by Nicole Thorn
Before stepping in, I smoothed my suit. It was dark gray, verging on black. I hadn’t bothered with a tie, because I didn’t want Celeste using it to steer me—something she’s done many times before. Too many times before, really. I thought I looked fussy, but my sisters assured me that I looked just fine.
I’d have to trust them.
We stepped inside. The whispering started immediately. Art is a very dangerous medium sometimes. Not all pieces of art, or books, or songs are written with high emotion. But most are. With music and books, it’s not too bad because the creator doesn’t touch every single copy. With paintings and sculptures, that’s not always true. Walking into the gallery was like walking into tactile static.
Jasmine put her arm through mine and that centered me. Enough that I saw the demigods coming towards us and—
Oh wow. I think my brain short circuited.
Kezia was gorgeous. She was in a green dress that looked familiar. I might have been able to place it if it weren’t for the way my brain had gone on vacation. It was modest enough that when people looked at her, it was to stare at her beauty. The green fabric hugged her hips and breasts, letting me know just what had been under all those sweaters. Her long legs were fully visible, the soft skin looked tempting. Like they wanted me to put them around my waist and do things. Lots of things.
Her hair was loose and curled so that it fluffed up around her face. She was sans makeup, which I appreciated. She was beautiful enough without anything to hide what she really looked like.
Which was why I could see the quiet panic in her eyes as people turned to watch her walk past them. She held onto Zander for dear life and tried not to look like that’s what she was doing. I could sympathize, probably more than she could understand. Being around this many people put me on edge, too. Not nearly as much as her, but I could still understand.
Jasmine bumped me with her hip. “Words. Jasper. Words and not drool.”
I gave my sister a withering look and she smiled even broader. “Hey, Zander, we should go make fun of the stuff that Celeste did. Here.” She thrust me towards Kezia and I barely managed not to fall over the poor girl. She looked as surprised as me, especially when Zander took her hand and put it were Jasmine’s had been seconds before.
And then took off.
Immediately, she removed her hand and the whispering got much louder. The look on my face must have changed, because she took it again. “Jasper? Are you okay?” she asked. “Is it… too loud in here?”
She was asking if the noise was too much. I appreciated her concern, but waved it away. “I’m fine, as long as someone I know keeps me grounded. I won’t make you hold onto me all night, though. Let’s go see if we can’t find Juniper.”
Kezia’s fingers tightened on me, keeping me from moving. “Um, no,” she said and then blushed when I looked at her. “I mean… I’m fine. Really. Let’s, uh, go look at Celeste’s stuff?”
I nodded and guided Kezia out of the crowd. It wasn’t that hard. They were looking at the paintings, so I went behind the paintings. And then Kezia and I didn’t need to feel like we were being suffocated anymore. She breathed a sigh of relief that I’m sure she hadn’t wanted me to see. “You look gorgeous, by the way,” I said. “The dress really suits you.”
She blushed to her roots and shifted her feet. “Um. Thanks. You don’t clean up so bad yourself.”
I looked down at the suit. Despite her compliment, I still felt like a kid trying on his dad’s clothes. So I shrugged. That way I responded to her comment, but didn’t have to actually pretend like I believed her.
It was oddly private, behind the paintings. The noise of the crowd was quieter for one thing and people weren’t constantly looking at us. It gave me the opportunity to realize how twitchy Kezia really was. She kept messing with her dress, like she was trying to make it bigger, or change what she was wearing altogether.
I pulled my suit jacket off and offered it to her. She blinked and then looked up at me. I shrugged. “You’re gorgeous, like I said, but I’d rather you feel comfortable. It might be a little hot with this on, but…”
She smiled shyly and took the jacket. “Thanks Jasper.” She pulled it on and it went almost to her hips. Her legs were still showing, though and there was nothing I could do about that. Still, she looked much more relaxed.
“Well. We’re here,” Kezia said. “We should probably at least make an appearance for…”
“Go head.”
