“I can imagine. Anyway, I hope you have rested from your journey?”
Phillip knew better than to say otherwise, so he nodded his head yes.
“Very good, because I have your next assignment.”
“Already, sir?” Phillip had hoped to accompany Charlotte back to England, but he didn’t want to raise suspicions by making that request.
“I need you to take a copy of these orders to our men in the south of France. They will be the fastest to arrive at those secret routes. I would send one of the regular couriers, but I need someone who knows every aspect of the information. If anything has changed with the position of our men, I know you can help with the strategic end of things.”
“Commander Barnes, I am not a military man. Wouldn’t Hugh be better for this, given he is in the Army?”
“Captain Fitzsimmons has his orders, which will take him in a different direction. I need you to do this, Phillip, unless there is a reason you cannot go?”
Phillip wondered if the commander was questioning his relationship with Charlotte. He straightened in his seat, “There is no problem, sir.”
“Good, you leave first thing in the morning.”
After the meeting Phillip took a long ride to clear his mind. Why should it be so hard to except the mission? Wasn’t that what he wanted? His mind pulled him in two directions. The practical part told him to forget her and live his life of self-imposed solitude, it was the only way to not get hurt. The impractical side of his brain told him he should take his chance at happiness and tell Charlotte how he felt. Both sides warred with each other and by the evening he had decided. Whether or not his heart agreed with his decision was another matter.
Commander Barnes and the three young men gathered in the salon that night before dinner. They fell silent as Charlotte entered the room. Her beauty again took aback Phillip. She now wore a garnet gown, which made her look exotic. She was obviously unaware of the impact she had on them. Even the commander was stunned into silence but was the first to find his tongue. “Good evening, Miss Bradley. How nice of you to join us for dinner. I hope you are well-rested?”
Charlotte smiled, “Thank you, Commander. I must admit I feel ashamed for sleeping so long, but it was much needed.” She glanced in Phillip’s direction. It was the first hint that she even noticed him. The butler came in to announce dinner. Commander Barnes offered Charlotte his arm, which she graciously took.
At dinner, they focused the conversation on general topics, such as the weather, royal gossip. The men asked Charlotte polite questions about her family.
“You will be well looked after on your journey home. Lord Norris will make sure you get to your family safely, Miss Bradley.” Commander Barnes smiled and took another bite of his dessert.
Charlotte paused and glanced at Phillip. Did she assume he would escort her home? “Thank you, commander, for being so considerate of my well- being.”
“It is the least we can do, considering what you have done for us. Lord Norris has business in London, so it makes sense for him to see you home. Phillip has orders to leave in the morning, plus I’m sure you’ve had more than enough of his company,” the older man chuckled.
Phillip could have sworn he saw a look of sadness on Charlotte’s face, and he didn’t know what to make of it. They spent the rest of the meal in relative silence. After dinner, Charlotte excused herself and retreated to her room.
Phillip, along with his friends, retired to the drawing-room for a glass of sherry. Hugh passed out drinks to everyone before he settled on a chair by the fire. They sipped their drinks in silence.
Hugh was the first to break the awkward silence, “Well, am I going to be the one to ask the obvious question?” Ethan and Phillip looked confused. Hugh chuckled, “What is Phillip going to do about the lovely Charlotte?”
Phillip sputtered, “What are you talking about, Hugh?”
“Don’t act like an idiot, Phillip. It doesn’t become you.” Hugh took another swallow of his drink. “A man would have to be blind not to see you have feelings for the girl. Ever since Ethan and I came upon you two, you haven’t been able to take your eyes off her.”
Phillip slammed his glass on the table and sprung from his chair. His friends rarely pried into his private affairs. “What do you want me to do, Hugh? I leave in the morning for the south of France. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone or if I’ll even come back.”
Ethan spoke up, “Don’t be so dramatic, dear chap. You’ll be fine like you’ve always been. But Hugh is right, it’s obvious.”
“What?” Phillip made his way to the fireplace and leaned against the mantle. He had his back turned away from his friends, but he could still hear their words.
