by Anna Edwards
“They weren’t lies,” I stutter out before I have a chance to think about what I’m saying.
“You’re saying Nicholas and William held you captive for a year, and I didn’t know about it?” Victoria rolls her eyes.
“Yes,” I try to reply with authority, but I’m shaking so much I have to lean against a nearby bench to support myself.
Victoria rubs her hand against her forehead before stepping closer to me. I jump away from her and find a tree to support me this time, instead.
“I’m not going to harm you. We’ve both been through enough hurt. I don’t know for certain what happened to you, but I know it involved my father. He bought you that day. I saw it with my own eyes.”
“No. Nicholas did.”
“Joanna, please.”
“I need you to leave, or I’ll call for help.”
Victoria exhales an exasperated snort.
“This is my childhood home. Nobody here will throw me off the premises if I choose to be here.”
“Please leave.” I muster as much courage as I can and turn away from her and start to walk back to the house. She catches up to me, though, and places her hand on my shoulder. I can’t help the scream that escapes from my mouth. “Don’t touch me.” I push her away but then cower back when I realize what I’ve done. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
We are by the entrance to the house, now, and I flatten my back against the wall waiting for her fury to explode and the pain to start when she beats me.
“I won’t hurt you, Joanna. I’m not my father. He gave me away without telling me anything about what would happen to me. Do you know what I went through because of him? I was degraded in front of the society with a scold’s bridle on and nothing else. I was naked, and they beat me until I was left unconscious for a few days. I walked across hot coals, and I saw one of the girls put a pistol to her head and kill herself.”
I let out a loud gasp and grip tightly to my stomach.
“No.”
I want to cover my ears and shut her out. She was hurt, but now she’s okay. She’s not a broken liar like me.
“Do you know who saved me?” Victoria asks, but I only half hear her, and she knows it, so she grabs either side of my face and forces me to listen. “Nicholas Cavendish. He saved me. He’s a good man and is trying to rid the Oakfield Society of men like the old Duke and my father. He’s the father of my daughter, and I’ve left him alone looking after her at the moment. Would I do that if I thought him capable of doing what you accuse him of? Joanna, we can help you. Whatever it is they hold over you, we can put a stop to it and save you. You must trust me. We have to tell Theo the truth. We have to save him from doing something he’ll regret in the long run. Please, you have to listen to me.” Victoria is pleading her case to me, but I can’t do what she wants. I can’t. He’ll come for me—my father will know and so will hers. They probably know Victoria’s here already. I’ll be beaten … raped. I can’t. I need the normality of a life with Theo. He’s the only one who can take care of me—he’s told me as much. I have to support him and what he wants. He’s my husband now. He’s the only one who can save me, and in return, I’ll save him by whatever means necessary—if that requires me telling more lies, then I will. I’ll lie to save my husband because he’s the only man who’s never hurt me. Nicholas Cavendish isn’t the good man Victoria is making him out to be. He branded me: he took a red-hot iron and burned his society’s crest into my thigh. Would a man trying to put an end to the way his society treats women really do that? Theo can bring the society down. He’s the only one. He can get rid of them all, even his father. My brain flits between one fact and another like a washing machine on spin cycle. The confusion is rife in my head, but focusing on Theo is the one thing I can do to bring me clarity.
“Nicholas Cavendish and his brother raped and abused me,” I tell Victoria.
She lets go of me and steps back, and I see the defeat cascading through her body. She’d expected me to roll over and join her, but I don’t know if what she promises is real. Nicholas branded me, I repeat in my head to justify my decision. “Please leave.”
Victoria nods.
“I’m sorry, Joanna. I didn’t realize the full extent of what my father was capable of. He’s really broken you. I wish I could save you, but until you realize Nicholas is not the evil in this, there is nothing I can do.” A tear tumbles down her cheek, but I turn my head away. I must stay resolute despite the fact a gasp of anguish is caught in my throat, threatening to erupt at any minute. It shouldn’t be woman against woman. We are the ones who stay strong and stand together, but not at the moment. We are falling apart because of the society. Victoria continues, “If you ever need me, you know where I am. My door is always open to you.”
She starts to walk away but stops.
“I love my brother. He’s a good man who knows nothing of what’s happened to us. He’s the only innocent in all of this. Please don’t let it be his downfall. Protect him. Love him. He needs it.”
Her heels click along the concrete slabs toward the front of the house. My breathing quickens as they get farther away. A memory hits me of the present the Viscount gave me: the wig made of Tamara’s hair.
“Wait.” I call, knowing I should keep quiet but unable to silence my tongue from protecting another woman if possible.
Victoria stops and looks hopefully at me.
“It’s not what you think. It’s just some advice. Watch Tamara closely. I don’t know how key she is to all of this, but what he made me do… my captor. His intentions toward her were not honorable. I fear for her safety. Keep an eye on her.”
“I don’t understand?” Victoria tries to come back to me to ask questions, but I quickly run into the house and don’t stop until I’m locked safely in my room.
