The Run Around

by Bernadette Franklin

  “That depends. Will the firms cooperate when we request more information on ambiguous invoices?”

  “That remains to be seen.”

  “It’s a part of the job, but truth be told? It’s a part I dislike. Can I deal with it? Yes. It’s necessary, especially if the firm wants to survive an IRS audit without losing their shirts to fines and penalties.”

  “Thank you, Miss Kensingvale. If you’ll follow me, I’ll show you to the reception. I don’t expect this evaluation will take too long before we can get back to business.”

  Back in the reception, I considered returning to The Art of War, but I decided on lighter reading.

  If Florida Man couldn’t distract me, nothing could.

  The news sites didn’t disappoint, and I emailed myself links to the best articles, expecting Rick had already seen them. Fortunately, thanks to planning my brother’s wedding, I had Rick’s phone number and his email address.

  I could be brave and bold, and I could be friends with my brother’s friend. I didn’t need Mat’s permission or blessing.

  I dug through my contacts for Rick’s email address, and I picked my favorite of the headlines.

  Florida Man, upset over the circumstances of his birth, had assaulted his father with a pizza. Compared to the other candidates, he came across as mostly harmless, hilariously funny, and out of his right mind without really hurting anyone. Well, beyond a few of my brain cells, which died terrible deaths trying to comprehend why someone would beat his father for being involved with his birth.

  Something about sending the email put me at ease, and I spent the rest of the wait smiling while browsing the internet in search of an even better article.

  “Miss Kensingvale?” Garret asked.

  According to my phone, I’d spent almost an hour and a half reading news articles, likely grinning like an idiot. I stowed my phone in my purse, rose, and kept on smiling. “Hope, please.”

  “Come this way. I apologize it took longer than anticipated.”

  “It’s no problem at all.” I fell into step with him, and we returned to the conference room.

  We were alone, and I remembered he’d claimed to discuss my odd interview with others. At his invitation, I took a seat.

  “We spoke to some of your other contacts,” he announced, sitting across the table from me.

  I saw writing on the wall, but I had no idea what it said. “Well, this is either about to go really good or really badly.”

  Humor wouldn’t lose me the interview if I’d already lost it in the first and strange part of the process. I’d be disappointed, but New York firms big and small needed accountants, and I’d get hired by someone eventually.

  My plan would still work.

  “Well, one of your references told me, without preamble, I’d be a bloody idiot if I didn’t hire you, and that he resented losing you to me. I asked if he was one of the clients you worked for after hours, and when he confirmed that, I did reassure him you could continue your work with him. He then informed me that I might do. As what, I’m not sure.”

  Of my friends, Wolfgang would have pulled a stunt like that. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to thank him, smack him, or find some other way to get some payback. “That would be Wolfgang. He’s one of two candidates who would resent something like that, but he’s also vocal with a protective streak.”

  Garret chuckled. “You would be correct. We appreciate your strong relationship with your clients, and your previous employer informed me he’d taken steps trying to keep you. His sentiments were similar. That’s, honestly, why we skipped the traditional first part of our interview and went straight to the logic test.”

  Ah. I’d have to thank Wolfgang and the others I’d used as references.

  “Is it bad form for me to admit I actually like this style of interview better?”

  “Not at all. We prefer seeing a potential employee in action. Your logical and methodical approach to seeing the file for the first time is required for this sort of auditing work. Your education is what we’re looking for, you have the appropriate licenses in New York, and your ability to prepare for relocation on short notice is exactly what we need. When can you be ready for a full move?”

  “My apartment is packed and in storage already. I moved out on Wednesday, as I planned on moving to New York City anyway. I’m currently staying in a hotel down the street, but I will be looking for an apartment soon.”

  “We’ll expense your hotel as part of your hiring bonus.” Garret reached down, retrieved a briefcase, and opened it, pulling out a folder filled with papers. “Here is our hiring proposal.”

  Well, so much for the second discussion and portion of the interview. I took the folder, opened it, and began to read.

  From everything I’d read, survival in Manhattan required at least fifty thousand a year, and that was only if I found an apartment with a roommate. Living on my own would require over a hundred thousand. Cercson Investment Group wanted to pay me just shy of one-ninety, and I’d be salaried with overtime pay should my hours exceed forty a week. My brows rose at that, as most firms used salaries to bleed employees dry. Everything else about the company seemed standard with the exception of parking; a reserved spot would be made available for my use in the building’s garage at no extra fee to me. The thirty thousand dollar hiring bonus, paid out in cash and calculated to be after taxes, would make my life a lot easier while settling in the city. Three weeks of paid vacation and ten sick days transformed the offer into my personal slice of heaven.

  Who knew hard work could actually pay off?

  To sweeten the pie, I would have access to a financial manager to handle investments, and the company matched retirement investments handled through them.

  I would have to thank my brother at some point for pissing me off enough to bail town and find better waters. All things considered, I saw no need to do much negotiation, although I had one thing on my adult wishlist I’d add. “Would the company be willing to help me find an apartment that would allow a dog?”

