by Mj Fields
By the grace of God, it works.
By the time the kids get up, I am ready for school, my bag is packed with both school stuff and for the game tonight.
And when they come down the stairs, they freak out, in a good way.
Our first class together I slide him the picture, on the back I’d written
I don’t know how to thank you, my friend.
Tessa
“I have a few ideas,” he chuckles under his breath, and I smack him.
“Relax. I worked them all out in the shower.”
Oh. My. God.
He then whispers, “Thank you for that, by the way.”
At lunchtime, Lucas sits across from me, and we stare at each other the entire time. His focus on my eyes is fierce.
“Did either of you hear the bell?” Jade asks.
Both of us laugh and stand. As I pass by Lucas, he grabs my hand as if it was second nature. When I stiffen, he notices.
He lifts my hand and kisses it before letting go. He then lifts his chin. “See you later, Tessa.”
God, I hope so.
We’re ahead by three at the end of the third quarter when I hear a puppy barking and look across the field to see Lucas carrying Chewy up the bleachers. After he sits, he raises Chewy’s puppy paw and gives me a wave. I laugh and wave back.
“Lucas got a puppy?” Phoebe asks.
“No, Lucas got me a puppy,” I whisper. “His name is Chewy.”
I don’t look at Phoebe’s reaction. I’m sure she’s disappointed. If she was still falling for a guy after what went down with him and me, meaning Sadi, I would be disappointed in her.
I keep my head in the game and don’t allow myself to look over until the game ends in a score of seven to three. When I do, he’s surrounded by girls all gushing over him and Chewy. Lucas is smiling as he sets him down, and Chewy’s little puppy paws run as fast as they can to me.
I bend down, pick him up, and give him puppy-sized hugs as he gives me puppy kisses.
I laugh then laugh harder when I see Lucas walking over and half the swarm of Bs buzzing around him follow.
“Links, is that your baby?” the goalie from the other team asks as she reaches over and pets Chewy. “Got to be. He’s a handsome little guy.”
He lifts his chin to her. “Hey, Julie, he’s actually Tessa’s puppy. Tessa, this is Julie.”
“Nice to meet you, Julie,” I say as I try to stop Chewy’s tongue that has slipped into my mouth twice now.
“You, too,” she says coldly then turns and faces him.
“So, Lucas, you free tonight? I’ve missed you.”
Lucas clears his throat. “Actually, I have been meaning to get a hold of you.”
Unbelievable. I laugh inside as I walk away.
I introduce Chewy to the team as Lucas says his apology to one of the dirty dozen.
I feel a tug on my braid and look over my shoulder.
“Number six.” He then bends down and kisses the top of my sweaty head.
“How did that taste?” I laugh because ew.
“Like more.” He kisses my head again.
What the hell? I think. “S’mores?”
“Yeah, s’mores.” He chuckles.
Getting all swept up in Lucas and knowing where that will lead, I know I need distance.
“Can you keep him while I go shower?”
Lucas takes a deep breath and sets his jaw. “Of course, he’s way more distracting than a basket of dead ones.”
Shower.
After a cold shower, which was brutal, but hey, I’ve heard it helps chill one’s libido, and Lucas alone sparks it up enough, but Lucas with Chewy, it makes me think seriously stupid thoughts.
Walking out, I see Lucas throwing a toy for Chewy in the field, and Chewy running after it. But he certainly hasn’t mastered the art of bringing it back.
I hurry out and watch as he sniffs around the field and chooses his spot to pee.
“Aw … he’s got to go potty. Good boy, Chewy.”
“You get he’s pissing on your starting position?”
“Oh my God, he is.” I laugh.
“He’s marking his territory, baby.” Lucas shakes his head.
“Great game, Tessa Ross,” Maxwell, one of the soccer players, says as he walks by, seriously looking me up and down.
“Thanks, Maxwell.” I nod then quickly look back to Chewy but catch Lucas scowling at Maxwell.
“Tessa?” Lucas arches a brow.