Chapter Nine
Theodore
The day has been amazing and beyond my wildest dreams. The people I’ve met on my father’s advice have been more than willing to join my campaign against the Cavendish brothers. I feel hopeful we can avenge what they put Joanna through and destroy their stranglehold on the Oakfield Society. As the car pulls up to my home, all I want to do is jump out and run and tell Joanna. She was so quiet after meeting Nicholas yesterday, and I worry intensely it has stirred up all the memories she’s tried to bury deep within her. On arriving back home, I allow the driver to open the car door for me, and as I climb out, I see my butler waiting at the front door, holding what looks like Joanna’s camera.
“Is something wrong?” I take the steps leading up to the house two at a time, my pulse quickening with worry.
“I don’t know, sir. The Duchess of Oakfield visited earlier. Lady Joanna left her camera in the garden when she returned inside shortly after.”
I take the camera from him and notice the lens is smashed. In another few quick strides, I’ve left my butler standing in the hallway, and I’m upstairs and outside Joanna’s room.
I knock lightly, three times, before trying the handle. It’s locked. Putting my ear to the door, I can hear Joanna crying. Without hesitating I dash quickly into my room and through the interconnecting door into hers. She’s lying on the bed curled up into a ball. When she looks up at me, I can see red rims of tiredness and sorrow around her eyes.
“What happened?” I ask as I place the camera on the sideboard and springing onto the bed, I bring her into my arms. She’s cold to the touch, so I pull the sheets up to cover her body. “Joanna, talk to me, please.”
“Nothing.”
“I know Victoria was here. Is she ok? Has something happened?”
“I can’t...” she whimpers and then goes quiet.
I pull her farther up the bed, so she has to look directly at me.
“You need to talk to me. I can’t help unless you tell me what happened.”
She tries to stifle a sob, but it comes out as an exaggerated breath instead.
“Do you ever wonder what it would be like if you were born into a different world
, place, or time?”
“Sometimes, but I don’t regret the life I live. I know it’s honest, and I try to do the best for those around me.”
“But what if it’s not possible. Because of fear, you’re too scared to even think about what the truth is and what lies are anymore. Knowing if you find out what you think is true isn’t, then you could be killed for it or worse.” I’m deliberately cryptic when talking not wanting to give too much away to Theo. If he discovers the truth of his father’s actions, there is a chance he could be killed. I certainly will be murdered for driving a wedge between father and son.
“Joanna, what did Victoria say to you?”
I gently hold her chin with my hand and turn her head from side to side. I’m checking for…I don’t really know what I’m checking for, but I have to know she’s not injured in any way.
“I want something different,” she replies and lifts her head up, so she’s looking directly into my eyes.
“What?”
“For tonight. I want to be normal. No hatred, hurt, lies, revenge. None of that. I just want to be husband and wife. We barely know each other. I’ve told you a handful of things about me. My love for photography and graphics but nothing else. I know so little about you other than you seem to have a passion for philanthropic work.”
“But Victoria being here? It upset you.”
She shakes her head.
“No. Not tonight. What is your favorite food?”
She shifts on the bed, so she’s sitting on top of the sheets. The color returns to her cheeks, giving them a rosy tint. Her eyes are expectant with excitement, and gone is the sorrow and fear that was evident in them before. She has shut away what upset her, and I know I’ll never get anything out of her, tonight. In this moment, though, I don’t care because I want more than anything to please her and make her happy.
“Filet Mignon.”
She rolls her eyes.
“Typical male answer.”
I bash my fists against my chest like a caveman.
“Man need meat!” I growl, and she laughs so loudly it fills the room with her delightful sound.
“Woman need chocolate.”
She copies my tone while beating her chest.
“I’d never have guessed.” I shake my head.
“But do you know how I like it?” she teases playfully.
My brain instantly goes into the gutter, and I imagine her licking chocolate off my dick before I drip the molten delight all over her tits. I’m a hot blooded male, and my wife is sexy as fuck. Not that I’ll touch her until she’s ready. I compose myself, but I think she’s read my thoughts because she blushes.
“With strawberries, raspberries, and blackberries,” she quickly adds to dispel all thoughts of my sexual preference for chocolate.
“Nice.” I snort a little laugh before reaching out to the phone at the side of her bed and dialing the kitchens. The chef answers straight away.
“Sir?” Despite it being Joanna’s room, she’ll not use the phone to order anything for herself, so he knows it’s me calling.
“Do we have any strawberries, raspberries, or blackberries?” I ask and listen as rustling comes from the other side of the phone while he looks in the fridge.
“No blackberries, but we do have the other two,” he replies after a minute.
“Good. What about chocolate?”
“What type?”
“Type?” I query before realizing what he means. I pull the phone down to my chest. “What type of chocolate do you prefer?” I ask Joanna,
“Dark, please.”
I nod and return to the call.
“Dark please. Can you melt it and bring some of those small almond biscuits up as well?”
“I’ll bring you a chocolate fondue platter, sir. I believe we even have some marshmallows somewhere.”
“Thank you.”
I hang up and turn my attention back to Joanna who’s moved off the bed while I was on the phone and has gone into the bathroom. Despite it only being around seven in the evening, it appears she’s changing out of her clothes and into her PJs. I get off the bed and standing casually outside the closed bathroom door, I shout, “Do you like sport?”
