by Mel Gough
Maybe he should’ve taken Corey up on his offer after all. A bit of fooling around would put him to sleep. Or they could just watch some TV together. Corey would wrap his long legs around him and they’d curl up on the sofa, no questions asked. Jay reached into his pocket. Should he call him now?
Someone knocked on the door. Jay turned the TV off, frowning. Maybe Corey could read minds. The warmth of anticipation that flooded him was unexpected.
As soon as he opened the door, the warmth turned sour. His first instinct was to slam the door in the FBI’s face. The rage he’d tried to suppress since their altercation in the hallway bubbled under the surface. “What do you want?”
Carrie had never seemed afraid of him, but now she looked like she wanted to turn tail and run. She managed to stay put, but the tension rippled through her in waves. He stared her down but didn’t move. It hit him how small she was. Right now, the gun on her hip failed to make up for it.
She drew herself up, her expression set. “I came to tell you that I’ve decided not to fly back to Baltimore tonight.” She held her gaze steady, even though it clearly cost her. “I’ll continue working with Austin PD until we apprehend Sam Greene.”
Jay’s head spun. He hadn’t seen this coming. Another surge of anger gripped him. So now she wanted to be the hero.
Get a grip. What was wrong with him? This was what he’d wanted. She was putting her career on the line for them. His instinct was to refuse. Did he really want that on his conscience? Some rock band past their prime wasn’t worth her throwing away her life. Jay blinked. His temples ached. This was fucked up.
What had made her change her mind? At the end of the day she was just a cop, and cops didn’t give a fuck. But even as the thought crossed his mind he knew it wasn’t true for her. She hadn’t exactly acted like any other officer of the law he’d ever dealt with. Her concern about Lou when he’d fallen ill had been real. So was the shock on her face when she’d pulled her gun on those thugs at the meet-and-greet. And she’d slept with both of his band mates. That definitely wasn’t cop behavior.
He stepped aside. “Come in.”
Surprised, she needed a moment to follow suit. Inside, she turned to him. “I’m really sorry I d—”
As the door fell closed behind them, he took her face with both hands and kissed her.
For a moment, she froze and he thought he’d made a mistake. But then she leaned into the kiss, stepping closer so he didn’t have to bent at this awkward angle. She was so short, shorter even than Lou. Jay’s heart pounded.
They broke apart, panting. Jay asked, “You want this, right?”
She hesitated. He didn’t blame her, but his gut twisted with apprehension. At last, she gave a soft laugh. Her eyes shone. “I know how fucked up this is, but yeah, I really do.”
They kissed again, and for a few minutes that was enough. He breathed her in—a faint, no-nonsense soap smell overlaid with a busy day of running around. She tasted a little bit of coffee, and so good that Jay couldn’t understand why he hadn’t done this days ago.
Carrie might be small, but she was also fierce. She pushed him back, and he hit the door hard.
“Sorry.” She was breathless, and didn’t sound very sorry at all.
“’s okay.” He cupped her face and resumed the kiss. Her lips were so soft, and her face was smooth. He’d forgotten how different women felt. Her body, taut and strong, was still softer than Lou, who was all angles and bones. But the way she pressed against him belied all softness. Power rippled through her. And now that she was committed, she went ahead ferociously. Jay made a mental note never to stand between Carrie and something she really wanted. He put an arm around her waist and pressed closer. He needed to feel her.
She seemed to understand and ground against him as hard as she could. Her breasts were warm against his chest. Jay’s jeans grew tight.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her face hidden against his arm. For a heart-wrenching moment he was convinced she’d pull away. But instead, she continued, “I got scared. This case…” She shook her head, her soft hair brushing his chin. “I wasn’t even supposed to be here, but now… I can’t leave.” She was talking to herself as much as him, amazement and distress palpable.
He absorbed her words, and the sensation of her soft breath against his arm. “I know,” he said at last. His anger at her near-abandonment hadn’t disappeared, but it morphed into something insignificant. She was here now. That was what mattered. She’d come back to them, and things would be all right.
