by BJ Wane
The staff kept telling him her near comatose state was a blessing as she wasn’t suffering with either physical discomfort or the constant mental anguish of her lost memories. No, at this stage of her disease, he bore the weight of all the suffering on his shoulders, and he carried the burden as a fraction of his penance for not being a better son when she’d needed him to be. Crossing one ankle over his opposite knee, Zach leaned his head back and began talking, telling her of his week as if she could hear and understand everything he said.
When he got around to mentioning Sandie, even he heard the change in his voice; the irritation upon finding her, a hint of humor when he mentioned his little stowaway’s tenacity when determined to get what she wanted, namely, him, and even a twinge of fondness when he recounted the games she challenged him to.
“You’d probably like her, Mom. She didn’t put up with any of my crap, and we both know how much of that I have.”
Sadness returned when Zach wondered if Carol had dated much after his father left. Closing his eyes, he remembered a high-school girl coming to their small apartment on occasion, staying with him when he’d been grade-school age and his mother had gone out for a few hours. But she’d always returned in time to put him to bed, and for some reason, that added to his sorrow. He didn’t like to believe she’d sacrificed a chance at another relationship because of him.
Opening his eyes, he started to rise then stopped short upon seeing his mother’s bright blue gaze riveted on him. The slow outstretch of her hand toward him coincided with a brief flash of clarity and small smile tilting the corners of her mouth. “Mom?” He held his breath, but she just closed her eyes with a small sigh, leaving her hand lying palm-up toward him. A lump lodged in his throat as tears blurred his vision. Squeezing her hand, he whispered, “Thanks, Mom. I’ll be back. Hang in there.”
Zach exited the home, stood a moment to inhale a deep breath of hot, muggy air and bask in the light-heartedness sweeping his senses. Usually, he disliked the sultry heat of late August unless he was enjoying a day on the ocean with its cool breezes, but right now he found it easy to like the afternoon temperature regardless of the stifling air. Deep down, he knew that too brief, special moment didn’t herald a change in Carol’s condition, but, damn it, he’d take what he could get. For one second, his mother had not only recognized him, but had shown pleasure in his presence, and that alone was worth everything.
Chapter 9
A low, impressed whistle drew Zach’s attention away from uncoiling the thick hemp from the dock anchor. Glancing up from his squat position, he smiled at the Carlson brothers’ appreciative gazes.
“How do you like her?” Rising, he strolled over the wood planked dock to greet Troy and Trevor, their identical, dark brown eyes surveying his yacht from bow to stern.
“Hell, what’s there not to like. She’s gorgeous.” Zach had heard that same, reverent tone from Trevor when admiring a woman. The guy loved anything depicted by a female pronoun, it seemed.
“You just had to go bigger, sleeker, and likely faster, didn’t you?” Troy asked, settling his fists on his hips.
“Of course. What’s the point of trading in if you’re not going to be trading up? You’re the first to arrive. Climb aboard and I’ll give the guided tour when Sean, Miles and Jackson get here.” Nodding down the pier, Zach added, “Here come’s Sean now.”
The three of them waited for the psychologist to walk close enough to notice the new replacement of his previous yacht. The sardonic curl of one side of Sean’s mouth told Zach the exact moment Sean noticed the switch.
“Only you.”
His dry tone belied the spark of humor glinting in the grey eyes he turned toward Zach. “Wait until you check out the added accoutrements. You’ll really be impressed then.”
Zach pivoted away from his friends for a moment, hiding his frown when the image of Sandie’s face popped into his mind, the neutral tone of her voice filling his head. Don’t you get bored spending your days counting your money and playing with the toys it’s enabled you to buy? He cringed inwardly as he recalled his callous reply of ‘hell no’ that had brought amusement to her face. He remembered thinking he would’ve found dealing with her censure easier than mirth at his expense.
“The ‘tie me up and spank me’ kind of extras?” Trevor asked on a hopeful note.
“Of course. Did you expect something else?” he answered, facing them again.