“Sorry?” she says as she walks out in her baggy trousers and top. She’s as beautiful in her casual clothes as she is in her smart ones.
“Do you like sport?” I repeat and lead her to one of the chairs in the room. She takes a seat, tucking her legs underneath her, and I pull a blanket off the bed and wrap it around her.
“I do.” She laughs as though enjoying a private joke, and I cock my head wanting to be in on it. “I was very much into sport when I was younger. My father got really angry at me, at one point, because he wanted me to do hockey or polo, but I wanted to play rugby. He threw an absolute fit one day when I came home and told him I’d made the school’s rugby team. It was all right for the boys at the neighboring boy’s grammar school to play but not me. I had to quit after a few games, though, having come home with a black eye. It wouldn’t have done if any permanent damage had occurred prior to me being given to the society.” She falls silent again, and I’m just about to tell her I preferred rugby as a sport as well, when there’s a knock at the door. I unlock it and allow the butler to bring in our food. Joanna stands and bows respectfully to him. He repeats the gesture back before leaving us alone once more. She looks between the food and me, waiting for permission to eat, so I nod my head at her. It’s the same with every meal even though I’ve told her she can start eating whenever she wants. She picks up a big strawberry and dips it into the chocolate before bringing it to her mouth and devouring the sweet treat in seconds. I can’t help but smile as I watch her.
“How about favorite animal?” Joanna questions me.
“Animal?” I screw my nose up. It’s not something I’ve ever thought about.
“Yes,” Joanna continues. “I don’t know why, but I’ve always had a thing for giraffes. I love their faces, and they seem really cheeky to me. They are majestic. It’s silly, but I just like them.”
“It’s not silly. Don’t worry. But I don’t know about my favorite animal.” I rub my chin while thinking. “I like owls.”
“Owls?”
“Yes, they’re wise, skilled, and can hunt in the dark. A good animal.”
“A prowler!” Joanna chuckles and picks up another strawberry. I do the same.
“What about the future?” She sucks on the end of the red fruit.
“What do you mean?” I swallow my strawberry in one bite and choose a raspberry next.
“Do you see yourself as just the future Viscount or something else?”
I breathe deeply and pop the raspberry in my mouth.
“I’m destined to be Viscount. I’ve seen how my father has run things, and I’d like to do some of it differently, but until I hold the title, I’ll follow his rules?”
“What would you like to do differently?”
Joanna sits forward in her chair, listening intently to me.
“You called me a philanthropist earlier, and I’d like to do more of that. Help people who haven’t had the privileges in life that I have. Victoria and I said as children we wanted to set up our own art school for people to learn to paint like all the great artists.” I go quiet for a moment and remember my carefree sister. Knowing what Joanna has been through, I’m desperately worried for Victoria. I want to get her and my niece away from Nicholas before it’s too late, but I fear I won’t be able to.
“I promise you, she’s happy,” Joanna states out of the blue and picks up another strawberry.
“No one can be happy with a man like that. It’s delusional.”
She looks down to the ground and places the strawberry back on the plate.
“I’m tired. I think I’ll sleep.”
Looking at the clock, I see two hours have passed with us talking and eating.
“One final question. This time, I’m asking it.”
“Ok.”
Joanna gets to her feet and comes over to where I’m sitting, opposite her. She places her hand under my chin and tilts my head up toward her face. Slowly, she leans forward and presses a kiss to my lips. It’s soft and tastes of strawberries and chocolate. I lick my lips wanting more of her taste.
“You’ll always be my husband. You saved me when no one else could.”
She goes to turn around, but I grab her hand and pull her back to me. My heart is beating so fast. I’ve tried to keep my distance from her, not just for her sake but also for my sanity. I must be wrong in the head. She’s a victim of abuse and doesn’t need me forcing anything on her so soon, but I want her. I want her in my bed, I want my dick inside her, and I want to bathe her insides in my cum until my child grows within her. I’ve never felt emotions this urgent and overwhelming before. Joanna Nethercutt, no, Joanna Hamilton, my wife, has embedded herself under my skin with her beauty, naivety, and a spirit so strong she could fight a million soldiers single handedly if she wanted to. I stand and pull her to me, so she’s resting against my body. My forehead drops forward onto hers and rests there a moment while our eyes look directly into each other’s. I shut mine and bring my lips to hers again. This time, it’s not a brief kiss but one that seems to go on forever. It grows more and more urgent as every minute passes.
Joanna whimpers under my touch, and I instantly pull back. It’s not a whimper of pleasure…it’s one of fear, and when I look at her, she has tears streaming down her face. I don’t say anything to her—I just swoop her up into my arms and carry her over to the bed where I lay her down and climb in beside her, fully clothed. Then pulling her close to me, so her back is against my chest, I hold her tightly until her breathing evens out, and I know she’s fallen asleep. I pushed her too far tonight. I have to be mindful of what she’s been through, and how it will shape our future life together. She may never get over it. We may never consummate our marriage, but I’ll be beside her like this forever. I allow my own eyelids to flutter shut as the exhaustion of the day washes over me.
