Gabe was silent longer than Eddie liked. “You go an awfully long way to hide it.”
“Not because I’m ashamed of it.”
“No?”
“Of course not.” Eddie got up and stalked to the door to look out into the hall. “After all these years you have to ask me that?”
“Maybe I do, since you hid the fact that you’re dyslexic from the guy you’re dating.”
“I did no such thing. I didn’t hide it.”
“Why didn’t you tell him then? I mean before the big reveal at his dad’s place.”
“Why? I don’t know why.”
“Why don’t you use your reading pen in restaurants? Why do you do that elaborate thing every morning with the color-coded schedules?”
Eddie turned. “I do my job in the way that suits me best. Isn’t that what I’m supposed to do? Adapt? What is wrong with that?”
“Maybe to someone from the outside, someone who doesn’t know you, it looks like you’re hiding the fact that you can’t read.”
“I can read,” Eddie practically shouted. “Just not the way you do, and big fucking deal. If I get the information I need, who the hell cares how I get it.”
“You do,” Gabe said softly. “Obviously.”
Whatever animated Eddie suddenly left him standing there heartsick—worn out with shock.
“Can that be true?” He returned to his desk and sat down. Picked up his OCR pen. Put it down again. “Am I still that kid?”
Gabe leaned forward. “I think we’re all the things we ever were, all bound up like dollar bills in a wad of cash with a rubber band around it. Somewhere inside, you’re waiting for everyone to call you ‘short bus’ again.”
“Fuck you.” Eddie threw his pen at Gabe, who caught it neatly.
“Careful, that’s a spendy toy.”
“I am not embarrassed by my learning disability.”
“You weren’t, until you started dating Andrew. Is it because he’s a teacher? Do you think he’ll hold you to a higher standard?”
Eddie shrugged. “You saw his dad’s place. They live for books. Everyone he knows is all eruditer than thou…”
“But it’s like you said, you can read. You’re not some dancing bear, Eddie. You’re a savvy guy. What did you think he was going to say?”
“I don’t know. I guess I thought he’d say we had nothing in common since I don’t read books the way he does. I just wanted to let him get to know me, before—”
“You have nothing to prove, Eddie. Not even to a teacher. Especially not to a teacher who looks at you like you’re the last glass of clean, cold water and he’s dying of thirst.”
“His dad’s got a PhD.”
“And a house full of empty two-liter soda bottles and cockroaches. Everyone’s got something, Eddie. Even guys with advanced degrees have problems. It’s the nature of being human. What do you want?”
“I want someone to love me without all that fine print.”
“You were born with the fine print.” Gabe sighed. “When are you going to believe it doesn’t matter as much as you think it does? You’ve got to believe people can see past it.”
Eddie nodded at that. Swallowed.
“What kind of man do you think Professor Hot Stuff is? He’s probably got pretty good distance vision.”
Eddie huffed a soft laugh. “Maybe.”
“If not, I can hook him up with a pair of binoculars. We’ve got some around here somewhere.”
“I should figure out a way to apologize, huh?”
“I don’t know. Do you feel like you need to?”
“Yeah.” Eddie thumbed his lower lip. “At least for making the situation about me when he’s so worried about his dad.”
“All right then.” Gabe stood. “What are you waiting here for?”
“What about you? What are you doing here so early on a Sunday when there’s nothing on the schedule?”
“I’m meeting a friend for breakfast, if you must know.”
“Would that friend be a certain Detective Dave Huntley?”
“Maybe.” Gabe flushed. “You want to come with us?”
“And be the third wheel? I don’t think so.”
“It’s not like that with Dave and me.”
“Then you’d better get working on it, huh?”
“I’ve been working on it for half my life.” Gabe shrugged. “It’s not like I figure it’s ever going to happen now. Whatever, man.”
“Someday he’ll be ready,” Eddie promised. “And you’ll be right there waiting.”
“Right.” Gabe headed for his office. “There are probably a million pop songs all about that.”
