“So beautiful,” she murmurs.
I turn to Ben. “Now yours.” I slide the ring on his left finger.
“And yours,” he says, sliding his chosen ring on my hand. We both look at Georgie who slides her rings first on my hand and then on Ben’s.
We each take a moment to stare at our hands, two rings each on our ring fingers. Georgie looks up. “Do we have to go to the party? I just want you boys to take me to bed.”
I chuckle. “We have to go, but we’ll be up all night long making love. I promise.”
“How are we doing this now?” Ben asks. “She’s not our girlfriend anymore. She’s our fiancée.”
“I say we just do this. She’s our fiancée and the three of us are in a committed and loving threesome.” We pull ourselves off the floor, kissing each other, before Georgie goes to freshen her makeup.
Ben glances down at his hand. “I can’t believe it. Every dream that just a few months ago I never thought I could have is coming true. I get the girl and the guy.”
I pull him into my arms, kissing him before nuzzling his neck. “We are extremely fortunate people. Now for the rest of our lives, we have no more decisions to make about who to love or how to love. All we have to do now is get on with loving each other.”
Georgie comes back in the room and squeezes between us, putting her arms around us. “Can we go apartment hunting this weekend? I love that we all hang out in my place most of the time, but I want us to have an our place. Some place we all picked out together and make it a home we can love in.” She smiles. “Together.”
I pinch her chin. “We can definitely do that.”
She rises up on her toes and kisses me, then shifts to Ben and kisses him. “Alright boys, let’s go give them something to talk about.”
“Are you sure you can handle the whispers and stares?” Ben asks.
“I don’t give a damn. If anyone says anything to my face, I already know exactly what I’ll say.”
I smile. “And what’s that, love?”
She grins. “I’ll tell them to eat their cake and I’ll eat mine.”
“Sounds good to me, gorgeous” Ben says. “Are we ready for our public debut as a permanent threesome?”
I nod, shifting my glance between the two people I love. “We’re ready.”
Chapter 47 Georgie
I look up when my coworker pops in my doorway. “Hey, Georgie. You have a delivery.”
I crinkle my brow. “A delivery?”
“Yep. It’s at the front desk.”
“Why are you telling me?”
Lisa shrugs with a grin on her face. “You’ll see.”
I stand slowly, filled with curiosity. I have no idea why the front desk didn’t just call me. When I step out of my office and approach the lobby, I pause when I hear familiar voices. I walk out and smile when I see Ben and Luc.
“Boys! What are you doing here?”
Luc flashes that sexy grin as he saunters over to me and wraps his arms around my waist. “We have a surprise for you, love. A big surprise.”
My eyes shift to Ben, who nods. “A really big surprise.”
I bounce on my toes. “Well, what is it?”
Luc winks at Ben. “You’ll see, but you’re leaving for the day.”
“Right now? I can’t. I have work, and I need to tell my boss and—”
“It’s been handled,” Lisa says from behind me. “I got it covered until Monday.”
“Seriously?”
She nods. “Happy birthday.”
“Wow. This is so nice. What are we doing?”
“Well,” Luc says, nuzzling my neck. “It’s our three month anniversary from when got engaged.”
He looks at Ben, who tangles his fingers in mine. “And your birthday is on Sunday, so we decided we needed to celebrate big time.”
I smile, filled with love and affection. “Are you going to tell me?”
“Yes,” Luc says. “We’re going to a Bed and Breakfast in the Wine Country. We’ll be there until Sunday afternoon touring wineries, eating great food, and enjoying each other.” He cups my chin. “You’ve been working so much, we thought you could use the break.”
“It sounds wonderful. Really.”
“You sound hesitant,” Ben says. “You okay?”
“Definitely. It’ll be good for us.” For me. They lead me out to a car and help me into the back seat. I’m nestled between them as I always am, but I feel like I should admit what’s weighing on me. “Um, guys?” They both look at me. “This is the most serious, longest lasting relationship I’ve ever had.”
