She also pointed out, and it hadn’t occurred to him, that the minute they became talked about, her mother would know, his mother would find out too and the pressure piled upon them would become as heavy as the Earth itself. Pippa wanted to keep what had happened just between them a secret for now, a secret they would hug to themselves throughout the next half term, reverting back to being professional, appearing to be friends, colleagues and nothing more. Then in July they could see how things lay. When they no longer had to work side by side, they could see if they felt as they did now, and have six weeks just like this weekend, to spend together with no outside distractions.
He knew she spoke sense.
Now on the doorstep, their weekend coming to a close, they paused their kissing and stared at each other all happy, and safe in the knowledge that neither would have rather spent the last twenty-four hours any other way.
‘Thank you for a fabulous day. And night. And morning.’ He could hear mischievousness in her tone as she spoke. ‘I had the best time and I shall see you in school, Mr Choudhury’. Pippa stood up on tiptoes and whispered it in his ear, a smile on her face that summed up all that joy one feels at having a new lover, new plans, and shared secrets.
He leant in for one last kiss, determined to remember how this moment felt, to fix it in his head and make it a memory to hold on to, to get him through the next six weeks.
‘Mmmm. I must go, or my mother will be having kittens. I promised to take her out for lunch for her birthday, and I should probably get home and change first, and grab the present I made. I’ll see you on Monday.’
‘You will. But we won’t be able to do this.’ He kissed her again.
‘No, we won’t.’ She gave a little half-smile, a shrug. ‘You cannot out me as the woman who sleeps with her boss.’
‘I’m not your boss, Rosy is.’
‘I know, if only she were interested, huh,’ she winked. ‘Put me down and let me go. My mother will kill me if I’m late.’
‘She’ll forgive you when she sees the bracelet. I reckon we can gamble on one last kiss.’
‘Oh, go on then.’
As he watched her walk away, he knew his grin had taken over his face. She rounded the corner and his phone vibrated against his leg. He pulled it out of his pocket. Maybe it was her, saying she’d be back after she had taken her mum to lunch.
It wasn’t.
‘Where are you? I’m sitting in the car park at Fistral and you’re nowhere to be seen.’
‘Oh shit, Ben, sorry. My weekend panned out differently than I expected. Um, I’ll grab my stuff and jump in the car now. Start without me and I’ll see you in the water. Sorry, mate. Right behind you, promise.’
Chapter Thirty-eight
The two men sat on the beach, boards by their side, staring out to the sea, watching the beach live its summer life: families with small children, buckets and spades, and cooler bags full of food; old stalwarts with their beach windbreaks and a sturdy mallet; teenagers meeting, pleased to escape the presence of their parents; and of course, the surf community, out in force today. Ben had started a fire once the sun started to go down and they were both sitting there with a flask of coffee, drinking from old tin mugs and looking out across the ocean.
‘Honestly, mate, I’m not sure what you’re making the fuss about. You really like her.’
‘I really like her.’
‘Right, so that’s great. You really like her; she liked you enough to stay over the night, sorry, to stay-over-and-have-the best-weekend-of-your-life-like-ever. Surely that’s job done and all’s good.’
‘No. Not at all. When we were together it made sense for us to have this weekend and then wait because…’
‘Oh no, tell me you did not ruin this by telling her about your five-year bloody plan!’
‘She knows about that and she thinks it’s a good idea.’ Kam grinned as Ben shook his head and placed it in his hands, as if all hope had left the world. ‘But no, not that. To wait and get this half term out of the way, see where I stand on the job front, have a chance to be together and see how things go before everyone knows.’
‘And before your mum descends,’ Ben laughed knowingly. ‘All sounds very sensible to me. So what wrong with that?’
‘I’m worried that this will turn into a one-night stand, that we will move back into the friendzone and not be able to leave it again. I want a relationship with Pippa and I want it now. The rest will all sort itself out. It seems bloody stupid to spend the next six weeks being in the classroom with her and acting like nothing’s happened, when to me everything’s happened. Sod my plan. This throws it all up on its head and twirls it around. I’m prepared to take the gamble. I’m in a good place. Even if I don’t get the Penmenna job, I’ve got all these other interviews coming up. Dad might not be happy with my decision to teach, and I’ve always wanted to make him proud, but you know what, I’m a good man – I am – and if that’s not enough for him, then why would I put my future happiness on hold for approval I may never get. Pippa’s awesome. I want to give this a go and I want to give it a go now.’
‘Okay. I’ve never seen you so fired up. I agree with pretty much all of that, but some perspective perhaps? You’ve spent one night with her. Maybe you’re pushing too far, too fast? Maybe you should slow down, keep it professional at work, wait out the term and see how things develop, you know, slowly. Slowly, slowly.’