He stroked her back. It wasn’t sexual; he just wanted her to feel safe, and to know that he didn’t blame her. She sighed, looking up. “I’m so sorry about what happened to Lou.” The pain in her face was real.
Jay hugged her again. “He’ll be all right. The doctors said in a few days he’ll be good as new.” Jay’s brain had gone ’round and ’round his worries all day. He was exhausted—all he wanted was to forget, at least for a little while.
She pushed her hands into the space between his back and the door. Her hug reassured him, and for a moment her closeness was just comfort. But then she pressed her groin against his, and his hard-on, which had waned during the last few minutes, came alive again. He growled. “God, that feels good.”
She wriggled around. “Yeah?”
“Hmm.” He shifted. His pants were definitely too tight now. The urge to get her on the bed and take her grew unbearable. “Bedroom.”
He hesitated just a moment, then scooped her up. Maybe he was showing off. She’d been a pain in his ass, and maybe he wanted to show her who was boss, just a little bit. For a moment, she stiffened, unaccustomed to being overwhelmed like this. But then she seemed to decide that it was okay, and relaxed, softening in his arms and hanging there like a cat. Jay would be sure never to startle her. Making her do things she didn’t want to do seemed a surefire way to bring out her claws.
He put her back on her feet next to the bed. She raised an eyebrow.
“Dunno what came over me.” Heat crept up his face.
“You’re all right. Just don’t make it a habit.” Her lip curved in a smirk, but something else showed in her eyes. She glanced around. “This is weird.”
She’d been in here only last night. He’d not forgotten. The image of her uncovered breast as she lay next to Lou returned with full force. He followed her glance to the bed now tidily made. “Yeah, it’s weird.”
“Super weird.” She touched the bedspread on Lou’s side. “I hope he’ll really be okay.”
“Look, if it’s too much, I understand—”
“No!” Her gaze returned to him. There was dismay on her face. “I really want to.” She gnawed on her lip. “Corey and Lou, they both said it’s okay, but…is it a problem that I’ve been with them?”
“Corey too, huh?” He grinned. “Lou and I—”
“Yeah, yeah, you had a bet.” She slapped him lightly on the arm. “Weirdos.” Then her expression grew thoughtful. “This might be normal for you guys, but for me, it’s really not.” She looked more vulnerable at that admission than she ever had.
“I’ll be gentle. And to answer your question, no, it’s not a problem.” He pushed her hair back behind her ear. “Did Lou also tell you that we haven’t been with a woman in a long time?” She nodded and he tugged her into his arms. “Then you know that this is special.” He kissed her. “Congratulations, Agent McDonald, you made it past the vetting jury.”
She snorted but let him kiss her. The feel of her body brought a surge of longing. He wanted to rip both their clothes off, but he restrained himself. They had time. And he didn’t need to freak her out worse than the situation already had.
But he pushed under the silly silver shirt Phil had made her wear, searching for the bra clasp. She let him, and her hands went for his fly. She popped the buttons easily. He thought of her doing the same to Lou and Corey, and it made his dick swell. “Hmm, yeah.”
She cupped him through the pants, and he pushed int
o the sensation. Her hand tightened, and his erection hardened.
He tugged on her shirt and she pulled it over her head. He let his eyes glide down her body. With a raised eyebrow, she let the unclasped bra drop from her shoulders. Her breasts felt like he’d imagined after catching a glimpse the previous night. Supple but firm, fitting into his hands perfectly. He’d never much thought about breasts, but that would change now. He bit his lip, stroking the nipples he’d been thinking about all day.
Her breath hitched. She grinned, self-conscious. “There’s no sexy way of taking off the boots.” She sat on the bed and undid the laces. He pulled his shirt over his head. When he emerged, she was taking off her holster. She knelt and pushed it under the bed. He guessed she’d kept it there the night before, too.
Carrie straightened up. “Where were we?”
Jay stepped out of his boots. They were soft leather, fashioned after cowboy boots but a lot less sturdy. Corey had introduced him to them. They were comfortable and a lot easier to take off than Carrie’s military-style footwear.