“You love her.” It was a simple statement, but when Ethan said it out loud, putting a voice to his thoughts, his knees went weak.
Phillip couldn’t face them. “And what if I do?” He turned around before continuing. “What do I have to offer, Charlotte? A life of waiting and wondering if I will come back alive. Nights spent in bed with a man who has nightmares because of his past?”
Ethan glanced at Hugh. They both knew Phillip had been through more than either of them could imagine, but they still wanted to help their friend.
“Take my advice,” Ethan said, “If Charlotte makes you happy, then don’t let her get away. Don’t do what I did and let her slip through your fingers.”
“Do you still love Kate, even after all this time?” Phillip saw the hurt on his old friend’s face and already knew the answer.
“I love her as much now as I did all those years ago. Do not do what I did and wait until it’s too late.”
Hugh chimed in, “Phillip, if the girl is in love with you despite your flaws, then why not take a chance?”
Phillip smiled at Hugh, “This from the man who has bedded more women than any man I know.”
“True, but only because I haven’t found a woman I truly love. If I fell in love with someone, I would do everything in my power to keep her.”
His friend’s words made sense, but Phillip still hesitated. “I will let Charlotte go home. She deserves some time to gather her thoughts, and she needs to be away from me to do so.” Phillip’s friends argued with him, but he continued, “If I tell her how I feel now, it may cloud her judgment. She may even believe she loves me. But what if she goes back to England and finds someone else? I don’t want her to feel beholden to me. She may feel differently once she has time to reflect.”
Ethan sighed in defeat, “Fine, if that’s your decision.”
“It is. Ethan, you will take care of her on the trip?”
Ethan walked over to Phillip and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “I promise, my friend, nothing bad will befall Charlotte. I will look after her like she was my sister.”
Phillip was content with the answer and left the room. He made his way up the stairs and was halfway down the hall when he paused. Maybe he should say his goodbyes to Charlotte tonight. He didn’t know if she would be awake when he left tomorrow. Phillip knew where Charlotte’s room because he had inquired about it earlier in the day. Now, he stood in front of the door, his palms sweaty, and his pulse quickening. It could be the last time he would see Charlotte, and he felt nervous and uneasy. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
Chapter 16
Charlotte had had a lot of time to think since they had arrived. After she had given her report to Commander Barnes, she had practically fallen asleep during her bath. She had eaten and fallen into a deep slumber, and she hadn’t stirred until almost noon the following day.
When she awoke, the maids helped her to dress for the day. They told her they weren’t accustomed to having a woman of breeding in the house, and they welcomed the opportunity to fawn over her. She appreciated their small kindnesses toward her. They made sure her dresses were wrinkle free, her gloves were crisp, and her hair was flawless. The maids coddled her, which was nice after her days spent on the road, wearing the same clothin
g. There was a sense of normalcy with the routine, but, deep in her heart, she knew nothing would be normal for again.
She had spent part of the day in the garden enjoying the sun and the sound of the birds. While strolling along the paths, she admired the many varieties of flowers, some she had never seen before. Charlotte’s mind had been at peace for the first time since starting on her journey from Austria. Later in the afternoon, she had had tea in her room, and had let her thoughts wander. Somehow, she always came back to Phillip. Hopefully he hadn’t mentioned their intimate encounters to Commander Barnes. She prayed he didn’t have to report on every single thing that had occurred on this trip.
Charlotte had wanted to seek Phillip out, but she had thought better of it. He had more important things to do than to talk to her. She had hoped he might see her home, which would give her a few more days in his company. At dinner that evening when Commander Barnes had explained that Lord Norris would accompany her home, she almost crumbled. Then, the older officer had stated that Phillip would leave on another assignment. Charlotte wondered if Phillip had asked to not be with her any longer. The idea had been too much to bear, so she had excused herself from the table.
Now, Charlotte sat by the fire with a cup of tea in her hand. One of the maids had helped her change into her nightgown and had readied a traveling dress for the next morning. Charlotte stared into the flames, then heard a knock on the door.
“Come in.”
