***
Within the Division of Youth and Family Services Office in Somerville Massachusetts, a caseworker was talking to her manager in her small, crowded office. Files were spread across her desk and on top of her file cabinets. Yellow stickies had almost covered her monitor and phone.
“Robert, I don’t like it. The mother isn’t doing anything to hurt the kid. We have no right to remove the child from her.”
“Selma, my hands are being tied here. The mayor called me directly to ask me what we were going to do about it. He demanded action. I’m not given any choice.”
“Can’t you fight back? Christ, we have mothers on crack. I know. I sent you their lab reports, who you allowed to keep their children. Janet Ryan’s a loving and educated woman. This mother is doing all she can to save her baby. You want me to separate them? For what? You know we can’t pull the computer plug.”
“Selma, please, this is now out of my hands. It’s a three-ring circus out there. The Mayor’s phones are ringing off the hook. Ninety percent of his constituents want them separated. The mayor said you should take the police with you. Can you schedule it for tomorrow afternoon? I hope that we can find some loophole or something in the meantime. Maybe return the baby to his grandmother and loose our file on it in a year or two assuming the kid lasts that long.”
***
It was 8:30 AM in Cambridge Massachusetts. There were picket signs in front of the Lepto-Molecular Pharmaceuticals office building. One read, “Stop Dr. Frankenstein,” another “No Research on our Babies,” another “Unlimited Science is Evil”. Two Cambridge police officers barred the entrance.
A large black German Shepherd, sporting a grey bandana around its neck, came up to the door, whimpered, and started to scratch on it. One officer looked at the other, shrugged, and let the dog in. The dog ran up the stairs to the floor of the Lepto-Molecular offices and scratched on this door. A secretary opened the door and the dog began to bark. The abbreviated staff exited their offices to see what the strange noise was.
Bill Norris, the president of Lepto-Molecular Pharmaceuticals, exited his office. He was balding and had a slight paunch. “What’s going on here?” The barking stopped. The dog lay down on the floor and crawled on all fours, up to the man. On reaching him, the dog pulled a letter from under its bandanna, gave it to the man, turned, and walked to the door. A secretary opened the door, and the dog quietly disappeared down the stairs.
***
It was 8:30 AM in Somerville Massachusetts. A 40-year-old brunette was sitting by the kitchen table, seeing her world collapse. Her hand was stirring the sugar in her coffee cup. The cup was already cool. She knew that the world of public opinion was against her. “Now they’re calling me Dr. Frankenstein,” she muttered to no one. She had just turned off NPR who did a piece clarifying that Frankenstein was the doctor and his creation was only known as the Monster. Her life was crumbling. She was startled when she heard a ping on the porch door. Looking up, she saw a large blue and gold Macaw flying near the glass, tapping it with its beak and fly back a few inches. The large bird repeated this maneuver a few times. Dr. Ryan went to the porch door and opened it. “What’s wrong boy?” The large bird flew in. It landed on an iron kitchen chair and clearly said with a crisp English accent, “I have a letter for you Dr. Ryan”. It dropped a two-inch pellet holding a letter that had been clutched in its talons. “Please read it with your husband. It’s urgent.” The bird, dipped its head in a nod, and then flew out through the open door.
***
Both Janet and Sidney Ryan were talking on their phones to Bill Norris.
“Yes Bill, we may have gotten the same letter. Ours came by a carrier parrot. Strangest thing I ever saw. It was able to talk in complete English sentences. Ours letter says ‘Dear Drs. Ryan, I would like to have a conference call with you and Mr. Norris to solve your mutual problems. We are on your side. We really would like to help. We will call you both at 10 AM. Time is of the essence. It was then signed a friend, Martin Klein MD, CompuHead Industries P.S. Please burn this letter after reading it.’ ”
“This is Sidney, I’m on the phone too. Klein, why does that name sound familiar?”
“Sid, isn’t that the doctor who first published using nanotubes to do brain recordings twenty years ago?”
“That was it!” said Janet. “But I never heard what happened to him since. Do you think it’s the same person as the mystery letter author? We could listen to him. We have nothing to lose at this point.”