“Not from you. There’s Miles and Jackson. Just in time, now that you’ve aroused our curiosity,” Troy said.
They all looked to Jackson when he arrived and scrutinized the mega-yacht with a discerning look. Of the seven of them, he was the least fond of the water. Zach was hoping the larger vessel would bring him aboard more often than the smaller yacht he’d had before. “She’s about fifty feet longer, couple yards wider with three levels, sleeps fourteen without crowding, more if anyone wants to add an extra to their berth for the night.” He spoke to all of them, but his eyes sought out Sean who favored threesomes.
“Thought of everything, have you?” Sean said as he leapt aboard, his shrewd, shrink’s eyes on Jackson. Shaking his head, Zach wondered if the psych doc would ever get over his penchant for watching over all of them with the eagle eyes of a hawk.
“I tried to. Come on, I’ll give you a quick tour before I get us underway. I stopped at Joe’s Meat Market and picked up dinner, but there are snacks until then.”
“Food’s always good,” Miles commented as he brought up the rear boarding.
“I worry about you, bro.” Jackson shook his head, drawing grins from everyone as he shifted back away from the rail. The Carlson brothers were the ones who started calling each of them bro, but it hadn’t taken long for the rest, who didn’t have siblings, to toss about the nickname. “There’s something seriously wrong with a guy who thinks about food more than sex.”
Zach chuckled along with the others before slapping Miles on his broad back. “Follow me, and we’ll start at the top and work our way down.”
Leading them down the port side to the spiral stairs winding to the top deck, he heard Trevor snicker, “That’s how I like to go about it.”
Ten minutes later, after taking them to the bow and pointing out the fountain, hot tub and specially designed lounges, he leaned against the rail and observed his friends as they tossed out comments of pleasurable surprise or lewd observations. He didn’t need to show them the D rings attached in strategic places on the mermaid fountain as they had no trouble spotting them, and there were several suggestions on positions the metal loops would come in handy to maintain.
Trevor ran a finger over the mermaid’s clamped nipple with an exaggerated sigh of lust. “God, she’s hot.”
Troy shot his brother a dry look. “You’re a sick fuck.”
“Yeah, but everyone loves me.”
Zach chuckled along with the others, none of them denying Trevor’s statement. The hot tub was a hit, as he’d known it would be, as were the stashed chain stations along the starboard and port sides and cuffed legs on the lounges. Then Troy and Miles took an interest in the skeet shooting while Sean, Trevor and Jackson argued over shuffleboard, their minds switching gears from sex to fun and games without missing a beat.
“I’ll get us underway and finish the tour once we’re a few miles out. No skeet shooting until we’re away from the marina,” he warned.
Troy tossed an incredulous look his way followed by his sarcastic, “Hell, Vancuren, I am a cop, you know.”
“Just a friendly reminder.”
Even after over twenty years of close friendship, they never tired of sparring with each other and continued to have each other’s backs without hesitation or question. Zach wound his way down and took control at the helm, smiling as he heard their continued, friendly jousting. Starting the engine, he got them underway, finding it easier to maneuver the large vessel after the few days of experience in controlling the mega yacht last week. The only thing marring his pleasure wi
th having the guys aboard and their exuberant response to his surprise were the memories of those few days with Sandie that kept popping up.
He couldn’t figure out why he couldn’t forget her as easily as he had every woman who’d come before her. She’d irritated and pissed him off more than anyone else, which should have made it an easy task to put her out of his mind. But, as he’d strolled around the upper deck and pointed out all the added BDSM equipment, he couldn’t keep from remembering Sandie running around naked, laughing as he chased her, or the way she’d embraced being tormented, both on the lounge and secured at a chain station.
Worse was the guilt that kept creeping up whenever the memory of her flushed face and soft, startled gasp when she climaxed was replaced with an image of those wide green eyes filled with despairing dread. He gritted his teeth against the unwelcome reminder, but that didn’t prevent a low curse of frustration from slipping out just as Sean slid onto the co-captain’s seat next to him.
“Something one of us did or said?” he asked with a look as bland as his tone, neither of which fooled Zach.