He pushed down his pants and she copied him. Soon they were both naked. She studied him, gnawing on her lip. An approving smirk told him that she liked what she saw. The sentiment was mutual. He stepped closer, letting his fingers glide over faint stretch marks on her otherwise taut belly. He admired her wide hips, her strong thighs. She kept herself in excellent shape. Jay’s dick twitched. He’d moved close enough for it to brush her hip. A satisfied expression crossed her face. “I know where the rubbers are.”
Jay glanced at their goodie box. Lou, of course. Poor kid. He grinned. “Bet he freaked about the weed.”
She chuckled. “A little.” She indicated the box. “You get one.” She climbed onto the bed.
There was only a small baggy of weed in the box—they didn’t smoke much—but Jay stowed her reaction for future reference. Don’t rub in any transgressions of the law. He got it. Whatever his opinion of law enforcement, it was her chosen career. She loved her job, and he admired her principles.
She had stretched out on the bed, looking comfortable. If the memory of having spent the night here with Lou still bothered her, she wasn’t letting on. He knelt on the mattress, holding out the condom. “Wanna do the honors?”
Carrie took the rubber without hesitation. Jay lay down next to her. He enjoyed this bit. Having someone else roll a rubber on him made him excited for things to come. He loved Lou, and sex with him was amazing. Having Corey back in the bedroom made it even more so. But this was a different kind of exciting. Jay hadn’t realized until now, but he’d missed making love to a woman.
When the rubber was on, Jay nudged her. “Lie on your side.” She threw him a nervous glance. “Don’t worry. No funny business.” The thought of some backdoor action excited him, but he could have that with the guys. He guided her in position, pushing her top leg forward. She was still a little stiff, but didn’t resist.
To reassure her that he knew where to put it, and because he had to feel her, he slipped two fingers into her pussy, massaging her amazing ass with the other hand. She gasped, and when the surprise wore off, she bore down.
His dick twitched again. “You like that?”
“God, yeah.” She threw him a glance over her shoulder, her eyes like an endless emerald lake. “Fuck me, Jay.”
The growl that shivered in her voice drove him crazy. He pulled his fingers from her slick, hot place and lined up his dick instead. She inhaled sharply as he entered her, and began rocking her hips.
He savored the sensation. The warm wetness enveloping his dick was curiously freeing. He loved Lou’s tight hole, entering him slowly and waiting for his body to grip his dick and take his whole length. But not having to wait for another’s discomfort to pass was a nice change. The lack of friction took some getting used to, but as they sped up, she made noises, small and restrained at first, then louder and faster, and he was sure he’d burst with longing.
He slapped her ass a couple of times, then moved his hand to the front. Pushing through her bush, he stuck his fingers between her labia and found her clit. As he started massaging it, her cries became desperate.
Wordlessly, she guided his hand so that his index finger was half an inch to the left. Jay grinned. Here was someone who was used to getting what she wanted, everywhere. “You close?” he murmured in her ear.
“Hmm.” Lying on her side restricted her movements, but she arced her back, pushing her ass against him. He took that as his cue. Pressing his finger down harder on the little nub of her clit, he pounded into her. His own peak began to fizzle and crack at the base of his spine.
She growled and, distractedly, he was reminded of a cat getting ready to pounce on a small prey animal.
Carrie put her hand on top of his between her legs and, with a small cry, tipped over the edge. She pulsed under his fingers as she tightened around him, and then he was coming, spasms traveling up and down his body.
She fell back against him, breathing hard. “Wow.” She chuckled.
“What is it?” It was difficult to focus through the haze of his endorphins.
“Three orgasms in three days.” She sighed happily. His dick slipped out as she turned around. With a gentle, astonished expression she stroked his face. “I never knew I had such a strong sex drive.”
They cleaned up and got back into bed. Jay had wondered if she’d leave, but she came back from the bathroom and slipped under the covers as if that was the natural place for her to be. Lou was a cuddler, and over the years, Jay had come to appreciate post-coital quality time. He tugged her close, and she nestled against him with a contented sigh.