“All I can add,” said Norris “is that CompuHead is an expensive disk drive manufacturer. It’s not on the stock exchange. I don’t see this Dr. Klein mentioned at all on its site. They don’t do any medical research, as far as I could find out.”
“I, for one, want to hear what he has to say,” continued Norris. “I’m ready to close down tomorrow. The stock has bottomed.”
***
When Janet touched the letter to the stove’s flame, she let out a squeal of shock as it burst into a small fireball. Startled she let go and noticed that no ash remained from the letter. She wasn’t hurt. It reminded her of the flash that magicians use in their shows.
***
At exactly 10 AM the phone rang. Janet and Sidney picked up two extensions.
“Hello, I think we’re all here. First, let me introduce myself. My name is Doctor Martin Klein. I’m a friend. I have some bad news and some great news. The bad news is that this afternoon, at 2 PM the city of Somerville will be having a social worker and some policemen pick up your son. With all the reporters and wackos out there, you’ll have a very hard time running. The good news is first, I am your friend, even though we’ve never met. Although you have no real reason to, believe me when I say that I can completely empathize with your situation. Second, we can get you out to a place where you’re safe and we can talk. Finally, when we can talk I have an offer for safety for Joshua and the Ryans. I would like to buy you out Mr. Norris. Would twenty million dollars be an honest offer? The name and location of the laboratory would need to change, however the leadership and goals can be the same.”
Sidney asked, “Who are you?”
“I think you’re familiar with my research on carbon nanotubes. I’ve made some progress over the years. I think you’ll be startled when I share my findings. However, I’d like to postpone that until we get to a place where we can talk.”
Janet said, “Sid, I don’t know how many options we have. However, I’m willing to trust this man. I believe him when he says they will be bringing the police to take Josh. Almost everyone is against us. Did you hear the interview with the mayor? We need to run. One thing first, can we bring Corey with us?”
Martin hesitated, “Corey, who is Corey?”
Janet continued, “Corey Rogers is my best friend. She’s a veterinarian from the labs. She’s, ah, been with me from this beginning.”
Martin said, “You trust her completely with Joshua? She wouldn’t betray you … us here?”
“Yes”
Martin continued, “Okay, Bill is she at the lab? Can we pick you both up in 30 minutes? Take anything you want for a few days out of the office, but you won’t have time to pack. We’ll pick your wife up too, Bill. I expect we’re going to be away for a bit. The timing will be precarious.”
“We’ll pick Janet, Sidney and Joshua up in their house at 10:45 sharp. Here is the plan …”
***
Margaret Griffith had decided to picket this blasphemer with a number of other women from her church. Imagine making people completely different from the way God had intended. Her placard read, “In God’s Image, not your Toaster’s,” Trudy her girlfriend had written, “The Soul is not Downloadable”. They had attracted a number of news people in the last two days.
She noticed a large car with a “Papa Giuseppe’s” flag over the passenger’s side. It had a prominent rear deck spoile
r. The driver, a young man with a baseball hat, strange necklace with large black, glass beads, and dark sunglasses, rolled down the window, “Are you the Ryan’s?” The driver had a tee shirt that read ‘Uncle David’s Pick-up and Delivery’. The picture on the shirt was of a football player scooping up a ball, running, with his left hand out to block.
“Oh, no, THEY are in there.” Margaret pointed to the house. The boy, with a lopsided grin, rolled onto the driveway and exited the car. He went to the backseat and pulled out a pizza box, walked to the side door, and walked in. He left the doors open. A few moments later, he walked to the car, and started it. All of a sudden, a woman, and a man carrying a tiny child, ran to the car and entered the rear seat. The car was moving by the time the door closed.
A reporter, who was seated in his car, waiting to interview them, turned his car on, to give chase. As he started to move forward, all four tires blew. He quickly exited the car when he saw the four caltrops that had punctured his tires. A set of rocks by the tires also prevented his movement. Cursing, he called in the car’s description to his paper, but it was too late. He didn’t notice the large bird circling overhead giving command and control to the ground forces.