“The Dragon Lady,” Kezia finished. Her cheeks were still slightly flushed, but that only made her even more beautiful. I pulled out from behind the paintings and we were back in the crowd. Some of them immediately glanced at Kezia, but she didn’t seem to notice. A few of them glanced at me, as well. No doubt wondering how the hell I managed to snag a woman like her. If only they knew.
The first painting we came to was… Well, Kezia snickered a little bit. Celeste did abstracts and this painting was definitely abstract. There were colors splashed all over and drips of what looks like blood on the sides. Mostly, though, the canvas was white and in the center was a plastic fork. Just there. Taped to the center.
“Are we supposed to speculate on what this painting is supposed to be?” Kezia asked, with something akin to hope in her voice.
I shrugged. “I generally don’t bother. Art, all art, is what you decide it is. Debating and speculating it isn’t stimulating conversation. However, if we want to discuss almost anything else, I’m cool with that.”
Kezia grinned again. “What did you think of The Avengers?” she asked.
I laughed, unable to stop myself. “Well, my sister seems to like Thor a lot, but that worries me more than it probably should.”
“Which sister?” I gave her a look. “Jasmine?” I nodded.
Speaking of which… I looked around until I spotted Jasmine and almost groaned. She had scaled Zander somehow—and yeah, it probably involved him letting her scale him—and was hanging a cup from a light fixture. She didn’t speak loudly, but I still clearly heard her say, “Behold. True art!”
Zander laughed as he brought her back down. “I would pay a lot of money for that,” he declared.
“They’re going to get us arrested,” I murmured.
“Don’t worry. Zander can Charm his way out of any kind of arrest. I’ve seen some things that you would not believe.” She sighed and burrowed deeper into my jacket. Quite suddenly, I got the image of me pushing her up against a wall in my head. I shoved it away, because I knew Kezia would not be cool with that. Not at all.
I looked around again until I found Juniper. She was up against a wall, hiding from everyone. She had a white knuckled grip on her phone, like she was prepared to beg one of us for help. However, it looked like everyone was leaving her alone, so I had nothing to go rescue her from. Other than herself. If it were easy to save people from themselves, then they probably wouldn’t need rescuing to begin with.
“Oh, no,” Kezia said. I followed her gaze back to Jasmine and Zander. Now they were drawing on the cup in sharpie. Maybe I should go over there and stop them before something truly horrible happened. Or, I could let them sink or swim on their own. Choices, choices.
“Kizzy! Jasper!” Celeste said from behind us. Kezia and I turned around to look at her. She was rushing to us as fast as her heels would allow. They were tall enough to make her ankles look small. She was in a black dress that was slit almost down to her bellybutton and had her blond hair styled so that it practically clung to her head.
She smiled brightly. “I’m so glad you decided to come,” she said. “I was beginning to think that none of you would show up.” She batted doe eyes at Kezia, whose face immediately turned sour. I regretted telling her about Celeste and me, because her hate was profound.
Celeste circled us until she stood next to me. She dragged her fingers along my shoulders, before letting her hand come to rest on one. She eyed the jacket that Kezia was wearing and then eyed me. It was very clearly my jacket, but s
he didn’t comment, or even look intrigued. She turned back to the painting. She traded her hand on my shoulder, for her elbow, so that she could drag her finger across her lip. Thus bringing our attention to her lip.
“What do you think of it?” She asked, gesturing towards the painting. Now that I was looking, I saw that it was called The Problem with Society. It was just a fork… on a piece of canvas.
I’ve had time to get used to Celeste’s paintings, though, so I smiled and hoped it looked genuine. “It’s really good.”
She grinned. “Thank you, Jasper. I could always count on you to see where I’m going with something. It’s why I need you in my life. Do you have anyone like that Kizzy?” Celeste asked, turning her hot blue eyes onto the girl still staunchly holding onto my arm.
Kezia cleared her throat. “Yeah. My brother.”
