by Nicole Fox
Despite everything, I’m touched that Nana and Madeline came looking for me. If I really was in danger, those two would’ve saved my skin. Instead, I’m just being tied to beds and bathroom sinks by hitmen. Nothing dangerous about that at all.
“Gosh, my nana is such a worrywart,” I giggle. “I take shortcuts through the alleys on my way back from the coffee shop I visit. I ran into an old friend who told me about the shortcuts in the first place, and ... one thing led to another.”
I shift my weight to one side to let them see the outline of my hip, clad only in panties, at the same time that I let my thought trail off, hoping that they’re able to pick up where I’m going. It takes them a moment, but when they make the connection of why I’m staying in a shady motel, they’re both instantly embarrassed. Both men smile bashfully and look down at their feet.
“Ah,” the officer says, scribbling something down with a pen he pulls from his pocket. “I’m sorry for the misunderstanding, ma’am.”
“Don’t be,” I say, shaking my head. “It was honestly my mistake. I just got a little wrapped up and forgot to let my nana know where I was.” I give my biggest flirty smile again.
“To be young and in love,” the manager says awkwardly.
I grin and shrug, trying my damnedest to keep calm. I feel transparent and obvious, but as far as I can tell, the men seem satisfied with my answers. The manager nods again and starts to walk off.
But just as the officer makes to follow him, he glances at my wrist where I have my hand against the doorframe. I follow his gaze and swallow hard. The bruising on my wrists is even more evident now that time has passed.
He looks at me with a piercing gaze. In a much lower voice, he says, “Ma’am, if you’re in any trouble, nod once.”
This is my chance. I could nod and this would all be over. I’d be safely away from Roman and back to my normal life by the end of the day. No more hit man, no more bondage, no more fearing for my life.
But no more chance to kill Konstantin, either.
I make my choice. “What?” I give a little laugh and look at my hand again. “Oh, this? Well, I’ve always loved Fifty Shades of Gray ...”
The tension in the officer’s body relaxes and he takes his hand off his gun. Another shy smile. “My mistake. Sorry for interrupting you again, by the way. Please give your friend and family a call and let them know where you are, okay?”
“Will do, officer. And I apologize for having everyone so worried!”
“You have a good day, miss,” he says. Together, the two of them head back down the hall, talking in low voices. I close the door and press my forehead to the cheap wood. It takes a moment to get my breathing back to normal.
When I turn around, Roman is standing in the same place I last saw him, lips pressed together tightly. He looks at me with an expression I haven’t seen before. Brows slightly raised, eyes softer than before. Maybe I’m being presumptuous, but he seems almost ... impressed?
“What?” I ask, trying to bite back the rising pride I feel coming on. Maybe I did lie to police and throw them off Roman’s trail, so what?
“Why did you do that?”
The way he asks it, I think back to the night before. He seems just as unsure about me, wondering why I didn’t take the opportunity I had to stab him when he came back in the room. He sees me as a hostage, someone desperate enough to do anything to get away. Maybe I was at the beginning, but hearing him say that man’s name, the one who took everything from me, changed my perspective.
We’re in this together now.
“Because you can’t help me if you’re in prison.”
“Help you with what?”
I give him a look. He knows what I’m talking about. “I want to make Konstantin pay, and I don’t have the same set of skills that you do. I don’t know how to kill people, or transport bodies, or torture someone to get information out of them. I don’t know the first thing about that. What I do know is that something brought us together. Something put me in that alley at the same time as you. Something that wants me to end Abram Konstantin.”
Wordless as always, he simply stares at me. I’m suddenly aware that he’s shirtless, and I try to keep my eyes from traveling over his body. I do notice that he’s stitched himself up, though. Part of me is disappointed. That was another opportunity to touch his hard body. My nipples tighten at the thought, and I’m suddenly acutely aware that I’m not wearing any pants right now, either. I walk over to where I ditched them and shimmy my legs back into the fabric.
“You don’t trust me, Roman. I get that. I don’t entirely trust you either. You probably think I’ll turn you in at any moment, but you wanna know the best way to stop me from doing that? Let me become your accomplice.”
He laughs bitterly, like I’m some kind of child.
“You may not have anything to lose, but I do,” I insist. I don’t know the first thing about his family or his friends, but the way Roman talks makes me think that he doesn’t have many. Or any. He’s a lone wolf, looking out for number one above all else. “I have a grandmother that needs me. I have friends. I have things I want to do in life. And they’re never going to get done until I do this. I need this, and that also means that I need you.”
My stomach twists at the last three words, and echoes of my dream drift back into my mind. The way he touched me. The way his lips felt against my tender neck. I needed him then, too.
“This is a bad fucking plan,” he grunts, shaking his head.
“Why? Because you work alone?”
“Exactly,” he says, taking a seat on the bed.
“You don’t have to work alone anymore.”
He looks at me with contempt. “It’s on purpose. I work alone because I like being alone.”