  “We’re a dog-friendly employer. Assuming your dog is trained, you are welcome to bring the animal to work on days you’re not required to leave for meetings. Some of our contacts welcome dogs as well, but that’s case-by-case.”

  I foresaw a dog in my future, one as cute, fluffy, and lovable as Rick’s. “I don’t have a dog yet, as one wasn’t an option in my previous apartment.”

  Garret smiled. “We’re used to accommodating pet owners moving into the area, so this is no issue.”

  I flipped through the pages to locate where I needed to sign over my soul for a chance at a good, challenging job that paid me closer to what I deserved. I swiped the nearest pen, gave it a click, and signed. “As I have successfully negotiated for the ability to have a dog, I’m quite pleased about this proposal.”

  My new boss—or, who I assumed would be my new boss—chuckled. “Considering I managed to finagle a range for your old salary out of your former employer, I thought you’d enjoy our proposal. It’s a tough job, but we try to make sure the pay justifies the headaches.”

  “So far, the headaches seem comparable,” I admitted.

  “That’s what I gathered after listening to your previous job description. Frankly, your tolerance for an intense work schedule was what bumped you to the front of our list. In our line of work, flexibility is needed. We never know who is going to walk through our door with a proposal, and sometimes, those proposals take us all over the world.”

  That caught my attention. “It does?”

  “Yes. There are many companies who wish to move into New York City and need to know the legal and financial ramifications of such a choice. I’ve found sending our negotiators with an accountant makes the process go much smoother. People like you are the financial heart of an investment group. You see all the numbers other departments sometimes miss—and you know how the money flows. So, we’d be foolish to exclude accountants from such ventures. I do wish we’d been better named for what
we actually do. Auditing challenges are only a small part of our firm’s operations, albeit a critical one. I think you’ll find your job challenging but rewarding, especially as we issue corporate cards for travel so you don’t have to worry about filing as many expense reports. Accounting likes when we have nice, neat, easily tracked credit cards assigned to employees for tracking expenses. We do require expense sheets be turned in that match the expenses on the card, but it’s much easier on the accounting at the end of the year this way.”

  I wanted to cry from joy. “You concentrate the expenses to credit cards?”

  Garret’s smile widened to a grin. “I do love the moment an accountant realizes we’ve significantly simplified certain elements of their work. We do. We consolidate many expenses to be easily tracked. Every corporate card is linked to only one employee, and we have an accountant who checks all credit expenses every week to make certain there is nothing fraudulent. We allow traveling employees up to thirty days to turn in expense sheets, but we do confirm what expenditures are going through on a weekly basis. We try to avoid issues.”

  I slid over the signed papers and matched his grin. “I think I’m going to like it here, Garret.”

  “As do I. Welcome aboard, Hope.”

  Seven

  You should get a nicer model and buy yours new.

  Signing the hiring proposal started a frenzy of activity, and after two more hours, three meetings with various members of HR, and all the other little things required to hire me in the state of New York, I secured full-time employment. I handed over the key to my storage box, which would be emptied and transferred to my new apartment in New York.

  On Monday evening, I had a date with one of their real estate agents, who’d help me find a place within my budget.

  Once finished with the necessities to be employed, I hiked to my hotel, grabbed a quick bite to eat on the way, and flopped in front of my laptop, checking my email to see what disasters waited for me.

  I ignored the email from my brother, wrinkling my nose at the [no subject] gracing his entry. I’d long-since turned previewing off so I could scan more emails with ease. He likely wanted to know where I was and why I’d changed my number and otherwise refused to speak to him.

  He’d probably figure it out in a week or two with some prompting from our mutual friends. Holding a grudge didn’t make me a good person, but I had lines, and my brother needed a stern reminder he couldn’t walk all over me just because we shared blood. I’d planned his wedding out of my love for him.

  That love didn’t mean I needed to tolerate him stepping on me.

  The reply from Rick caught my attention, and I clicked it to discover he’d left his phone number and a request to call him.

  As I liked Rick a hell of a lot more than I liked my brother at the current moment, I fell for his bait, picked up my new cell phone, and dutifully dialed, already grimacing over my cell bill for calling overseas.

  Then again, thanks to a huge raise and chasing an impulse to do what I wanted in my life rather than what my family wanted for me, I could afford it.

  “Fredrick speaking,” Rick answered, and I recognized the tone as one a businessman used when he hadn’t bothered to check his Caller ID.

  “It’s Hope,” I replied, already worrying I’d made a mistake calling him. The last thing I needed was another reason to like the man who’d made it clear he’d be marrying someone within the next year or two. Being friends with him would hurt, but I’d do my best to make the most of it. I’d even do my best to be friends with the woman who’d won him. She had to be something special to earn the affections of someone like Fredrick. “I got your email. You have successfully corrupted me into reading absurd news articles. I hope you’re happy with yourself.”

  He laughed, and I smiled at the sound. “I’m quite pleased with myself, thank you. Your brother is pitching a fit, and judging from what I’ve learned, you’re doing something sneaky, sly, and concerning for all parties excepting yourself. Also, I have received a picture of your new car. It’s spectacular—and I mean that in a good way. I never knew a Mercedes could become something so fun. I’m almost tempted to get a matching one, but I’d go with black and silver glitter.”