“Yes?” I arch mine back.
“How offended would you be if I pissed on your leg and marked you as mine?”
I smack at him.
Smiling, he then asks, “Was John angry?”
“Actually, no, he was great about it. We still have an invisible fence from Hans so that helps.”
“That’s cool, so Chewy will be an outside dog?” Lucas asks, concern etched in his eyes.
“With Hans, when we were outside, he was, too. The invisible fence kept him safe. He slept inside with us every night, but if he wanted to go out, and we were preoccupied, he was safe to go out alone for a bit. When we weren’t home, he was inside. Chewy has to be trained on the boundaries, and we have to know he’s ready. It’ll be a while before he’s out without anyone supervising,” I explain, hoping to reassure him.
“Okay, good.” He looks relieved.
“Do you want to keep him for a few hours?”
“Like joint custody?” He shakes his head. “Tessa, he’s yours. He chose you.”
“Would you like to come up for dinner then?”
He smiles. “I wouldn’t want to impose.”
“Do I need to beg?”
“Oh God, please don’t.” He looks down at his dick.
Oh my. “Dead pu—”
He puts his hand over my mouth. “Not in front of Chewy.”
I narrow my eyes and bite his hand. His eyes roll back, and then he closes them on a groan.
I laugh. “You’re sadistic.”
“You have no idea,” he moans.
My heart begins racing, and my brain then catches up. What the hell am I thinking? With what happened with Sadi just a few days ago, here I am, having these thoughts again.
“Okay, no dinner then?”
“I would love to, but right now, Tessa, I think I should go home,” he says sadly.
“Then, why do you look upset?”
“I’ve just had a rough few days.”
“Yeah, me, too,” I mumble as I grab Chewy’s leash.
“Before you run off, I just wanted to let you know that I’m going away for a few days.”
I look up, and he looks down.
“Oh. Why?” I mentally kick my own ass for asking. “I’m sorry. I meant to say have fun.” I look down, and he laughs. “Well, I don’t know what I should say.”
“What do you want to say, Tessa?” Lucas asks.
“Are you okay? Is your family all right? Where are you going? Are you going alone? Do you want to have sex before you go so you won’t want anyone else? Probably all the creepy, crazy, jealous girlfriend things boys hate, and I’m not even your girlfriend.”
What the fuck is wrong with me!
A smile, a very genuine smile, begins to grow on his perfect face. “I’m driving down to New Jersey to see my dad for a couple days. It’s been a while. I loved that you asked if I was okay first. That’s not what a creepy, crazy, jealous girlfriend would ask.” Lucas laughs. “I am doing no one else. Well, no one at all, actually. But there’s this girl I love, anyway.” He steps forward, grabs my hip with one hand, and Chewy’s leash with the other, and hugs me.
“Aw … how cute … you two had a puppy.” Sadi walks by and flips us off.
“Fucking hate that bitch,” he grumbles.
“When will you leave?” I ask, wishing I was strong enough to step back.
“As soon as I leave you.” He kisses the top of my head. “Be back for school Friday morning so I can still play in the game.”
; “Please drive safely and call me when you get there.”
Chapter Twenty
I walk into the house and stand in the kitchen for a few minutes. My bag is already packed and sitting by the door. I walk through the house and make sure everything is locked up tightly, grab my phone charger, and then turn off the light.
I walk out and slide into my car, start it, and pull out of the driveway, trying to mentally prepare myself for the dreaded five-hour drive, trying to look at the bright side—at least one of my obligatory nights will be without the drama that always ensues when my father, Landon, is in a new relationship.
I reach up and turn on the radio, and the Bangles are singing our song, “When I See You Smile.” I will take that as a good sign.
Five hours later, I’m mentally prepared for what I am about to deal with. Brick by brick, I built the wall protectively over my heart and engaged the shield around my soul. By the time I pull into the driveway of Dad’s lake house, I’m exhausted.
