by Willow Rose
Now, as he drove over the bridge to Amelia Island, he felt a tingling sensation in his stomach. What if she didn’t want him to come? What if she didn’t seem surprised and happy to see him?
What if she told him to go back home?
That would just about break his heart.
Of course, she’ll be happy to see you. Why on Earth wouldn’t she? She loves you. You worry too much, Matt. You need to relax.
Matt took a deep breath as the wheels landed on the island, and he continued. He had never been to Amelia Island before, but so far, it had been a beautiful drive. Lots of water, marshland, and low-lying roads, and he wondered how they coped when a hurricane rushed through with the flooding and all. It had to be hard to evacuate the island quickly with all the bridges you had to drive over, and all the marshland that risked getting flooded. Matt had been to Jacksonville before and thought this would be more like that, but it was very far from the big city he had known. This reminded him a lot of home.
Chief Annie hadn’t even blinked when he asked her for a couple of days off. She had told him to say hello to Eva Rae for her — even though he hadn’t told her that he was going up there — and to make sure he didn’t do any police work while there.
“Time off is meant to be taken seriously,” she said. “You work way too hard these days, and you need to rest too, or you won’t last in the long run.”
So, that was his plan. His mother had taken Elijah for the weekend so he could go to Eva Rae and spend time with her, hopefully resting and relaxing a little bit. All he wanted was to be near her; the rest would have to wait.
He just hoped that Chad wasn’t going to be in their way. Or everyone else for that matter. Well the kids, of course, they needed her more than he did. But he could live with her attention going to them. It was their father that he didn’t want in the way of things.
Oh, dear lord, Matt. You’re jealous.
Matt couldn’t remember ever feeling this stirred up inside over a girl. Not since high school when Eva Rae dated Tim Spencer for three weeks. That was awful for Matt, and he remembered feeling like he was going to die. That’s how bad it was.
But he wasn’t fifteen anymore. He was forty-one, and he needed to get a grip.
Matt chuckled at himself and his stupidity, then let the GPS guide him across the island toward Eva Rae’s grandmother’s house. As he found it and drove up into the driveway, he was content to see that no other cars were parked outside of the garage. There were no kids running around outside.
And no Chad in sight.
Chapter Forty-Two
Is that … Is that … no, it can’t be, can it?
I couldn’t believe my own eyes as I drove up the driveway and spotted the red Toyota in the driveway. I killed the engine, sprang out of my minivan, and slammed the door shut behind me.
“Matt?”
He was standing on the porch, talking to my grandmother. My heart was beating so fast in my chest; I could hardly contain it.
There was no person in this world I’d rather see right now.
“Matt?”
He smiled nervously, then threw out his arms. “Surprise!”
“I … I can’t believe it,” I said and ran up the stairs toward him. I smiled and pulled him into a hug, then kissed his soft lips, closing my eyes. As our lips parted, he looked deep into my eyes. It melted my heart.
“What are you doing here?” I asked. “I didn’t expect you at all.”
He shrugged. “I had a few days off and thought I’d surprise you.”
My grandmother smiled. “I told him he’ll have to stay here at my house. Lord knows I have plenty of room. Especially since your grandfather died. I have to tell you that Matt here reminds me of him. When I saw him at first when opening the door, I thought it was him. Almost gave me a heart attack. To be honest, I thought the good Lord had sent him to come and take me home, but I ain’t ready for that just yet. Still got lots of good years in me.”
“I sure hope so,” I said, putting my arms around Matt’s waist and pulling him close.
“Come on in,” Eileen said. “Sydney and David just got back from the hospital and are eating in the kitchen.”
“How’s Adam?” I asked.
She shrugged. “Same, they say. But at least he’s alive, am I right?”
I nodded. She sure was, even though I desperately wanted the boy to wake up soon.
“Don’t just stand there and sweat,” Eileen said. “Come on in.”
Matt and I were just about to walk inside when another car drove up the street. It was honking loudly while I heard voices yelling. I turned to look, and my heart dropped for the second time this morning.
“MOOOOOM!”
“Alex?” I said.
The black Lincoln Navigator drove up and parked behind my old minivan. Alex was hanging his head out the window, screaming. As the SUV stopped, he jumped out of the door and ran toward me, arms stretched out.
“Alex!” I shrieked, then grabbed him in my arms and spun him around in the air. I closed my eyes and smelled his hair, then kissed him excessively until he got tired of it and wanted to be put down. I had tears in my eyes as I saw Christine and Olivia get out as well and walk up to me. I pulled them both into a deep hug, fighting my tears. I hadn’t realized just how badly I had missed them till this moment. I knew I did, but I had pushed it back, forced myself to not think about it since it hurt so bad. Now, they were here, and I could hardly believe it.
“What are you guys doing here?” I asked with a sniffle.
Chad came up behind them. “We missed you.” He spotted Matt, who stood a few steps behind me, then looked disappointed. “Ah, I see you’ve already been surprised. Guess he beat us here.”
I gave Chad a quick, friendly hug, then grabbed my girls in my arms again. “I can’t believe you’re really here. Gosh, I missed you.”
