by Geonn Cannon
“Right.” She now remembered saying those things. They’d been sitting in a bar, nursing some kind of fruity drink. “Please, come in.”
They went into Dorothy’s hotel room and she closed the door. “I have memories of being here, relaxing and enjoying the warm weather. But I also remember the humidity of the forest, sleeping rough. My hands...” She held them out in front of her and stared at the fingers, which were now unblemished. “I scaled a cliff.”
Trafalgar walked to the bed and sat on the edge of the mattress. “Just as I know I spent a day tracking through the forest with Felix Neville. You also experienced the same day, with the same man, but it was a completely different experience. Two separate timelines.”
“So which one is this?”
“Neither,” Trafalgar said. “This is a timeline created because we never went into the forest in search of Captain Neville because...” She trailed off and gestured for Dorothy to recall on her own.
The memory arrived without needing to search for it. “We weren’t sent to find Captain Neville at all. We knew exactly where he was when we left London.” She could almost hear the voice of Bertram Rees as he addressed the Society members. “He was hunkered down on his ship. He would occasionally venture out to chase one theory or another, but always returned empty-handed. The members of his expedition abandoned him. One at a time, but then later in droves.”
Trafalgar said, “We weren’t sent to find him at all. We were sent to convince him to abandon his fool’s errand. Mr. Rees hoped to get his ship back along with whatever supplies Neville hadn’t yet burnt through. I don’t understand why we’re here now, though. What changed?”
“Neville received a mysterious note telling him where to find the Pratear. He was in front of the well when the anomaly was created. I believe he was the one who sent the note to himself. I stopped him. So he never found the Pratear, we never followed him there, the anomaly never opened. No airplane crash. No Burnt Empire.”
Trafalgar took a moment to process that. “But his obsession remains.”
“Apparently.” Dorothy chewed her bottom lip. “If we remember both timelines, then surely he must as well. He’ll know how to find the Pratear and everything we did will be rendered moot!”
“I survived longer than you did,” Trafalgar said. “D’janira stepped forward and embraced him. The...” She looked away and, for a moment, Dorothy would have sworn she was about to say ‘god.’ “The serpent descended on them both. I don’t know what it meant, but I have a feeling Captain Neville didn’t arrive in this timeline quite as intact as us.”
Dorothy joined Trafalgar on the bed. “You... survived longer than I did. That means you saw my death.”
Trafalgar didn’t turn to look at her. “It was devastating... A stone hit your head. It was clear that you were... The state you were in, I knew there was no...”
“Trafalgar.”
Dorothy leaned in and touched her cheek, then replaced her fingers with her lips. Trafalgar turned her head and they kissed. It felt like their first, though Dorothy knew how Trafalgar would taste, would feel against her, and she knew the weight of Trafalgar’s body on top of hers. When she pulled back, she knew that Trafalgar would lean in just a little as a sign of how much she wanted to continue. She moved her hand to Trafalgar’s jaw and used her thumb to brush across her mouth.
“I’m so sorry you had to see that. And I’m shamefully grateful that I was spared the sight of your death.” Her eyes stung with tears. “With all the awful things I’ve been witness to, that is one I don’t believe I could bear. And I fear we risk losing something very precious if we don’t act quickly. We don’t know if our memories of what happened in the other timeline will linger, or for how long. At the moment, I know that you and I have made love. I recall it very vividly.”
“As do I.”
“But as the day wears on, there’s a chance we might... lose those memories.” She leaned closer. “I would not want for that to happen.”
“Nor would I,” Trafalgar said, closing the distance to kiss Dorothy’s lips.
Dorothy grabbed a handful of Trafalgar’s sleepshirt and lowered herself to the mattress without breaking the kiss, smiling as Trafalgar willingly settled on top of her.
“Just for my own accounting,” Trafalgar said, “will this be our first encounter or our second?”
“Oh, Trafalgar, is the memory of last night already fading?” She kissed Trafalgar’s neck, her hands roaming underneath the soft cotton to find warm skin. “This will be our fourth.”