“No. Why are you bothering me instead of having fun above deck?”
“Jackson’s already creamed Trevor and me in one game of shuffleboard. Since I prefer women who are gluttons for punishment and not myself, I decided to hang with you. Damn, but I never get tired of that view.”
Just a few miles away from the marina and an endless expanse of blue water and even bluer sky already surrounded them. “It’s peaceful, yet can also be intimidating.” Shrugging, he said, “Weird, huh?”
“Not really. There are a lot of things in life, I believe, that can have a calming influence, as long as you don’t lose sight of the risks. What, or who has you in such a pensive mood? Your mother?”
“Can’t you leave the shrink at home when we get together?” Zach’s small grin took the bite out of his disgruntled response before he told Sean about his mother’s brief moment of clarity, or what he perceived as a second of cognizant awareness. “I know it doesn’t mean anything, but I’ll take what I can get at this stage.”
“Don’t blame you. There’s not a one of us who doesn’t wish we’d had more time with one or both of our parents. But you weren’t thinking about your mother when you were pointing out all the ways we could enjoy our time on your new toy here.”
“You know, bro, there are times we all hate that shrewd insight you have that goes along with your mind probing, over-protective tendencies.” Shutting off the engine, he swiveled to face Sean, debating between how much he wanted to tell with how much he wanted to keep to himself until he figured out why the hell those few days were mattering more than they should. “There’s just no keeping shit from you, is there?”
Sean’s grey gaze never wavered from Zach’s annoyed glare, which didn’t surprise him. The calm, controlled one of the group, the psych doc’s patience could be both soothing as well as downright provoking. “Just curious, is all. I wasn’t the only one who noticed how your mind seemed to wander as we walked around, which isn’t like you.”
He left it at that, waiting for him to decide what, if anything he wanted to say. If he’d pushed, Zach’s tendency would’ve been to remain mute. They didn’t call him a stubborn ass for no reason. But Sean’s placid acceptance of whatever he decided to reveal, or not, already showed on his face, easing Zach’s tense annoyance enough for him to admit a portion of what continued to plague him.
“I had a surprise guest last week for what was supposed to be my solo cruise. She turned out to be a fun surprise, but left without a word, which is how I like it,” he ended on a defensive note.
“When you’re ready, you’ll have to tell us about her. It’s not a big deal, Zach, if you can’t forget this woman. Hook up with her again, just to test the waters one more time. You know what they say, there’s someone out there for everyone.”
Zach snorted, his lips curling as he scoffed, “I’m no more interested in settling down than you are.” The bleak look that flashed in Sean’s eyes took him by surprise. “You’re interested in a committed relationship? Since when?”
“Hey, I’m supposed to read you, not the other way around.” Turning his face to look out the window, he murmured in a low voice, “Besides, what I want would be impossible to find.”
After Zach, Sean came up next for stubbornness and he recognized the obstinate set to his rigid jaw. “Well, impossible things have been known to happen,” he told him, thinking of his stowaway and how she’d managed to get what she wanted from him. “Come on. I’ll show you the bunks then you can help me haul up the food for dinner. Unless Miles already found the galley and didn’t leave us with anything. In that case, I say we toss him overboard.”
“Works for me.”
Within fifteen minutes, the hunger inducing smell of grilled bratwursts and German sausages permeated the air around the outdoor kitchen, the table already laden with buckets of potato salad and coleslaw Zach had picked up along with the meat. Miles downed a bag of chips before he’d even fired-up the grill and had started in on another one before Jackson snatched it from him. As they mingled around the outdoor kitchen, pleased he only banned alcohol when they were indulging themselves during a play party, Zach enjoyed the easy banter with his friends. He’d needed this, a few hours of uncomplicated time with people who knew his past, his failures and his self-indulgent tendencies and didn’t judge. They liked him just the way he was.
