by Eden Finley
“That Shane and Marcus liked to share. Like girlfriends and stuff. I always wondered how it worked and if there was more to it, but I didn’t want to think about it too hard because, eww, that’s my brother.”
“That was different,” I say. “That was just—”
Mom puts her hands over her ears and sings, “Lalalalalala. I don’t want to know.”
She doesn’t want to know? She wants to pretend I didn’t say anything at all? My heart makes a stuttering thud and then beats faster. I must pull a disappointed face or something, because Mom panics.
“No, I don’t mean I don’t want to know about you and Talon being together. I just don’t need to know, like, the intimate details of what you did in college. Or now. Just … yeah … If Talon makes you happy, then I’ll love him even more than I already do, but like your sister said, eww on the details. Same would go for if you were serious about a woman.”
Relief has my heart calming down a notch. “Really?”
“Of course. Were you really worried?”
“I don’t know. I mean … maybe? I figured it’s kind of unexpected.”
Mom purses her lips. “It’s actually not.”
My mouth drops open.
“I mean, I’m not going to pretend I’ve been waiting for this for years or knew ever since you were a little boy, but there was always something in the way you used to talk about Talon. You were so heartbroken when he graduated and left. But then I met that horrible girlfriend you had when you were first signed to the NFL, and I thought I must’ve been wrong about the whole Talon thing, because you’ve never been like that with any other man. I chalked it up to hero worship.” Mom shrugs. “I’m glad you two got your act together after all this time.”
Talon grins. “Hero worshiping, huh? I can totally see that.”
I elbow him. Hard. He lets out an “Oomph.”
“Well, I’m happy for you,” Vanessa says. “Even if it will lead to interesting discussions with the five-year-old.”
“Gabby won’t care,” I say. “She’s not an asshole.”
Talon snorts. “Best uncle ever.”
“I’ll make sure she won’t care, but what about what everyone else will say?” Vanessa asks.
“There won’t be anyone else,” Talon says. “Like, no one can know about this anytime soon.”
“Why’s that?” Mom asks.
“It’d be a PR mess,” I say. “We’d need to talk to our agents and come up with some huge coming-out plan. It’d be doable but an absolute nightmare at this point in our careers.”
Talon side-eyes me. “Also …” He hesitates. “Henderson’s been saying shit.”
“Yeah, what else is new? I honestly think he’s worse than Carter on the homophobe scale but is stealthier about it.”
“At least Carter admitted he was wrong, and he and Jackson have a civil approach of staying away from each other,” Talon says. “But Henderson was pissed at some stupid article that was written about us and how we went to college together and had a ‘bromance.’ It was an innocent article, but because we’ve practically adopted Jackson, he says we’ll catch the gay and all this other bullshit. If we come out as a couple, it kinda feels like he was right even though he’s not. You know he’s not gonna be the only one who’ll say stuff like that. And then what will that do to Jackson’s career? He’s been through enough.”
Just when I think I can’t fall for Talon more, he comes out with that. He’s the best friend any guy could ask for. Even though it’s potentially putting his happiness on the line, he’s trying to protect Jackson, and while I totally understand it, I can’t help being crushed by the weight of what being with Talon means.
I knew it’d be like this, but the Henderson stuff makes the reality hit home.
We’ll have to live in the closet. Not for a while, but a long while.
Then I remind myself that I’ve lived without Talon for six years, and the sting of not being able to touch him in public will still be way better than the gut-wrenching hurt of living without him completely.
“That’s bullshit,” my sister says.
“What’s bullshit?” Gabby asks from the entrance to the hallway, and we all flinch.
“She’s a freaking parrot,” Vanessa mumbles. “Go back to your room, and I’ll be in there in a minute to get you dressed for the day.” Vanessa stands and approaches Talon. “Make him happy, Marcus, or I’ll kick your quarterback ass.” She kisses him on the cheek, and he laughs.
“I have no doubt you’ll be able to do it too.” His eyes meet mine. “And I promise to make him happy.”
As soon as we enter Talon’s apartment after getting back from my Mom’s, I’m on him like white on rice.
I take him off guard, and he stumbles, but with my arms wrapped around him, I save him from falling.
My mouth assaults his, but it’s not like he puts up much of a fight. Our tongues tangle, my cock digs into Talon’s hip, and he lets out a loud moan.
“I woulda thought you’d still be exhausted after last night.”
“I am. And then you said you wanted to make me happy.”
“Ah, and your ADDD kicked in. Got it.”
I laugh. “Something like that.”
Linking our hands, I lead Talon to his bedroom and push him down on the bed so he’s on his back.
“What are we trying this time?” he mocks.
“I was thinking you could fuck me, but if you’d rather play more, I’m okay with that too.”
Talon’s hand pushes down on his cock which is trying to free itself from his pants. “No more playing.”
I lower myself to my knees. My leg protests a little but not enough to stop. I take off Talon’s shoes and socks and then run my hands up his legs and over his thighs.
“How do you want to do this?” Talon asks. “I mean so it won’t hurt your leg.”
“We’ll find a way,” I murmur. “Maybe I’ll brainstorm while sucking you off first.”
“Nghhrl.”