“Why did the band break up?” Her voice ended the long, drowsy silence. “I mean, you seemed to be flying really high at the time. Awards and sold-out venues everywhere.”
The question startled Jay. Why did she ask it now? His gut clenched. Had this whole night been a ruse to get him to trust her more? He hated himself for the thought. She didn’t need to sleep with him to get him to tell her shit. And the band’s break-up wasn’t related to Barry’s death.
He decided to answer. “After Danny died, I was in shock. I kept going, but it was on autopilot most of the time. Barry and Corey kept the business side ticking over.” He swallowed. Thinking about those months was still hard. “All the songs for our debut album were written, we’d just started recording. We managed to finish the album. I barely remember the time in the studio. The record hit everything out of the park. Our singles had done well, but the album, just, bam!” It still unsettled him all these years later, how life had changed seemingly overnight. “Barry had wanted us to go on tour, and with how well it was going he had no problem setting it up. For about a year, we were on the road. Barry kept adding dates, and bigger and bigger venues were selling out.”
“Sounds like you did the right thing, both as a coping mechanism and for your careers.” Carrie’s voice was gentle. No trace of her hard-edged interrogation persona was in evidence now.
“Yes and no, I guess. We finished the tour all right, but after that… things were starting to fray around the edges. Corey was drinking too much, Lou was sick with the vertigo more and more frequently, and I was a pain to be around. We didn’t have a falling-out, but one day we decided we needed a break.” He sighed. “I remember, we were in L.A. Different hotel from where Danny… well…I hate that city. Anyway, we finished the TV appearances that were already booked, a couple of benefit gigs and photo shoots, then went back home. There was talk of getting back together a few times to make a second album, but it never amounted to much.”
“Why did it finally go ahead?”
Jay grinned, despite himself. “Barry. He had a way of wearing you down. I’m only kidding, or mostly, anyway. We were ready. I couldn’t wait to get away from the city. One more photo shoot—” He mock-punched the comforter.
“Photo shoot?” Carrie sounded puzzled.
“I do a bit of modeling.” Heat crept up his face. He glanced down at
her. “Don’t mock me, okay? It pays the bills.”
“I wasn’t planning to.” She met his gaze. “You’re gorgeous.” She blushed, too. “The fashion world must be banging down your door.”
“Thanks.”
Maybe she felt him squirming because she changed the topic. “What do the others do?”
“Corey has a record label. He mostly signs fresh new bands.” He grinned. “He’s on that talent show on TV, as a judge.”
“I don’t watch much TV.”
“I didn’t think you would be. Corey brought us the Insects, too. He really enjoys that stuff.”
“What about Lou?”
Guilt stabbed Jay’s heart. Poor dude was all alone in the hospital while he got to spend the night with Carrie. “He writes poetry. He’s had two volumes out already. His stuff’s amazing.”
“I can imagine. His lyrics are beautiful.”
“He and Danny shared that talent.” Another stab through his heart. He rubbed his face. “Anyway, Lou’s also working on a play right now. It’s going to be performed next year. Off-Broadway—” A yawn cut him off.
Carrie lifted her head and looked at the radio clock on the bedside table. “Jeez, look at the time! You had a killer day. Time for sleep!”
Jay didn’t argue. He reached out and clicked the bedside light off. Carrie hummed and nuzzled closer. Jay smiled. He was about to tell her how glad he was with the unexpected turn the evening had taken, but before he could form the sentence, sleep carried him off.
The phone woke Jay hours later, and at first he had no idea where he was. It felt like he’d only closed his eyes a moment ago.
His cell was going crazy somewhere on the floor, and he couldn’t understand why it was down there. He turned over, his hand brushing Carrie’s warm skin.
Where was that phone? He leaned out of bed, feeling around the jumble of clothes. He found his pants and wrestled the phone free from the folds. Sitting on the side of the bed he squinted at the screen. He didn’t recognize the number.