  Yep, the upcoming months of my life would be bitter and sweet. Maybe he had a single brother who wasn’t in line to marry someone else. His sense of humor and kindness had to be genetic, right? “You should totally do that. But you should get a nicer model and buy yours new. I’m fairly sure you can afford it. Mine’s used, but she runs well, and she likes her new paint job. The interior even has glitter accents. I’d say I’d refer you to the paint shop, but he’s in America and you are not.”

  “At least for the moment. It seems work may be moving your way at some point in the near future. Can I ask what’s going on?”

  “It’s nothing all that important. Mat said something I’m going to make him regret, and I just secured myself a huge pay raise with overtime on a salary. Actually, I’m doing great. Don’t tell him this, and please don’t tell him you’ve spoken to me, but this has been the best thing I’ve done for myself in forever.” Mat wouldn’t agree with me, but Mat needed to learn my life was my problem rather than his—and that I needed to do things for me.

  “As long as you’re happy, I’m all right with this. Your friends are worried, as you wouldn’t tell them where you went.” Rick paused, and then he sighed. “They’re hoping I will talk sense into you, but it seems you’ve already talked sense into yourself. All that said, your friends really are worried about you, and they aren’t sure why you won’t talk to them about this.”

  “Well, they’re all blabbermouths and would snitch to my brother at the first sign of pressure.”

  Rick chuckled. “I expect you’re right about that, as they did just that with me when I pressed about your situation. Your friends called me.”

  “They called you?” They must have talked to Mat, Mat must have decided Rick was the best chance of getting through to me and had involved the poor man in my midlife crisis. Then, because Rick was a far better man than Mat realized, Rick had joined my team—or would play at being on my team.

  I’d find out soon enough; if Mat contacted me, I’d know who had given him my new number.

  “You like me a lot more than you like your brother right now, I’m a trustworthy party, apparently, and they think I can talk sense into you. I think you’ve talked sense into yourself, and I gave my immediate approval of your choice of vehicle. It suits you. I then told them sometimes it takes a baseball to the head to knock sense back into people. I hope you don’t take offense to this, but you struck me as the type to put everyone over yourself. This is just you doing something for you for a change, and you don’t expect much in the way of support, so you’re doing it on your own.”

  Yep. Friendship with Fredrick would hurt as much as it helped, and I’d forever envy the woman lucky enough to win him. It might take a few years, but I’d keep reminding myself if one man like Fredrick existed, there were others, too. Billions of people meant surely there was a hot, single guy with good manners and a better personality out there for me. I could live without him being hot, as long as he had the good manners and a better personality. “Hot damn, someone who finally gets me.”

  “Been there, done that. My move to the United States is partly bullshit induced as well. Not your bullshit, as nothing you’ve done yet has been even close to being bullshit. There are some others, however, who have dragged me right to the end of my rope.”

  “Sounds like we’re birds of a feather right now.”

  “That we are. Would you be willing to give me a general idea of your location? Just the state will do. I would find it rather amusing and enjoyable trying to locate you through a series of clues you can leave for me. It’ll be a scavenger hunt. Put me through the run around. I need a challenge.”

  “Well, I am supposed to be planning a wedding for you.”

  “I’d still like your help with that. The wedding
date is still up in the air, but I showed my family the work you’d done on Mat’s wedding, and I even told them about the ball and chain. My mother wasn’t all that happy about it at first, but then I reminded her that the bride was quite prone to running at the altar, and you managed to make the wedding happen, which is a miracle as far as I’m concerned. Actually, I was concerned there wouldn’t be a wedding at all after Mat told me who he was marrying. She has a reputation.”

  Yeah, I’d figured that one out on my own. “Well, she’s his problem now—and so is their baby.”

  “Baby?”

  “Baby. It’s a very young human that is born approximately nine months after the start of a pregnant woman’s menstrual cycle, which is typically two weeks before conception. They cry, drink milk, and make a mess of diapers. After a period of twelve years, they grow into teenagers determined to drive their parents insane. It seems there was an incident with a broken condom.” I shuddered at the thought of my brother having sex with anyone, especially Amy. “And that’s how far I want to go down that particular rabbit hole.”

  “Me, too. However much I enjoy sex with a willing partner, Amy is not what I consider attractive. At all.”

  “Strangely enough, I don’t consider her to be very attractive, either.”

  “Then we are agreed. Mat can deal with his wife, and we will do our best to avoid thinking about his wife.”

  I smiled. “It’s nice having an ally in this.”

  “We won’t tell anyone what we think about her. So, if you’re willing, I have a few questions for you.”

  “Only if you’ll answer my questions,” I countered.

  “Deal. Are you game to play a scavenger hunt with me? My goal will be to find you, and you have to leave me a clue at least once a week.”

  “That’s a lengthy period between clues.” I considered why he might want so long between clues and came up with no reasonable explanation. “Why?”