“Is that English?”
“Yes, it’s English for you’re a big fucking tease, and I think you might kill me.”
“No one’s ever died from having an orgasm before. Unless, I dunno, if they’re eighty or whatever.”
I make quick work of his pants and pull them off along with his boxer briefs.
The cock I have memorized, the gorgeous, cut, long, and thin cock, lies against Talon’s stomach. Its angry and swollen head begs for attention, and that’s the exact reason I ignore it.
Lifting the hem of his shirt, I lean over him and kiss my way up his torso. Talon throws his head back, and I love the sounds he makes as I take a nipple into my mouth. My hands move down his sides, gripping his hip and trailing over his heated skin with light, feathery touches, but I refuse to touch his cock.
“I know if I complain, you’re only going to hold out longer,” he says through gritted teeth, “but could we maybe move this along a little faster before I lose my load?”
I chuckle and stand up straight. “Sure thing.” I lose my clothes and then go back to what I was doing, this time slowly moving my mouth closer and closer until Talon’s cock drags along my rough cheek.
It’s been so long since I’ve done this to someone I’m probably gonna be a little rusty, but I don’t care. I’ve been thinking about doing this for so fucking long.
I start small and lick my way over the tip. “Mmm.”
Talon’s hips jackknife off the bed, and he gasps before releasing a string of curses that makes me laugh.
“What? You’re acting like you’ve never had a guy’s mouth on your dick before.”
“Funny, smartass. Less talking. More sucking.”
“Now who’s the bossy one?” I bury my head between Talon’s legs instead of giving him what he wants, and my tongue laps at one of his balls.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Talon whispers.
“Name’s Miller, actually. But I can be your god anytime.”
Talon snorts.
“You’re as lame in bed with guys as you are with girls, and I still don’t know how that line works, but it does. I will gladly worship you for the rest of my life if you keep doing what you’re doing.”
When I’m done teasing his sac, I run my tongue up his hard shaft and flatten it against the pulsing vein.
“God, I love the feel of your stubble.”
He’s gonna love it even more in a second. I engulf his whole cock in my mouth, dusting off the deep-throating skills I learned years ago.
Talon’s breathing becomes shallow. “I don’t want to think about how you’re so good at that.”
A pang of regret hits me, because part of me wishes we could’ve had this back then if I’d only ever gotten the courage to say something. But we were both young, and I can guarantee we wouldn’t be here today doing this had I mentioned years ago that I’ve dreamed of this moment.
They say when fantasies become realities, they’re always a letdown, because nothing is ever as good as what your imagination can conjure. But when you want something so desperately, the surreal experience of getting it won’t let you be disappointed.
Ever since Talon arrived on my doorstep, I’ve been riding a wave of I have to make the most of it and holy fuck, this can’t be real.
Talon lifts his hips, almost making me gag, but fuck, if it doesn’t feel like the best sex I’ve ever had, even though he’s the one getting to have all the fun right now.
He moves in and out of my mouth, and I tell myself to memorize his velvety tight skin and the sound he makes every time the tip of his cock hits the back of my throat.
“Do you want me to fuck you or come in your mouth?” Talon asks. “Because I’m close.”
I’m tempted to let him come—he has the stamina to go again later—but I want this too much, and I want it now.
Reluctantly, I pull off his cock, and Talon’s breathing slowly evens out.
I go to the bedside drawer where Talon pulled out the lube we used last night and smile when I find a box of condoms too. “You really did come prepared.”
“Are you kidding me? I was prepared the night of the Super Bowl, and then I went and got too drunk.”
“Thought I’d let you have a go at my ass that night?” I totally would have, but I’m not gonna say that aloud.
I place the supplies on the bed and then lie down next to him on my side.
Talon pulls me in close and presses his mouth to mine. The air between us goes from playful to serious as he reaches for the lube.
His tongue distracts me while he gets his fingers coated.
“Roll over onto your other side,” Talon whispers against my skin.
I do as he says, putting my back to him, and he moves my good leg so it’s bent but keeps my stupid leg straight.
A finger runs over my surgical scar. “Does it hurt?”
“Bottoming? I guess we’ll find out.”
Talon laughs. “Your scar, dumbass.”
Oh. Self-consciousness makes me want to cover it up, but I don’t know why. I’ve seen the scar in the mirror, and I know it’s ugly, but it’s not like I’m looking at it constantly. I forget it’s even there.
“It doesn’t hurt,” I say. “It feels weird when you touch it—almost like I have like a Band-Aid or something covering part of my skin. Doctor said I could lose some sensitivity there.”
His warm mouth kisses the middle of my back and then my shoulder blade. “Are you sure you’re up for this?”
I nod into the pillow. “Do it.”
His fingers slip between my ass cheeks, and even though I know what’s about to happen, my body tenses when he plays with my rim.
“Relax. We’ll go slow,” Talon coaches.
I try not to tense again when his finger works its way inside. I chant in my head, reminding myself that this is Talon. This isn’t some random hookup from college. This isn’t sex for the sake of sex. This is everything I’ve ever wanted, and he’s all mine.