Phillip entered the room. Charlotte’s heartbeat raced, and warmth enveloped her body. He still wore his dinner attire, and he was, without a doubt, the most dashing man she had ever seen. She wanted to yell out that she loved him, but the look on his face made her pause.
Charlotte waited for Phillip to speak. “I wanted to say goodbye now, since I may be gone before you wake in the morning.”
Charlotte couldn’t believe how detached he seemed, after all they had been through. She put her cup down and stood to face him. She struggled to steady her voice, “I want to thank you, again, for protecting me and saving my life.”
Phillip snickered, “I didn’t do a good job, did I? Messed it up a little at the end.”
“You came for me, Phillip, that’s all that matters. I’m here because of what you and your friends did. I can never repay you.” She wanted to reach out to him but stopped herself. Even though Charlotte knew this moment would come, she didn’t think it would be so difficult. Phillip was distant. He had already shut himself away from her, widening the chasm between them.
“I did what I was supposed to do,” Phillip replied matter-of-factly.
Fine, if that’s how he wanted it, then she would let him go. Apparently, he had already decided that a further relationship between them was not feasible.
“Well, sir,” she spoke with a sharp edge to her voice, “I am sorry to have been so much trouble. You must be glad to be rid of me at last. Now that you have said your goodbyes, you can saunter off to find your next mission to save the world.” Charlotte turned away from Phillip. She wouldn’t let him see her tears.
That was the end of it. She waited to hear the door close, but it never happened. Instead, she heard the key turning in the lock. She whipped around and saw Phillip standing by the door; a look of longing now on his face. Warmth swirled in her stomach.
“You are right, Charlotte, you have been trouble. From the first time I met you, you have made my life miserable. I have been shot, chased, and forced to sleep outside, and I have had to kill men. I’ve done all of this for you.”
Charlotte’s chin jutted up in defiance, “Now, you will never have to see me again. You will be safe in your cocoon, hidden away from me and every other woman.”
Phillip stepped closer, “Now, that is where you are wrong, Charlotte. You are not like any other woman I have ever met. You are strong and intelligent and also, kind and gentle. You have hidden strengths that you were unaware of until this trip. There is something else, a hidden passion. I have seen it firsthand, and it is intoxicating.”
Charlotte watched him. She didn’t know if Phillip was saying goodbye or pronouncing his feelings for her.
“Charlotte,” Phillip sighed, “although we must part ways in the morning, we still have tonight. I came here to say goodbye, but I find my need for you growing the longer I’m in your presence. Let me be with you one more time.”
A single tear trailed down Charlotte’s cheek. Phillip closed the remaining space between them and wiped it away with his thumb. She knew she should tell him to leave. His suggestion should insult her, but she was selfish. Charlotte wanted Phillip, even if this was the only way.
Her mind made up, Charlotte snaked her arms around Phillip’s neck and drew him in for a kiss. Burning desire flooded Charlotte’s senses the instant their lips touched. Electric pulses raced up and down her body. This was what she craved, his touch, his taste.
He released the plait in Charlotte’s hair, allowing her dark curls to flow down her back. He cradled her neck and angled her mouth to deepen the kiss. The love and desire she felt for Phillip swept away her. Every inch of her body burned with the need for him to possess her.
Phillip’s tongue press against her lips; it was all she needed to open to him. He intruded upon her mouth, hot and fast, making her a prisoner to his passion. Knowing she was the only one he desired was intoxicating. Charlotte was greedy, and ravaged his mouth just as fiercely. Her kiss held all her pent-up desire for him, mixed with the hurt she felt at the thought of him leaving. She would take every pleasure she could since she knew there would be no one else for her.
Phillip swiftly untied the ribbons on the front of her nightgown and let it fall to the floor. He stroked up and down Charlotte’s back, burning a trail with his caress. The sensations from his hands and lips ignited a fire inside her. Charlotte's fingers itched to touch Phillip. She hastily removed his dinner jacket. Phillip relinquished his hold on her for the seconds it took to shake his arms out of the jacket. His hands cupped her face and claimed her mouth once more. No matter what he said, Charlotte knew his feelings for her ran deeper than he would admit.
