by T. S. Joyce
Lena stood up on tiptoes and kissed him softly, just a brush of her lips to tell him she was in this. “You don’t know me yet, but you will. You don’t trust me yet…” She cupped his cheeks and dragged his gaze to hers. “But you will. I’ve never seen a man more suited to me, Jenner Silver.” She smiled absently and kissed a long mark that ran the length of his collarbone. “Jenner Silver, bearer of silver scars. Who have you shared these with?”
His Adam’s apple bobbed as he shook his head slow, drawing a satisfied smile from her lips.
“Good.” She traced the latticework of the old marks. “This treasure map is only for me.”
Jenner shivered under her touch and rolled his eyes closed for a second, and when he opened them again, they looked darker somehow.
“I’ll be gentle with you,” he promised. His voice was gravelly, tapering into a low humming that barely registered. “You deserve gentle.”
“Okay,” she murmured. Maybe it was hard for men to be gentle. Or perhaps it was just big, dominant brawlers like Jenner who had trouble taking it slow with a woman. She didn’t have enough experience to understand why his declaration sounded so much like an oath.
Jenner cupped the back of her neck and lowered his lips against hers. The second their skin touched, a drum of thunder rolled in the distance, so loud it vibrated through her chest. Or perhaps the deep sound had rattled from Jenner. He angled his head and deepened their kiss, pushing his tongue gently past her lips.
He eased her back, laid her down, but where she expected the shock of cold sand against her back, it was soft and warm instead. A blanket. He’d brought a blanket. He’d planned this and prepared for her comfort. Wild Jenner had compromised. He would bed her out in the wilderness where he was most at home, but he would make her comfortable.
And suddenly, she was devastatingly relieved she’d saved her first time for this moment. She would never forget this. His soft lips, his searching hands, cupping her breasts, brushing her ribcage, running down the length of her bent leg as he settled in the cradle she created between her knees. Lightning lit up the sky behind him, casting him in this otherworldly glow as his eyes looked volcanic and dark, hungry for her whenever he eased from her lips to look at her. This wasn’t the passionate loss of self-control that they’d fallen into earlier. This was a conscious decision to let this be special. To allow them to bond in ways that would tether her heart to this masculine, capable, incredible man.
Right now, she couldn’t help but feel utterly overwhelmed with how important he was. With a slight smile lifting one corner of his sensual lips, Jenner lowered his mouth to her breast and drew her nipple between his teeth. He sucked hard, and she gasped as her hips rolled against his in reaction. Oh, he could control her body. Could draw her emotions like he had direct access to her soul.
Lifting up, he hovered over her, stony torso in shadow, and long, thick shaft jutting between them, intimidating her completely.
“Jenner,” she whispered, about to voice her concerns on the physics of their pairing, but he was busy working biting kisses down her belly and oh! Those sexy teeth of his grazed her inner thigh right before he kissed her sex, right where she was most sensitive. His body moved like water, rolling toward her with every thrust of his tongue, as if it was hard for him not to be touching her.
She couldn’t believe this was happening. This big, beautiful, powerful man had his mouth on her sex, and from the hum that vibrated against her, he was enjoying himself. He thrusted harder into her then pulled away, and now his eyes were on fire. Fevered and hungry in the instant before he lowered his body onto hers and pressed the head of his cock against her sex. Lena clutched his shoulders just to anchor herself. She felt like she was floating or falling, and her stomach dipped dangerously as his lips brushed her neck again.
“I won’t bite you,” he murmured, but it sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than her.
She rolled her hips, and he jerked in response, breath ragged. His fingers gripped the back of her hair gently as he pushed into her slowly, inch by inch. She was tight, and it burned, but he was taking her body in such a way that the pleasure of being connected with him outweighed any pain. His second slow thrust hurt less as her body adjusted to his size, and she ran her fingertips down the curve of his stony arms, flexed and trembling slightly, as if he was holding himself back. Someday she would beg him to be himself—to ruck her up, but not tonight. Tonight, he’d been right. She did need gentle. She needed this—soft sighs, moonlight, control, his eyes on her, that bewildered, intense look on his face that said he was falling as hard as she was. His slow pace stole her nerves away and allowed her to get lost in this moment with him. The next time he rocked into her, she moved with him, gaining confidence with the languid pace he set.