The motion lights come on, lighting up the entire driveway, and I blink away the sting as I look at the house and see Dad and a new blonde, who is way too young for him, walk out onto the porch. Here we go, I think as I kill the engine and step out of my car.
Before I even say hello, Dad is introducing his newest conquest.
“Lucas, this stunning woman is Mandi, with an I.”
Of course, with an I.
“And Mandi, this is Lucas, star quarterback, honors student, and my devastatingly handsome son.”
She smiles. “Nice to meet you, Lucas. You’re almost as cute as your daddy.”
“You alone, Lucas?” Dad asks, looking past me and at my car.
I nod.
“Losing your touch, boy?”
I roll my eyes. “Dad, can we discuss this later?”
“Just odd. You always bring something to keep you warm.” He winks and laughs as we walk in the house.
I walk into the kitchen and set my bag down. Then I put my phone on the island and sit in one of the leather stools lined up in front of the counter. “Dad, can we talk alone for a minute?”
“Mandi is privy to everything in my life. Talk freely, son.” He turns away from me and smiles back at Mandi, with an I. “Hey, sexy, would you grab us a couple beers out of the fridge?”
“Sure, Landon,” she says, smiling.
“Dad, I need to talk to you alone.”
Mandi sets two beers on the granite countertop. “Landon, I’m a little tired. I’m going to head up to bed. You two talk.” Mandi smiles. “Very nice to meet you, Lucas.”
I force myself to be polite. “You, too.”
“What’s going on, Lucas?”
“Mom’s in the hospital. She had a relapse last Friday. I want to get her into rehab, and I need your help,” I say, fully prepared for what comes next.
“The psych ward again? What the fuck is wrong with her?” Dad asks. “That bitch has never been able to keep it together for more than six months.”
“Don’t talk about my mother that way.”
My phone rings, and I quickly silence it.
He grabs my phone and looks at the screen. “Tessa Ross? How long have you been doing her?”
“I haven’t done Tessa.” I grab my phone and put it in my pocket. “It’s not like that with her. So, are you going to help Mom or not?”
“Why should I? I’ve paid for the house, I pay all the bills, and you have a credit card with no restrictions.” He takes a long pull off his beer. “What more should I be obligated to do for her?”
“For her, Dad? You’ve been divorced since I was three. You try to make her feel worthless. Jesus Christ, Dad, you put the house in my name even before I turned eighteen. You broke your legal agreement. You’re obligated, even though you don’t fucking get it,” I snap.
“Drink your beer, son. You need to relax. And watch your tone; I’m your father.”
“My father who is giving his eighteen-year-old son a beer to relax. My father who wants to know why I didn’t bring a piece of ass with me and who wants Flavor of the Month to be present for our conversation. My father who has known I’ve stayed alone since I was fourteen while my mother dries up and that’s a fucking walk in the park because, since I was old enough to remember, I’ve been cleaning up her vomit, and you don’t give a—”
“That’s enough, Lucas,” he cuts me off. “You cannot blame me for your mother’s problems. It’s not my fault she’s an alcoholic!”
“How many of your ex-wives aren’t alcoholics, Dad?”
“That’s not my fault.” He puffs out his chest.
“Well, ask yourself what the common denominator between them is.” I stand and grab my bag to head upstairs.
Once behind closed doors, I pick up my phone to call Tessa back.
When she answers, I simply say, “Here.”
“Okay,” she whispers.
“Sweet dreams, Tessa Ross.”
“You, too, Lucas.”
Lying in bed, I wonder if she read my letter today and hope she realizes how much she truly means to me, hoping I got it right.
She’s more precious to me every day. Her innocence and heart are pure and perfect. I want to be her soft place to land when she feels like falling. I dream of making her as happy as she makes me.
Day 5 without Tessa Ross makes me realize I have to become the man she deserves. To love and take care of her always,
LYA,
Lucas
When I wake up, Dad is gone. I grab a pair of shorts and lace up my sneakers. Then I pull out my phone and call Tessa’s house. The answering machine picks up, but I don’t leave a message. I toss my phone on the bed to head out for a run.