Trafalgar laughed and began pulling at Dorothy’s clothes.
#
Cora opened her eyes and stared at the wall of her library. Outside, London rain pattered against the windowpane. She was at home. She was in her comfortable clothes just after a bath. But a moment ago...
A moment ago, she had been somewhere else. She had been... dying. She put down the book in her hands and placed one palm flat against the bookshelf. She closed her eyes and saw a cave entrance, and she knew that her friends had gone into that darkness without her. Tears broke free from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. Her breath was difficult to catch as she saw the cliff face in front of her. She’d gone after them. She had gone into that pit and found Dorothy and Trafalgar.
“I didn’t leave them behind,” she whispered. “I found them. I may not have saved them, but I fucking went after them.”
She stepped back until she felt the wall against her shoulders. She either sobbed or laughed, either way releasing a new wave of tears as she slid down and sat on the floor. She didn’t know what had happened, not exactly. She knew there were timelines and consequences and new histories, and apparently now she was in a version of the world where she hadn’t accompanied Dorothy and Trafalgar on their mission. But she had definitely been in Brazil. She’d been given a chance to redeem herself, to live down her cowardice, and she’d succeeded. For the first time since losing those poor girls, she felt free to breathe.
“Thank you, ladies,” she said, aiming her words at the window. “Wherever you may be right now, thank you. God, thank you so much...”
She wrapped her arms around herself and sobbed, laughed, and let herself get used to the feeling of being released from her self-made prison. She didn’t know when she would go on another mission, but she knew for a fact she was ready.
Whatever the world might throw at her, she was ready for it.
#
“I believe the memories are already fading,” Trafalgar said, breathless, sweaty. “I don’t remember it being anything like that.”
“In a good way...?”
“In a fantastic way.”
Dorothy giggled playfully and let her arms fall to her sides. “Never underestimate the value of a proper bed when it comes to lovemaking.”
Trafalgar lifted one foot and wrapped her toes around a bar of the headboard. “Yes, you utilized this quite well, I must say.”
“Why, thank you.”
They were lying together like puzzle pieces, Trafalgar’s head on Dorothy’s shoulder. Dorothy’s legs were mostly off the bed, but Trafalgar believed her feet were dangling a bit. She was a bit cramped in her position, her knees bent so she could fit on the bed. They stared at the ceiling for a moment before Dorothy gave a weary sigh and sat up. She scooted to the edge of the bed and got up, pausing to work out a kink in her back before she walked to the armoire in the corner. Trafalgar rolled onto her side and appreciated the curve of Dorothy’s back, the span of her hips, and the muscles of her legs.
“You told me we were more than the sum of our scars. I think that’s true, but I also think we are nothing but scars. Some good, some bad, but they all combine to make us the person we end up being. We’re wounded. We heal. We change. Everything we did over the past few days... it still happened. It’s still a part of us, even if they don’t leave lasting marks.”
Dorothy paused and considered that. “I can subscribe to that.” She put on her underwear and began se
arching for a blouse.
“Where are we going?”
“We have to meet with Captain Neville. I know we’ve spoken with him several times on this trip, but we have to convince him to turn back. We have to bring him home or else he might get lucky and this whole blasted cycle will begin again.”
Trafalgar said, “Maybe it won’t. Maybe we delayed the birth of the anomaly long enough that the airplane won’t pass through it.”
“But who knows what other catastrophe might be caused? We have to convince him the search isn’t worth his effort.” Dorothy looked back at the bed and slowly let her eyes travel the length of Trafalgar’s body. After the first initial feeling of shyness, Trafalgar lifted her chin and accepted the examination. She was pleased to see a bright pink hue rising in Dorothy’s ears. “Not that I’m complaining about the view, but you might want to get dressed as well.”
“Perhaps I would be more persuasive to Captain Neville like this.” She lifted her arm above her head and arched her back. “What do you think?”