Eddie sat in his office for a while, even after Gabe left to meet Dave.
He thought about his disastrous morning.
Was it true? Was he still living with his fear of what people might say?
Out and proud was one thing, but then he hid his disability.
He’d always thought of that as a choice, but maybe…maybe he was embarrassed by it. Maybe he had too much baggage of his own to pass any kind of judgment on Andrew.
Maybe Andrew was embarrassed by his dad’s house, but that didn’t mean he was ashamed of his father.
Eddie had taken that too far—he’d let the facts get clouded by personal biases. He needed to apologize for letting the argument become about him, about them, when they were really talking about Andrew’s father all along, and what was important was how they could help him.
Eddie tried Andrew’s cell, but it went straight to voice mail. He hoped that was only because Andrew hadn’t charged it, and not because he’d missed his opportunity to make amends.
Before Eddie left the office, he made a call to Skippy. Hopefully, he might want to earn a few extra bucks again, even though it was Sunday.
Then Eddie got his keys and locked the office back up. He headed for the parking lot with a new determination in each step. With any luck, he’d be able to stop Andrew from digging Reese out of his problems at the cost of their relationship.
When Eddie got to Reese’s house, he found Andrew sitting on the front steps. He walked up the pathway and stopped right in front of him.
Andrew looked up, shading his eyes from the sun’s bright glare. “What are you doing here?”
“Thought I’d come by and see how you were doing.”
“How does it look like I’m doing?” Andrew grumbled. “I got here, took one look, and decided to sit down and cry.”
“I don’t see any tears.”
“I’m the crying-on-the-inside kind. On the outside, I like to maintain a facade of mute fury.”
Eddie sat beside him. He folded his hands between his knees to keep from pulling Andrew into his arms. “I’m sorry about this morning.”
Andrew turned to him. “For what?”
“For making things about me. For drawing a parallel between what’s happening with your dad and my situation. It wasn’t helpful.”
“You were right though.”
“I don’t deny it.” Eddie leaned over and buffeted Andrew with his shoulder.
Andrew pushed back. “Tell me how I can help him then. I want to torch this place. I want to bring in a bulldozer and flatten it. I want to do the same to my apartment right now because I see the straight line leading from my place to his. I want to throw everything I own away and go live with mountain gorillas.”
“Don’t do that to yourself. Battle one demon at a time.”
“I never met a book I didn’t like. Didn’t want. I hate letting go of books if I’ve enjoyed them. I’ll buy a book on sale even if there’s not the slightest chance in hell I might someday read it. I can see it all so clearly, all the ways my dad and I are alike.” Andrew frowned. “Did you know he was adopted and he never told me? As far as he’s concerned, I’m the only person on earth who shares his DNA.”
“Great.” Eddie rolled his eyes. “No pressure, right.”
Andrew laughed at that, and then his expression tur
ned serious. “God, you always make me laugh.”
“Do I?”
“Yeah. That’s what drew me to you in the first place. Your sense of humor. How you use it to make others feel good about themselves.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“I used to wish you’d look at me like you look at Lucy.”
Eddie raised an eyebrow at that. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”
“Like having me around is awesome.”
Eddie held his breath. “That could be arranged.”
“My dad is going to be released from the hospital later today, and he can’t come back here with the place like it is.”
“No, he can’t,” Eddie agreed. “That much is obvious.”
“He won’t come to my place. He refused to even consider that.” Andrew took Eddie’s hand in his. “Tell me what I should do here, Eddie. I’m out of my depth. Help me think of a solution.”
“I thought of something this morning. It’s a little unusual…”
“Tell me, Eddie. I’m all ears.” Andrew wrapped his arms around Eddie’s neck and gave him a rough hug. “For the first time in my life, I’m ready to put myself in someone else’s hands, and I can’t think of anyone I’d trust more than I trust you.”
Eddie smiled at that. “See? Now, that’s awesome. Having you around is awesome.”