He stretched her, filled her, built the tingling pressure in her middle, then gave her relief every time he slid out. How could anything feel this good? How had she gone her entire life without knowing this kind of connection with a man? That answer was easy. Because she hadn’t met Jenner yet. Jenner was meant to give her this moment, and all the waiting had been worth it.
He let off a sexy moan that said his control was slipping, and when she whispered his name, he closed his eyes tight and bucked into her faster.
“Lena,” he rasped as his teeth hit her shoulder. His hands tightened in her hair, and she was so close, toeing the edge, about to spill over.
And as he slid into her again and again, she knew she was done for. This felt too big. Too essential. Jenner was doing something to her body, binding her to him. She was changing from her marrow outward, and for a moment, it was terrifying, exciting, overwhelming, and perfect.
With a soft gasp, she looked up at him, and he had her. His gaze was so open. So vulnerable. So caring. He was swelling inside of her with each thrust now, pumping faster. Eyes closed and robbing her of that strange, changing color, he rested his forehead against hers and gritted his teeth as a long snarl rattled his chest.
It was that noise that did it. Bowing back against the blanket, she closed her eyes as she detonated around him, pulsing hard, each burst of pleasure feeling better than the last.
Jenner slammed into her now, over and over, faster until he froze and gripped her against him. Warmth spilled into her in hot jets, heating her from the inside out. And as he emptied himself, Jenner did something that baffled her completely. He slowed his pace and began to build the pressure in her middle a second time. But this time around, he kissed her gently until she came again, one orgasm rolling into the next. He hadn’t just flopped over and enjoyed being sated. He’d given her even more of himself and taken care of her needs completely.
She didn’t mean for the tears that rimmed her eyes as she melted into his gentle kiss. She’d never been a woman who cried much, but he’d just touched her heart in ways she hadn’t thought possible.
Jenner eased back, still buried deep within her and apparently content to feel every aftershock from her. “Hey,” he murmured, his face transforming into a worried frown. He smoothed her hair back with a gentle touch. Running the pad of his thumb across her temple, he frowned, then looked at the drop of moisture there with such confusion. “Did I hurt you?”
Lena’s face crumpled as another tear streamed out of the corner of her eye. She shook her head and pulled his palm to her lips. A long kiss on his hand allowed her to stall so that her voice wouldn’t come out fragile and small. “I’m happy.”
Jenner let off a sigh, and his eyes softened immediately over the smile that transformed his face. “Good. That was…” He shrugged his shoulders and looked completely lost for words, but she understood.
“For me, too.”
His lips lifted in a bigger smile just as he lowered them to hers. His kiss made her want to cry harder, which was ridiculous. Why did she feel so raw and open right now? This wasn’t what she’d imagined it would be like. It was as if Jenner was welding her broken pieces back together.
Sh
e clung to his shoulders as he eased out of her, then he rocked them upward. Hand on the creases behind her knees, Jenner pulled her legs around him, stood, then walked them slowly into the creek and lowered them into the waves. With a gentle touch, he cleaned her in the water. She was in so deep with him now. The well of her emotion was bottomless as he kissed her with sweet, biting pecks.
With a grin, she bit him back, pulling on his lip for a moment before she released him. Hugging him close and resting her chin on his shoulder, she murmured against his ear, “My wild Jenner.”
The soft growl rattled his throat again, and her grin widened. He’d spent so much time with the animals, he’d become one somewhere along the way. And for some reason, that fact made her love him even more. Love? Her heart stuttered, and she hugged him tighter so he wouldn’t see the confusion on her face. Burying her face against his neck, she sighed, unsure of whether to be terrified of the emotion or to be happy she was capable of feeling love for a man at all. Through the years, she’d been afraid that part of her heart had been too damaged.