Dorothy grinned. “I believe you would cause a ruckus getting to the docks like that. Go on, get dressed. We have our entire trip back to London to be decadent layabouts.”
Trafalgar forced herself into a sitting position and searched for her discarded sleepshirt. “I look forward to that. And... what happens when we get home? When we’re living under the same roof on Threadneedle Street? I know you and Beatrice have a unique arrangement but, as far as I know, she’s never had to deal with you bringing one of your conquests home when the mission was over.”
“No,” Dorothy confessed. She looked down at the slacks she was holding. “I don’t know what’s going to happen when we get home, Trafalgar. I truly don’t. What you and I shared here is more than some tryst. You aren’t a conquest and this isn’t something we’ll just move on from. At least I hope it isn’t.” She finally looked up. “If you decide you don’t... that is to say, if you decide you prefer to be with men. I won’t take it personally.”
“I don’t know yet. Making love to you was magnificent.” She lost her breath on that last word, and it took her a moment to continue. “But at the same time, I don’t know if I’ve discovered something fundamental about myself or if I’ve simply learned something about how deep our relationship truly goes. I wouldn’t feel right usurping what you have with Beatrice for something I can’t even put into words.”
Dorothy returned to the bed and cupped Trafalgar’s face to make her look up. “I know Beatrice is an understanding woman. She isn’t jealous, nor petty. To be honest, I’m not certain how I feel about this new tangle, either. It could be something beautiful. It could be a brief, wonderful distraction. We’ll take our time to truly explore it before we make any rash decisions.”
“Kiss me.”
“Yes, Miss Trafalgar.” Dorothy bent down and kissed Trafalgar’s lips. “Mm. Whatever happens, I do hope those continue.”
“I think I’d find it difficult to stop.”
Dorothy brushed her thumb over Dorothy’s cheek. “Good. Now go... get dressed. I’m famished, and I want to speak with Neville as soon as possible.”
“Yes, Lady Boone.”
Trafalgar finished dressing and slipped out of Dorothy’s room. She realized as she crossed to her own room that she had no idea what time it was, and only a vague inkling of the day. She knew that, if asked, she would immediately say she’d spent the day before in the rain forest and then exploring a subterranean cave. But then she would correct herself. “Wait, no... no, that’s ridiculous. I spent the day sightseeing here in town, since the man we came here to speak to has proven quite stubborn.” She knew both things were true, but her mind rebelled at any attempt to reconcile the memories.
She also knew they had come to Brazil with Cora Hyde, but now she distinctly remembered being alone with Dorothy for the entire trip. She went into her room and looked at the bed. I slept here last night, she thought, even as her mind conjured images of lying naked on top of a stone bed with Dorothy Boone. She put a finger to her temple and shook her head.
In her time, she’d seen a great many strange and inexplicable things. This would just be one more piece of strangeness added to the pile. But she feared the memories would fade, that soon their time in the jungle and D’janira’s cave would be little more than a dream. It would be best to transcribe it immediately before she lost any of the details.
There were notebooks in her bag and she retrieved one, settling at the desk in front of the window as she debated where to begin.
We engaged a tour guide by the name of Marco Eiriz to take us into the forest. This was the same man who had taken Felix Neville into the wilderness and claimed he could take us to the grave of our missing colleague...
Chapter Twenty-One
Dorothy remembered two versions of the same event, and she parried against both on their way to the harbor. In one scenario, Bertram Rees was composed but concerned. He feared Neville was dead and simply wanted that fact confirmed so the RGS could close their books on the matter. In the other scenario, Rees was equally composed but irritation was the emotion he tried to conceal. He and the RGS knew Neville was alive, but the captain refused to respond to their correspondence. Rees hoped the Mnemosyne Society could appeal to him as colleagues and convince him to come home. The others balked at what amounted to a babysitting session but Dorothy, as de facto leader of the group, saw it as her duty to help out. Trafalgar agreed to keep her company. Everything else played out the same in both memories, and she was flustered by the overlap.
