by RH Tucker
I slap my face a couple of times, sobering myself up a bit more. Getting back to my starting point, I take a deep breath and try again. This time I’m able to hold on to the top of the wall, and Derrik leans over, grabbing my arm to help me up.
We both start laughing as I finally make it up. After a second, he jumps down to the other side. Feeling a little better but still befuddled as to what we’re doing, I follow along, and we make our way through the seats of the Bowl.
We’ve had a lot of concerts here. Every time it’s been with a sold-out crowd, lights illuminating the sky, and our music echoing around. Walking through the concert area this way feels different. Bigger, if that makes any sense. With all of us, the fans cheering, and all of our equipment everywhere, it makes the area feel small. Tiny even.
Right now, with no one around but just Derrik and me? It feels immense.
Making our way up to the stage, Derrik approaches the edge—the spot where he might be singing out to the crowd, taking in the adulation. He drops to his knees, then sits with his legs crossed, looking out at the empty seats. He glances up at me, raising his brows, so I follow suit and sit next to him.
“Hollywood Bowl,” I say aimlessly, then start laughing. “Remember when that girl skirted through security and started tearing at your shirt?”
He nods, laughing along. “Or that dude jumping on stage and kissing your sister’s feet?”
“Ugh!” I shout through laughter. “I could’ve gone an entire lifetime without anyone bringing that up again. What is it with guys and foot fetishes?”
Derrik chuckles. “To each their own.” A quietness floats between us, and he stares out again to no one. “What’s going on, Maddox?”
His question brings me back to reality, evaporating my humor. I stare down at the stage under my legs. “Nothing,” I whisper.
My mind wanders, wondering if he thought bringing me here, to when we had some great memories, was a way to calm me down. It worked for a minute, but once he asks the question, everything that’s happened in the last few days comes back to the forefront. I wish I could dull the pain with alcohol again.
“Oh, I got another one,” he says quietly. “Remember our first show here?”
I look over at him, remembering it like it was yesterday. It wasn’t just our first show here, it was everything else that happened that night. “I’ll never forget.”
He nods, smiling at me. “Platinum. Our first platinum record. Peter told us we broke the single-day download records that day, too.”
“It was …” I can’t finish, remembering the feelings. We’d received the news about two hours before we got on stage to perform. This was before our world tour. We were just heating up; just beginning this whirlwind life that’s encompassed us. “It was amazing.”
“We rocked the show that night. You played like a madman.”
I laugh. “We all did. Jade was on fire, EJ’s solos were awesome, and you sang your heart out. Man, we were on cloud nine … No, we were on cloud nine hundred that night.”
He grins. “And what’d we say, Maddox?” He looks over at me. “After that show, when we were all backstage, still feeling like superstars and the world was for our taking. What’d we say?”
I know the words he’s talking about, but I don’t want to say them. We were all already close by then, so I had no problem thinking of him and EJ as family. All of the touring, practicing, and recording before. All of the time we spent together drew us closer. But the words that night that Derrik said cemented it forever. And even though he’s the one who said them, we all believed them. Still do.
“We said family forever,” he continues. “I told you and Jade that there would be no band without you two. There are no Kings of Karmichael without all of us. And no matter what crap we go through, or what awards we win, we would always be there for one another. Always.”
My gaze stays on him, listening to his words. We’ve laughed together and argued with one another. There have been times when I absolutely wanted to punch him in the face, and I’m sure he’s felt the same about me. But through it all, thick and thin, good and bad, we’ve always had one another’s back. Because he’s right; family forever.
An annoyed growl floats out, but it’s not directed at him. I rub my hands over my face, then look out over the seats. “It’s over. Cece and me. I … I had to end it.”
“Why?”
A disgusted chortle floats out, and I shake my head, staring down at my legs. “Her asshole father. He said if I didn’t break up with her that he’d cut her out of their lives.” I wait for him to respond, but he doesn’t. He simply sits there, waiting for me to continue. “I thought he meant money at first, but he meant everything. He said if she stayed with me, she wouldn’t be able to see her own family.”
