“Anything you want.”
I bit her bottom lip gently. “Stop saying things like that.”
“Why?”
“Because it makes me want to do it.”
She smiled over my lips. “Good.”
“You’re evil, Farrah.” I laughed a little. “You don’t think I want to fuck you right now? I’ve never wanted anything more in my life.”
“I don’t care about anything else, Jace. I just want you. All of you,” she begged. “Please.”
Lowering my mouth to her neck again, I spoke into her skin. “Christ...stop begging for it.”
Then, I just had to know. Lowering my hand, I slipped it under her dress. Her panties were soaked, and the warm heat of her pussy felt beyond incredible at my fingertips.
She panted. “It’s crazy what you do to me, how wet you make me.”
I moved my fingers in and out of her while my dick ached to replace them. At this rate, I knew I’d inevitably be inside of her. If it wasn’t tonight, it would be tomorrow or the next day. Still, I remained adamant that it not be tonight. She deserved better than to be fucked in a parking lot. We were only here because we had nowhere else to go.
I needed to make her come so she’d stop taunting me.
Too far gone to stop this, I rasped, “Come on my hand.” I pushed my fingers in deeper.
She slowed the bucking of her hips. “What about you?”
“Don’t worry about me.”
She repeated her earlier request. “Let me suck you. I want to taste your cum.”
Those words nearly made my dick explode.
I kissed her harder. “I’m not letting you go down on me in my truck like a whore.”
“Treat me like a lady if you want, but you can fuck me like a whore.”
Fuck. “You’re relentless, Farrah.”
I pulled my fingers out of her and licked her arousal off. Her sweet taste sent me into a frenzy. I wrapped my hand around her head and pulled her close again, this time lifting her onto my lap so she straddled me. This was the biggest test of my resistance, because all I wanted to do was take my dick out and let her ride me as hard as I knew she would. But instead, I pushed her down onto my jeans where my cock was bursting through the seams. Her wetness seeped through her panties as she rode me over my pants while my dick throbbed. She moved her hips, pressing her clit against me while I held onto her back. Our eyes were locked on each other until the need to kiss her overtook my desire to see the need in her eyes. I sucked on her tongue as she continued to grind against me. I held on with all my might, trying not to explode.
Her voice was shaky. “I love the way you feel between my legs.”
“Show me how much you love it. Come on my dick.”
Farrah bent her head back and took a deep breath. It seemed like she was trying to prolong the inevitable, trying to hold back her orgasm—until she wasn’t able to anymore. She let out a loud sound of pleasure that anyone in the vicinity might have heard. Thankfully, we were in an empty parking lot. As she bore down on me, I couldn’t take it. I lost control, coming hard beneath her as my eyes rolled back. The grinding tapered down until there was nothing left.
As I looked up at her again, she gave me a snide smile—seeming pleased that she’d caused me to lose it.
Gripping her hair, I said, “Are you happy now, Farrah? I’ve never come in my damn pants before. That was a first for me.”
“I’m glad you let go. I only wish it had been inside me.”
“You’re gonna be the end of me,” I whispered, meaning that with all of my soul.
“What happens now?” She moved off of me and returned to her seat on the passenger side.
“Fuck if I know.”
She looked so beautiful with her hair all messed up and her lips red from our kisses.
Still panting, she said, “Can we not try to figure it out for a while? I just want time with you.”
“And then what? What happens when our time is up?”
“Then we deal with that when it comes.”
“That sounds like a recipe for disaster.” I rested my head on the back of my seat. “You deserve better than to have to sneak around with someone.”
“I deserve what I want. And you’re what I want.”
This was dangerous. She didn’t know what she was saying—even if she meant it.
“You’re gonna get attached to me, Farrah. That’s not healthy. I’m not right for you.”
“You really think I’m not already attached to you? You’re all I think about. Ever since the first moment you kissed me, you owned me. You fucking owned me, and these feelings are not going to just go away like magic because I tell them to.”
Hearing her say I owned her did things to me. My mind raced to find a solution. I kept trying to put this on her when I knew damn well I couldn’t stop it if I tried. I’d been instigating shit just as much as she ever had. The realistic side of me knew this was a dead-end road, yet my brain still tried to come up with any excuse to move forward with what my body needed.
Then I had a lightbulb moment that was likely brought on by my dick: Maybe it was better to give in and get it over with. Maybe there was a way to do this without Nathan ever having to know. I offered her a proposition before I could change my mind.
“The fact that we can’t keep our hands off each other doesn’t change the fact that we don’t have a future together, Farrah.” When she looked down, I placed my hand on her chin so she would face me. “Look at me. This will never work long term. If we choose to keep playing with fire, we have to do it with the understanding that there’s an end point.”
A look of concern crossed her face. “End point?”
“We have to end it before Nathan finds out. He’ll never speak to me again, and he’ll treat you like shit.” I must have been crazy for what I was about to suggest. “Maybe we spend the next month…getting it out of our systems. After the month is over, I’ll move out of the house, so we can have some space to really think about things. Now that Nathan has a job, I feel better about doing that. He doesn’t need me anymore.”