As I’m running, I see Leah outside her parents’ house, where I first met her last year. She sees me, squints to be sure it’s me, and then waves frantically. I slow down and stop in front of her, smiling and holding up a finger while I attempt to catch my breath. She laughs, smiles back, and pushes her hair behind her ear. I turn and bend, putting my hands on my knees to get my breath steady.
When I’ve got it under control, I turn and ask, “Hey, you remember me?”
“Of course I do, Lucas.” She smiles.
“I’m going through something, and, well … I fell in love, and she made me realize how wrong I’ve been to act like I did—the whole sleeping around thing. So, I’m sorry, Leah.”
“She must be something special.”
“I hope you’ve found someone who treats you better than I did.”
“I haven’t. I’ve been waiting to see you again.”
“I’m sorry. Please forgive me.” I pull my shirt up to wipe the sweat from my face.
She eye-fucks my abs. “Forgiven.”
I shake her hand, content that I’ve made amends, and then finish my run.
Getting out of the shower, I hear Dad call up, “Anyone home?”
“I’ll be down in a minute,” I answer as I dry off.
As soon as I come down, Dad nods toward the kitchen. “Let’s eat lunch, Lucas.” He then looks at his watch. “Your sisters will be here at two. I have a sitter coming to watch them while I’m at a meeting with possible investors. I’d like you to join me.”
I decide it’s best I give in to some of his request, hoping he coughs up the money to pay for Mom’s rehab.
We agree that I’ll meet him at four, and when he leaves, I allow myself to get excited to see my sisters. Tessa is close to her family, even in the midst of a divorce, and I want that, too. I just hope it’s not too late.
At one thirty, as I finish washing my car in the driveway, Audrianna pulls in with Alexandra and Ally. I smile as I watch the little beauties, with big green eyes and caramel hair, dressed in matching pink dresses and white shoes, climb out of her car. Their hair is in pigtails with ribbons tied perfectly around them, bouncing with each step. They favor Audri more, but they also carry similar traits to me and Dad.
“Hello, Audri,” I say, winding up the hose and smilin
g at the girls. “They are beautiful.”
“How are you, Lucas? Ally and Alexandra, this is your big brother, Lucas. Do you remember him, girls?” Audrianna asks.
They both nod their heads and smile shyly.
I hang the hose and walk over to squat down to eye level with them. “I’m going to hang out with you guys for a few hours before I have to go meet Dad for one of his meetings. What would you like to do?”
Audri answers her ringing phone. “Hello … Oh, okay … I’ll see what I can do … No, I understand … See you soon. Dammit,” she mumbles under her breath as she hangs up.
“Ashley,” she calls to her sister, who I didn’t realize was with her, “we have a problem.”
“Is that your aunt?” I ask the girls.
“Yes.” They giggle in unison.
“Good, I need to talk to her. Audri, do you mind?” I nod toward the car.
“You’re asking permission?” Audri asks.
“Look, what went on between us was a long time ago. But yeah, I guess I am.”
“She’s happy, Lucas,” Audri cautions.
“Good. I am, too” I nod to the car again. “Is it all right?”
“Go ahead.” Audri looks at her watch.
I walk to the car and open the door. “Hey, Ash, you look amazing. Can we take a walk?”
Ashley’s eyes widen. “Lucas … I don’t think that’s a good idea.” She looks toward the girls. “I am … seeing someone.”
“Me, too, Ash.” I wink. “I just want to apologize for some things.”
“Okay then,” Ashley says hesitantly.
I always liked her. Well, her ass was what drew me to her. She has an apple of an ass and never said no to anything I wanted to do to her, or it. But that’s not the only reason she’s probably the only one I truly liked. It was because she was so chill, and yeah, she hated my dad, too.
We only walk a few feet away, and then I give my normal spiel, but I ask that she and I remain in contact for the girls.
She hugs me. “You deserve to be happy, Lucas.”
“So do you, Ash.” I hug her back.
“We’re good, right?” she asks.