“Why would he do that?”
“Because he’s an arrogant, billionaire prick. He wants to choose who she dates and marries, and eventually has a family with. All of that. He already tried it with this other guy, but when he saw that we were going out … I don’t know. I guess I’m not the kind of guy he wants for her.”
After a moment of silence, he speaks up. “What’d she say?”
“What do you mean?”
“When you told her what her dad is doing? She’s going along with it?”
“What?” I scoff, staring at him like he’s crazy. “No, man. I didn’t tell her.”
“Maddox, why not? She should—”
“No. She shouldn’t. I’m not going to be the one to tell her what kind of ass her father is, while at the same time giving her an ultimatum. No way.”
Derrik’s eyes never leave me, but I can’t return the gaze. I look out over the empty seats once again, the feelings of disgust returning.
“Maddox, she should know.”
“She’s his little girl. I’m not going to destroy that relationship even if it’s a shitty thing he’s doing.”
Derrik shakes his head, finally looking away from me. “You think you’re doing the right thing, and I get that. But I have to tell you, I don’t think you are. None of us ever saw you like you were when you were with her. Happy, unlike any of us had ever seen. I don’t mean the normal happy, I mean something more. Not because of drinks or girls, but because of something that meant something to you. And you want to give all of that up and let her believe her father’s some great person?”
“You don’t get it,” I tell him, my voice low.
After another minute of silence, he finally replies. “You’re right, I don’t. I just hope you’re making the right decision. Not only for her sake, but for yours.”
28
Cece
When the week started, I wasn’t sure how I was going to make it without going crazy. After talking to Stephanie, she ended up canceling her plans and hanging out with me for the rest of the day, but my mind still ran in circles. I feel like there’s a hamster wheel my brain is running on, and it just keeps going round and round. Spinning with unanswerable questions as to why Maddox did what he did. Maybe I’m a complete idiot, but I believed him when he was telling me he was being the real Maddox.
At the beginning of the week, I tried to occupy myself with all of the paperwork and calls I usually have to deal with. Wednesday was the first night we opened back up for the week, and though I knew I wasn’t going to see Maddox anywhere, I couldn’t fight the nerves. But even more than that, an irritation started to build.
With no reason in sight for the way he acted and what he said, as the days have gone by, more vexation has grown. If it was all a game, why pretend for so long? And if not, then what was the point in doing what he did? They are unanswerable questions that leave me in a constant scowl, trying to come to grips with everything.
So, by the time Friday rolls around, any trepidation about seeing Maddox is mostly gone. It’ll be awkward, I know that, but it’s been six days, and I feel like I now need to know what happened. It can’t be that Maddox suddenly decided to resume his bad boy ways and
throw everything between us out the window. It can’t be.
Stephanie’s been hounding me all week that she’d be here tonight, and she is despite my protests. As the club fills up with guests, the early DJ who simply spins the popular hits on the radio plays the music. I’m waiting in the office, staring down at everyone, knowing he’s about to show up any second. He usually gets here about thirty minutes before his set time.
“You should just fire him,” she says. It’s one of the things she’s been telling me to do all week. The other thing she’s been saying is that I should throat punch him. I think she’s joking about that one, but I can’t be sure.
“I told you it’d look horrible if I fire him. Over what? Acting like an ass with me? Maybe if he did it during our business dealings I could, but what would I tell my father?”
“Make something up,” she says. When I look over at her to see if she’s joking, she simply shrugs. “Who cares? Do you really think he’d fight you on it?”
I take a deep breath, because when she first told me the idea, it did linger for a bit. It’d be completely unethical, but I don’t know if he would. Then again, I didn’t think he’d act like what we had meant nothing to him either, so what the hell do I know?