His comment stings, but I try not to let it get to me too badly. He’s not outright shooting down my plan, so I still have a chance. “Do you know what it feels like to have your family stolen from you?” I ask. Despite the anger vibrating in every vein running through my body, I feel the ache of loneliness coming on. “Do you know what it feels like to bury your own parents, Roman? I was just a little girl when Konstantin took them from me. He ruined my fucking life. Can you possibly imagine how that feels like?”
He doesn’t look at me, and it makes me want to shake him. He’s still stuck in his ways, and by showing him how upset I am, I’ve ruined things for myself. Men like him, ones that take lives and play God, don’t comprehend empathy.
“Fine.”
It’s one word, but it knocks the wind out of me. “What?”
“We’ll do it.” I start to thank him, when he cuts me off. “No more talking about it now. Go shower and get dressed. We’ll talk about it while we eat.”
A bit dizzy, I give him a silent nod and hurry to the bathroom to wash up. While the water heats up, I stare at my reflection. There are still tears in my eyes, but for the first time in months, they’re not bitter.
I’m almost there.
***
Roman looks out of his element at the diner a few blocks away from the motel. He shifts in his seat uncomfortably, glancing around whenever there’s a clang of pans or scooting noise of chairs. But more than that, he looks uncomfortable simply being around me.
I try not to let it offend me. After all, he just agreed to let me help with his hit on Konstantin. It’d be ungrateful to throw a fit. Still, after the dream I had last night, it’s a bit of slap in the face to see him so uneasy in my presence.
To distract myself, I cut into a pancake and swirl it around in syrup. That sandwich last night barely put a dent in my hunger, and I ended up tied to the bed before I could even finish. It’s almost embarrassing how quickly I eat. Almost.
“You were kind of vague about what this assignment is,” I note.
“There’s not much to discuss. I’m supposed to kill Abram Konstantin. He’s got ties to the mob. He works in real estate. He also has a history of shady dealings and lawsuits that keep getting shoved unde
r the rug.”
That’s an understatement. Konstantin’s gotten away with murder, and not just with my family. In high school, he became an obsession of mine. I kept alerts on my cell phone, always waiting to find out something new about him. After getting away scot-free with murdering my parents, Konstantin had plenty of other run-ins with the law. Faulty concrete foundations that sent children falling to their death in the basement. Poor wiring that electrocuted many pets. He even managed to avoid a sexual assault scandal with one of the women living in his apartment buildings. And that’s just the stuff that made the news. City message boards sometimes hinted at much darker stuff. Guns, drugs, weapons, women being bought and sold. Nothing that could ever be proven, but the whispers I found were too persistent to be completely fabricated.
His reign of terror is well-documented.
“I’m glad he’s on your list,” I mutter.
Roman looks up from his plate of bacon at me. “Do you really mean that?”
“Seriously?” I ask. “That bastard is the reason I grew up without parents. Nobody in this town held him accountable, and look what happened afterwards. So many others were hurt. And him? He got off without more than a slap on the wrist. Knowing that someone is finally taking care of him is the best news I’ve heard all year.”
“Okay,” he says, conceding. “So what can you do? On the way here, you were talking about guns, right? You ever shoot one?”
I blush and occupy myself with eating. During the ride to the diner, I did end up getting a bit overzealous, going into detail about everything I knew about a line of business similar to Roman’s. The information came out of me without a filter. I told him I knew plenty of ways to kill people and make it look like an accident. How to work a gun. How long it takes to strangle someone, contrary to what television and movies portray. He listened without interruption, but in hindsight, it was probably amateurish to be so excited.
If only he knew that it was all based on a lifetime of reading true crime novels.
“No,” I admit, finally meeting his gaze. “I haven’t used a gun. But I write crime fiction. I have to know these kinds of things.”
“You never told me about that.”
“You put a gag in my mouth the first time we met,” I remind him.
That smirk returns, just for an instant, before disappearing again. “You were too busy screaming to mention what you did in your spare time.”
“Regardless,” I say, biting back a smile, “I’ve always loved the research. Learning about cases, finding out how the police discovered the truth. It’s enthralling, to say the least. And then I met you.”
The words come out more wistfully than I mean, and I quickly stutter out, “I mean, you ... y’know, take care of people. And you get away with it. I’m fascinated. I want to know how you do it. How you got so good at it. How did you train for this?”
Roman’s face hardens, and I can practically see him receding back into his shell. That momentary warm, the brief glimpse of his smile, is fading before my eyes. “I’m going to tell you right now, Lucy: I’m not talking about my past. I don’t care if you want to know for your books. Stop asking me.”
There’s no room for negotiation with him. It’s probably best not to push him. He’s already given me an inch, and here I am trying to take a yard. “Sorry,” I murmur, stabbing at my scrambled eggs. The air in the room is heavy, and I try my hardest to circle back to his assignment.
“Can you tell me about Mr. X? What’s he like? Is he a James Bond villain?”
“I don’t know much about him,” he admits. “I met him through a previous client. He pays twice as well. I don’t ask questions for paychecks that large.”
“Smart,” I say.
“He’s Russian. I know that much. If I had to guess, I’d say this assignment is about getting rid of the competition. Konstantin being part of the Bratva means he’s more than likely stepping on X’s toes. He doesn’t like people getting in his way. He’s had me kill people over smaller crimes.”