When they arrived at Neville’s ship, the Herald, Dorothy paused to consider the etiquette for boarding a ship without invitation. Trafalgar had no such qualms and continued up the gangplank with no hesitation. Dorothy decided she might as well follow.
The deck was littered with the debris of a man who had been living alone for too long: dirty plates, piles of discarded clothing, and other items put out in the fresh air so they wouldn’t sully his living quarters. The ship was silent save for the groan of wood and rigging. Dorothy examined everything as if she was seeing it for the first time, but she also remembered being in this very place the day before, and the day before that. She shook her head and hoped the strange duality of her memories would settle with time.
“Captain Neville?”
Something clattered in one of the interior rooms. Dorothy and Trafalgar went toward the noise and found Captain Neville on the bridge of the ship. He was unshaven, his hair long but mostly tamed in a ponytail. He was wearing a filthy shirt unbuttoned over an unwashed chest, and Dorothy grimaced at the sight of him. It was a far cry from the man she’d met in the airplane’s wreckage. The floor was almost covered with defaced maps, shredded pieces of paper, discarded journals, and bottles which were mostly empty, though some were still dripping into the garbage pile. He seemed to be trying to tidy up the area.
“Save your breath, ladies,” he said. “I’m sure you’ve come up with a very convincing argument but I don’t need to hear it.”
“Actually,” Dorothy said, “we were just planning to wing it.”
Neville gave her a distracted smile as he continued cleaning. “As I said, there’s no need to waste your time. I’ve decided to go home.”
Trafalgar said, “Really? Why the sudden change of heart?”
He paused and looked out the window, squinting in the sun. “I suppose your previous attempts burrowed their way into my brain, despite my best efforts to drink them away. I woke with a splitting headache, hungover, and nauseated. Some of that may be caused by sleeping on this blasted boat.” He grimaced at the controls as if only just now noticing them. He turned away to face his guests. “I had a nightmare. Probably the most vivid, most harrowing nightmare I’ve ever experienced.”
Dorothy feigned curiosity. “Do tell.”
Neville stared at a spot on the wall. “It was a swarm of unconnected images. I saw myself in the jungle. There was a massive construction looming out of the trees. Some sort of
vehicle, the likes of which I’ve never seen. I saw myself descending into a cavern, and a magnificent room with a pool and, in the center of the pool, a well. There was a woman. And, at the very end, a snake larger than any creature you can ever imagine. It was immense.” He held his hands out in front of his face as if trying to shape the image from his dream out of thin air. “It was a beast.”
“Sounds frightening,” Trafalgar said.
“I feel as you must have felt when facing the Minotaur. Awe, tinged with terror. And I knew that this creature, this god, was the true source of the Pratear. It was what I had been searching for all these years. I saw myself standing in front of it at last.”
Dorothy said, “And this is what convinced you to walk away once and for all?”
Neville focused on her again. “It wasn’t the only thing I saw, Lady Boone. I saw you. And you, Miss Trafalgar. And others, people I don’t recognize but who felt important to me. You were all dead. Your head was crushed by a rock, Dorothy. Trafalgar’s back was ripped to shreds and her clothing was soaked through with so much blood I thought it was printed silk. I saw only death and destruction in my wake.”
“That’s awful,” Dorothy said.
He rubbed his face. “I took it as an omen. I might eventually achieve my goal, but it would be terrifying in ways I couldn’t even imagine. I’ve never liked snakes...” His voice trailed off and they gave him a moment to compose himself. “I realized you and Trafalgar and the unknown people were stand-ins for precious things in my life. The things I was destroying on this foolhardy quest.”
Dorothy said, “That seems like a reasonable interpretation.”
Neville gave a barking laugh and shook his head. “To be honest, the dream came too late to save me. My savings are gone. No one will ever crew with me again after this. Several of them swore that to my face before they finally abandoned me. As for the Royal Geographical Society, there is no chance they’ll ever fund a future expedition.”