Chapter 28
The streetlamps were just starting to illuminate Reese’s quiet cul-de-sac as Skippy finally rolled down and locked the back of the Grime truck. He smiled at Eddie, richer by a couple hundred bucks.
“See you bright and early tomorrow, Boss.” He waved and got into the cab, pulling away from the curb just as Andrew drove up with Reese.
Eddie waved good-bye to Skippy and welcomed Andrew and Reese. They’d worked hard all day, and now it was time to see if what they’d done paid off.
Reese emerged from Andrew’s car and eyed his house warily. “What did you guys do?”
“Nothing you didn’t give us permission to do, Dad,” said Andrew. Eddie frowned at how tired he sounded. “The trash is gone.”
“I feel apprehensive.” Reese stopped where he was and sought out Eddie’s gaze.
“It’s fine. I promise,” Eddie reassured him. “Go on in.”
“I wouldn’t put it past Andrew to empty the place out while I was gone. He’s been wanting to gut the place and fix it up for years.”
“We had an agreement, and we stuck to it,” Andrew said. “Come around back, so you can see we took care of the yard. When they inspect tomorrow, they won’t have a thing to complain about.”
Reese let Andrew lead him through the back gate. Sure enough, all the things they’d staged in the yard had been removed. “What did you do with it all?”
“We used the space we gained by throwing out recyclables. I don’t have to tell you, it’s a temporary solution. Pam’s going to call first thing tomorrow to make an ongoing plan for therapy.”
“I see.” Reese glanced around. “The yard looks good.”
“Skippy raked the leaves and trimmed up some.”
“Thank you.” Reese frowned. “Do I dare look inside the house?”
“I’m going to need you to close your eyes for that, Dad.” Andrew stepped up and took his arm. “Go on. Close them.”
“Now you’ve got me worried. Ed?”
“I’m here.” Eddie took Reese’s other arm. “Everything we did is within the scope of our agreement.”
“But after last night, we had to change our plans a little,” Andrew admitted.
“You need a healthy place to live, Reese,” Eddie reminded him.
“What did you do?” Reese’s voice had gone tight with strain.
“Keep your eyes closed.” Andrew and Eddie led Reese into his kitchen. “Wait until I get the lights… There. Open.”
Reese opened his eyes and looked around.
Andrew and Eddie glanced at each other. The kitchen was as clean as they could get it. They’d purchased a midsize refrigerator and microwave. A toaster gleamed on the counter. Plates and silverware had been washed and sat in a strainer on the sink.
“This is nice.” Reese ran his hand over the battered laminate counter. Eddie and Andrew had set up a small table and two chairs in one corner, and beyond, it through the pocket door, it was obvious they’d cleaned out the downstairs bathroom.
“The bathroom down here is clean too.” The three of them went into the tiny three-quarter bath together. Andrew showed Reese how they’d emptied the drawers and filled them with clean towels and grooming supplies: shampoo, toothbrush, toothpaste, clippers, scissors, and a first-aid kit. The shower was clean and clutter free.
“You have everything you need in the bathroom down here.”
“That’s…real nice, son.” Reese turned to Eddie, who, because of space considerations, had stepped back out into the kitchen. “You didn’t have to do this. I have things upstairs.”
“Just for now, I’d rather you were down here,” Andrew said cautiously. “Until we’re sure you have your blood sugar under control.”
“But…”
“Come with me, and I’ll show you what else we did.”
“All right.” Reese followed Andrew to what had been the dining room but was clearly a bedroom now. There was a twin-size bed, and a colorful cardboard set of drawers served as a nightstand. A recliner sat in the opposite corner next to a hamper full of clean clothes. “Wait, what—”
“Before you say anything.” Andrew held his hand up. “We’re sorry if this seems high-handed. I just need to know that while you’re working with Pam, you have somewhere safe to sleep and good food to eat. Clean clothes. I need to know you’re okay, so I don’t worry about you all the time.”
“God damn it, Boston.” Reese’s pale face reddened. “You didn’t used to worry about me. I’m not some old guy who can’t take care of himself.”