“Same,” Ben says.
“Yes,” Luc adds.
I nod. “I’m, um, sorry I’ve been working a lot. Sometimes…” I pause, knowing I can’t say the words. I can’t tell them that even though I’m overwhelmed with happiness, sometimes the urge to fuck it all up haunts me. I’m terrified of losing them, but I have no experience to keep them. I’m not good at love. I’m failing them.
“What’s wrong, love?” I look up into Luc’s warm eyes. “Are you unhappy?”
“Are you?”
“Unhappy?” I nod. “God no. I’ve never been happier in my life. I know Ben feels the same. Have we done something wrong?”
I shake my head. “No. You’re both perfect. Absolutely perfect.”
“So are you, gorgeous,” Ben says, brushing my hair from my shoulder. “Perfect for us in every way. You want to spend the weekend with us, don’t you?”
“Very much so.” I smile. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
“Good.” Ben leans in and kisses me softly.
“If you ever need to talk, just say so,” Luc says. “We’ll listen.”
“I know.”
“Is there anything you want to say now?” he asks.
Gazing into the eyes of these beautiful men, I shake my head, knowing I have to battle these demons on my own. “No.”
∞∞∞
Two months after our amazing weekend in Napa, I zip the suitcase closed, glancing around to make sure I’ve packed everything I need for three whole weeks away. This is it- the opportunity to take my career to the next level, but the first time away from my boys since we decided to make it a lifelong commitment. A smile pulls at my lips, knowing they’ll fuck like rabbits while I’m gone. They don’t know that I know how often they engage without me. The baths on Sunday night while I sit in my office prepping for the week or the soft hum of intimate whispers and playful teasing emanating from the bathroom while I sit on the bed listening to them like a favorite song. The morning kisses and nuzzles and blow jobs. The lunchtime shag, as Luc calls it, hidden away in an office- so scandalous and delicious as they risk being caught. They think I don’t know, but I do. I know and I love it, but…
My thoughts are interrupted when both of them enter the bedroom.
Ben comes up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. “All ready, gorgeous?”
“I think so.”
Luc sits on the edge of the bed, taking my hand in his. “Still nervous?”
I smile. “Getting better. I can do this.”
Luc nods. “Of course you can, love. It’s a beautiful opportunity for you.”
“I agree,” Ben says, moving next to Luc. “Head of Corporate Training is a big step up in the food chain.”
I nod, smiling. “It will increase my travel until the office is up and running.”
“But it’s a great city,” Ben says. “And Ryan can’t wait to be your tour guide.”
“Very sweet of him.”
“A friend, or lover, of Ben’s is a friend of his,” Luc says, smiling. “At least we know he won’t seduce you now that he’s decided he’s blokes only.”
“He wouldn’t anyway,” Ben says. “Too much respect for us.”
Shaking my head, I smile. “I’m not worried about it. It’ll just be nice to have somewhat of a friend there. It’s nearly a month away from you both.”
Luc kisses the back of
my hand. “Just focus on the end goal. We’ll be here ready to celebrate with you, and of course we’ll pop up on the weekends.”
I cup his chin, playing with the soft hair that lives there. “But I will miss you both.”
“We’ll miss you too.”
Ben nods, his eyes softening. “Definitely.”
I exhale, pulling the suitcase from the bed, letting go when Luc takes over for me. “My dad and mom called last night to confirm they’re coming to our get together next month.”
“And how does that make you feel?” Luc asks.
“Nervous. My mom is just not going to get it. Not sure what dad will do, but not as concerned with him. Paul will think it’s a phase. That’s his coping mechanism for things that make him uncomfortable.”
Ben nods. “My parents will shit but will act calm in front of your families. Then quietly pull me aside and throw holy water on me.”
Luc chuckles. “I’m expecting a similar response, but they won’t pull me aside. They’ll throw holy water on all of us.”
“To be fair, it’s unusual,” Ben says. “We’d probably all have similar shocked reactions if it wasn’t us.”