Celeste chuckled, but not unkindly. “No, not like that. You know.” She slid her arm around my waist, trying to pull me out of Kezia’s grip without it looking like that was her goal. I refused to move and that took care of her attempt. “Someone who sees everything about you. Knows everything about you. What you like. What you don’t like. How you need to be treated. And you know everything about them.”
Celeste looked up at me and poured affection into her eyes. “That’s what Jasper is to me. Don’t you have anyone like that?”
This was getting really uncomfortable.
Kezia cleared her throat. I thought she would have let go me then. I know how Celeste works. Even knowing what she does and knowing what she’s capable of, sometimes she still got to you. Sometimes, you still believed her. Currently, she was pulling off a pretty good ‘I made a mistake in letting him go’ ‘he’s my soulmate’ act and I was worried that Kezia believed it.
Instead, her fingers tightened around my arm, like she was preparing to haul me out of the way if things didn’t chill out and soon. She smiled back at my ex and it was a bright smile. Almost as convincing as one of Celeste’s. It would have been perfect, if not for the number of teeth she managed to flash in that one smile. I got the feeling Celeste should have backed off right then.
“Unfortunately, no,” Kezia said. “But one day. Maybe one day soon, I’ll have that.” Her voice was sugary sweet. I looked around, hoping that one of my sisters or Zander would be around to pull the girls apart when the bitch fight broke out, because I was almost positive a bitch fight was about to break out.
Celeste turned her own smile up a notch. Her voice was practically honey. “That’s good. You keep trying. I’m sure a pretty little thing like you will be able to find someone soon. I mean, look at your brother. I’m sure he’s beating them off with a stick and you’re almost as beautiful as he is.”
I pulled my arm out of Celeste’s hold, hoping I could drag Kezia away, but unsure of how to do that without offending either of them. If I offended Celeste, she would be back. And soon. If I offended Kezia… Well, I hoped she let me choose which flowers she used to suffocate me with.
“Celeste, I’m sorry, but I think we have to get going,” I said, as calmly as I could. To my surprise, it came out evenly. Despite the fact that I was a terrible liar. I’d gotten more people looking at me sideways when I lied than I could count.
Celeste pouted. “Ah, c’mon. The show just started. I bet you haven’t even had hors d’oeuvres. Or a nice glass of wine, have you Jasper?” She asked, leaning into my chest, with one hand flat against it. Kezia’s eyes narrowed.
“Sorry, Celeste,” I said. “We just can’t.”
She pouted even harder, but relented. “All right. I suppose if you have to go, you have to go. How ‘bout a kiss before you leave?” She asked, cocking her head to the side and grinning up at me with enough enticement that I felt a couple of the other men turning around to look at her.
I’m not much for wanting to do violence to others, but right then, I would have been perfectly fine putting her head through a pane of glass. I didn’t understand why she was acting this way, but more importantly, I didn’t get why she was doing it in public. She had dumped me. She remembered that little piece of our relationship right?
“No, Celeste,” I said, without bothering to conceal the irritated note in my voice. Normally, I would try to be kinder, but she was going too far. Blatantly ignoring Kezia, who was not only wearing my jacket, but hanging off my arm. Yes, Kezia wasn’t actually my date, but it looked like that. And Celeste was acting like the two of us were still madly in love—which we had never really been before—and that Kezia was the intruder.
Celeste stepped back. “Why not?” She asked. If her lower lip jutted out any further, she could have carried one of the hors d’oeuvres trays on it. “I haven’t done anything to upset you, have I?” Tears gathered on her lower lashes. It would have been more dramatic if she were wearing makeup that could get smeared, but it was plenty for the current crowd.
“Celeste,” I sounded put out even to my own ears.
My ex rose up on her tiptoes. “Just one kiss,” she said, in what was supposed to be a very small voice. She didn’t know that Kezia’s hearing was very, very good. “I’m sure she’ll forgive you just one, itty bitty kiss between old flames.”