Lightning flashed closer, followed immediately by loud, rumbling thunder, and the clouds opened up, dumping hard rain down on them, splatting in a stinging cadence onto her bare skin.
Jenner’s laugh was infectious and drew giggles from her as he stood them up. Pulling her hand, he led her toward their clothes where they gathered the blanket and belongings, shoved their feet into their hiking boots, and bolted through the pouring rain toward camp.
And he gave her another gift, another moment—one she would remember for always.
Right as they made it into the circle of lantern light near the tent, he turned and graced her with a smile that stopped her heart. It was devastatingly happy and open. His body was built like a brick house and sexy as hell, but that smile showed the man underneath it all. And he was giving that smile to her. Her. His eyes were vivid blue and dancing, the angles of his face sharp as glass, and right here, in this moment, she got her first glimpse of two shallow dimples that bracketed his mouth. His dark hair was soaked, and tiny drops of water clung to the ends, ready to fall, and when she stumbled, he picked her up like she weighed nothing, hustled her into the tent, and then disappeared back out of the flap.
Shocked at how utterly changed she felt, she stood there naked, dripping into her untied hiking boots, arms full of her belongings. She watched Jenner as he pulled a covered Dutch oven from beside the fire and snatched the lantern.
His wide shoulders blocked out the rain completely as he ducked through the tent opening, and after he’d zipped them safely inside, he turned that grin on her again. “You hungry?”
Was she ever. His abs were flexing with every breath, his body tight like a bowstring, and she’d just been with him. Hungry for food and hungry for Jenner, she nodded.
“Good.”
“Good?”
“Yeah,” he said, the smile slipping from his face. “I want to take care of you tonight. I want to feed you.” His words had gone low and gravelly again, and a delicious shiver zipped up her spine.
“I’d like that.” Did she need a man to take care of her? No, but with Jenner things were different. She didn’t mind being vulnerable with him.
She had one towel in her bag and dried off as best as she could before she got into her comfortable night clothes. Her hair was going to dry wild, but from the way Jenner kept slipping her hungry glances, she didn’t think he would mind au naturale. Which made sense. Only a wild woman would do for a feral man like him.
He slid into a pair of jeans but left his shirt off, thank heavens for tiny blessings. His pants were low enough that she still had a fantastic view of those sexy strips of muscle that wrapped around his hips. And as she spread out a sleeping bag to the sound of the pattering rain against the tent, Jenner loaded up two metal plates with steak, vegetables, and steaming baked potatoes. It all smelled so good, her stomach growled, so she wrapped her arms around her middle with a giggle.
He set up their dinner on the sleeping bag picnic style and sat directly across from her. It wasn’t until midway through the meal that he stopped with a knowing grin and asked, “Was it everything you imagined it would be?”
“No.” Heat flooded her cheeks, so she ducked her gaze to her plate of food. “It was much more.”
Jenner hooked a hand under her chin and pulled her face up to meet his. With a light kiss, he settled back in front of his plate and murmured, “I hate when you hide your blushes from me. I’ve never met a woman who colors up so pretty.” He swallowed hard, his eyes growing serious. “I’ve never met a woman so pretty.”
“You’re teasing. I bet you say that to every girl you take to bed.”
His dark eyebrows arched high, and he let out a surprised laugh. “Is that what you think of me?”
“Well…yeah. Look at you.”
And he did. He ran a quick glance over his bare torso and gave her an uncertain half smile as if he thought she was the one teasing now. “Yeah, I’m a great catch. Scarred up hunting guide, off in the woods most of the time, prefers to be alone, emotionally constipated, and sleeps half the damned—” Jenner dropped his gaze and cleared his throat, attention back on his food.
“Day away? I like naps, too. That won’t scare me off.”
But the smile she’d been trying to conjure didn’t return.
“I have six sisters,” she said low, desperate not to let their connection go just yet.
“Six?”