Walking into the club, everyone inside greets him with cheers, and he replies in kind, waving like the King he is. I half expect to see the girl with him, but he’s alone—a loose tank top showing off his shoulders and tattoos, with his hat on backward. Like he doesn’t have a care in the world. The sight, along with my own imagination, starts to build up the frustration again.
“I’ll be back.”
“No, wait.” She gets up from the couch, hurrying over to the door with me. “I want to go.”
“Steph, no. Please, just let me do this by myself.”
Her eyes linger on me for a moment with a concerned gaze. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
Taking a deep breath, I nod. “I’ll be fine.”
I don’t know if I believe the words I’m saying. Making my way out of the office, the music almost feels like a soft buzz. A light ringing as I walk through the crowd, blocking out everything except what’s going through my mind. I want answers.
Getting to his door, I don’t knock and wait. I go inside and stare at him; he seems confused. The silence drifts between us, and it appears like he’s about to say something. But he doesn’t. He turns his attention back to the phone in his hand, sitting on the couch, ignoring me.
“Seriously? You can’t even talk? You were pretty chatty last week.”
His head jerks up to say something, but again, nothing comes out.
“Maybe I shouldn’t be here right now.” I take a step closer to him. “Maybe I’m insane for even thinking that the person you said was the real you was the truth.”
“Well, now you know,” he finally speaks.
But I don’t know. I don’t know anything. “I don’t believe you, Maddox. Your friend is the actor, not you. You couldn’t have made all of that up. I refuse to believe you just happened to flip a switch—”
“Cece, I don’t care what you believe,” he spits out, getting to his feet. “What I told you last weekend was the truth. It’s better you just leave it at that.”
“You see!” I shout. “Right there. What does that mean? Why is it better? If it’s really the truth, why not explain it to me? I cried over you; do you know that?” My words force him to look away, and it confirms all of my suspicions. If he’s feeling guilty, last weekend couldn’t have been the real him. “But I’m done crying. I want you to tell me the truth, right here and now. Don’t give me some line. You said it yourself, your lines don’t work on me. Why were you acting like that? Why did you tell me those things?”
“You …” He struggles to get the words out, but shakes his head, staring down at the carpet. When he lifts his head, his face is wrought with … despair? “You don’t know everything that’s going on. That’s all I can tell you.”
“No,” I yell at him. “You cannot say something like that and just leave me on a cliffhanger.”
“It’s all I got, Cece.”
“Bull.”
He throws his hands in the air, turning away from me. “Forget it, okay? Believe I’m an ass or a conceited playboy or an arrogant rock star. Believe anything you want, I don’t care. Just leave. We’re over.”
“Maddox, don’t do this.” I reach for his arm to turn him around. “Why aren’t you—”
“It’s done!” he yells, pulling his arm away. “Okay? It’s over. Go back to running a piece of your daddy’s company, Baby Mavin. Leave me alone. You knew who I was when you hired me.”
I don’t know if he could do or say anything else that could slice through all my emotions and force a mixture of disdain and heartbreak worse than what he just did. From calling me the nickname I hate to telling me I’m basically running just another piece of my father’s business, or doubling down that it was all an act. That he was the King of Bad the entire time.
His words, combined with my new round of emotions, snaps something inside. I swallow down any pain I’m feeling, focusing on the animosity that’s rising.
“You’re right,” I whisper out. It takes everything to keep my voice steady. “I did know who you were when I hired you. And guess what? You’re walking out of this building the same way you walked in. As nothing but a self-absorbed, self-entitled asshole. You’re fired.”
I half expect him to argue. To tell me I can’t fire him, or that tonight’s show is just about to start, or to even tell me he’s going to sue my father’s company. But he doesn’t do any of that. He keeps his steely green eyes on me, and I watch his jaw clench. Then, with a curt nod, he hurries past me and out of the room.