This is so surreal to hear about. “I’m on Mr. X’s side with this one.”
He practically scoffs. “You wouldn’t be saying that if you knew the things he does.”
“Let’s hope I never do then,” I say, trying not to shudder at the thought. Just the description of the mysterious man unsettles me. “How long do you think it will take to handle Konstantin?”
“Not long. Standard hit. In and out.”
“I wish I could be there.”
This gives Roman pause. “Seeing this kind of shit changes you, Lucy. You don’t want to see what happens to people when they die.”
“I already have, in the alley. I didn’t know that man, but I saw him go. That’s too merciful for Konstantin. He deserves a slow death. For all the people that he’s hurt in his life. All the bodies that are in the ground because of him.”
I don’t realize how hard I’m gripping my fork until my hand aches. Roman’s eyes fall to my hand, and I loosen up, putting it down on the table.
“You hate him,” he says simply.
“More than anyone else in this world.”
“Then I’ll make it painful for him.”
What kind of person would I be to admit that I’m touched by the offer? ‘Make it painful’... Have I lost all sense of humanity? Have I become as cold and emotionless as the man sitting across from me? The thought of being so stoic sends a chill through my spine, but I can’t deny that this is what I’ve wanted for so long. I thought I wanted justice, but that’s not it at all. Justice would be locking Abram Konstantin in prison for the rest of his life, and the thought of that isn’t enough.
I don’t want justice. I want something more.
“You should go outside and call your grandmother. Let her know that you’ll be busy for the next few days.” He slides his phone across the table. I pick it up and begin sliding out of the seat. Before I can get very far, he puts his hand on top of mine. His palm nearly covers my entire hand, and I feel the heat of his fingers wrap around my wrist.
His eyes stab straight into mine. I can’t read the emotion behind them. He doesn’t blink or say anything for a long moment. “I’m trusting you, Lucy.”
I know what he’s saying. Don’t pull another stunt like the knife back in the motel room. He doesn’t know me, but he’s trusting me enough not to let him down again. I don’t know why, but I nod, suddenly filled with the desire to please him. I don’t want to screw this up. I don’t have any plans on calling someone else or reading his messages.
Something tells me he doesn’t say that often. Knowing that, I try not to smile too wide. “I won’t. I’ll be back.”
I grab the phone and pull away, telling myself that I shouldn’t want to stay there, his hand on mine. When I step outside, I walk around the corner of the building so I have a bit of privacy. When I dial Nana’s number, she answers on the second ring.
“Hello?”
“Nana, it’s me.”
“Oh my gosh, Lucy! I’ve been so worried about you. Where have you been? Please tell me you’re all right!”
Hearing her concern almost makes me cry. The thought of worrying her to the point of visiting the police station with Madeline makes me feel guiltier than anything else has in a long time. “I didn’t mean to worry you, Nana,” I say. “I met up with an old friend and we decided to reconnect.”
“Is it a man?”
And just like that, I’m laughing again. Of course. The mere mention of me meeting a man is enough to make her forget that I’ve been missing for twenty-four hours. “Maybe,” I say bashfully.
“What’s he like?” she asks.
“He’s ... a mystery. But so far, he’s been nice to me. It’s good getting to know him ... again.”
“Well, I for one am so happy that you’re starting to date again. I’m sure your boss won’t be happy that you blew off work for this, but ...”
“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” I say. “This new guy offered me a j
ob, a writing gig, and I really want to do it. I know Rudy is going to be mad, but I think I should follow through with this. This’ll be my first big project.”
I need an excuse for why I won’t be home for the foreseeable future, otherwise I’ll be in another situation with the people that love me sending the police to come and find me. “Sweetheart, what is your heart telling you to do?”
I choose my words carefully. “It says that I’m exactly where I need to be. That I should take this job because it’s the only opportunity I’ll have to do this.”
“Then that’s what you should do,” she says. One thing I’ve always loved about Nana is how easily her opinions come. She follows her heart a lot of the time, trusting her gut over everyone else, and all her life, she’s been right to do so.
“Okay,” I say, leaning against the wall. “I promise I’ll call you back and keep you updated on everything, okay?”
“All right, sweetheart. You be safe, and you two have fun. I love you.”
“I love you too, Nana.”
When I end the call, I place the phone to my heart and take a deep breath. It hurts having to keep her in the dark, but I know if she ever found out what I was planning to do with Roman, she’d try and talk me out of it. I know that she wants justice, but she’s moved on from what happened to Mom and Dad. I haven’t.
And now I finally have the chance to do something. I’m not just sitting around, waiting for someone to finally make Konstantin take responsibility. With Roman, I have the chance to play an active role in getting revenge. It may hurt being away from Nana and Madeline for so long, but that’s a price I’m willing to pay.
I won’t let anything stop me from doing this.
Chapter Eight
Roman
There’s a voice in the back of my head telling me how stupid this is. How fucked everything is going to be. Lucy is a distraction, especially when she looks at me like she did when I told her that I’d let her help. If Mr. X finds out about this, he’ll probably send someone after me the way he’s sent me after people that upset him.