I nod. “I think we would. I mean, I would totes ask to watch first.” We all laugh. “But yeah it will take the people we love some time to process it.”
“The commitment should help,” Ben says. “We’re not just fucking around. We’re serious.”
I study his face for a moment. “Right. We’re serious.”
“Oh, by the way, Georgie,” Ben says. “The realtor called to check if we’ve made any decisions.”
I bite my bottom lip. “I’ve been so busy with work. I promise we’ll focus on it when I get back.”
He nods, exchanging glances with Luc. “Okay, babe.”
Luc smiles. “Right then. Ready to go to the airport, love?”
I smile, nodding. “Ready.”
∞∞∞
Later that evening, sitting on the edge of my hotel room bed, I glance around. This is home for the next three weeks. It should feel foreign, but it feels the same as the home I left in LA. The home I bought alone but is now filled with two gods among men, two passionately loving and sexual beings who try to create normalcy where it doesn’t exist. Two men, who although claiming daily to love and desire me, more and more have eyes only for each other. They don’t notice it yet, but I do. For so long Ben worried about being the odd man out, but he’s the center of it all.
Lying back, I kick off my shoes as my eyes absorb the city view outside my window. Months of apartment hunting, but I can’t make a decision. Working later than necessary so they would have dinner without me, coming home to find them together on the couch watching TV and talking about their work, pure joy in their eyes. Looking up at my entrance, welcoming and warm, inviting me to join them, but me not wanting to. Me, not jealous of their bond. Me, wanting my space back. I’m pulling away, but why?
How does a woman like me know if the relationship is broken, or if she is? Is it my repeated pattern of sabotaging happiness, or is it really what it feels like? I lift my left hand, gazing at the two diamond rings competing for space on my finger, like I compete for space in Luc and Ben’s love. They love me, yes, I believe this, but I don’t think it’s the kind of love where people get married or make lifelong commitments. It felt like it, to all of us, but as much as it pulls at my heart to think of letting them go, staying seems worse. Would they even notice? I shake my head as a tear snakes down my cheek. Of course they would. They’ve convinced themselves that I’m a pivotal member of this arrangement, but was I ever? Maybe to Luc once, but to Ben, I was always a vehicle. His ‘I love you’ comes tinged with friendship, his kiss slightly chaste, his lovemaking a show for Luc. I exhale slowly. Luc’s declarations of love are closer to romance but more and more I feel his heart gravitating to Ben, leaving only his body for me. My own I love you’s come less and less, feeling detached from my heart. I do love them though. I know I do, so why, why am I crying? Why am I imagining returning to my life before they entered it? Why do I want them to go?
My phone rings, startling me from my thoughts. I dig it out of my handbag and answer.
“Hello?”
“Georgie? It’s Ryan, Ben’s friend.”
“Oh, hi, Ryan. How are you?”
“Wonderful. Did you make it to your hotel?”
“I did.”
“That’s good. I thought I’d check in and see if you were up for dinner or if you want to plan another time to get together.”
I let his question hang for a second. If I say no, I’ll lie here all night drowning in thoughts of home, but his connection to Ben guarantees he’ll be a topic of conversation.
“I mean, if you’re not up for it…” Ryan interjects.
“Oh, sorry, Ryan, um, you know what I’d love to go to dinner. It’ll be good for me to get out.”
“Perfect. Is an hour enough time to get ready? There’s an amazing Italian restaurant inside your hotel.”
“An hour works. I’ll meet you in the lobby?”
“Sounds great.”
“See you soon.”
“Yep, bye, Georgie.”
I hang up and a second later get a text from him with a picture.
So you know who you’re eating with, the text says.
He’s freaking gorgeous, making it easy to understand how he got Ben’s attention, even from Luc. Sparkling blue eyes, similar to Ben’s, gaze back at me from the screen. His dark hair, wavy and short, looks soft to the touch, like he just wakes up looking like that. Maybe he does. Ben knows. Ben knows what he kisses like, what he feels like, what he tastes like. Ben knows.