29
Maddox
Getting in my Chevy Tahoe, my tires burn out in the parking garage as I speed away. I honestly thought she would’ve fired me last week, or that Leslie would’ve done so over the phone before I showed up tonight. I kind of wish she had. I thought I’d done enough last week that she’d believe me, but it doesn’t matter now. I think I’ve finally convinced her that this is happening.
And I couldn’t feel more horrible about it.
Driving away from the club, my first thought is to try and get lost and forget everything. I know Jade and Derrik are both busy, but I remember EJ’s out watching a show that Skye’s band is performing in. It’s in Santa Monica, so that’s where I head.
Parking outside for valet, as soon as I get out, I hear the words swirling around, everyone taking notice I just showed up. I try to play it up and offer a wave, but I really just want to get inside and order a drink already.
The loud whispers follow me inside, and I see everyone turning their heads. I search the small room, looking for EJ, but don’t see him anywhere. With more people realizing I’ve shown up, I look toward the stage and see Leah singing. Her, along with Roxy and Skye, all scan the crowd to figure out what’s diverted the attention away from the stage. Then they spot me. I feel bad for taking away from their show, so I head backstage.
That’s where I find EJ standing off to the side, watching the girls play. As soon as he sees me, he cocks his head to the side. “What are you doing here?”
“What? I can’t hang out with my least favorite band member?” I joke, wrapping my arm around his shoulders.
He stares at me like I’m crazy. “Uh, Luxe? Don’t you have a show tonight?”
I roll my eyes, shrugging it off. Damn, I really need a drink. “Naw, that gig’s over.”
“Over? You had one more month on your contract. What do you mean it’s over?”
“No biggie.” I glance around, trying to figure out the quickest way to get a drink. “Hey, do they have servers that come back here, or do I need to go to the bar?”
He grabs my arm, pulling me to attention. “Maddox? What is happening right now?”
I shrug him off. “I’m trying to get my party on, that’s what’s happening.”
Leavi
ng his side, I venture back out to the front. I do feel like a jerk for distracting the people from Skye’s band again, but I desperately need to get out of this funk, and I know only one thing that’ll do the trick.
“Let’s go,” EJ says, hurrying to my side, and ushering me toward the door.
“What the hell?” I pull away from him. “I’m not going anywhere until I get some—”
“You want to party? Fine!” he shouts over the music, throwing a finger in my face. “But I’m not gonna let you make an ass of yourself here while Skye’s band plays in the background.”
It’s not funny. I know he’s acting like the upright and honest guy EJ is, but I still laugh and ruffle his hair. The King of Bad mask is firmly attached tonight. “Oh, EJ, you’re such a nice guy.” The gesture earns a scowl from him. “Fine then, buddy. Lead the way.”
He turns back to the stage and nods to Skye, some sort of nonverbal communication going on between them. I take advantage of the situation to make fun of him again. I really am in a mood tonight. “You two are adorable.”
“Shut up,” he spits out.
After putting up with the screaming crowds when we get outside, EJ has the valet retrieve my car, and he gets in the driver’s seat. “I can’t be held responsible for what I do if you scratch my baby,” I tell him, chuckling.
“Wow, look at that,” he says, driving down the road. “You care about something again.”
He’s only responding to my teasing, but it hits a nerve. “Shut up.”
I have no idea where he’s taking us, but I know it’s not back to my place because we’re heading in the opposite direction. When neither of us says anything, he turns on the radio, and we drive for about thirty more minutes until we pull up to the Silver Spire valet.
I look over at him, lifting an eyebrow. “Seriously?”
“What?” he responds, almost rolling his eyes. “You wanted to party, right?”
The Silver Spire is one of the most popular and celebrated clubs out there. A-list celebrities are a common sight, along with some of the top-performing music acts holding parties and other functions. It’s not uncommon to see Grammy Award winners and Academy Award winners partying together, multiple times throughout the year at the Spire. The owners make sure fans are waiting outside, inside, and everywhere else. It’s a red-carpet-type event, where celebrities show up to take pictures and show everyone exactly how famous we are.