‘Yes, I appreciate that. But it’s not slowly, slowly. It could be stop, stop. It feels fraudulent. I want to speak up, know for certain what’s going on in her head. I was so convinced we were on the same page, but now, in the cool light of day, what if we weren’t? What if I was a quickie and she wants to get on with everything with nothing changing, and then she can let me off the hook completely when we’ve finished working together? She told me her friends accuse her of being a commitment-phobe and they’ve known her a lot longer than I have. Why would she change that now, after one weekend? Perhaps the doubt will seep in, perhaps the doubt never left?’
‘Did you ask her?’
‘Not outright, no. In the moment it didn’t occur to me.’
‘So now you’re out of the moment, perhaps you should find your voice?’
‘Yeah, maybe.’
‘Well then, do it. Even if you’re postponing things until the end of term, you are able to speak to her! Come on, you’re a lion. Let’s hear you roar!’
‘Meow.’
‘Yeah, thought as much. I was trying to be kind but you’re your own worst enemy.’ Ben laughed at his friend.
‘Aren’t we all?’
‘That’s the truth. Look, this seems to be eating you up a bit.’
‘It is. I seem to veer from being completely loved-up to being full of doubt, and that was just on the drive over. I don’t like it.’
‘So sort it out, and if you feel too awkward saying it to her face, then write her a letter, and that way she gets time to process it, think about things and isn’t forced into an immediate answer. It might just be the perfect solution.’
Kam looked at his friend in amazement. He was fond of Ben for many reasons but his friend had never been known for his great ideas, but this one was brilliant. It would totally solve all the worries circling around in Kam’s head without turning him into that James, the kind of creep who followed Pippa around insisting she became his girlfriend. Kam took a slurp of coffee.
He knew he was good at lots of things and was super secure in the person he was. He was just a bit shit about talking about his emotions with anyone. He didn’t know why but the words just wouldn’t come out. He knew good communication was the way to help take things forward but when he tried, his mouth would dry up and nothing would come out. He’d make an idiot of himself and worsen the chances of what he wanted to achieve rather than helping them. A letter meant he could be really clear in what he wanted to say, and Ben was right: it would achieve that without putting Pippa on the spot.
‘Ben, you’re a genius!’
‘Yeah, one would have thought you would have spotted that before now.’ They both chuckled into their mugs and Kam realised his oldest friend had hit upon the perfect solution. He looked up as the sun set across the coastline, knowing he had had the perfect weekend and was surrounded by people he cared deeply for. Life was good, and he had a letter to write.
Chapter Thirty-nine
Pippa wandered into the classroom early and with coffee in her hand. She still couldn’t manage to wipe the grin off her face. Her mother had loved the bracelet on Sunday and had assumed that Pippa was so happy because of the thoughtful nature of her gift. Pippa wasn’t about to tell her any different.
Now it was Monday and she was still smiling. It was going to be tough acting normally around Kam. She hadn’t stopped thinking about him from the moment she had skipped down the street away from his flat in Treporth Bay, and it had taken all her self-control not to text him last night. The texting was a habit – a really nice habit – they had fallen into but since sleeping together she was a bit worried about texting him straight after. She’d been super clear about this not turning into a relationship, about keeping things on the down-low because she didn’t want to jeopardise him getting the full-time position. To text now might blur the clarity of that. She wondered if she had done the right thing, but the night of the school fayre, as they had lain on the grass, she had seen how important it was to him to keep his career on track. She cared too much about him to let anything jeopardise that.
But principles aside, the thought of seeing him this morning was making her dizzy with anticipation. The whole of her was fizzing as she walked through the door to the classroom.
‘Hello.’ She so wanted to give him a kiss hello. Argghh, this was awkward. She knew she couldn’t. That would be a direct contradiction of everything they had set out. But it would be oh so easy just to reach up…
She had to make do with smiling at him instead to which she received a grin from him that lit up his whole face.
Oh goody. He was obviously feeling it too.
‘Anything extraordinary for today?’
‘No, all on plan. Big introduction of the new half term’s topic – which has to be the easiest cross curricular ever.’
‘Right? How great Cornwall is and why. How is that anything other than bliss? I could help teach that all year round.’
‘I think you do, just without realising. Oh shit, I’ve left the resource bag in the car. Um, if I dash and grab it, are you alright here?’
‘Of course. Run, they’ll be in in a minute.’
‘I know.’
‘And they’ll all be desperate to see their new favourite teacher. The one who before half term proved he was the second best in the world at space hopping!’
‘Well, I’m first in the world at space hopping, so I’ll take that with the amendment obviously. But favourite teacher, don’t think so.’
‘You’re mine.’ She gave him a cheeky wink and watched his eyes widen. As she held her hands up, she continued, ‘My bad. Rule breaking and I’ve only been in a few minutes. Will abide by them all from now on, promise.’
‘I think we both know you enjoy bending the rules now and again.’ He stood close to her and an image of Saturday whirled into her head, the way he had placed his hands on her back, her shoulders, her tummy, her inner thigh. Whoosh, the flood of lust came flying back.
She needed to get her head back in the game. She had barely been in three minutes and she was already about to mess everything up. Boundaries had been laid down for a very good reason and she wasn’t changing them now. If they wanted to make this work long term, they couldn’t fall down at the first hurdle.