Kezia had had enough.
There was an awful cracking, crunching sound, followed by the distinct noise of breaking wood. The large window by the front door shattered into a million pieces and a tree came crashing through the gallery. It managed to miss all the people who had been milling around the windows, only to come crashing down onto the floor. The tile under it screeched as branches scraped across their glossy surface.
Branches shot out of the top of the tree and impaled some of the paintings, ripping through the canvas like it was tissue paper. Those branches grew to the ceiling, taking the paintings with them. They punched through the ceiling, cracking it loudly. Everyone stared for a heartbeat.
Then the screaming started. People ran towards the doors, only they weren’t moving with any kind of coordination. Some of them tripped over the tree, while others got tangled in the branches and a few of them stopped to take their phones out for some really awesome videos.
And Kezia wasn’t done.
Vines punched through the floor, snatching more paintings off the walls and the easels where they were resting. Several of them cracked in half and others got lost in the vines. There was more breaking, as those vines took care of the paintings. One long, thick vine slithered across the floor. I watched it approach us, wrap around Celeste’s ankle and haul.
If she weren’t wearing six-inch high heels, she might have had a chance. A very small chance. Instead, her ankle bent dramatically to the side and she screamed in shock. She reached for me, only to find that I was a few feet from where she had thought I was. Celeste hit the ground and was dragged towards the tree. She found that the branches were surprisingly difficult to break free of, though she tried with everything she had. She ended up getting scratched to hell and screaming.
Within minutes, the entire place was covered in foliage, with the giant tree still sitting in the middle of the room. All the patrons had run out the doors, minus us Seers and the demigods. Well and Celeste of course.
“What’s happening!?” She screamed from her little prison.
Juniper and Jasmine picked their way over to us. They stopped in front of me, staring at Celeste. “That…” Jasmine said. “Is the best thing I’ve seen all fucking year. Can you do it again?” She beamed at Kezia. “I can point you in the direction of some other douches that really should be put in a little prison.” She spoke quietly enough that only we could hear her. Not that Celeste was paying much attention, sobbing in her little cage and screaming.
“Sure…?” Kezia said, the sentence coming out like a question.
Juniper looked at Kezia. “You are indeed amazing and everything, but how are we supposed to explain this to police?”
“No problem,” Zander said with a grin. “Kizzy, you mind cleaning up?”
Kezia shrugged. The vines st
arted to disappear into the floor again and the tree branches removed themselves from the ceiling. I noted, however, that Celeste’s little prison didn’t release her. I was wondering if Kezia was going to leave her there for the police to break out. It took half the time, cleaning up, then it had taken to make the mess. Kezia left the tree—because how were we supposed to make an entire group of people forget a tree came crashing through a big window—but took care of everything else.
She left Celeste locked in her prison.
We decided it was probably best that we left before law enforcement got involved. There’s nothing suspicious about us. We look human and three of us are human. Yet, it’s never a good thing for a demigod to bring attention to themselves. So, Zander Charmed people into forgetting about us, we climbed into our separate cars and started for home.
Once there, my sisters hightailed it upstairs, where they could change into something more comfortable. Zander did the same thing, leaving Kezia and I to linger in the living room.
She shuffled her feet. “You aren’t mad at me are you?”
I smiled and then I grinned. “No. I think you’re amazing.”
12: I’ve got 99 Problems and a Bitch is Only Half of Them
Kezia
Yeah, I was blushing again. I wish I had some control over that. But I didn’t, so I just went to sit on the couch. Jasper joined me, sitting right next to me and I didn’t even want to move away. I took my shoes off and I was entirely comfortable.
I got the jacket off and held it on my lap, crossed my legs and looked over at Jasper. “How long do you think it took them to get her out?”
Jasper smiled. “I’m not sure she’s out yet. You do good work.”
I turned and my elbow was on the top of the couch while my cheek was against my palm. “Thank you. I hope her nights are filled with Swamp Thing nightmares.”
