by LeeSha McCoy
She’s shorter than me, around five-five, has curly hair down to her shoulders, and her eyes are plain yellow because her dad’s from Caro. Us vampires always have the same colour eyes as our dads. My pupils are only red because of the noir magic I carry.
“Damn,” she mutters. “That shit is long for anyone.”
“Don't I know it.” Especially living in Caro. Malika has been gagging like crazy from the lack of dick in our lives, so I've had to spend a lot of time in Mirada to calm our feening asses down.
For once, I took mom’s, Ariella’s, and Malika’s advice. I spent time alone and quit trying to find love in everyone except myself, and admittedly, I feel so much better because of it. My confidence is up, and even the way I carry myself has changed.
I walk like I’m that bitch now.
It's funny how it works, knowing yourself and shit. I don’t feel as if I need to impress anyone to get attention, or have the desperate need to try and change who I am to fit in. Well, most of the time. I’m rocking a little disguise now, but that’s only because I’m undercover and want to go unnoticed.
Tonight is just about getting dick, not finding a husband. I’ve decided to go with the flow of life from now on and stop trying to rush everything. Mirada has been a godsend to the way I look at life. It’s so peaceful and calming, and it slows everything down and makes you reflect. Spending time there has made me think about a lot of things. Like the fact I’ll live forever, so why have I been trying to rush my life away?
I’ll have plenty of time to settle down.
I’ve been reading a lot, too, working on myself, and I even started learning swordsmanship. Now that, is thrilling. Who knew I’d be so good at it, too.
Having time to myself also forced me to look at my relationship with Qson. He was my first love, and even though we were only together a few months, I fell hard as hell for him. He was two hundred years old, built like a castle, and was so open sexually, it was freeing to be with him.
He was the first person who I could be my real self with, or as close to myself as possible, but little did I know, he was lying to me and entertaining other women. I only found out because I went looking for him one night and found him fucking someone in the palace gardens.
Dad almost killed him when he found out, and mom? Well, let’s just say she was less than impressed. Candessa made him think his dick had been removed as punishment, and he quickly disappeared without a word to anyone soon afterwards.
But as much as he hurt me, I couldn’t help but still miss him. He taught me a lot about myself, and as much as I wanted to, I couldn’t bring myself to hate him. I still craved the way he gazed into my eyes while he buried himself deep inside me, the way he asked me how I longed to be pleasured, and the way he never made me feel ashamed for asking for unorthodox shit in the bedroom.
Or wherever we had sex.
He encouraged me to be open, encouraged me to speak my mind, so when he left my life, I felt as if I lost a piece of me. Unknowingly, I’d placed my identity in him, and it was only during the deep conversations with Malika while we were alone in Mirada did I realise that.
I’m pretty sure it’s why I held onto him in my heart for so long, and why I looked for him in everyone else I met.
‘No one makes us who we are,’ she said to me. ‘And we can’t let anyone validate us either. We need to stop searching for who we are in a man and find ourselves in ourselves instead. That way, no matter who comes along or whatever they make us feel, nothing is taken from us if they leave….’
That statement made me see everything differently.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m far from done with my self-discovery and healing, but at least I’m on the right track now. When I wake up in the mornings and look at myself in the mirror, I don’t automatically start picking off all the things I think I should change about myself, thinking they’ll make my life better. I say thank you for all I am and what I have instead. I’m learning to love who I am.
I remember I’m a damned Princess who will one day be a Queen, and it’s about time I believed it.
I slip a little of my mom’s blood into my whiskey before taking a sip. It’s a little weird because it’s female blood and I’m used to using a male donors’, but mom thought it would keep me on track if I stayed satisfied on hers for the time being.
Hopefully, though, I’ll get some masculine sweetness tonight…
“So, how long you staying?” I ask Prima. “Has your mom told you?”
“She said a few weeks. I’ll be spending some time with your mom, too, apparently. Learning kingdom duties and the less commonly known laws. Mirada needs a liaison coordinator for the humans there, and I kinda volunteered.”
“Nice. You should speak to my Aunt Amour. She’ll give you the best advice when it comes to building a relationship with them. Humans aren’t as trusting as us because they don’t have magic, so you’ll need to interact with them differently.”
“Yeah, mom suggested that. I’ll see if I can talk to her tomorrow.”
“Alright, just be patient. She has a girlfriend now, and she’s grasping her increased magic, too.”
She smiles, intrigued. “I heard that. So, she’s really Aura’s girlfriend?”
“Yep.” I always knew my aunt was gay, but I had no idea that Alina was really Aura, or that she was her true love. They’re so cute together, especially in the way they blush when they kiss each other goodbye, and seeing how patient Aura is when she’s helping Aunt Amour with her magic is just the sweetest thing.
It must have been difficult for Aura to hide who she was from her for so long. It’s another thing that’s made me realise that timing is everything and that I need to have patience. I mean, Aura is thousands of years old and has only just come into union with her true love. That shit is admirable at the least.
“I love that. It’s about time we saw more openly gay relationships in the kratius, ‘cause we barely do.”
“Right. We should all be free to love who we want and not be ashamed of who we truly are.”