Sandie had seemed to like him also, he had to admit. When she’d called him an ass, she’d done so with humor, when she heard him admit to being a rich playboy, she hadn’t put him down or, worse, pried into his life with money-grabbing, ulterior motives. The only thing she’d wanted from him was sex. He didn’t understand why the hell that was beginning to grate, and wasn’t sure he wanted to.
“What do you think, Zach?”
Switching his gaze from the smoke-billowing grill and his thoughts away from his stowaway, he peered over at Jackson. “Sorry, I was concentrating on flipping. Think about what?”
He ignored their snorts of disbelief as Miles answered, “About planning a play party soon. Maybe an over-nighter.”
“Sure. Let me know when everyone can make it.” Maybe after he spent twenty-four hours fucking one of his regulars, he’d be able to forget a pair of wide, green eyes and one responsive, slim body. Piling the meat on a platter, he carried it over to the table and took a seat on the end. “Anybody hear from Dax, other than his weekly, group e-mail that tells us absolutely nothing?”
“Not me, and he’s still asking we don’t call as his down time is spent sleeping or on the road.” Sean’s face reflected concern for his best friend, but his resigned tone revealed what they all thought. Dax would return and/or talk to them when he was damn good and ready, and not before then.
“So, we’ll torment him with pictures of Zach’s new venue for our fucking pleasure and after our party, rub in everything he missed,” Jackson suggested without an ounce of noticeable guilt.
“You’re always nicer and more understanding of your animals than you are of people,” Troy accused him.
“Cause I like them better.”
Dry laughter echoed around the table as hands reached for the food and talk switched to sports. By the time they finished and cleaned up, Zach figured there was just enough daylight left to enjoy a few hands of poker in the gathering room and return to the marina before total darkness.
Entering the enclosed center of the yacht, Trevor strode across the room and ran a hand over the fold-down spanking bench’s padded, narrow center. “Fuck me sideways, I’ve never seen one of these.”
Gathering around the three benches lowered from the wall, the guys tossed out comments on the various bondage pieces, all of which they were familiar with except this bench. Situated between the other two, this piece was aptly labeled a fuck bench and rested on thin legs. Lying belly down on the horizontal pad, braced on the elbow and knee rests, a sub would find herself placed in a vulnerabl
e, wide-open, easily fuckable position.
“I think that’s what you’re supposed to do to the girl,” Miles responded, a rare hint of humor creeping into his deep voice.
“And I can’t wait. When are we doing this?” Trevor asked Zach.
“As you know, I can do anytime. You five coordinate and let me know. Ready for a game?” He strolled over to the closet next to the one Sandie had hid in and brought out three folding chairs to put around the pop-up table in front of the curved couch along the back wall. “We have about ninety minutes before I’d planned to head back.”
“Well, make it soon,” Jackson put in as he chose one of the folding chairs and Sean started dealing. “As you know, my fall adoption day fundraiser is coming up in October and prep is going to keep me busier than usual soon. I’m already over-crowded and in another two months, will be busting at the seams. I need this year to be my most successful.”
Surprise colored Troy’s voice as he exchanged two cards in his dealt hand for two new ones. “Didn’t those new kennels we put up take care of that problem?”
“Yes, but the constant drop offs at my gate have increased, damn it, and, so far, I haven’t figured out what to do about it.”
They’d all spent many hours at Jackson’s shelter and clinic and knew the location miles outside the city limits made it way too easy for uncaring pet owners to leave their unwanted animals tied to the gate, confident they’d be taken care of. No charities you donate time to? I thought all wealthy people got involved with pet projects, you know, to make them look good. Recalling Sandie’s curiosity about how he spent his time coupled with the mention of the guys pitching in to help erect the much-needed kennels Zach had been only too happy to pay for, taunted him with the fact he hadn’t pitched in with the manual labor. He knew his large donations to the rescue afforded Jackson the finances to hire help from college kids, which, in turn, granted him the time he needed to travel to farm animals in need of his veterinary services but were located too far to be driven in. But, in the years since Jackson had founded the shelter and clinic, Zach hadn’t put an ounce of sweat equity into his friend’s worthwhile project, unlike the rest of the gang.