Two miles away, a large car driven by Martin, with Bill and Rebecca Norris, and Corey Rogers met the pizza car driven by David. The pizza delivery sign and rear deck spoiler was tossed into a garbage can, while a dog, ferret and bird entered the front seat of the pizza car. Both cars drove west across the Mass Pike. Four other cars, filled with large men, flanked David’s and Martin’s cars.
***
It was 8 AM in Ellenville, New York. A young woman met the owner of the Corona Hotel in the Catskills.
“Mr. Gilbert, I’d like to rent your entire hotel for $25,000 per day for the next two weeks.”
John Gilbert looked at the redheaded woman, who had a stylish asymmetric hairstyle with one side cut short and the other cascading over her shoulder blade. She looked like she was in her mid-twenties, but had the no-nonsense voice of someone who always gets what she wants. He realized it must be some sort of a scam. “I’m sorry, but we have guests staying with us right now.”
The woman took out a wad of hundred dollar bills. “I’ll give them each $1,000 per day to relocate to another hotel.”
John Gilbert had never seen such a large stack of hundreds. He gulped.
“Like I said, I want to rent your entire hotel for two hundred eighty thousand dollars. Do we have a deal.”
“W-what is it for?”
“A very, very private meeting of noted businessmen. I’m sorry, but that’s all I can tell you. And it wouldn’t be a good idea to ask any other questions.”
“I’m going to have to ask my wife.”
“He hurried to the back and had a brief discussion with his wife, who came to the front to look at the woman.”
The young redheaded woman had opened a large suitcase with piles of hundred dollar bills. Gilbert’s wife checked one pile at random, riffled through them, and then checked to see if it were counterfeit. She made a small nod to her husband.
“At the end of two weeks, I recommend you come back to see if we need the hotel for any longer stay. However, I don’t recommend you stay. These businessmen are quite private and the less you see, the better for all concerned. Capiche? If you agree, I want all rooms prepared, firewood set, and the kitchen stocked. I want everyone out by one o’clock. We’ll supply our own staff.”
The guests were told of a gas leak and given the offer to stay free at a nearby four-star hotel, with the hotel paying $300 for the guest’s inconvenience. All patrons greedily accepted the offer. The rooms were prepared and a light meal was set on trays for the oven. The owners and staff of the Corona Hotel left.
Six hours later, two cars arrived and parked in the reception area. The four other cars, filled with large bodyguards, were parked on either side of the hotel’s driveways.
The Ryans, Norris family, and Corey Rogers were all ushered into the dining room, where some light refreshments and drinks were waiting for them and they were given keys for their rooms. David suggested that they reassemble in two hours at six PM, while they refresh themselves, change, and rest from their ordeal. The worst was over.
***
In their rooms, Bill and Rebecca Norris sat down on their queen-sized bed. Rebecca looked around, “This is not even a two-star hotel room. Bill, look at the wallpaper and the water stains on the ceiling.”
Bill sighed, “I know dear. I’m not sure if I trust them. I pity the poor Ryans though. They had to spend three hours cooped up in the back seat of that car sharing it with those two dogs and parrot. It was a strange time to send them for a constitutional.”
“Bill, I’m not sure you noticed, but there was a ferret with them as well.”
“You’re kidding, Becky, no I didn’t. And how would they expect us to get dressed? Did you pack anything?”
“No, I didn’t have any time. Let’s see if they left us anything. There may be a set of janitor’s clothes somewhere.”
Bill walked to the closet and opened it. “Oh-my-god, Becky, get over here, and look at this.”
Rebecca looked at the closet. She exclaimed, “It’s a complete wardrobe of clothes. Let me look. It’s even your size. There are pants, jackets, and two coats. And a set of clothes for me. It’s my size too. Check the drawers.”
Bill opened some draws “This drawer has a dozen packages of unopened sox and underclothes. And I found another drawer for you too.” Hold on, “Toiletries are in the bathroom. It even has my cologne and my brand of electric razor, like the one you bought me for Christmas.”
Rebecca looked at Bill, “I’m getting scared Bill. How did they know our sizes, what you use for cologne? They know too much. Perhaps they’ve had private investigators tailing us night and day.”