Then I paused. “Wait, what about the bunnies? If you’re all here, who is taking care of them?”
Chad leaned into the car, then pulled out a big cage. The children’s three angora bunnies were sitting inside, nibbling their hay.
“Ta-da.”
Chapter Forty-Three
It was going to take some time to get used to living there. Billie’s daughter, Robyn, had told her this over and over again; still, Billie wasn’t sure the move was such a good idea. She missed her home. She longed to be among her own things, her furniture, her paintings, and especially her yard that she loved to tend to on a nice day like today. What she wouldn’t give to be out there again, even if it was just for a few fleeting yet precious moments.
Life at the nursing home wasn’t what she had wanted it to be. It was good in case you had an accident and needed help, but it took so darn long for the nurses to get to you once you rang for help, it almost seemed like it was useless.
“Did you know I survived the fire in thirty-six?” Olivia, sitting next to Billie in the commons room, said. She suffered from short-term memory loss, and Billie had heard this story over and over again. It was okay, though. Olivia was sweet and always happy, and one day, Billie might miss listening to her stories over and over again.
It was the third stroke that had made Robyn start talking about the home. Billie wasn’t herself, she said. Billie couldn’t do a lot of simple tasks like go to the bathroom on her own anymore. She struggled to get dressed alone, and even eating was hard.
Still, being in a nursing home at the age of only sixty felt devastating. Was this what was left for her in this life?
Was this all there was?
Billie looked at the cup in front of her. She reached over and grabbed it between her hands. Shaking and spilling half of the liquid on the table in front of her, she lifted it toward her mouth, but she had to stop halfway since her hands wouldn’t obey. They wouldn’t be able to reach her mouth.
Come on, Billie. You can do this!
Billie exhaled tiredly. She couldn’t believe this was what it had come to. Her living among all these old
people, most of them who already had one foot in the grave. Was there really nothing more in this life left for her?
Reduced to a vegetable.
They had taken Billie into the commons room because her daughter was coming to visit today. It was Sunday. Usually, Billie preferred to stay in her room and not socialize a lot with the other inmates, as she liked to call them. Just like she called the home her prison, much to her daughter’s chagrin.
“I’d take care of you myself if I could,” she had said over and over again to relieve her own guilt. “You know I would, right, Mom? But I can’t.”
Because your work makes you travel all the time, I know. But maybe if you got another job? One that didn’t require you to travel? There must be plenty of nice jobs around here? Maybe one that required you to work from home? I took care of you when you needed me. When you couldn’t do anything on your own. Life is fragile; don’t you realize this? I know I did way too late. Don’t you make the same mistake. At least learn from what happened to me. We only have this time together. We don’t know when it’ll suddenly all be over.
Those were the things she wanted to tell her daughter but never did. Simply because words could barely leave her lips anymore after the third stroke. Still, there was so much she wanted to say to her daughter, so much it felt like she would explode from time to time when she tried but didn’t succeed. She wanted to urge Robyn to have some children, or at least to get married and settle down. All the good stuff. Not climbing the corporate ladder. Not constantly striving to impress her bosses and get by in what to Billie was a man’s world.
It’s not worth it. Take my word for it. None of that matters in the end. You need to focus on what’s really important.
A nurse approached Billie, then grabbed a tissue and wiped drool from her chin, then sent her a smile of pity. Billie felt embarrassed. She hadn’t even felt the drool. Just like she could no longer feel it if she had to go to the bathroom.
It was beyond embarrassing. Not being able to perform even the simplest task on your own was humiliating.
They had gathered all the inmates in the commons this morning. Some were just sitting by the big windows, staring at the road outside and the cars driving by. There was a group of inmates that were playing cards in the couch area. Others were playing chess or other board games. Some were just walking around, pacing, with nowhere to go, pushing their walkers in front of them. All of it was to pass time. Billie didn’t want to pass time; she didn’t want not to have anything to do. She didn’t want just to wait here till she had no other choice but to die, just to get out of there.
“Billie? Your daughter is here,” a nurse said, approaching her.
A figure came up behind her.
“Hi, Mom, how are you today?”
Billie lifted her eyes and met those of her daughter’s, then recognized the pity in them that she probably mistook for sympathy.
Robyn sat down in a chair across from her with a deep sigh. “Ah, it’s good to be here again,” she said and crossed her legs, a task so simple you would never think that someone would envy you the ability to do that.
“You won’t believe the stressful week I’ve had. Going from one airport to another, talking to people, riding in taxis, all the cars honking and sirens blaring when in the big city, you know? It feels good to be back and in here … in this place … it’s so, well … it’s so nice and quiet. Peaceful even.”
I don’t want peace and quiet. I want to be able to live my life and tend my garden.
Billie noticed a shape out of the corner of her eye that didn’t drive past the nursing home, nor seemed to stop at the entrance. She noticed it, and also that it didn’t stop. But she couldn’t say anything. All that came out of her were grunts. Seeing her struggle to find words, her daughter grabbed her hand in hers, then gave her that same pitying look as earlier.
“It’s all right, Mom. The words will come.”