‘No. We need to keep it how it is, and there’s no way I’m letting you put the Class Two job on the line. Oh shit, there’s Marion.’ Pippa spotted an immaculate blonde helmet of hair heading their way through the window, stopping to speak to parents she deemed acceptable on her way to the classroom and sniff at those she felt weren’t. ‘Go, or you’ll never get your stuff from the car. Quick. I’ll field her.’
‘Are you going to tell her? About Richard?’
‘Argggh. I don’t know, girl code says I probably should, but then we’re not really best friends. I don’t want to be the one passing on gossip that could turn her life upside down. The sensible option is to stay out of people’s marriages. We don’t know what we saw. it could be completely innocent.’
‘Hmmm. At three in the morning?’
‘Yes. We can’t jump to assumptions. It’s not as if we saw him standing in a doorway kissing someone.’
‘Like we were.’
They maintained eye contact as Kam spoke and she felt all the feels zing through her body. This was crazy. They were going to get caught before the register had been taken at this rate.
‘Stop and go and get your things! You’re so bad.’
Kam grinned naughtily – conspiratorially – at her as he left. She looked around the classroom, knowing it was only going to be empty for another thirty seconds, and breathed in a deep sigh of contentment. This really was her happy place: the bright colours, the effort she knew that had gone into every picture, every piece of work around the classroom, the laughter that fuelled the room, the hustle bustle of the children learning.
‘Hello, Miss Parkin. Is Kam about?’
‘Hello, Marion, he’ll be back in a minute. Can I help you with anything?’
‘No, I don’t think so, dear.’ Marion sniffed. She really was an arse. Pippa could not see why Rosy, Sylvie and Alice had so much time for her.
Pippa stood eyeing Marion and Marion stood doing the same right back, when Pippa decided to be the bigger person and break the spell.
‘Wasn’t the May Fayre a success? You must be so happy.’
‘Well, there was that dreadful woman. She won’t be allowed back. We can only have the most responsible parents on the PTA, not some half-drunk slattern who can’t behave in public. Imagine if she had acted like that when we were out with the school. What if she had had an outburst at Penmenna Hall when they were filming for the show?’
Pippa, and she suspected most of the other people in the hall that afternoon, felt that Marion had had it coming for quite some time, but because of the hazy afterglow from the weekend, or the excitement of working alongside Kam today, or maybe the promise she had made her mum before the half-term holiday, Pippa felt like trying again.
‘Did you have a good half term? Did the boys do anything nice?’
‘The boys had very full, very productive days. Rafe had drama school all week, very exclusive, and the others did a week-long surf school. Then in the evenings we had an intensive Latin course for all three of them.’
‘Latin? Rufus is only five.’
‘Never too early to start a classical education.’
Pippa felt herself about to say ‘Hmmm’, and stopped in time as she realised that was the Choudhury family’s phrase. ‘It was nice to see Richard at the fayre,’ Pippa said instead, as the children started to stream in.
‘Yes, lovely to have him back. He was here for the whole of half term, absolutely wonderful. We got to spend a lot of time together, although he did have to go and work briefly with a colleague who lives down here, same building as Kam I think. Lovely woman, hard worker. I did think she’d be a good fit for Alex actually, before he found Sylvie. Ooh, there’s Kam now. Of course, he must have opened the door to let the kids in. Walk, don’t run, young man.’ Marion tapped Billy on the head and turned her full headlamps beam onto Kam and stalked across the room towards the teacher, already deluged with small children clinging to him and telling him their tales of summer half term.
Pippa went to fetch her tablet so she could enter lunch numbers, and wondered if she was doing the right thing by not mentioning Richard sneaking out of that flat at daft o’clock, although from what Marion had said it was probably work related. Spotting Kam still talking with Marion, Pippa clapped her hands and lead the children to the car
pet where they could all say good morning. Kam caught her eye – those eyes – and issued a silent thank you as he manoeuvred around Marion and towards the children.
‘Hello, Class, lovely to see you all back and well rested and ready to do tons of hard work, yes?’ He laughed as the class made faux groaning noises. Once they dispersed to their activities, Kam went over to a pile of papers and started to rifle through them. Pippa watched him (she hadn’t actually taken her eyes off him since he’d come back into the class). He seemed to have lost something, going through the pile and checking three times. He ran his fingers along the inside of his collar and brought his eyes up, flitting about the class, dwelling on window ledges and worktops to see if he could see what he had misplaced.
Pippa approached him, reminding herself to keep to the agreement whilst really wanting to say, ‘Oh my god, let’s spend every day and every night together.’ She definitely deserved a sainthood for this.
‘Everything okay?’
‘Um… yeah. Yes. Nothing to worry about. I had something to give you. I spent all of last night getting it right… um… but I must have carried it over to the office and left it on Sheila’s desk when I was photocopying on my way back from the car.’
The Cornish Village School--Summer Love Page 21
