figures in front of her.
“I’ll just step outside,” Harlow says, apparently also feeling the vibe. “Congrats, guys. You deserve it.”
“Thank you,” Killian and Ren say in unison. I just nod my thanks.
“I’ll be out there in a second,” Asher tells her. She waves her hand slightly and disappears out onto the deck. Desiree waits until she is both out of earshot and sight before she continues.
“The label is prepared to offer you guys fifteen percent, and that’s pretty generous. The industry standard is thirteen. The breakdown is that the label gets sixty percent because they carry all the upfront costs of getting you guys produced and promoted. Distribution gets twenty percent and ensures that your album is released everywhere, as well as optimal radio time.” Desiree lays out a pie graph that outlines how our pay is broken down.
“So our lawyer, producer, and managers get paid out of our twenty percent?” She nods in the affirmative. “Why do we need two managers?”
“Well, as your business manager, I get five percent. If you act as the personal manager for your group, you can filter some of the percentage among your band and take a greater percentage for yourself.” The guys all agree this would be the fair thing to do.
“You guys will get a million-dollar advance up front to record your album, pay the expenses we just discussed, and for tour support.” I can’t find anything wrong with this deal. As she stated, it all seems legit and fair, not to mention generous. She steps outside briefly with Harlow, for us to discuss, but it doesn’t take us long to deliberate. This is our blessing. The guys get choked up over the million dollars, but I remind them of the breakdown. They need me, Mr. Control Freak, in charge. I’m logical and will be frugal as fuck when it comes to our band. There will be no fucking off the money. We summon Desiree back in, and Harlow returns with her.
“One last question.” The guys look at me like I’ve grown a second head. In their mind, it’s a done deal. It is, I just have one more question. “When will be starting to tour? Oh, and we’re keeping the name Phoenix Rising.”
“Legitimate question,” Desiree surmises. “Of course you’ll be keeping you
r name. It’s badass. Your tour will start at the beginning of January. That gives you guys a couple of months to perfect the songs you already have written and get them professionally recorded. Maybe pick one of them as your first single. It will also allow time to at least start on some new material to sample while on tour.” She smiles and hands me a pen as she pushes the contract in my direction. “I will need a signature from each of you if you’re on board.”
“We are.” I smile back. My day has been made, first with Harlow and now this. I know our lives will be changed forever. I lean over the table and proudly sign my name to the piece of paper that is the evidence of everything we’ve worked hard for.
Once Desiree has all of our signatures, she shakes our hands. “Welcome aboard,” she congratulates. “I look forward to managing you guys. I know we’re going to do some wonderful things. Can you all come down this weekend to meet the executives? I know you have a regular gig at Club Luxe, and this is short notice.”
“Sure. I’ll talk to Steve today. He’ll understand. He wanted this for us. He knew there would be some conflicts with our schedule to play there in pursuit of our dreams.” I will never forget what he did for us. Club Luxe will always be our home.
“Great! I want to take you guys out on Saturday. We’ll get dinner, and then we’ll hit Excalibur. The club is owned by the senior VP of Pretty Boy Rock, so we’ll get the VIP treatment.” She winks. The guys woot and howl their excitement. It’s been a while since we’ve been to a club just to party because we always have a gig on the weekend. As long as it’s on the label’s dime, I’m game. This very well just may be our last time to unwind, since we’re going to have to step our game up. Our schedule is about to get really hectic.
“Looking forward to it.” I shake Desiree’s hand one last time before she leaves. I turn to look at the guys. I don’t want to wait until the weekend to celebrate. I’m thinking a nice low-key dinner and drinks are in order. “What do you guys say to us going out and celebrating, now that it’s official? Nothing major—just dinner and drinks.”
“I’m game for it. We can save the partying until this weekend,” Killian suggests.
“Yeah. Like our last hoorah,” Ren adds. This is why we mesh so well. None of us are into drugs and major partying. Don’t get me wrong; we are far from saints. We just have always put the needs of the band first. We’re not your stereotypical definition of a rock band. We do love pussy, though, and will indulge in that shit. We named ourselves Phoenix Rising for this very reason. Still, the band comes first.
“Come on. Let’s do this,” Asher says, slapping me on the back. “Are you coming, Harlow?” She hasn’t said much, and I wonder what she is thinking. I’m going to have to find time this week to go and see her, so we can explore our arrangement. In light of our record deal, I don’t know how much time we will have, but I’m definitely ready to fuck the shit out of her. My balls ache just thinking about it.
“No, you guys go ahead. This is your day. I can wait here until you get back if you all are going now,” she says.
“Nonsense. But I will take you back to the dorm if you’re ready,” Asher speaks up. I want to volunteer, so I can solidify a plan for this week. Then again, that would be just plain torture not to be able to have her now. Besides, I don’t want to raise sudden suspicion. The guys know that I’m not that generous. My reputation with the extent of my relationship with women is quite tainted. Instead, I watch as she nods in agreement and gives us a small wave goodbye. She looks at me briefly, but I’m unable to communicate that I will be in contact. She leaves with Asher, and I’m forced to wait until she gets back to her dorm. I will call her and set this fuckship in motion.