The truck rammed through the front doors and splintered the glass, then accelerated directly toward the inmates where they were sitting in a cluster. Some screamed, others — the ones who weren’t in wheelchairs — tried to get up and run. But most of them were too slow, and only a few — the ones closest to the back — made it out. Those who were tied to a chair, like Billie, didn’t stand a chance.
Chapter Forty-Four
“Don’t take all the strawberries.”
Alex looked up at his sister, then reached over and grabbed the last of the strawberries and put them in his mouth, grinning at Christine.
“Oh, my God, you’re such an idiot!”
Christine yelled the words out so loud I almost choked on my pancake that Eileen had made for us. Alex whined next to her.
“Mo-om! She called me stupid.”
“No, she didn’t, you doofus. She called you an idiot,” Olivia butted in.
I sent her a look; saying was that really necessary? She answered with a smile and a shrug.
“Mooom?” Alex said.
I looked at Matt, and our eyes met. We had spent the night together in my room, while Sydney had moved in with our grandmother so we could be together, something I’d have to make up to her somehow in the future. I could tell Matt wanted to go back up there and close the door just as much as I did. I could have stayed there all day, in his arms, but the children needed me too. They had missed me terribly, and for some unexplainable reason, that always made them completely whiny, grumpy, and impossible. It was like they wanted to punish me for having been away, for forcing them to miss me.
I knew that they just wanted things to go back to normal, and for me to be there for them. But that just wasn’t possible right now.
“What a gorgeous morning,” Chad said as he stepped into the kitchen. He had been out running and was shirtless. It was obvious he had been working out since we were married, and I couldn’t help staring at his sweaty abs. Not because I thought it was hot, but because he had never had them before, and it made him look so different. He had also lost a lot of weight, and to tell you the truth, he looked great.
Matt saw me staring, and I let my eyes glide toward my food. Chad grabbed an orange and started to peel it, bouncing it off his arm a few times, and juggling with three of them first, making Alex laugh loudly.
Eileen had given him his own room, whereas all three children shared one. It didn’t make things easier.
To say that having all of them in the house was chaotic would be putting it mildly. I was happy they had come; don’t get me wrong, I really was, but it was just … a lot. Especially since I sensed this weird rivalry going on between Chad and Matt, and it was getting on my nerves.
After breakfast, I told Alex to go into the yard and play, to blow off some steam. Christine and Olivia went on their phones while I took my coffee and sat on the back porch swing, looking at Alex as he went on the old swing set that I guessed was there for Adam when he was younger. The yard had everything a young boy could desire, and Alex was occupied enough for me to get a break. Matt came out to me, holding a cup of his own, and sat next to me. I smiled and kissed him gently, then took in a deep breath, enjoying this rare moment with the man I loved.
I put my head on his shoulder, wanting it to last forever.
A sigh from Matt broke the calm.
“Can we talk about what’s in your room, please? On the walls and the desk? It’s plastered with articles and pictures. The back of the wall is filled with your notes in your handwriting, with bullet points noting ways to force someone to kill others and motives for doing it. I saw a list of the victim’s characteristics, race, gender, and age, but also marital status, job, education, criminal history, social media presence, pets, hair color, and weight and height? Can we talk about the fact that you were up last night on your computer when you thought I was sleeping and snuck back into bed before I opened my eyes, pretending like you’d been there all the time? I woke up at two and found you sitting there in the light from your screen. So, don’t tell me it didn’t happen.”
&n
bsp; I shrugged and sipped my coffee, then pulled my legs up under me on the swing.
“It seems a little obsessive; don’t you think?” Matt said.
I gave him a look. “What do you mean, obsessive?”
He exhaled. “I know I was the one who told you to try and help your family, but I didn’t know it would come to this. I didn’t realize you’d take it this far. You told me last night that the police think you’re seeing ghosts, that you’ve gone mad. Did you ever stop to think that they might be right?”
I scoffed. “Did you come all this way just to tell me to stop? Because then you’ve wasted your time, my friend.”
He sighed, and I looked at Alex, who had found a bat and a baseball and tried to hit it. I suddenly feared for the windows in my grandmother’s house.
“Of course, that’s not why I came.”
“Then why did you come here?”
“I missed you,” he said. “Don’t you get that? Can’t you accept the fact that I love you and want to be with you? Does there have to be another reason? Isn’t that enough for you?”
I sipped my coffee, looking into the black substance, then up at him again. “I don’t know. It’s just that … well, it feels like there’s more to it than that. You don’t usually do stuff like this, Matt.”
“Well, now I do,” he said as he rose to his feet and walked toward the door. “I don’t usually love someone either. You’re my first.”
“Matt …”
He walked inside before I could say what I wanted to.
Shoot. I hurt him.
“Look at me, Mom!” Alex yelled, then threw the ball into the air and slammed the bat into it, forcing it to dart through the air toward the neighbor’s house. I held my breath, waiting for the big crash as the ball went through glass, but it never came. Instead, it ended up somewhere in the yard, and Alex looked up at me.
“Moom? Can I go get it?”
I nodded. “Sure. Go ahead.”