‘Look at you, giving sound advice,’ Malika says. ‘I never thought I’d see the day.’
‘Shut up—’ My attention diverts when a man across the bar catches my attention. His build is on point, his lips look succulent as far as I can tell, and skilful… I lower my eyes briefly to see if I can see any imprint through his robes…
I shiver when I do.
Lifting my gaze back to his face, his eyes tell me he’s from Caro. My favourite colour… He has locs, though, which is a little disappointing, because I can’t run my fingers through those, but still, that is me all over…
‘And me…’ Malika agrees. ‘Don’t you think he looks a little like that man you’ve been dreaming about, too? Maybe not as big, but still…’
‘Yeah, actually, he kinda does…’
Prima waves her hand in front of my face, cutting off my thoughts. “Girl, you didn't hear a word of what I just said, did you?”
“I'm sorry,” I reply, returning my attention to the specimen across the room. “I did say I wouldn’t be much company tonight…” I told her straight what my intentions were, so…
“Yeah, I know, but…”
Sexy-eyes spots me and starts to make his way through the crowds, so I sit up a little straighter, prompting Prima to follow my line of sight and realise what’s going on.
“I guess you’ve found him,” she mutters.
“I hope so.” I drop the silence around us before he arrives, and then I watch as he looks over my short hair and lips as he offers me his hand.
“Dagma, and you are?”
“Reese,” I reply as I sense his pire stir within him. It tells me it’s a go even before Malika tells me it is. ‘Just sex, right?’ I ask her.
‘Yep, and it’s been a few days for them, so they’re eager…’
Even better.
There’s nothing like a Caroian man that hasn’t been pleasured in a few days. They’re much more passionate
, eager, and rough. They try to keep their heads, but I always have a way of bringing out the best in any man I’m with.
Another thing I’ve recently learnt to be proud of.
“Beautiful…” His eyes wander, but so do mine, back to his mouth. There’s also the faintest shadow along his jaw, which I love, but as much as I wish he had a full beard, I don’t imagine him with one.
He is what he is, and I’m not trying to keep him. I don't want nor need a relationship. I'm too wrapped up in trying to find out what I want and who I am to be taking on the needs and wants of anyone else. I never thought I’d hear the day I thought that way, but what can I say. Mirada changed me.
Besides, I still haven’t given up hope of making it to the world somehow one day, because although I’ve tried to forget the idea of being dominated by one of those magical creatures, it’s been futile. If anything, the books I’ve read detailing their history has only fuelled my intrigue.
The libraries and temples in Mirada are full of stories about the great war between our kind, and I love the story of our creations. Especially Ariya’s and the way she took on Kietcha’s attributes. That fascinates the hell out of me.
“Would you like a drink?” Dagma asks, but I shake my head.
“I’m done with alcohol.” It’s blood I’m craving, and I hope he gets that’s what I want from him, amongst a list of other things. He’s undeniably gorgeous, and probably deadly, too, especially with those lips…
His eyes flash amber. “Is that so?”
Ugh, he's a little proper, but I don't plan on doing much talking, so I suppose it doesn’t matter. “Yeah, I’m actually starving.”
Prima snorts before getting up and downing her drink. “Alright, well, pleasant to meet you Dagma, and Ree, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I nod at her back as she wanders off, and then I look back at Dagma. “Did you want a drink?” I ask. Please say no…
He shakes his head, and it soon becomes clear that his pire is trying to hurry this along, too.
Good, ‘cause I've forgotten what dick feels like…
He offers me his hand. “How about a drink at my place?”
“I’d love to…”
Fourteen
Karrisee
Dagma and I have been talking for a little while over bloodwhiskies and fruits on his couch, but although he seems like a nice guy and is gorgeous to look at, Malika and I have realised we don't have much in common. He's clearly a fuckboy, too, but that’s fine, ‘cause we're not into projects anymore.
The only ones we’re trying to fix and build up is ourselves.
‘He's gonna make a move any minute,’ Malika announces, but I thought as much. I've been trying to listen to her more over the past month, and I really need to give her more credit.
She knows shit.
I hide a smirk as I sense Dagma’s unrest. His pire, Fersa, is growing impatient now, but Malika has been teasing him the entire time we've been here. He's done very well in his attempts to remain a gentleman throughout it all.
Clearly, he doesn’t want to fuck up his chance to sample this.
He rests his empty glass down on the small marble table in front of us and I know it's a go. My stomach tenses as he leans forward to relieve me of my empty glass. “So, tell me what you'd like to do now, Reese.”
I lick my lips in an attempt to buy myself more time. I'm nervous as hell, and the cramping in my lower belly is intense. I can't tell if it's attraction or nerves. “How detailed do you want me to be?” I ask, testing the waters. Men I've been with have always said they want me to say what I want, but then when I have, they've soon changed their minds.
A slow, seductive smile spreads across his lips. “Don’t leave anything unturned.”
‘Give it to him straight,’ Malika urges. ‘He asked for it. Besides, we ain't trying to bind to this guy, are we?’
Hell no.
‘Well then.’
