She’d make supper. She watched Iris enough times. How hard could it be?
They ate in silence, and then Ross kissed her cheek before he left. It was so unexpected she didn’t know what to think. Maybe he was just a nice man? She’d make him something extra good.
* * *
Carter was tired, not one horse had wanted to cooperate. It sure was nice to have a meal in his own house to look forward to. What would she make? He smiled when he entered the house but it quickly withered.
Mary Beth looked worse than she had the day before when they were married. He’d never seen so many skillets and pots out at one time. She gave him a small smile as she pushed her hair out of her face.
“Just in time. Sit, I have supper ready,” she announced proudly. She filled his plate with some type of food and put it in front of him.
He could only stare at the plate. Most of the food was not identifiable. And it was far from appealing.
“Looks really good,” he said as cheerfully as he could muster.
“Go on try it,” she urged.
He attempted to cut into a piece of meat without grimacing. Finally he got a piece cut and put it in his mouth. He tried to chew it, and then he tried again. They needed a dog. He swallowed it as one big piece and swore he would choke and die. Finally, he could glance up at her.
“Well? Do you like it? I spent all afternoon cooking it.”
The look of vulnerability and hope stopped him from coming right out and telling her how awful it was. “I’ll just try the…” He hesitated as he stared at what he thought was a potato. “Let me give this a try.”
It cut easily, and it encouraged him. After all, how could a potato be ruined? He took a bite and fought to suppress a gag. It tasted like sawdust. It was so dry it left his whole mouth feeling dusty. He gulped down a whole glass of water.
“You got the water pump to work.”
“Yes, I did all by myself.” The pride in her voice was undeniable. “Try the peas.”
“Sure.” The green things on his plate must be peas. Though he never would have recognized them. They were still in the pod and mushy on the inside. Could he even pretend with the peas? He took a deep breath and quickly put one pod in his mouth, thinking he could just chew it real fast and then swallow it but the pods ended up feeling like hair in his mouth. They took a long while to chew.
“What do you think?” She smiled sweetly at him, and all he wanted to do was groan.
“I can honestly say I’ve never eaten the like before.”
A sigh gusted from her lips. “Oh, good!”
He frowned. “Aren’t you going to eat?”
“I’m feeling too full from the noon meal. I’ll have some later. I have to say it’s a relief. I thought for sure I’d ruin the dinner. Now I can’t wait for breakfast. No eggs, mind you, but I can come up with something, I bet.”
“I’m sure you will. I promised Max I’d help him make a cradle for Iris. It was great news to hear today.”
Her smile dimmed. Was she wondering if there’d be a cradle for her child? If there was a child, he reminded himself.
“I can only imagine,” she whispered. “Do you think we could go to town tomorrow? I want to order furniture and rugs. I’d also like to see about a housekeeper.”
He widened his eyes in surprise. “I already bought all I can afford. I can’t pay a housekeeper.”
“I don’t think you’re telling me the truth.” She smashed her lips into a pout, marring her fine features.
“What about you?” He stared at her middle. “Are you being truthful?”
She turned sickly pale. “Please leave.” She turned her back on him.
He took one step in her direction and then stopped. He had told her the truth of things. A man couldn’t spend all his money. He needed some to fall back on. He walked out the front door and headed back to work. She was spoiled and needed to see things as they were. She was a horseman’s wife, not a banker’s wife. He rubbed his hand over his face before he went into the barn.
Chapter Four
“You look like—heck, I don’t know what you look like. What happened?” Willis asked.
“Mary Beth cooked dinner.”
Willis’s laugh started as a rumble and then became so loud that Carter gritted his teeth.
“It’s not funny. I’m starving.”
Willis nodded. “Come on, there’s food at my house and an apple pie. We can work on the cradle another time.”
“Bless you.”
He smiled. “Bless Iris. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me. Come on, let’s get you fed.”
Iris seemed happy to see Carter. She looked him over. “Need to eat?”
He smiled and nodded. “She needs more lessons. If a man can’t identify a potato, then something is very wrong.”
Iris put her hand over her mouth. “It couldn’t have been that bad.”
“It truly was. The peas were mushy and still inside the pod. I would have had to get my Bowie knife to cut the meat.”
She smiled. “At least she made the effort. I wasn’t so sure she would.” She put the food on the table. “It’s still warm. Help yourself. So how long do you think I’ll be feeding you?” She gave him an impish grin.
“Maybe each cook stove is different, and she just needs to get used to it. And there’s always the bunk house. But I do thank you.” He shoveled the food in his mouth like the starving man he was. Stewed chicken with potatoes and carrots. Food he could identify and that tasted good.
“Perhaps,” Iris agreed. “And maybe she won’t take long to… get used to the stove.”
Was she laughing?
He finished up the last of his meal. “I should get back. I have spent little time with my new wife.” He stood and rubbed the back of his neck. He wished he could just relax.
Willis walked him to the door. “I hope you don’t get food sick.” He grinned.
“We ate some horrible things when we were in the army,” Carter pointed out and then shuddered.
“I don’t even want to think about it. Have a good evening.”