She looked hurt, and I couldn’t blame her. But I didn’t know how else to handle it.
Farrah finally spoke. “So…just be together on the down low for a month and then you leave? That doesn’t sound like a good deal.”
“We’ll see where things are at that point. But either way, I move out of the house, since I think that’s best for all of us anyway.”
Farrah stared off for a bit. “I don’t want you to move, but I understand. It’s better to plan on that since we don’t know how this will end up.”
“I agree.”
She looked out the window, seeming to contemplate my proposal.
Then she turned to me and nodded. “Okay. A month.” She reached for my hand and looped her fingers in with mine. “Where are we going tonight?”
“I don’t think we should be alone tonight. Nathan thinks you’re at Kellianne’s. What are the chances she’ll let you sleep over there for real?”
“Pretty high…unless she has a male guest, which is rare.”
“I’ll go to my parents’ house. Let Nathan think I changed my mind and decided to stay over at Alyssa’s—pretty sure he wanted to be alone with Crystal anyway.”
Boy, I seemed to have no problem lying tonight—lying to Nathan about my whereabouts, and lying to myself, because deep down, I knew there wasn’t going to be any such thing as a clean break after a month’s time. Someone was going to get badly hurt. Possibly two people I cared about. All because of my selfishness.
This felt like a runaway train. I just hoped it didn’t crash and burn, taking all three of us down with it.
• • •
I thought maybe I’d get lucky and be able to sneak into my parents’ house with both of them sleeping. All I needed was to somehow get to my dad’s underwear drawer. But after I used my key to enter, I unfortunately found my mother sitting on the living room couch watching television.
She lowered the volume. “What are you doing here?”
Without saying anything, I rushed past her to their bedroom. Dad shifted in bed as I opened his drawer as quietly as possible to grab a pair of his boxer shorts. It was too dark to find pants, so I’d just settle for these. I couldn’t let my mother know why I needed to change my pants. If she asked, I’d pull something out of my ass.
On my way back out to the living room, I dumped my dirty jeans in a corner of the guest room where I’d be sleeping.
My mother’s eyes widened when she noticed me wearing only a T-shirt and Dad’s gigantic boxer shorts. “What on Earth?”
I plopped down on the couch. “I’m spending the night.”
“And you found the need to take off your pants the second you got here?”
“They have engine grease on them. I was fixing my truck. I wanted to be comfortable.”
Her eyes narrowed. “What kind of trouble did you get yourself into?”
“I told you what happened.”
“I’m not talking about your pants. I mean why are you spending the night?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“This is about Farrah, isn’t it?”
Fuck.
I put my feet up on the coffee table and ran my hand through my hair. “What do you want me to say? You knew from the last time you started to grill me that something was going on there…”
“Does Nathan know?”
I crossed my arms. “No. And he never will.”
“What happened exactly?”
“What part of ‘I don’t want to talk about it’ don’t you understand, Mother?”
She smiled. “You know, when I was younger, I had an affair with your uncle Rod’s best friend, Stephen.”
That surprised me. “Really?”
“Oh yeah. I was only eighteen, and Stephen was a couple years older. Your uncle found us together, hiding in the shed behind Grandma’s house.”
“Well, damn. What did he do?”
“He beat the snot out of Stephen.”
I chuckled. “That sounds like Uncle Rod.”
“That was the end of their friendship.”
“No surprise there. What about you and Stephen?”
“We continued to sneak around for a while. He was really sweet to me, but eventually my feelings waned, and it was too stressful to continue upsetting Rod when it didn’t seem worth it anymore.”
I rested my head on the back of the sofa and stared up at the ceiling. “This story is basically confirming what I already know. If Nathan were to find out about anything happening between Farrah and me, our friendship would be over.”
“Well, that’s the thing. It could be over temporarily. But years later, Rod actually admitted that he regretted his reaction. So, it was a friendship wasted. I understood that the way he found out was shocking. But if he’d allowed himself to get over that, and looked at it objectively, he would’ve seen two people who were crazy about each other, and who never meant to hurt anyone.”
“There’s one big difference between your situation and mine. You said Stephen was a nice guy—probably would’ve treated you like gold if you’d allowed him to. I’ve never been good at relationships. Farrah would end up getting hurt if I led her to believe there was a future for us.”
That wasn’t the only reason I didn’t deserve her. But it was the only one I was willing to admit to my mother tonight.
“So if you’re so sure about the way things should be, why don’t you trust yourself? Why are you sleeping here tonight? You’re feeling guilty about something that already happened, am I right?”
“I think we’re done talking about this tonight.” Kissing her on the forehead, I said, “I’ll see you in the morning.”
In the guest bedroom, I settled into bed and brought my fingers to my nose. I could still smell Farrah. Holy shit. My dick rose to attention as I replayed everything that had happened in my truck—the way she’d told me she wanted to suck me off, the taste of her lips and tits, the way she grinded her pussy on me until we both came. I was completely wired.