“I’m tending to agree. That offer they gave for my company. The company is almost bankrupt, why would they have offered to buy it? Something is certainly wrong. Did you notice all those cars that surrounded our car and the Ryan’s cars and are now parked in the driveway? They were full of very large men.”
“Bill, I’m scared, I’m very scared. Should we leave?”
“Those bodyguards, I’m not sure we even can leave. Why don’t we play along for a bit? Frankly, I’m getting a bit curious. They obviously went to great expense to get us all here. And the Ryans are really in trouble. I want to hear what they want to say.”
Rebecca fearfully looked at Bill, “Bill, is the company really doing so bad?”
Bill somberly nodded, “I don’t think we can recover. We may need to sell the house.”
“Bill, this Dr. Klein, do you think he’s behind the catastrophe with your company?”
“I don’t think so Becky. But looking at the wardrobe, he has the resources.”
***
At six PM, all the parties gathered in a small room. Drinks were in the center of the room and all the chairs were set facing one another in a broken circle. Three chairs were moved slightly away from the others, two dogs and a large blue and gold bird were sitting in them. The animals were watching the groups enter. When the Lepto-Molecular contingent arrived, the bird flew to the top of its chair and said in a 1930-style formal English accent, “Good day to you ladies and gentlemen, my name is Eagle One. I apologize for my name, but the person who named me had a, shall I say, warped sense of humor. I am of course a macaw.” The bird raised its wings, bowed, and then flew to a nearby table where four earplugs were placed. The bird continued, “My apologies, Ms. Rogers, but we had not anticipated your joining us, so alas, we are currently one short. I hope one of the others could tell you what they will be hearing.”
At this time, Martin and David appeared and stood behind the chairs where the two dogs were seated. Martin said, “I think we should all introduce ourselves. Could you please put on the earplugs.” Everyone nodded. The
larger of the two dogs jumped from the chair, looked at each and talked via the earplugs.
Hansel: Hullow, my namen ist Hansel. I am sheven years old; in your years, I’m in my middle years. However, if I shay so myself, I feel I am in da prime ov my life. My chief duty in the Klein household iz zat of shecurity, vhich I share vit the uttor enhanced animals.” The dog had a strong German accent. Hansel paused, lifted up a paw and pointed it toward the other two animals. Would one of you please tell Ms. Rogers what I said?
Bill looked at the dog, “That is a remarkable trick. How did you get the dog to make those expressions and move around like that?”
Corey asked, “What is going on? Who is saying what?”
Bill said, “The dog, which was on the floor, was making all these motions in time to a voice track. It sounded like it introduced himself.”
Hansel, looked at Martin, slowly shook his head from side to side.
Hansel: Dey don’t get it yet Martin.
Martin sighed, “They will.”
The dog looked at Bill and shook his head as if saying no.
Hansel: Perhaps Eagle One could zpeak some zense into them. I think he vould do a better job of it than Hildegard or I and she vill be able to talk and be heard by all ov zhem.
Hansel walked slowly back to the chair, hopped on, gestured for Eagle One to start.
Sidney turned to Corey and said, “They dog suggested the parrot should talk. It actually looked and sounded like it was exasperated with us. A remarkable trick.”
Eagle One looked at each of the guests, it cleared its throat, and then began. “First, Ms. Rogers, we had not anticipated your arrival today so we had not gotten any clothes for you yet. Phyllis is currently shopping at a mall about 45 minutes away. She says she expects to be back here in fifteen minutes. Perhaps I could relax you a bit with some imitations. Anyone?”
Corey who had been largely unaware of most of what had been going on before said “Elvis”.
The parrot flew to a dining room settee, picked up a teaspoon, and flew it to the table that had held the earplugs. Eagle One put the spoon down and grabbed it near the bottom end, holding it like a microphone, “Love me tender / Love me sweet, never let me go.” Then he went into some gyrations singing Jailhouse Rock. After singing part of Hound Dog, he asked her for another performer. Corey asked for Homer Simpson. The bird then said “Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel. Here's to alcohol, the cause of—and solution to—all life's problems. I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.” Corey approached the bird, looked at Martin, pointed to the bandanna and asked, “May I”.
The Infinite when it was Two Digits Old Page 19