He stood outside for a while before he trudged to his house. He’d been too hasty and too greedy in his quest to have a home. But he was married for better or quite possibly for worse. He might as well get to know her.
He walked into the house and all the pots, pans, and dishes were still unwashed. Didn’t she know how to clean? He’d have to lower his standards a whole lot to be happy.
“Could you bring the tub in?” she asked in a somewhat regal tone he was coming to recognize. “I want to take a bath. Oh, and I’ll need hot water too. I wanted to go shopping today. These towels are not soft on my skin and this soap, well it’s not acceptable.”
He didn’t know what to say. He had been brought up to be a gentleman, but he didn’t enjoy being ordered around. Had she even said please? He tried to keep his face as expressionless as he could. He hung his hat on the peg and gazed again at all the plates and pots piled on the counter. He’d made those counters himself.
“I don’t rightly know what I will use to heat the water for you.” He stared into her eyes.
“Oh.” She frowned. “I didn’t even think about it.”
He went to her and took her hand, noticing the slight circles under her eyes. “Mary Beth, you look tired.”
Her eyes shimmered, and she stared at the floor. “Ross, I’m no good at this wife stuff. I’m so tired. I’ll clean up and have a bath tomorrow. I know you worked hard too.”
He furrowed his brow. “Was she really being truthful or was she trying to get her own way?” He wished he knew her better. “Tell you what, I’ll wash and you sit at the table and dry the dishes. Then I’ll heat water for you.”
She glanced up at him, and a tear trailed down her face. “Really? You’d help me?”
He tugged on her hand and seated her at the table. “Really. Isn’t that what marriage is about; helping each other? Besides, we have church tomorrow.”
<
br /> “I don’t go to church,” she said, her voice so low he had a hard time hearing her.
He started washing the dishes. “Why don’t you go?”
“We used to go when my mother was alive, but after she died, my father told me everything he had come from hard work not from God. I went a few times with Lexington, but that was only because he’d asked me to marry him.”
He handed her a plate to dry. “Maybe you’d like to go with me?”
“You believe in all this church stuff? I always figured it was because of women that the church even existed.”
“Did you believe as a child?”
“Of course I did. I suppose I didn’t see a need to pray. I had everything I could have ever wanted. Well, until I was thrown out. You believe, I suppose.”
Nodding, he smiled. “It was only by the grace of God I didn’t get shot down at the battlefields. When I came back home and found everyone dead, I had my moments of doubt but God forgives those moments we have. I think of him as a friend. I talk to him all the time.”
“T-talk to him about what?”
Carter took a minute to gather his thoughts. “Well, saying thank you for seeing to my needs, asking for guidance, asking for blessings on my family and friends.”
“You need so many things?” Her eyes held a lot of confusion.
Maybe he wasn’t explaining things right. “You praise God, and yes you can ask for things, but the answer isn’t always yes. I greet each day saying hello and thanking Him for another day. There is so much beauty in the world and it’s of God’s making. I praise him for his creation. I try to be a good person. Fletcher, Joe, Noah, and I drifted aimlessly for well over a year, and I prayed for us to find a place we could call home. And well, here we are.”
She continued to dry the dishes, then the pots and pans. She seemed to contemplate what he said.
Carter contemplated as well. They’d come to the Eastman Ranch for a visit never expecting to find a place to call home. He considered it a miracle, but he didn’t want to her to think he was pushing her to go to church. It was a personal decision.
“How can you talk to God as a friend? Aren’t you supposed to be on your knees when you pray? It sounds too familiar if you ask me.”
“For me it’s easier to pray throughout the day. Many do say their prayers at night on their knees.” He offered a shrug as he placed the last pan on the table. “I’m usually on my horse. I doubt God minds that I include Him in my thoughts throughout the day.” He dried off the counters and filled the pots with hot water. “I’ll go and get the tub.”
Stepping outside, he breathed in the cool air. He’d planted the seed, and now he’d have to see if he could nurture it. After picking up the metal tub from the side of the house, he walked back inside. She had the scratchy towels and the harsh soap on a chair. His lips twitched as he set the tub down and went into the bedroom.
“I have something for you.”
She smiled. “Really?”
He handed her a soft towel and a bar of lavender and basil soap. Her happiness had become important to him. It made him feel good.
“Thank you!” She lifted the soap to her nose and inhaled. “I’ve never seen soap like this! It has an unusual scent but I like it.”
“Glory makes it. It’s supposed to make your skin feel soft. Glory loves plants and making healing tinctures and plasters. Lately she expanded into soap.”
“That is so interesting. I’d like to talk to her about it sometime. She must have so much needed knowledge. I want to be useful in some way too.”
Carter smiled and poured the heated water into the tub. Then he pulled two chairs next the tub, placed warm water from the cook stove reservoir into pots and set them on the chairs in easy reach for her to rinse with.
“That should do you.” He nodded at the setup. “I’ll go feed the horses and give you your privacy.”
“Thank you.”