Maybe Farrah could sense my energy because a text came in from her a few seconds later.
Farrah: Are you still up?
My first instinct was to once again warn her not to think about me, not to get her hopes up. But ultimately, I relaxed into my pillow and typed out what I actually felt.
Jace: I can still smell you all over me, and it’s keeping me awake.
Farrah: When can I see you again?
Jace: I think we need to pace ourselves. Let’s give it a couple of days. Then we’ll see.
We’ll see. I knew those would be my famous last words.
The dots moved around while she typed.
In the meantime, I sent her another message.
Jace: Don’t forget to delete this text.
A second later, her response came through.
Farrah: Goodnight.
I could sense her disappointment. She probably wanted a more enthusiastic text from me. Believe me, a part of me wanted to tell her I’d be picking her up in the morning to take her home, so we could finish what we’d started tonight while Nathan was at work. But the next time we gave in to our feelings, I knew we’d end up taking it too far. That would mark the beginning of me inevitably hurting her, which I was in no rush to do.
Chapter 15
* * *
Farrah
Two days after my encounter with Jace in his truck, I received a text at 5AM.
Jace: Nathan is leaving at 8:45. Can you call in sick to work?
I got chills.
My shift normally started at 7AM. It would have been ideal to give my boss more notice if I wasn’t going to show up, but there was no way I could refuse the opportunity to be alone with Jace.
Farrah: Consider it done.
I sent a text to my supervisor, letting her know I was “sick” and apologizing for the late notice.
Over the next few hours, I couldn’t fall back asleep. Tossing and turning, I stayed in my bed until I heard the sound of Nathan starting his car.
After he took off down the road, I got up to go in search of Jace. Before I could even exit my room, he appeared at my doorway.
Shirtless, he gazed down at me.
I gulped. My eyes wandered down to the thin happy trail leading the way into his gray sweatpants. He was already hard.
“Hey,” I breathed.
“Hey,” he said, his chest heaving.
I stepped closer and asked, “What did you have in mi—”
His lips were on mine before I could get the words out. Jace’s body pressed against me as he went in search of my tongue. I could feel his massive cock throbbing against me.
“Oh God,” I whispered.
He lowered his mouth to kiss my neck. “I’m going to go to hell for this.”
“I’ll be right there with you.”
He moved back, his eyes traveling the length of my body. “Take off your clothes,” he said. “I want to look at you first.”
My nipples stiffened as I tore off every shred of clothing, paying no attention to where I threw things on the floor. Nearly losing my balance, I kicked my shorts off before slipping my underwear down my legs.
Straightening my shoulders, I stood before him totally nude, the peach fuzz on my legs stiffening. Jace stared at me for several seconds, his pupils dilated. The look of hunger in his eyes alone made me wet. I’d never been stared at while naked before, but there was something so arousing about baring yourself and watching someone devour you with their eyes. My nipples practically turned to steel.
“Touch yourself,” he demanded.
I lowered my hand. As I began to massage my clit, Jace lowered his pants and let them fall to the floor. His boxer briefs came off next. I watched as his gigantic cock sprung forward. It was perfect—huge and glistening—exactly the way I’d pictured it. I salivated, wanting to take it in my mouth.
“Holy shit,” I mutte
red. “You’re beautiful.”
I hadn’t seen anything yet because he started to jerk off as he stared at me. My fingers rubbed over my clit harder. I was incredibly turned on by the look of hunger in his eyes.
“I’ve thought of this moment every night for a month,” he said.
We stayed in place for several minutes, facing each other and pleasuring ourselves. My level of arousal was unbearable.
“Lie on the bed and spread your legs apart.”
My knees trembled as I moved to the bed and lay back, moving my knees as far apart as they would go.
He tugged on his dick several more times before moving onto the bed to hover over me.
“I found your pills in the bathroom once. You still on them?”
I nodded.
“Good. I want to fuck you raw, Farrah. Is that okay? I’m clean. I’ve been safe with everyone else.”
There was nothing I wanted more. “Yes.”
On all fours, he bent to take my mouth in his. “How badly do you want me inside of you?”
“So badly,” I breathed.
“Tell me. Tell me how badly you want me to fuck you right now.”
“I’ve wanted you for as long as I can remember. There is nothing I want more than to feel you inside of me, and for you to fuck me harder than you’ve ever fucked anyone.” I let out a long breath. “Please…please fuck me hard.”
He bit at my collarbone. “You sure you want it hard?”
“Yes.”
“I might hurt you.”
“I don’t care.”
He moved back to look at me, and his eyes darkened with desire. It pleased me to know Jace had gotten to the point where all of his doubts and inhibitions were obliterated.
He spread my legs wider, and I felt his crown at my opening. “Put me inside of you,” he said.
Placing my hand around his rigid cock, I felt how wet it was at the tip. I circled his crown around my opening, loving the feeling of his precum against my skin. It was validation. I began to stroke his shaft.
The Crush Page 14