“Yep. It was an all girls’ club growing up, especially after Dad passed. He wanted a son so badly that he and my mom just kept trying.”
“Let me guess. You’re the oldest.”
“What makes you think that?”
“Super responsible, looking out for others, independent.”
“Wrong, wrong, dead wrong. I’m the baby of the family. And”—she scrunched up her nose in disbelief she was about to admit this out loud—“the black sheep of the Rhodes family.”
“No.”
She laughed and tossed a pepper at him. “It’s true. My sisters are all married or engaged. Three of them have given my mom grandbabies, and all of them were settled by my age. Every time I go back for the holidays, I get so excited about seeing everyone and connecting again, and then after about a day with them, I’m clawing my eyeballs out to leave again.”
“Why?”
Lena sighed and lifted her shoulders to her ears in a shrug. “I don’t know.”
“Yes, you do. Why do you run?”
She bit her bottom lip and pushed a piece of steak around her plate. “Because that was supposed to be me.”
“You and Adam?”
She nodded and huffed a laugh. “Sounds so stupid because it was a marriage out of friendship, but I was eighteen and hoping and praying on my knees every night that Adam would pull through, and then I was widowed three weeks after I turned nineteen. I was so young, you know? And for a minute, my life had made sense, and then all the sudden it didn’t anymore, and I didn’t know how to stop the tailspin. Every time I go back home, I have to hear the speeches about how it’s time I moved on, and I get so angry at them. It’s so easy for people to say that. Easy to say and almost impossible to do. It’s so flippant. Just, ‘Lena, you need a man.’ But I had one, and I didn’t recover. Every time I go home, I come out of it eager to travel again for this job. I take more assignments than anyone else because I have no one tying me to anything.”
Jenner’s eyes were on her, sad but understanding.
“I guess I’m still in the tailspin, huh?”
“My brother was the one that made these,” he murmured, gesturing to the long silver slashes across his chest. “I understand tailspins.”
Shocked, Lena stared in horror at his scarred up torso. “Your brother did that how?”
Jenner shook his head. “He didn’t mean to. My other brother Ian saved me, but barely.”
“You have two brothers?”
A smile stuttered across his face. “We’re
triplets. Multiples are common in my lineage.”
“You’re a triplet?” Her voice had jacked up an octave. “I don’t even think I’ve met a twin before. Can you read each other’s minds?”
He laughed. “No. I’ve only seen them a handful of times in the last few years, and most of that has been recently.”
“Why?”
“We don’t get along so well. We try, but there is just a part of us that is too competitive to spend any actual quality time together. One of my brother’s, Ian, he regrets the broken relationship. He’s always tried to reach out, and I’ve swatted him down. Tobias is even worse than I am.”
“Wait, so which brother did that?” she asked, flicking her fingers toward his silver scars.
“Tobias.”
“What? I flew in a plane with him! Is he dangerous?”
“Yes, but not to you. And this was an accident. It happened when we were sixteen.”
“You said Ian saved you. Where were your parents?”
“Uh.” He sat up straighter and wiped his hands, clearly uncomfortable with where the discussion had ended up. “Mom wasn’t in the picture. She couldn’t handle multiples, and Dad was more of a hands-off kind of parent. He wanted us to figure everything out on our own. Ian, Tobias, and I were kicked out of the nest at sixteen, and the accident happened right after that.”
“Oh, Jenner. Do you think that is part of the reason for the rift? Maybe Tobias feels badly.”
“Tobias doesn’t feel anything.”
The food sat in a lump in her stomach, so she pushed the plate away and drew her knees up to her chest to ward off the chill that was suddenly rippling gooseflesh over her arms. “I’m sorry.”
He watched her quietly, head canted as if he couldn’t figure her out. “You’re different from other people. Different to me. You don’t mind things about me that make others uncomfortable.”
“Like what?”
“Like that heaviness in the air that has you drawing into yourself. That’s me. Most people move away from it on instinct, but not you. When the air around me gets heavy, you stop ducking your gaze and look right into my eyes. You’re doing it now.”