Will we talk about the weeks he spent in Ben’s arms, hoping that beautiful man could love him, could leave his life in LA behind, embrace his love of dick? Will Ryan ask me questions about how our love works? Will he want to know if Ben goes down on me, or how often he takes Luc’s dick in his ass? Will he want to know? Does he love Ben? Will he want to know if I do? Will I tell him if he does?
I pull myself up and walk into the bathroom to freshen up. As I brush my teeth, I lean against the marble countertop, noticing the distance in my eyes. I could turn to Sophie, but she’ll just tell me it wasn’t sustainable. You can’t love two men at the same time, she’ll say, but I don’t think that’s true. I believe you can. I know you can. I just don’t think you should love two men who love each other so much, they can’t love you anymore.
After brushing my hair and changing into a fresh outfit of jeans, knee-high boots, and a cashmere sweater, I sit in the armchair in front of the picture window and text the boys.
Made it to SF. About to meet Ryan for dinner.
I end it with a kiss emoji. They’re probably already at dinner or cuddling on the couch making out. A response comes quickly.
We miss you, gorgeous girl! Tell Ryan we said hi and call when you get back to your room. Love, your boys.
I read it twice, feeling pings of regret and guilt in me for questioning their love, but I know it’s different in person. It’s easy to tell someone you love them on the phone, but showing it consistently is another thing all together. It’s not their fault. How you love someone is just how you love. We still talk of weddings and decorating our new house and celebrating holidays with our families. We joke about the mechanics of threesomes when we’re old. We laugh and enjoy each other’s company. It’s just different now.
When it’s time, I exit my hotel room and take the elevator to the lobby, glancing around for Ryan. I see him standing near a pillar and he waves to me. When I reach him, I extend my hand. “Georgie.”
He nods. “Ryan. Nice to meet you in person.”
“You too.”
“Restaurant’s right over here to our left. I already checked and they do have some tables open.”
“Great. I’m pretty hungry.”
“Yeah, me too.” He flashes a big smile as we enter the restaurant. Definitely hot.
We’re seate
d and after studying the menu for a few minutes, I sit back in my seat, waiting for the topic to come up.
Ryan gazes up at me. “Wine drinker?”
“Yes. You?”
“Definitely. Red or white? I’ll order a bottle.”
“Whichever you prefer.”
He nods and when the server arrives, he orders a bottle of Pinot Noir.
“Are you into wine, Ryan?”
He nods. “I am. I took an interest in it a couple of years ago when I went on a tour of the wine country.”
“I don’t know much about it, but Luc does. I’ve expanded my interests since hanging around him.”
Ryan nods, smiling. “I find the reds go with almost anything you eat in the winter. I lean white in the summer months.”
I smile. “Same as Luc.”
“Well the man must have good taste.”
I laugh. “He does.”
We pause as the wine is delivered and we order dinner, lobster ravioli for him and chicken marsala for me. Once the waiter is gone, Ryan leans slightly forward.
“So tell me about Georgie.”
“I’m sure you already know about me.”
“Not much, honestly. Just that you’re the woman who orchestrated a very unique arrangement.”
“That’s one way to put it.” I take a bigger gulp of my wine than I intended. “I’m, um, almost thirty. I’ve recently received an opportunity to kick off a new office here in San Fran. It’s basically the final step to being promoted to Director of Corporate Training, a goal I’ve had for a while now.” Ryan nods, watching me with sexy blue eyes. “I live with two incredible men.” I bite my bottom lip. “I guess that’s it.”
He tilts his head? “That’s it? What’s your favorite color? Food, song, or movie? What do you do to relax? Where would you love to travel to? What keeps you awake at night or lulls you to sleep? What’s your worst vice?”
I laugh softly. “Uh, that’s a lot of questions.”
“Just making the point that you have a lot of things about you you’re not sharing. You are more than just your job and who you love.”
The Thing About Us: A MMF Bisexual Romance Page 29