Harlow
When I get back to the dorms, Irelyn is out. I know she will have plenty of questions for me, so I appreciate the reprieve. I need some time to reflect on my conversation with Phoenix. I’m still reeling in shock to learn that he considers himself a dominant. I’m still unsure of what all that means. What does he want me to do? What does he want to do with me? My mind has cycled through several scenarios and possibilities on the way here. Asher had asked why I was so quiet. Now that I’m alone with my thoughts, the nerves have kicked in. I want this with him. I want to try. I must admit it sounds exciting to release control, but scary at the same time. Can I do it? I wasn’t forthcoming with him about my past. I have secrets that I haven’t disclosed to anyone. Still, I want this. I need this. For so long, I’ve hidden behind the makeup and baggy clothes. I was afraid of a man to see me. I was afraid of intimacy. The change in clothes and makeup was the first step at normalcy for me. Owning my sexuality is logically the next step.
I can’t worry about where this music career will take Phoenix. The guys will be going on tour soon, so I know that will end whatever we are about to embark on. As long as I remember that this is just a fuck and the chance to explore my sexuality, I’ll be fine. I will enjoy it while it lasts. He will be my stepping-stone in preparation for the next man who comes along.
My phone rings, and I smile when I see that it is Phoenix. I wonder if he is anticipating our hook up like I am.
“Hello,” I answer, feigning indifference.
“Hey, princess.” I have to admit the fact that he calls me that is growing on me. It’s quite different from when Asher says it—a naughty undertone that is kind of hot. “Glad to see you made it home. Have you been thinking about our discussion?”
“Nope. Just pulled out my books to study,” I fib. I can’t let on that is all I have been able to think about since I left. I lie across my bed and cup the phone closer to my ear. I’m glad Irelyn is not here to see this cheesy ass grin on my face. His voice is just so sexy over the phone. I can’t explain why he has the ability to turn me into a mush of hormones.
“Lies,” he accuses. “I bet you’re wet right now. You have FaceTime, don’t you?”
“Yes,” I answer hesitantly. Where is he going with this? “Why?”
“Mmm, I want to see.”
“See what?” My voice raises an octave in surprise. My heart slams against my chest. I know it has something to do with exposing myself.
“I want to see how wet your pussy is for me. How turned on you are just thinking about everything I’ve told you.” His voice is husky now, and I recognize the change. He is every bit of turned on as I am. He is right. I’m soaking, but I’m too chickenshit to show him. Both encounters with him have been in the dark: my fears hidden in the shadows—a way for me to be brave.
Chapter Sixteen
Harlow
Holy crap! What was I thinking? How did I ever think I could do this? Liberation, my ass. I don’t think I can go from totally covered and hiding, to naked and bare for him without a way to hide my insecurities.
“Phoenix—” I begin, but he cuts me off.
“Don’t sweat it. I don’t need the visual proof. It’s in the voice. It tells me all that I need to know. From the slight hitch of your breath to the hesitation in your speech, I know I affect you. You’re ready for my cock, and that is all that matters. I’m going to fuck the shyness right out you, princess. There will be no more room left for preservation—only lust, want, and lack inhibition,” he promises. “That tingling you’re feeling right now. That’s your pussy agreeing with me. It wants everything I have to offer. She’s the brave one. She’s the one who responds to me when you’re too afraid to. She and I will be getting well acquainted.”
I squeeze my legs together because he is right. The ache between my legs is downright unbearable. His forwardness is raw and speaks to “her,” just as he predicted.
“Umm, okay.” Gah, I can hear the quiver in my own voice. “So when are we going to see each other?” Not too obvious, right? Especially since I really want to ask, “When do you plan on getting acquainted with her?” He chuckles on the other end of the phone because he sees right through my subliminal question.
“What time do you get out of class on Wednesday?”
“Monday and We
dnesdays are my light days, so I’ll be done before noon.” I’m going to have to think of something tell Irelyn. I can’t divulge the truth. She will just try to talk me out of it—insist that he is using me. She doesn’t know my past, so she wouldn’t be able to fathom why I need this. Our last plan was to make Phoenix jealous of how he dismissed me so easily, last time we fucked. She will think I’m absolutely crazy for giving him a chance to do it again.
“Perfect. I can pick you up by one. We can grab lunch and get the same hotel.”
“Okay.” Tension builds, as I’m more concerned about how I’m going to explain my disappearance. I don’t want to have to lie to her, yet it is all I seem to be doing lately.
“I want you to do something for me before I let you off the phone.” His voice takes on an even huskier vibrato. I’m scared to ask.
“What is that?” I ask anyway.
“I want you to unbutton those jeans you’re wearing and slide your hand into your panties,” he instructs. What the? I look toward the door. Irelyn could come in at any minute. “Now, princess.” Damn. The command is sharp, but not offensive. This is it: the beginning of his control. He can’t see me, so I could pretend, but I need to use his absence as practice. I’ve touched myself before—not often, but I’ve done it.