Charlotte tore at the buttons on Phillips shirt and yanked it out of his trousers. He finally broke their kiss. His eyes spoke of the desire boiling just beneath the surface. Charlotte’s skin was flushed from his touch, and moisture pooled between her thighs. She wanted him now.
Phillip led Charlotte to the bed and laid her down. She watched as he removed the rest of his clothes before joining her. Every inch of him was chiseled as if from a sculptor's tools. She noticed the scars that wrapped around his backside, but they didn’t matter. He was her protector and lover, and that was all that mattered.
Phillip made his way over to the bed. Charlotte shivered in anticipation. Her body hummed for the need of his touch. He braced himself above her, and she felt his hand between her legs. Charlotte’s head fell back in ecstasy. Every inch of her burned with carnal desire to have him inside her.
At first, Phillip stroked just outside her entrance. He purposefully avoided the one spot that would take her over the edge. She moved her body, trying to get him to touch her delicate nub. He knew what she was doing, and it made him chuckle. Charlotte smiled back. It warmed her heart to hear him laugh; it had been too long.
While fondling her loving folds, Phillip brought his head down and captured her lips in another soul-reaching kiss. Charlotte circled her arms around him and glided her hands down his back. She felt all the tough ridges and scars. Each one told the story of a man who had loved and who had been betrayed. Charlotte wanted to be the happy ending of the story, where the hero learned to love again.
Charlotte was so overcome that when Phillip at last found his way to her sensitive clitoris, she came instantly. Convulsive waves of pleasure shook her body, and she was powerless to stop it. She cried out Phillip’s name while her lips were still on his. As she cried out, Phillip slid his tongue into her mouth, changing her cry into a moan of desire.
“God, I missed
that,” Phillip said, his voice husky with desire.
“What?”
“The way you cry out when I stroke you. I love knowing I can give you such pleasure.”
His words made her love him even more, if that was possible.
Next, Phillip made his way down to her breast and feasted on the sensitive tit. Her nipple hardened under his ministrations, leaving little doubt of her arousal. At the same time, he massaged the other breast with his hand. Charlotte arched into his mouth, unashamed to show him what she wanted. She sighed with contentment as she ran her fingers through his chestnut hair.
He switched sides, giving both breasts the same loving attention. Charlotte could feel herself growing wet again, every nerve ending in her body, waiting for his next caress. She didn’t have to wait long.
Phillip rose back up to capture Charlotte’s lips and charged into her waiting mouth. He took a part of her into him with every kiss. She wondered if he felt the power of this moment as much as she did. Charlotte lost all thought as Phillip trailed kisses down her quivering body. He seared a path from her breasts to her abdomen and then continued. It confused her until he stopped at the junction of her legs.
Phillip kneeled on the floor beside the bed. The hungry look in his eyes showed the depth of his passion for Charlotte. He pulled her toward him and placed each of her legs over his shoulders. She was completely open to him. Charlotte felt exposed and tried to close her legs but could not.
Sensing her unease, Phillip spoke, “Don’t be ashamed, Charlotte. You have a beautiful body. I’m on my knees, worshipping you.”
As he lowered his head between her legs, he smelled her musk. His rough tongue lapped at her smooth mound; the friction was exhilarating. Her body rose off the bed from the sheer intensity of the pleasure. Phillip’s tongue teased her entrance as he inserted two fingers into Charlotte’s channel. She moaned in ecstasy. Never had she imagined such pleasure could exist. Phillip pumped his fingers in and out, and Charlotte met every stroke with her hips. Tension coiled in her pelvis, and she knew she was close to release. She increased her rhythm, and Phillip followed her lead. He inserted another finger, and she surrendered as the orgasm ripped through her. Then, when Charlotte thought she could take no more, Phillip sucked her throbbing bud into his mouth. Stars flashed before her eyes as another explosion rocked her body.
The Way to a Spy’s Heart: A Steamy Victorian Historical Spy Series (Romancing Intrigue Book 1) Page 13