I loosen up enough for another finger to join his first one, and with the feel of his hard cock resting against one of my ass cheeks, and the way his fingers probe my tight channel, it’s an overwhelming experience.
I want to reach back and pull him close, turn my head and kiss him, but I’m scared if I move or make even a single sound, I’ll lose the sensation I’m quickly learning to like.
“You’re doing so good, baby,” Talon whispers, and I shudder. “You let me know when you’re ready.”
I don’t know if I am, so I rock my hips back and forth, taking his fingers deeper. The sting of stretching returns. “Try three,” I rasp.
Instead of feeling more burn, his fingers leave me completely. I didn’t know how full I was until the loss hits me, and I let out a whimper.
“You still with me?” The snap of the lube bottle opening again fills my ears.
“Uh-huh. Keep going.”
“You sure?”
“Hurry the fuck up and finger my ass, Marc. I’m almost ready.”
Talon laughs. “Mmm, think you’re gonna top from the bottom, hey? I’ve heard about that.”
I lean up on my elbow and turn my head toward him. “Where did you hear about that?”
He sheepishly looks away. “Forums and stuff. I wanted to know as much as I could so I didn’t feel like such a noob.”
“You’re far from a noob. You forget I’ve been there while you’ve prepped someone before.”
“Not with a guy.”
“It’s really not that different.”
Talon’s evil glint appears in his eyes. “That’s not what I’ve read.”
This time when his fingers enter me, they’re on a mission, and it takes no time at all to find their target.
“Oh, holy fucking cheese on a cracker.”
Talon laughs again. “Guess I found your prostate.”
“Don’t stop finding it.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Talon pegs it again and again until his fingers aren’t enough and I crave more.
“Talon,” I croak.
“Yeah?”
“I need you inside me.”
Chapter Twenty-One
TALON
No way in the world am I denying Miller’s request.
Miller’s a quivering mess as I remove my fingers and suit up.
I grip his hip and roll him over that tiny bit more. He’s still on his side, but that tight and round ass is on full display. I can’t wait for the day where I can have him on his hands and knees begging for me to take him hard and fast, but we both know that day is a while off.
“I kinda like you like this,” I say. My mouth ghosts along his back, the rise and fall of his breathing matching mine.
“Pissed off, impatient, and begging for more? Figures you’d like it.”
“Aww, someone’s just cranky because he hasn’t come yet.” Or I’ll ride it out a little longer, because he’s right. Seeing Miller on the brink of losing control is so fucking hot.
“Someone’s cranky because I need it right now.”
I roll my hips, and my sheathed cock rubs over his crack, settling in between his ass cheeks, but doesn’t go near his hole.
He whines, which makes me even harder, but I should put him out of his misery.
“You sure you’re ready?”
“Yes!”
This time when I line up my cock, I tease his hole but don’t push inside.
“I’m going to fucking kill you,” Miller mutters.
“Ah, what’s sex without the threat of violence?” Before he can retort, I inch my way inside ever so slowly.
Miller tenses immediately, so I pause.
“I’m good. I promise. Keep going.”
The last thing I want to do is hurt him, so I go even slower.
The only sound to fill the room is our combined breaths—mine even and slow as I try to think of anything but the tight heat surrounding my cock, and his, fast and erratic, no doubt trying to forget about the dick in his ass.
My hand
makes soothing circles on his hip and his lower back while my lips caress the back of his sweaty neck. “You’re doing so good, baby. So good.”
Miller nods, but his large biceps contract as he grips his pillow tight.
“Let me know if it’s too much.”
His hand reaches back and finds mine. “Never too much with you.” It’s almost inaudible, but it’s there—something I never even knew I needed until it comes out of his mouth.
The feeling of being inside him, of being whole—Talon and Miller—it clicks. It’s something I’ve never been able to define, and until recently, I didn’t understand it.
But now I do.
My soul mate happens to be a male, and I’m totally okay with that.
“I’m good to go,” Miller whispers.
I move slow so he can adjust, and though it takes a little while for him to loosen up, when he does, it’s amazing. Like everything since I started this thing with Miller, it surprises the hell out of me that I went so long without realizing what I had in front of me for years.
Everything is better with him. Not just the sex stuff, but life in general. I could spout shit about colors being brighter and food tasting better, but it’s none of that bullshit. It’s a sense of belonging, of being complete, and everything being right.
“Fuck,” I hiss when Miller rolls back a little so he can reach for his cock.
Nothing has ever felt like this.
“I don’t think I’m going to last.” I can barely talk, let alone fuck. “If I go before you, I promise to blow you until you come down my throat.”
“Mhfkjuhsgd.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.” Pulling out to the tip, I slam back in, and Miller lets out a hoarse cry. “Again?” I ask.
He chants “Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.”
Miller’s hand works his cock so fast there’s no way I’d be able to keep up that tempo, but I try. My hips piston, and I go as hard as I can in this position, which isn’t easy. I lean up on one elbow and push harder.
I try to pull my orgasm back but fail miserably as a shuddering release sets off fireworks in my groin.
I come harder than I ever have in my entire life, and it seems to last for minutes. The world fades around me, and I’m in a blur until Miller’s telltale roar flies out of him as he comes.