I reach up to thread one of his locs through my fingers. Not the silkiest I've felt, but soft enough to add to the sensation when I'm riding his face. “The nastier the better is what I desire. Anything goes, as long as it feels good.”
His eyes flash amber. “A woman after my own heart. Undress us.”
I use my magic to remove my gown and his robes, then he leans over us, stroking his fingers slowly up between my thighs, teasing, missing our pussy and jumping to our navel to continue upwards, until he reaches our breasts. He uses his thumb to circle my hardened buds, sending tremors through my body, and I close my eyes.
“Harder.”
He obliges, causing my thighs to snap together firmly in response.
The hiss he releases tells me he likes that, and then he confirms it. “I can smell your arousal.”
So the hell can I. I’m not the wettest I’ve ever been, but I can tell from my scent alone that it has been a while. I can pretty much smell the desperation in it.
His other hand re-parts my thighs, and then he sweeps his fingers through my soaked lips. “Fuck.”
My lids lift when I'm pushed back so he can settle his face between my legs, and then his tongue delves deep between my full creases to explore me.
I knew I picked those lips well.
My pants increase with each sweep of his eager flesh against mine, and it's not long before both our pires overtake our bodies. I'm a little disappointed that it's not me controlling this, but Malika ensures the four of us are as much involved in this as possible. I can’t wait for the day we can merge, so we can both be in control.
“More tongue,” Malika demands, grabbing the back of Fersa’s head and grinding our pussy against his face. “Deeper, harder…”
The climax that torrents through us is enough to bring him close, so when we’ve come down and gotten to our knees, his length is already pulsating angrily and ready to bust.
“Use your fangs,” he orders, before I've even tasted him. “I like the pain.”
Our eyes practically roll at that confession. Shame we don't get on emotionally.
We seductively gaze up at him as we lengthen our tongue to wrap it around him. Damn, he tastes better than we expected, and we moan when we think about how his essence will taste on our tongue.
I hope he’s a good mixture of sweet and salty, with just a dash of sourness…
We use magic to caress his sack, forgetting in the moment that we shouldn’t be able to do that, but we always aim to ensure our sexual partners get the best time of their lives. His expression tells us he's questioning it, too, but he soon forgets when we bring him to what we know is the best climax of his life. The way he gasps and looks at us after says so.
Like he can't quite believe what's just happened to him.
“Where have you been all my life?”
“Around.” We smirk as we get up, but then he swiftly bends us over the coffee table, sending the candles he lit scattering over his amber carpet. We quickly extinguish them, not wishing to be burnt physically by this encounter either.
“I hope you don't have anywhere to go anytime soon,” he says hopefully, stroking his dick against us. “I need to make the most of this.”
We exhale as he rests at our entrance. “We don't.”
“Then, aren’t you lucky.” He curses when he drives his hips forward, and so do we, but it’s to ask for more.
And he gives it, making us scream out in surprise. Our womb contracts in mercy, too, so we quickly deepen our passage to accept his next stroke.
We needed this.
‘Yes we fucking did,’ Malika agrees with me, closing our eyes so we can buckle in for the ride.
“Your pussy is… I have no words. More?” he asks coarsely.
“As much as you’ve got,” Malika replies.
***
I stealthily creep out of bed, leaving Dagma fast asleep beneath his dark red silk sheets.
‘Last night was fun,’ Malika muses, reminiscing about us riding his face and almost suffocating him.
I agree. �
�The entire night was.’ Even his blood tasted good.
My thoughts run away from me, imagining what it would be like to lie with him again, but I reign that shit in. As good as he was in bed, and out, I no longer believe that I can change men into something they're not. Fierce attraction and good sex alone can't keep me tied anymore.
I need the emotional, and dare I say, the spiritual. I can't fool myself into thinking I don't need that. I want someone to be interested in my life, my dreams, my goals. I can make myself climax within a few seconds if I want to, and I have money, and magic, so I can get whatever I want for myself, so if it’s only sex alone that's being offered, I don't want it.
Yes, he liked me for me, physically, but I could tell by the quiet moments during our conversations that our opinions differed on many levels, so pursuing or seeing him again would just be a waste of both of our time.
And I might live forever, but time is still precious.
‘I’m so proud of you,’ Malika says as I wash and dress us. ‘I have waited in earnest to hear you think those thoughts.’
I sigh. ‘I know.’ I'm proud of myself for how far I've come. I suppose I should be grateful to Qson, Heiro, and all the others, because without them, I never would’ve realised that the real cause of my heartbreaks was me all along. Me and my issues, and all my internal beliefs that weren't serving me.
If it’s possible to find men that have pleasured me like Qson and Dagma have, I know I can find one who can give me that and more. Besides, there are billions of men in the kratius, so why should I settle?
‘Exactly, we shouldn’t.’
I'm not a bad person, I know I’m not. A little demanding, strong-willed, and a fiery temper when necessary, but even with all those traits, I still believe I deserve the best of everything. So, from now on, the only thing I'm settling for is my partner not being a werewolf.
‘Here, here. You're a Queen in the making, remember? You better believe that.’
‘I’m getting there…’
I take one last look at Dagma, but instead of leaving straight away, I decide to leave a note beside him on the bed.