“I did worry about you—every single day,” Andrew pointed out. “But since you were such a stubborn old bastard and my worrying didn’t do any good, I just stayed angry all the time.”
“Aw, son.” Reese frowned. “You’ve got nothing to worry about. I’m fine.”
“This is how it has to be. You want to have a relationship? Well then, you take care of yourself. I don’t care if you never fix up the rest of the house, but if this part I cleaned out gets to looking like the city dump again, I’m coming back with a bulldozer. I swear to God.”
“All right.” Reese chuckled. He wrapped his arm around Andrew and knuckled his head. “All right. Tough guy.”
Eddie went to the sink and washed his hands. “I propose you two grab something to drink, and I’ll start dinner.”
“You going to cook for me, Eddie?” Reese asked. Delight lit his features when he turned to Andrew. “He cooks?”
“I don’t know. We haven’t actually gotten that far yet,” said Andrew.
“Well, he knows all our darkest secrets, so I guess you got far enough.”
“I hope I don’t know all your secrets. You should save something back for later.” Eddie held out a bowl of salad he’d made earlier. “Dressing is in the fridge. Andrew said you like Italian?”
“Yes.” Reese took the salad and retrieved the dressing. He glanced at the bottle of red wine on the counter. “This is service. Do I get a glass of wine?”
“Did the doctor say you can have a glass of wine?” Andrew asked.
“I had more tests today than I took in college. I have appointments to follow up with a GP and a whole bunch of other people. For now, I think one glass of red wine won’t kill me as long as I eat my salad with it.”
“Did they give you any kind of diet guide?”
“It’s all in the bag I got discharged with.”
Andrew picked up his bag and headed out to the patio table with it. “Let’s eat outside. I’ll read this over while we’re waiting on dinner.”
“It’s nothing fancy,” Eddie said. “I’ll bring it out there whe
n it’s ready.”
Andrew nodded and closed the door between the house and the yard. His father stood where he was, staring at the yard for such a long time, Andrew asked, “Are you mad at me?”
“For what? Helping me?”
Andrew shrugged. “For taking over.”
“You didn’t take over. You helped out when I needed you.” Reese sat down, still eyeing the garden. “This is nice. It’s almost like it used to be when your mom was still with us.”
Andrew put the salad on the table between them and started setting the table while Reese opened the wine. “I wanted to come here today and have everything hauled away while you were gone.”
“I figured you’d do exactly that. Why didn’t you? Today was your big chance.”
“Eddie.” Andrew glanced into the kitchen. Eddie shifted from foot to foot as if he were dancing. He was chopping onions, tossing them into a hot pan. Steam rose up in clouds, misting his face as he worked. It was almost hard to look at him. He was such a decent guy. “He wouldn’t let me betray your trust like that.”
“He’s a keeper, Andrew.”
“I know that.” Andrew smiled at Eddie through the window. Eddie waved. “Anyway, I argued with him. I told him I’d do it, but when he got here, he found me sitting on the steps. I just couldn’t do that to you.”
“If you had, it would have been okay.”
“No, it wouldn’t. You’d have—”
“No.” Reese put his hand on Andrew’s shoulder. “If you never listen to another goddamn thing I say, listen now. Yesterday scared me. I remember feeling sick. Going down. I remember thinking, ‘Oh, my God, is this how it’s going to be?’ After a fight with you, I’m going to just die here on my mound of garbage? I’d rather have you in my life than anything. Any thing.”
“Dad.” Andrew scooted his chair over to give his dad a hug. He hid his face in the shoulder of his dad’s soft V-neck T-shirt and croaked, “I missed you too.”
“Aw, Andrew.” The old man was crying, and as uncomfortable as it made Andrew feel, he hung on and listened, really listened to his dad when he said, “You’re more important than anything. You don’t have to stay away anymore. I’ll make this right. I’ve missed you so much, son.”
Eddie: Grime Doesn't Pay (The Brothers Grime Book 2) Page 22