Who knew? She had a pretty dimple in her cheek when she smiled. What she had said earlier bothered him, though. I had everything I could have ever wanted. Well, until I was thrown out. She obviously wasn’t vested in their marriage. It was because she had nowhere else to go. Did she really think he was so gullible to believe anything she said? Her lies were almost believable. She couldn’t clean the kitchen because the smell of eggs made her sick. That was a lie. She didn’t want to clean. Shaking his head at his stupidity, he kicked at the ground. What was he supposed to do now?
* * *
Mary Beth stepped into the tub and tears started in earnest. She wasn’t the weeping type of person but she was today. Ross was a sweet man, and he should have a proficient wife not her. She tried the food after he left and she had to run outside and be rid of it.
What a fool she’d been thinking she didn’t need to pay attention to Iris’ lessons. She had wasted Iris’ time, and Iris knew it. She’d need the women on the ranch when the baby came. Before that even. But what was the use? A sob slipped out. She never was any good at making friends. She always pretended most people were beneath her. How was she supposed to go about it?
She’d go to church with Ross in the morning. All the other wives probably did. What should she say? Glory needed to be thanked for the soap, Iris for the lessons, Georgie for her hospitality and Veronica, well she’d tell Veronica her dress was pretty or something. She could do that, couldn’t she? Ross would be by her side.
She rinsed herself and dried off then looked down. Her belly was growing. She’d need new dresses or maybe the ones she had could be altered or something. She was useless with a needle unless it was a sampler. Needlepoint was a joy. Maybe someone could teach her to sew? The baby would need things, and they had no money.
If the rest could make do, then so could she. Would Iris be willing to re-teach her? Probably not. After pulling her nightgown over her head, she put her wrapper on. She felt so much better.
Now, what about breakfast in the morning? Ross must be thinking he’d made a huge mistake by marrying her.
Sitting on the settee, she placed a protective hand on her stomach. No one would harm her child. She’d have to tell Ross how the baby came to be. What if she couldn’t bear to have him touch her intimately? He couldn’t sleep on the floor forever.
She heard the door open and the tub being emptied. Finally, from the sounds of bumping and clanging, she knew the tub was being taken out of the house.
“Did the bath help?” asked Ross, his tone reserved.
“Yes, thank you. Is there someone on the ranch that could teach me to sew?”
“You seem to have plenty of dresses.”
“I’ll need them let out to accommodate the growing baby, and I want to be able to make baby clothes. I can do needlepoint, but it’s very different from actual sewing.”
“Georgie is a good seamstress. From what I hear, many of the brides came without any clothes, and she helped them. Are you on good terms with Georgie?”
“Another one of my many failings,” she admitted sadly. “I don’t know how to be a friend. I push people away, and I think most just don’t like me. I want to try to turn that around. I don’t know how to make friends. I push people away before they can reject me. I act like I’m better than others because I know they would find me greatly lacking.”
Carter sat on the settee and pulled her into his arms. She sat there stiff for a few minutes until she began to relax. Then she put her head on his shoulder and leaned against him. He stroked her back.
“You are not lacking,” he said, his voice soft and gentle. “The best thing about being alive is that we can make changes within ourselves. We can hope others see the change.”
“I didn’t take you for a philosopher.” She pulled back and smiled at him.
“I’m just me.” His eyes crinkled a bit as a smile slid over his face. “It’s getting late and you need your rest.”
She stood but felt too awkward to say goodnight.
“I’ll see you in the morning, Mary Beth. Sleep well.
”
She nodded and went into the bedroom.
As she lay in bed, she changed her mind a few times about making friends. Why was it so hard for her and not for others? Lord, I haven’t prayed in many years. I hope you’re still listening. I haven’t gotten to the praising part yet. I am thankful for Ross. I would like to have a friend, Lord. That is all. Oh, and goodnight.
Maybe this praying thing wasn’t as hard as she had expected.
The next morning she dressed in a pretty but less flashy dress. She could take the lace off the other dresses. Her stomach rebelled at the thought of making breakfast, but she needed to at least try.
She smelled the coffee when she opened the bedroom door. It smelled good to her. Ross must have made it.
“There you are. I thought you might be feeling poorly.”
“So far I’m fine. You oughtn’t to have gone to so much trouble, but I appreciate the sweetness of it.”
He placed a cup of coffee in front of her and then a plate with plain toast. “I wasn’t sure if I should put anything on the toast. We have preserves or honey.”
“Both please.”
He put the two glass jars next to her plate.
She’d never thought to make herself toast. She put blueberry preserves and honey on one piece and it tasted so good she sighed and closed her eyes. “This is great.” She took a couple more bites and waited to see what her stomach would do, but it felt perfectly fine.
“When do we leave for church?”
A slight hesitation in his movements was the only indication he’d heard. “In about a quarter hour,” he said after a moment then busied himself washing up the kitchen.
“I’ll just eat this one piece. I can have the rest after.”
“I need to get changed and we can go. Mary Beth, I’m glad you’re coming with me.”
He disappeared into one of the other rooms and came out after a few minutes wearing a crisp white shirt and a dark tie. He looked very handsome.
“Ready?”
She nodded and he went to the front door and held it open for her.
Faltered Beginnings: Mail Order Brides of Spring Water Book Five Page 4
